Draco's Second Chance
by slytherin05
Summary: Draco Malfoy did the right thing for the first time ever, that day. Now he has a second chance, can he get everything he wants, including Astoria? (WARNING: includes adult content and content readers may find upsetting) Disclaimer - all characters in this story belong to JK Rowling. Reviews very welcome.
1. Prologue: The Right Thing

PROLOGUE: _The Right Thing_

It was August. It had been almost three months since Draco Malfoy had had to choose between what was right and what was expected of him. Everyone with any relevance to his life had been watching the moment he made the decision to cross the courtyard to join Voldemort and his followers. His mother, who loved him so dearly and would do anything to protect him; his father who had tried to bully him into thinking the way he did for most of his school days; his teachers and friends who hoped he would do the decent thing, just this once; the Gryffindors who knew he wouldn't because he was nothing more than a coward; and the man who would kill him at the blink of an eye and not feel a thing.

When Draco had walked across that courtyard to where his mother and father stood, what real choice did he have? It was walk, or die. His legs were shaking with every step he took as he gave the people who already hated him a reason to despise him even more so. His head was pounded every time his foot hit the ground. With each step he took, he disliked himself more and more for his inability to do the right thing. He reached the Death Eaters and accepted that this was his life now. If Potter was dead, Voldemort was unstoppable, Draco knew that much.

The moment Harry leapt out of Hagrid's arms was the last time Draco would have a chance to correct all the bad things he had done. With a voice screaming in his head, Draco had looked down at the wand in his hand and made his decision within a split second. He didn't recognise his own voice as he called "Potter!" across the courtyard. He didn't feel as though he belonged to the body that was now running towards Harry and he didn't know where the courage came from which made him throw Harry the wand which he was to use to defeat Voldemort once and for all. But he did know one thing: for the first time in his life, he'd done the right thing.


	2. One:Deflation of Ego and a Second Chance

CHAPTER ONE: _Deflation of Ego and a Second Chance_

Malfoy Manor was magnificent. There was no denying it was somewhat tainted from the events which had taken place within, but it was magnificent nonetheless. It had been in the Malfoy family for centuries and was very well preserved. Many of its rooms were furnished with finest oak, and most had their own grand fireplace, the drawing point. The grounds were beautiful too.

Draco used to play for endless hours as a young child, getting lost amongst the hedgerows, hovering over flowerbeds on his first broom, even splashing about in the fountain. He held many happy memories of this home, but everything that had happened over the last year or so made him struggle to see it has home anymore. It wasn't the same place his eight-year-old self had laughed and played without a care in the world.

It was for this reason that Draco had moved out of Malfoy Manor. At least, it wasn't his permanent home anymore. It hadn't been difficult to persuade his mum that he should have a place of his own, especially with his father gone. Lucius had been sentenced to Azkaban where he was likely to spend the rest of his days. Both Draco and his mother had faced trials, too, but were declared innocent for their assistance in the defeat of Voldemort. Draco couldn't help but feel a slight relief with his father gone. He had always made life more difficult than it ought to be.

Draco was now the proud owner of a two bedroom house in central London, Belgravia to be precise, just couple of miles from Diagon Alley. He divided his time between there and the Manor. The house was most modest in comparison with what he was used to, and a hundred miles away from the Wiltshire Mansion where his mother remained. Draco believed the house to be what he needed to establish his independence. Of course, with the Malfoys' vault at Gringotts still piled high with gold, he could have had much more but Draco saw downgrading from a mansion to a small house would give him the help he needed with deflating his ego. He needed to change.

Narcissa was surprised to see her son strolling up the driveway towards the manor at ten o clock on a Thursday morning. He wasn't accustomed to turning up unannounced. She thought to herself how well he was looking, considering everything he had been through.

Draco let himself in, to find his mother in the entrance hall. She looked so happy to see him. His conscience did squirm slightly every time he thought about the fact that he had left her in this huge house alone. To be perfectly honest, he didn't know how she stood to stay there; she was no more pro-murder than he was. He hugged her and kissed her on the cheek and they chatted as they made their way into the downstairs sitting area. Draco sat down in a green leather armchair, his mother taking a seat opposite.

"I received this, this morning," Draco said, holding out a scrolled piece of parchment.

Narcissa's pale hand took it from Draco's and she began to read the letter.

_Mr Malfoy,_

_Here at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, we have been taking into consideration that the extreme circumstances of the previous school year which may have lead to a number of students' failures of their NEWT examinations._

_After much thought, we have carefully selected a number of students who we feel were affected greatly by last years' events and are inviting them to return to Hogwarts to retake their final year if they wish to do so._

_It is my pleasure to inform you that we have selected you as one of the students able to return, as we feel your final grades were affected by either your own or your family's part in the war._

_We understand that returning to school may not be the right option for everyone, and urge you to give this offer much consideration before letting us know your decision. Nevertheless, we hope to see you on September 1st._

_Regards,_

_Professor M McGonagall,_

_Headmistress of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry_

Narcissa read the letter a second time then looked up at Draco who was watching her closely for a reaction which did not come. Narcissa's expression remained neutral.

"What shall I do, mum?" Draco asked, with genuine confusion in his voice.

"What do _you _think you should do?" Narcissa asked, softly. When Draco looked uncertain she continued, "Your father isn't here anymore. You know that, whatever decision you make, I will support you wholeheartedly. You're a man now Draco, you're eighteen. You have to make this decision yourself."

Draco relaxed back into the armchair, considering his options. Going back to school when he didn't have to seemed totally against his personality. But then, wasn't this the perfect time to change for the better, even more so than he already had done? Draco thought about how terrible his final grades had been, and knew he could do much better. He considered the job he so desperately wanted in the future, that he'd never told his family about before. In his father's eyes, he would be the next Minister for Magic.

"I want to work for Nimbus," he confessed to his mother, after a few minutes of thinking things over. "I've loved flying my whole life, it's something I have a passion for. And Nimbus are the best out there. I want to work for them."

Narcissa smiled, remembering the first time Draco had ridden a broom. She nodded for him to continue, sensing it was something he'd kept inside for a long time.

"I know it's not the Ministry, or whatever, but it's something I can relate to and it's something I know a lot about. And that's good. But I don't think the grades I have are good enough to get me where I want to be, so..." He paused, wanting to be certain of himself. "I want to go back. I want to go back to Hogwarts and finish things properly."

He breathed a sigh of relief, as though confident he had made the right decision.

"I always had a feeling you'd want to do something to do with flying," Narcissa smiled. She walked over the the armchair where Draco was sat and pulled him into a hug. "And don't worry about what your father would want. He can't play the high and mighty now, look at him. You have a chance to do something you love Draco, grab it with two hands and don't let go."

Draco hugged her, but did not speak. He admired the strength she was showing. It can't be easy for her facing being alone, her husband in prison, her sister dead and her son only at home for visits. Draco had always been the type of person to shy away from his feelings, to bottle them up. But he was never afraid of the love he felt towards his mother. She would do anything to protect him, rather unlike his father.

"I'll have to tell father, I think," Draco said, uncertainly.

"I don't think there's any need, just yet," Narcissa reassured him.

"Thanks for listening, mum. I hope you're not too disappointed -"

"Draco, I would never be disappointed in you!" Narcissa interrupted him. "Whatever you do, you make me proud. You're my only son, you're all I have left. All I want is for you to be happy."

Draco smiled and decided to change the subject.

"So, what do you fancy for dinner?" he asked, grinning. "I'm getting to be quite the house elf living by myself."

Narcissa laughed. She never thought she'd see the day her son would become domesticated.

"Surprise me..."

Draco stood and made his way out to the garden. At the far left was a bench, hidden by flowers and hedges. He'd always liked to sit there for some peace and quite, some privacy. It was somewhere where he couldn't be observed from the study window because it was totally obstructed from view. Not that his father was there to hide from now, but he lowered himself onto the bench, all the same.

Draco leant back and closed his eyes. He breathed deeply, enjoying that fresh smell of rainfall on a summer day. He reached inside his trouser pocket and pulled out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. Smoking was a habit he had acquired over the last couple of years. He didn't smoke endlessly, he wasn't addicted, but he appreciated the odd cigarette here and there throughout the day. "This is what stress does to you," he thought to himself, inhaling deeply. He leant forward, elbows to knees and blew the smoke out, the cigarette held relaxedly between his index and middle fingers.

He thought back to the time he and Blaise had been caught smoking in the common room by Snape in their sixth year. Snape rarely made visits, especially so late at night, so they'd been sat in a corner of the dungeon room, sharing a sofa. Not many people were around and so Snape noticed straight away, and swept over. Blaise had stubbed his out immediately, apologising. Draco, however, had stared back at Snape defiantly, taking another drag on his. He had lost his respect for Snape during the sixth year. He had become just as intrusive and irritating as the other teachers.

"Put it out," Snape had said in his usual monotone.

Draco had taken a final drag before stubbing the cigarette out on the bare stone wall, keeping eye contact with Snape the whole while. Then he'd simply stood, pushed past his head of house and made his way to his dormitory.

Draco stirred from his thoughts, dropping the remainder of his cigarette on the graveled floor and stepping on it. He stood and made his way back to the house where he found a letter waiting for him on the kitchen table. He knew from one glance at the unsightly handwriting that Theodore Nott had sent it.

_Draco, _

_Me and Blaise have both received letters this morning telling us that we can go back to Hogwarts. I'm guessing you had one too? Anyway, we're going to Diagon Alley tomorrow so meet us there about 11 o clock, if you want. Sorry if you didn't get asked back, mate._

_Theo._

Draco didn't know what to make of the last sentence. _Sorry if you didn't get asked back, mate..._ Theodore knew a tiny bit about what he had gone through, that he didn't really have much choice. Draco shook his head, disbelievingly. He shouldn't have expected him to understand but then, he didn't open up to him, or anyone, about what happened, so why would he? Draco sighed, placing the letter back down on the table. He would meet them at Diagon Alley tomorrow, but he wouldn't let them know he was to do so.

"Mother," Draco called, making his way into the sitting area, where Narcissa remained. She was scanning the Daily Prophet, turning the pages with a certain intent. Draco guessed that this intent was to receive any news from inside of Azkaban.

"Mother," he repeated. Narcissa looked up at her son, noticing again how he looked decidedly more healthy than he had done a few months ago. She felt relief. She had done a lot of worrying over her only child over the past couple of years.

"I'm going to the market to get food for dinner," Draco informed her. A few years ago, the Malfoy fridge would have been filled with every delight you could imagine, but things were different these days. Draco took it upon himself to shop at the market every once in a while and take the food home to his mother. It was true that she could barely be bothered to buy food anymore but it was also true that if good food was around, she wouldn't let it go to waste.

"Okay, darling," she responded, and with that, he left.

Malfoy Manor was set within lovely countryside and stood alone. The nearest civilization was the small village about a fifteen minute walk away. Few wizarding families lived in the area, and the market Draco was going to, which took place in the village every Thursday, was for Muggles. Although he had been taught from a young age to integrate with Muggles as little as possible, his parents had always made it clear that he should carry some of their currency on him at all times.

It was cloudy outside, rain had fallen in the early hours, but the sun was starting to make an appearance through some cracks in the clouds. Draco strolled casually along the country lanes. He could have apparated but had decided against it. He liked to walk alone, sometimes. He had become rather used to it over the last two years.

At the market, he purchased a number of different foods to fill the fridge at home. He couldn't bare to think of his mother not eating, but he couldn't always be there to monitor her actions, especially now he was returning to Hogwarts. Firstly, he bought plenty of meat: chicken breast, pork filet, a joint of beef, lamb steaks, and venison sausages. Next, vegetables and fruit. He was rather partial to a green apple. Finally, the basic things. Eggs and bread were his final purchases and he found a spot out of sight to apparate back to the Manor.

The rest of the day passed quickly, as Draco relaxed in the garden with a book and his trusty cigarettes. His mother even brought him out fresh pumpkin juice she'd made herself. She always managed to pull herself together better when Draco was home.

"I'll stay tonight, mum," Draco had told her when she'd brought out the jug and glass for him. She had smiled so genuinely that Draco felt slightly uncomfortable, thinking that, maybe, if he hadn't have moved out, she would be that happy all of the time.

That evening, Draco cooked his mother a meal of roast beef, potatoes and vegetables. They sat together in their overlarge dining room having relaxed and pleasant conversation, the sort they never had with Lucius around. Narcissa was showing great interest in what Draco wanted to do with his future, which he greatly appreciated.

It wasn't always easy to sleep after everything he'd seen but he felt weirdly comforted knowing that his mother was around. This made him feel somewhat childish but it was only in his thoughts after all. He would never voice those thoughts. After spending some minutes considering the second chance he had been given, Draco drifted into a peaceful sleep.


	3. Two: A Glimpse of Darkness

CHAPTER TWO: _A Glimpse of Darkness_

Draco woke the next morning feeling positive, something which had not happened in a long time. He flicked his wand at the curtains, which opened immediately, sun light pouring through the large window into his old bedroom. This room had been his for his whole life yet there was no real sign of his childhood.

Indeed, it had been full of things that very much belonged to him: clothes, books, interesting objects, toys even. But the furniture had never been to his taste. Draco very much liked modern furnishings and the room was _very _far from modern. The four poster bed, the chests of drawers, the fire place. Now he had a place of his own he was enjoying making it the way _he _wanted it.

Draco blinked at the sun with sleepy confusion, and dragged himself out of bed, across the landing and into one of the many bathrooms of the manor. Draco groaned as he became face to face with a full length mirror after locking the door. He used to be proud of the way he looked, but now there wasn't much to be proud of. His blond hair was a little longer and scruffier than it should be. His eyes still looked tired as they had done when he was working on the vanishing cabinet. He'd definitely put some weight back on over the last couple of months, but that didn't mean there was any sign of the six pack he once used to have. The Dark Mark, though faded, still remained on his left arm, branding him a Death Eater for the rest of his life. This was worse for Draco than the scars which covered his body from duels and... He stopped himself thinking about where the other scars came from. At least _those _showed where he'd stood up for something. The Dark Mark was just a constant reminder of what a coward he had been.

As he dropped his boxers to the floor in preparation for his shower, he made a conscious decision that he was going to change everything he possibly could about his new appearance. Maybe the Mark was there forever, but he could certainly sort his hair out. The scars would remain on his chest, but he could definitely start training again and get his body back. And he was sure eating healthier and finding himself a daily routine rather than lazing around would make him look less tired. He considered himself in the mirror one last time, nodding his head at the plan he'd formed to get back to his old self, and stepped into the shower. Cold, of course. He wanted to feel awake and ready for his meeting with Blaise and Theo and nothing prepared him more than cold water running over his face.

Two hours later, Draco was sat outside of a new cafe in Diagon Alley feeling decidedly fresh. He was smoking a cigarette and drinking fresh juice and he felt good. He'd decided to make a stop at a hairdressers and have his hair cut while he was in the area and he was looking positively awake after his cold shower and early rise. It was warm outside, as the early morning sun had suggested, and so Draco had opted for a short sleeve t shirt and jeans. His forearm was fairly easy to keep out of peoples' sights anyway.

He watched people pass him freely, and was more than happy to go unnoticed. He'd been sat there for around twenty minutes when he saw Theodore and Blaise making their way down the street.

"Blaise!" Draco called out, and took a sip of his juice.

Blaise looked around him, in the general direction of where Draco was seated. Draco raised an arm lazily and half waved, hoping his best friend would notice him. By the smile on Blaise's face, he had. He made his way over and Draco stood to greet him and Theo.

"It's been too long, man!" Blaise said, pulling Draco into a manly hug. Draco would have felt slightly uncomfortable if this was anyone else he was embracing but it was Blaise. They hadn't always been close, but had become so in their fifth year at Hogwarts and Draco felt like he'd know Blaise his whole life. They were similar, they just clicked.

Theodore, on the other hand, Draco _had _known all his life, but he wasn't so keen on him. Yes, they were friends, they spent time together, but Draco had never felt Theo was someone he could trust. He was also highly opinionated, slightly pompous and a bit uptight. Draco found that Theo spent much of their time together trying to get one over on him in some way or another. He and Theo shook hands, rather than hugging, and the pair joined him at his table.

"What can I get you to drink?" Draco asked them. "Juice, milkshake, coffee..?"

"Still splashing the cash about then, Malfoy?" Theo said. "Still smoking as well, I see," he added, looking at Draco's cigarette resting on the edge of the ashtray.

"Yes, Nott," Draco said, bluntly, looking at Blaise who shook his head as if to say "just ignore him."

"I'll have a milkshake please, mate, chocolate," Blaise said.

"A coffee please, black, two sugars," Theo said.

Draco stood behind Theo pulling stupid faces and Blaise struggled to keep his laugh in as Draco made his way into the cafe. At the counter, he ordered the boys' drinks and himself a salad to eat. If he was going to start eating healthily, he may as well start now. He handed his coins over the counter to the young girl serving him, thanked her and went back to the table. A silence fell over Blaise and Theo when he arrived and Draco suspected Blaise had been telling Theo something along the lines of "give him a break." Draco smiled to himself, he had a true friend in Blaise.

"So, how's your summer been, Draco?" Blaise enquired.

"Dull," Draco said, honestly. "Apart from getting my new house sorted, I haven't done anything and the only person I've seen is my mother."

"Oh, yeah, the new house, how is it?" Blaise asked, enthusiastically.

"Really good, actually. It's so good to live on my own, it suits me. I have a spare room, come and stay some time before we go back to school if you want." Draco thought for a second and added "That's if you're going back..."

"Of course he's going back," Theo said, snidely. "To be honest, Malfoy, I'm surprised you are. You don't even need a job, do you, what with all the gold stashed in your vault?"

Draco was about to retaliate but saw the waitress bringing out their food and drinks. One of his promises to himself was that he would not get angry in front of a girl. He supposed it was most intimidating for them as he had a pretty nasty temper.

The girl set the drinks and down, followed by Draco's seafood salad. Draco thanked her once more, and she left. He began tucking into his food, Theo staring at him with a bemused expression.

"Since when do you eat seafood? And _salad_?"

"Oh, you'd be surprised, Nott. There are going to be some big changes in me this year, and not just my eating habits. So get used to it."

Theodore snorted, which Draco chose to ignore. He was quite liking the new, relaxed version of himself.

"So how was your summer, Blaise? Where did you jet off to this year?" Draco asked.

"Oh, I've been around a few places," Blaise said, matter-of-factly. "Geneva, St Tropez..." he trailed off, not wanting to sound too arrogant.

"Very nice," said Draco, sounding impressed. "Well, you've had a better summer than I've had, mate."

"You should have written, or something. You definitely could have come along. Maybe next year."

Draco chuckled softly at the idea. "I haven't exactly been the type of guy you'd want to take on a jolly holiday with you these last few months. But next year, definitely."

The three Slytherins whiled away some time sat outside the cafe, catching up. Draco and Theo bickered as usual, but it was mostly harmless. Draco settled back in his chair and lit up his second cigarette of the day. Not bad considering it was nearly 2 o clock. Just then, two girls approached their table. The first was fairly tall, very slim, with dark red hair. It was Daphne Greengrass, a Slytherin girl in the same year as they were. Behind her stood a shorter girl, also slim, her hair falling down in loose brown curls. Astoria, Daphne's sister, two years their junior.

All three boys greeted Daphne, but only Draco said "hello" to Astoria. He didn't know her well, but he would always speak to her whenever he saw her around.

Daphne had launched into a speech about how she'd been invited back to Hogwarts, and Theodore told her the three of them were also to return. Daphne had raised her eyebrows and glanced at Draco, obviously surprised that he was asked to attend for an eighth year.

"Pansy's coming back, you know?" she said to Draco. He groaned in response and took a drag on his cigarette. "This is what stress does to you," he found himself thinking, again.

"Maybe you two could finally sort things -"

"Sorry, not going to happen," Draco interjected. He had liked Pansy once, but nowhere near as much as she'd liked him. He had finished with her because their relationship just didn't seem to have a meaning.

"Daph, have you seen how exhausted this guy has been looking lately?" Blaise said, nodding towards Draco. "He needs _rest_ and that is _not _something he would get with Pansy. The girl's a complete sex addict, for god's sake!"

Draco laughed and looked up at Daphne, who was smiling. He caught eyes with Astoria, accidentally, and was surprised to find himself feeling a little awkward talking about such matters in front of her.

"Okay, okay," Daphne held her hands up, mockingly. "I've never known a guy who would complain about that but if Draco can't handle it -"

"He can't," Draco confirmed, still trying not to laugh. He reached out his arm, stubbing his cigarette out in the ash tray and glanced up towards Astoria. She was staring at the Dark Mark which he had exposed without even thinking about it. He quickly drew back his arm, subconsciously rubbing the inked skull with his right hand. He felt uncomfortable to say the least. Astoria looked up at his face and their eyes met for a second time. Draco tried, but could not hold her gaze; he was ashamed of letting her see his Mark so flippantly, no matter how faded it was.

"So, Draco, I heard you've moved into a place of your own now?" Daphne said. Draco felt all eyes were on him and kept his left arm close to his body.

"Yeah, yeah, that's right," Draco told her. "Not too far from here actually."

"Well, look at you, quite the grown up man," Daphne teased, but she was smiling. She'd always had a bit of a soft spot for Draco, as a friend.

"You'd be surprised Daph, I can even cook now. No need for an elf in my house!"

Daphne laughed, but Draco noticed she was also looking slightly impressed.

"Well, if any of us has a sudden death wish come over them, one day, we'll know where to come, eh Draco?"

Everyone laughed, and Draco said something about Daphne being a 'cheeky cow,' although he was laughing too. He found himself looking at Astoria again, and was relieved to see that she was laughing, too. He relaxed inwardly. He had been worried that the Dark Mark had made her scared to be in his company, but it can't have if she was laughing so freely. He actually thought how pretty she looked, but didn't hold the thought for long. He wasn't expecting to get very far with girls now, at least for the time being.

"Anyway," Daphne said. "We'd better be going, we have Ria's school things to buy for next year." She looked around at her sister, who was still standing behind her, and pulled her into a hug. Astoria looked embarrassed. "See you on September the first, boys."

"Bye," they all responded in unison, as the two Slytherin sisters walked away.

"Bye, Astoria," Draco chanced saying, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable.

Astoria looked back at Draco. "See you soon," she said to him.

Draco smiled at her, which she returned immediately. Their eyes lingered on each other for a few seconds, before Astoria turned away again. Draco couldn't tell whether she felt comfortable with him or not, and found himself really wishing that she did.

Not long after Daphne and Astoria had left, Draco saw Pansy amongst the crowd. She was heading in their general direction.

"Shit!" he hissed, leaving his seat and crouching down underneath their small, round table.

"What the...?" Blaise said, utterly bemused.

Theodore snorted, he knew there was only one reason Draco would attempt at hiding himself under a table.

"He must have seen Pansy," he informed Blaise, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

Blaise laughed as he heard Draco mutter "I need a cigarette," from underneath their table.

"He had good reason to hide mind, look, she's coming over," Theodore said. "Button up Malfoy, she's coming!" he added, warningly.

"You haven't seen me. Or if you have, I've gone. God I wish I had Potter's cloak right now!" Draco mumbled.

"Hey!" Pansy said, when she reached their table. Her voice was just as annoying as Draco had remembered it to be. Yes, he had, at one point, actually liked her. But that voice? Never.

"Hi, Pansy. Good summer?" Theo asked her, trying to keep the image of Draco trying to hide almost six feet of himself underneath the table out of his head for fear of laughing in Pansy's face.

"I ran into Daphne back there, she said Draco was with you guys..." Pansy said, totally ignoring Theo's question.

"He was," Blaise told her, quickly. "He was very much here, but he just left, love. Said he had some stuff to sort at his new place. We have been sat her for quite a while, we were probably boring him."

"Oh," Pansy said, her face falling. "Never mind. I guess I'll be seeing plenty of him when we're back at Hogwarts." She smiled widely at this thought. The hidden Draco, however, did not.

"Oh, you certainly will," Blaise said, catching Theodore's eye and smirking. Draco punched him in the shin. "Ow!" Blaise yelled, clutching his leg. Pansy gave him a weird look.

"Cramp..." Blaise said, smiling through gritted teeth.

"Right," Pansy said, raising an eyebrow. "Anyway, I'd better go. I have a lot to get sorted before our return to school. I have to say, I wasn't expecting it one bit. See you when we're back."

The two boys said goodbye to Pansy and she turned, flicking her hair impressively, and left.

Draco waited until he knew it was safe to come out from his hiding place. He hit his head on the table as he climbed out from underneath and swore under his breath. He dropped back into his seat and made a conscious decision to leave right after he'd smoked his third cigarette of the day. He deeply appreciated how Blaise and Theo were chatting, attempting to act as though the last three or four minutes had not happened.

"Boys I'm heading back to mine after this one," he said, raising the cigarette to his lips. He took and drag and said "Do you fancy coming back to mine, we could get some food in, a few fire whiskeys, make a night of it?"

Draco had loved having company again. In the back of his mind, he was worrying about how people were going to accept his return to Hogwarts. Having his friends around him made him realise it could be a lot worse than he imagined it was going to be, even if he did have to endure Pansy for another year.

"I'm game," Blaise said. He'd witnessed Draco fall apart over the last two years, and was genuinely glad to see that he was finally doing alright.

"I've got a family do tonight, mate, sorry," Theodore said. "My aunt's birthday, and yes it _will _be the end of the world if I didn't turn up." He grimaced.

Draco thought about his own aunt, Bellatrix. It would have been her birthday next week, if she hadn't have died. She wasn't big on birthday celebrations anyway so Draco decided not to dwell. And besides, she had been the one trying to push him into things he didn't want to do, along with his father.

"No worries," Draco said. "I'll send a quick owl to Pucey when we get to mine, he'll definitely be up for it."

Draco considered inviting Goyle. After all, he had taken Crabbe's death the worst out of all of them, but Draco felt a slight twinge of guilt knowing Goyle hadn't been asked back to Hogwarts, so decided not to invite him this time.

"Hey, if you invite Daphne and her sister, I'd definitely consider giving my aunt's party a miss," Theo said. "My god, the things I would do to those sist-"

"Shut up, Nott!" Draco snapped. "They're girls, not pieces of meat."

He glared at Theo across the table, and Theo smirked back at him.

"Oh, alright then, Malfoy, which one of them is it that you fancy?"

"Neither of them," Draco said, angrily. "But that's my friend and her little sister so just keep your disgusting little thoughts in your mind, yeah?"

"Shit, Malfoy. What has being a Death Eater done to you? Stolen your sense of humour? Or turned you into a soft twat?" Theodore taunted.

Draco stood up, shoving his cigarettes and lighter into his pocket. He didn't care to discuss _what being a Death Eater had done to him_, especially with Theodore Nott. If he made any more snide comments, dear Theo was likely to get a punch on the nose. Draco tucked his chair under the table in silence, and made his way towards the bustle of the Alley.

"Nice one, Nott. Bloody nice one!" Blaise said, scornfully, and followed Draco. He was looking forward to going round Draco's tonight. They had had such a laugh together in fifth year but after that Draco hadn't been such a barrel of laughs. Blaise was hoping things would get back to normal now but Theodore reminding Draco of his mistakes every day was certainly not going to help matters.

Draco was marching angrily through the crowd, Blaise had to jog slightly to keep up. When he finally reached him, they were at the stone wall. Draco looked round at Blaise.

"If only that prick knew what I'd been through -" he broke off. He'd said enough.

"Draco, what?" Blaise urged him to keep talking. Draco turned away from him.

"Nothing, forget it."


	4. Three: A Familiar Journey

CHAPTER THREE: _A Familiar Journey_

Draco and Blaise apparated straight into Draco's house. Blaise walked around slowly, taking in the place while Draco headed straight for the kitchen. This room was particularly one of his favourites. A centre unit stood in the middle, which was where he liked to prepare his food. Granite worktops and cupboards of beechwood lined the back and right hand walls, with a large window to the left. It was light and spacious and Draco loved it.

Blaise had made his way into the kitchen and raised his eyebrows at Draco.

"Nice place, man," he said.

"It's quite small," Draco admitted. The house comprised of a kitchen and sitting room downstairs, and two bedrooms, a bathroom and minuscule study upstairs. "Compared to what we're used to anyway. But I wanted something much smaller. I don't want a big house all to myself, I don't know how mother stands it."

"Yeah, mine as well," Blaise agreed. The Zabini household wasn't quite Malfoy Manor but it was very large and when Blaise was away his mother lived there alone. His father, and his mother's two husbands after him, had died.

Draco walked over to one of his kitchen cupboards, bent down and withdrew a bottle of fire whiskey.

"Crack this open, while I write a note to Pucey," Draco said, handing Blaise the bottle.

Many hours later, Draco, Blaise and Adrian Pucey were sat in Draco's living room with the bottle of fire whiskey near empty and their stomachs full of delicious food Draco had had delivered from a restaurant that had opened down Diagon Alley. Besides eating and drinking they had spent their time playing gobstones (competitively) and talking about the year ahead of them. Draco had spent a large proportion of their chat venting his issues with Pansy's return to Hogwarts.

"I don't even see why she's allowed to go back. She didn't do badly because of her exams, she did badly because there's not a lot upstairs," he had said. He was always a but brutal with his tongue with alcohol inside of him.

"To be honest, mate, I don't know why I was asked back," Ad had said, truthfully. "Yeah, I did bad, but nothing to do with the war. Maybe they're just asking everyone back that did badly because they don't want it to reflect on how the school looks to the other schools."

Draco and Blaise had nodded in agreement.

"Right, I'm off to bed," Draco announced, after being beaten at exploding snap by Adrian for a third time in a row.

"You always were a sore loser, Malfoy," Ad said, winking. Draco scowled.

"Anyway. You can stay round if you want, do whatever you like. There's a spare bed upstairs and the sofa's not too bad. If you don't stay, see you on the train, I guess."

"Night," Blaise and Ad said in unison, and Draco made his way upstairs.

When Draco reached the comfort of his bedroom, he allowed himself to fall backwards onto his bed. The room was decorated fairly plainly. The carpet was beige, the walls and soft furnishings a dull green. Hanging above Draco's bed was a Slytherin banner he had had since he first played for the Quidditch team in his second year. He turned his head to his right, where two photos stood in frames. One was of him, Blaise, Adrian and Daphne on a night out between their fifth and sixth year. It had been taken just before Draco's initiation as a Death Eater, and was the last time he remembered being so carefree. The second was a photo of him and Pansy, taken by the lake during their fifth year. Draco was leaning against a tree, with Pansy resting between his legs, looking up at him. Pansy had made him happy, once, but when he'd being going through a particularly hard time he hadn't ever felt Pansy was a person he could confide in. Their relationship had been mainly physical, which he had loved at first, but as he had matured, he had craved something more than meaningless sex. Sure, it had meant something to Pansy but not to him. Not really.

Draco frowned, and rolled nearer to the photographs. He took the one of him and Pansy, considered it for ten seconds, then shoved it inside the drawer of his bedside table. He didn't see any need to have this photograph in his room any longer. In fact, he didn't know why he had it there in the first place.

He hoisted himself off of the bed, changing into his pyjama bottoms and then climbing back under the covers. He closed his eyes, and thought about the way Pansy used to look at him. She had loved him, in a first crush kind of way, there was no doubt about it. He wondered whether any girl could ever love him again, now everybody knew what he used to be. He tried telling himself it didn't matter, but deep down he _wanted _to feel loved. He wanted to love someone and be loved in return by someone that wasn't his mother. But he decided, as he fell to sleep, that he would definitely keep that information to himself.

The next week or so passed quickly. Draco spent his last days of summer doing only three things: getting his things ready for his return to Hogwarts, visiting his mother, and getting himself into a daily fitness routine which consisted mainly of sit-ups. He really wanted his body back to the way it had been in fifth year, before he had lost all that weight.

Before Draco knew it, September the first had arrived. He awoke at eight forty-five with a feeling in his stomach which he took to be nerves. He got out of bed, showered and dressed, and made his way down to the kitchen where he made himself a coffee and fruit salad for breakfast. He ate slowly, scanning the Daily Prophet at leisure, then returned to his bedroom to check that he hadn't forgotten anything. He was quite obsessive over packing, and must have checked the list he'd written about twelve times before he sat down on the end of his bed and stared at his trunk. His eagle own, Agon, sat in his cage on top of the trunk. Draco had named the owl Agon because it was short for the Greek word 'agonistis,' meaning 'fighter.' Agon hooted and Draco smiled. The owl had served him well, he had had him since his first year at Hogwarts.

Draco stood and left his room, entering every other in the house to check he had closed all the windows and doors. With a flick of his wand, the kitchen was tidy. There was little he hated more than coming home to an untidy house. He went back upstairs to collect his things, and with that, apparated to a place just around the corner from Kings Cross station.

He checked his watch. He still had twenty five minutes until the train left. With a sigh, he lifted Agon in his cage, grabbed the handle of his trunk and made his way into the station. Thankfully, he hadn't seen anyone who was on his mental list, yet. The mental list comprised of people he knew would be queuing up to have a go at him. He'd rather not have to face this but he was prepared. He was rather surprised that he made all the way through the station to the barrier platform nine and three quarters without any hassle.

Draco tackled the barrier quickly, striding towards it, vanishing through to the other side. He made his way round the corner, looking behind him incase Blaise or any of the others were around. He should have been concentrating because he walked straight into someone. He turned around, abruptly, to find himself face to face with Astoria, Daphne's sister.

"Sorry, Astoria!" he said, flushing a dull red. "I was... I should've been..."

"It's fine," Astoria said. She gave him a small smile. "Blaise and Theo are with Daphne, I'll take you over."

"I, err, thanks," Draco stuttered. God, he was making himself look like a first class idiot. He pushed through the crowd as Astoria lead the way to where her sister was. As they got close she pointed in their direction.

"They're there," she said, looking at Draco to check he was paying attention this time.

"Thanks, Astoria. Aren't you staying?" he added, as she started to walk back in the direction they had came from. He tried to keep the disappointment from his voice. Disappointment that he didn't even pinpoint the reason for.

"Oh, no, I'm going to find my friends," Astoria said, hurriedly. Noticing the slight trace of disappointment in Draco's voice she said "I'll come by later, though." She smiled again. She couldn't believe Draco was starting to pay her attention now. She'd liked him for nearly three years, although her feelings had changed somewhat when she found out he was a Death Eater. Changed, but never quite disappeared.

"Ok, well, see you later then," Draco said, feeling his heart lift. _Where _were these feelings coming from? First, he didn't want Astoria to feel scared by him in Diagon Alley, now he was stumbling over his words when he spoke to her. Draco wasn't in the right frame of mind for mental debates with himself, so he watched Astoria push her way through the crowd, then joined her sister and his friends. It was Theodore who approached him first.

"Malfoy, sorry about what I said, the other day. I was just joking and took it a bit too far, sorry mate."

Draco noticed the sincerity in his voice and so decided to let it drop, this time, making a promise to himself not to take anymore bullshit off of Theodore this year. Sometimes they got along well, but Draco often felt like he wanted to hex Theodore into next week.

"Don't worry about it," he said coolly. Theo gave him a friendly slap on the back which Draco did not return.

The small group of eighth year Slytherins stood on the platform talking for a few minutes before boarding the Hogwarts Express together. The only person missing was Pansy, which Draco couldn't deny being slightly relieved about. He got no pleasure out of having to explain to her that he dumped her at the end of sixth year every time he saw her. The five took a compartment together, Draco seating himself next to the window. The train had only been moving a few minutes when the compartment door slid open. Pansy. Draco knew his luck wouldn't last long.

"Hi!" she said, as enthusiastic as ever. Without being invited to sit with them, she perched herself in between Draco and Adrian. "Draco, it's so good to see you. I hope your summer was ok?" She continued talking, giving him no time to answer. "I was so sorry to hear about your aunt. And your dad." She peered at him as though expecting him to cry on her shoulder.

"Don't be," he said bluntly, turning to stare out of the window.

"Oh, so I take it you're okay then?" she asked.

"I'm fine, Pans," was all he said in response. Maybe if he carried on like this, she'd get the message. Then again, probably not.

"Well, lovely to see you guys, sorry I can't stay longer. See you at dinner." She took Draco's hand and gave it a squeeze before leaving the compartment.

"Draco," Daphne said, in a tone his mother would use. "You didn't have to make it _so _obvious you don't want to talk to her." Blaise, Theo and Adrian all snorted with laughter.

"Honestly, Daphne, I thought that was quite tactful for him," Adrian grinned.

"Watch it Pucey, my sides will split, you're so god damn funny," Draco said, sourly. He turned to face them. "I know I'm going to get a lot of shit this year from people who don't think I should be here. I don't have the energy to deal with Pansy, too."

Daphne looked at him with raised eyebrows but her expression was soft. Draco looked at her.

"How come she left so quickly? She doesn't normally give in so easily," he said slowly.

"I had a word with her before we came," Daphne confessed, feeling a little awkward.

Draco continued to look at her, his expression a mixture of confusion and gratitude.

"She is my friend, Draco, but she needs to let go sometime," Daphne said. "I just gave her a bit of encouragement."

Draco slumped back in his seat, relieved. "Seriously, Daph, if whatever you said has worked, I owe you big time!"

Daphne smiled but said "She's my friend though, don't be too hard on her. She really cared about you..."

Draco sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I know she did."

For a few hours the train journey remained fairly uneventful, apart from a small group of Hufflepuffs catching sight of Draco, looking anxious, and leaving promptly. Shortly after that, their door slid open once again. Draco didn't notice until he heard Astoria's voice.

She had sat down opposite him, next to Daphne. He looked at her, wanting to say something but knowing he would just end up looking stupid again.

"Hey," Astoria said, her voice soft. Her smile was small, yet warming.

"Hey," Draco said, trying too hard to sound casual. "Did you find your friends?"

"Yes, I did thank you."

Draco found himself wishing he'd asked her something which required more of an answer. Now he just felt slightly awkward, a feeling he was becoming accustomed to around this girl. This confused him. A lot. He couldn't have feelings for her, he didn't know her well enough. But why else would he care so much about the way he came across? He'd never felt this with any other girl he'd liked. Again, not in the mood for mental debates or self psycho analysing. He was trying to think of something interesting to say, anything, when Astoria started chatting to her sister about her friend Albany's new obsession with some famous Quidditch player. Draco relaxed, glad he didn't have to fill the silence, although wishing he'd had the ability to.

Astoria stayed with them for the remainder of the journey. Every so often, Draco would look over at her and she would catch his eye, smiling whenever she did so. Draco would always return the smile, then stare blankly at the floor or out of the window at the growing darkness.

Eventually everyone in the compartment was dressed in their robes and the train was crawling to a stand still at Hogsmeade station. Draco still hadn't received any bother and wondered how long his luck was going to last. He retrieved Daphne's and Astoria's trunks from the luggage rack and then his own and the group of Slytherins made their way out onto the platform. Draco felt uncomfortable as many people stared at him, but he had to get used to that. It was bound to happen. That was when he heard a voice, loud enough to reach his ears over the chatter and excitement of younger students.

"What the hell is _he _doing back?!"

Draco turned and saw Ron Weasley glaring at him through the crowd, Potter and Granger at his side. They didn't seem too bothered that he was back at Hogwarts, it was only Weasley making a fuss. Granger stood on tip toes and said something into Weasley's ear, Draco forcing himself to keep looking at them. Weasley was shaking his head at Granger's words.

"You should be in Azkaban!" Weasley shouted, obviously getting too big for his boots. Still Draco said nothing.

Astoria had turned around at the word 'Azkaban' and stood by Draco's side. Draco noticed her looking at Weasley, and as she stood there, he became worried she shared Weasley's opinion.

"They shouldn't be letting murdering scum back into the school!"

"Leave him alone!" Astoria yelled back, suddenly. Draco looked at her, totally shocked. "He went through trial like everyone else! He has every right to be here!"

When Draco looked back at the trio, Potter was gripping Weasley's arm and was pulling him away in the direction of the carriages. He didn't speak, but when they passed, Draco was sure he saw sympathy in Potter's eyes. He felt appreciative of him dragging Weasley off but he had no desire for Potter to feel sympathy towards him.

Draco looked around at Astoria to thank her but she was already making her way towards the carriages. Blaise appeared next to him.

"What just happened?" he asked.

"Nothing, let's just go," Draco said, slightly downhearted that Astoria had left so abruptly after sticking up for him. He and Blaise made their way along the platform, the rest of the group way up ahead. They hopped into the first carriage they spotted, along with some Slytherin boys who were two years below them.

"... with you and Tori?" one said. Draco's heart skipped a beat, realising the boy meant Astoria.

"She finished things, beginning of summer," another replied. "She said I was immature and thoughtless." The boy scowled at the floor of the carriage while the other lads drew breaths and sniggered.

"At least she's honest..." the guy closest to Draco mumbled under his breath. The conversation was now over, and the rest of the journey passed in silence. The younger Slytherins hadn't even acknowledged Draco's presence in their company.

Draco felt many pairs of eyes upon him as he made his way down the Great Hall with Blaise towards a space at the Slytherin table along with the rest of the eighth years. Thankfully, Weasley had refrained from making any more comments. He sat down, his eyes scanning the staff table. It was weird not seeing Snape there. His eyes lingered on McGonagall and she looked across at him, inclining her head and giving him small smile. He knew she would want to speak to him before his classes began but, in all honesty, this probably wasn't a bad thing.

The sorting passed swiftly, Draco clapping every single child that got sorted rather than those who were placed into Slytherin alone. Soon the feast began. Draco looked down the table and saw Astoria deep in conversation with her friends. She looked so happy. Maybe it was something to do with not having an immature and thoughtless boyfriend, Draco thought to himself.

He spent most of the feast in silence, listening to the usual banter between his friends. Despite what people thought of him, it was good to be back. He found himself settling into bed that night, content. There was one thing, one person, Draco was sure could make him more than content but he tried his best to put Astoria to the back of his mind. Was there a chance that a girl like Astoria would be interested in a guy like him? Not a chance in hell...


	5. Four: Ahead to the Future

CHAPTER FIVE: _Ahead to the Future_

Draco was sat in the Great Hall with Blaise and Daphne the next morning when he received a letter, half way through eating his cereal. He untied the parchment from the owl's leg and read the letter, which confirmed what he had been expecting.

_Mr Malfoy,_

_As you may expect, there are matters to discuss concerning your return to Hogwarts. Please come to my office as soon as you have finished breakfast, this morning._

_Regards,_

_Professor M McGonagall_

Draco finished his last few mouthfuls of cereal and rose from the table just as Astoria had arrived to speak to her sister.

"Where are you going?" Daphne asked. "Hey." she added, as her younger sister sat down.

"McGonagall wants me in her office. See you later."

And with that, he strode out of the Great Hall heading in the direction of McGonagall. Only when he reached her office door did he realise he hadn't bothered to acknowledge Astoria when she arrived. "Shit," he thought to himself. Then he considered things - maybe it was better not to speak to her too much. He didn't want her thinking he had some school boy crush on her. He shook himself out of his thoughts and knocked McGonagall's door.

"Come in," came her curt voice from within the office.

Draco pushed open the door, hesitated for a second, and then entered McGonagall's office, closing the door behind him.

"Sit down, Mr Malfoy," she said, and he did as he was told. He had no idea what she wanted to speak to him about. Would she show anger? Sympathy, maybe?

"I heard about what happened yesterday on the platform," she informed him. Draco's only response was to clear his throat. "I can assure you Mr Weasley won't be bothering you again."

Draco stared at her. "Thank you," was all he managed in response, his face expressionless.

"You have been invited back to Hogwarts for a reason, Draco," McGonagall went on. "In my opinion, and correct me if I'm wrong, I do not believe you wished to play such a controversial role within the war. It is my belief that you had no choice but to become a Death Eater, is that correct?"

"Yes, Professor," Draco replied.

"I feel for you. It must have been a difficult situation. However, I do believe that you had a dangerous infatuation with the Dark Arts. Am I right in saying so?"

Draco hesitated. He had never thought of himself in this way.

"I suppose you could say that..." Draco said slowly, though he disagreed.

"And I trust that you no longer have this desire to be connected to anything with such negativity."

"No, Professor," Draco confirmed.

"Mr Malfoy, _talk to me_. I am trying my best to understand you here."

Draco paused for a few moments and then said "Okay... I don't feel I had an infatuation with the Dark Arts. If anything, they scared me. It's just that... my father, my aunt... He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named... I had all this pressure from so many different people. I don't... I don't feel I had any choice. If I had choice, this wouldn't have been what I'd chosen for myself."

"And now, Draco? What do you want now?" she urged.

"I want to graduate and I want to make something of myself. Nothing else," he answered truthfully.

McGonagall smiled slightly, watching him all the while, peering over the top of her glasses.

"And when you look ahead to the future. What do you see yourself doing?"

"I'd like to work for Nimbus," Draco told her. "I want to start at the bottom, and work my way up to the top. I know a lot about flying, charms, enchantments, things like that. Maybe I could work in quality control or something..." he trailed off.

"You are a clever young man, Mr Malfoy. You will achieve anything you want to achieve as long as you make the most of this chance you have been given."

"Thank you for the opportunity, Professor. Not many people would've given me a second chance."

"Now, now. Everyone makes mistakes. I think you're a good person, Mr Malfoy. Perhaps one could say, misunderstood? That is why you were able to return this year. Just do me one favour." She paused as Draco looked at her. "Work hard."

"I will, Professor," Draco promised. He had no intention of wasting this chance. Everything that had ever stopped him from being himself now stood clearly out of his way.

"Very well, which subjects are you taking at NEWT, please remind me?"

"Potions, arithmancy, charms, transfiguration and defence against the dark arts," Draco recited.

"And remind me of your OWL grades, please."

"Four Os, two Es and a P," Draco recalled. Well, he was never going to pass care of magical creatures, was he?

"Thank you, Mr Malfoy. You may leave now," McGonagall said, handing him his new timetable. He scanned it, finding out that he was due in defence against the dark arts at present. Draco stood to leave, and when he reached the door Mcgonagall said "And Draco." He turned. "You will be assisting with coaching the Slytherin Quidditch team this year. We don't normally have such a position but I feel it's appropriate to engage you with something positive, especially as you can no longer play as part of the team."

"Thanks, Professor," Draco said, smiling, and with that he left.

Draco made his way briskly towards the dungeons to collect his things for class. There was still plenty left of defence class and he wasn't going to start skipping classes on the first day. He'd missed enough lessons in sixth year to earn himself an O in skiving. Once in his dormitory, he threw his books, quill and parchment into his bag and made his way to the classroom.

He knocked the door before entering, and quietly pushed it open. His palms were sweating slightly, he was scared of having to make an entrance when everyone else was already settled. It was an unnecessary reason for all eyes to be on him.

The new teacher, Professor Prezlock, glanced up from his desk towards the back of the classroom.

"Ah, Malfoy, is it?" he said jovially, checking the register. The whole class turned to stare at Draco who felt his face burning.

"Yes, sir," Draco said, spotting Blaise and hurrying in the direction of the empty seat next to him.

"Yes, take a seat my boy, let's just hope you won't be late again."

"I won't be, sir," Draco said, extracting his things from his bag.

"How'd it go?" Blaise mumbled.

"Later..." Draco said under his breath. "What page?"

The lesson went well. It didn't take Draco long to catch up on what he had missed and when it came to the written quiz at the end of the two hour class, only Granger scored a better mark than he did.

Draco and Blaise made their way down to the Slytherin common room for their free period after defence against the dark arts and, upon their arrival, were joined by Daphne and Pansy, who had been very underwhelming since Daphne had had words with her on Draco's behalf. Draco was more than thankful.

Draco was telling them about his chat with McGonagall - how she described him as having an infatuation with the Dark Arts and how she had made him Slytherin team coach.

"Oh, good for you!" Daphne said when he told them the latter.

"Yeah, nice one mate," Blaise said. "That'll look good when you're looking for a job, first Hogwarts Quidditch coach ever."

Draco inclined his head in agreement. He looked across at Pansy, who hadn't said much. Daphne had got her to talk less, but she obviously hadn't attempted to convince her not to stare at him. She looked away quickly when Draco's eyes met hers.

Daphne leant up off of the sofa, looking around for her sister. She was sat at the large study table across the room, parchment everywhere.

"Ria," Daphne called. "Come here."

Astoria looked over, rolled her eyes and made her way over to the sofas where the four eighth year Slytherins now sat in silence.

"Did you manage to sort your timetable?" Daphne asked her.

"Oh, yeah," Astoria said vaguely. "I dropped astrology. I liked it but it wasn't really useful. I'm doing arithmancy, charms, potions, defence and transfiguration now."

"Same subjects as me," Draco blurted out before he could stop himself. Daphne and Pansy both momentarily gave him confused looks due to his apparent happiness at studying the same subjects as Astoria. Astoria herself looked at him, blushing slightly.

"Well there you go, Ria," Daphne said matter-of-factly. "You've found yourself a study friend. Draco's dead clever, actually."

Draco coughed to mask his feeling of awkwardness and Astoria looked a little embarrassed although she was smiling.

"Thanks for the genius idea, Daph but -"

"I'm sure she's smart enough to not need my help," Draco finished Astoria's sentence.

"Well I was going to say I'm sure you don't have the time to be helping me..." Astoria said bluntly.

Draco's mind went into overload. Did this mean she would want him to help her with her work? Her only worry was that he wouldn't have the time for her, that had to be a good sign.

Blaise and Daphne laughed at Draco's embarrassment, while Pansy looked nothing but a little mortified. Draco didn't normally behave this way towards girls, let alone those two years younger than himself.

"Umm, I'm sure I could, er, find the time if you needed me," Draco told Astoria, pathetically. "Although I'm not as smart as your sister seems to think I am."

"Shut up," Daphne screeched. "The only person who was better than you in our year was that Granger!"

"Right, I have stuff to do," Astoria said quietly. "So, see you guys later."

She started to leave and then turned and said cheerfully "I'll let you know when I'm struggling, Draco, I'm sure it won't be too long."

Draco looked at her, surprised. She had so much more confidence than he did.

"Yeah, sure," he said, staring after her as he left. "See you."

"Oh, put your tongue in, Draco!" Pansy snapped, and with that she stood abruptly and left, heading in the direction of her dormitory.

"Shit, what's up with her," Blaise said when Pansy was out of earshot.

Daphne gave him a look which seemed to be saying 'how do you not know?'. "I think she was a bit upset over her ex flirting with someone else in front of her face." She raised her eyebrows at Draco.

"What?!" Draco exclaimed defensively. "I was not flirting with your sister! _You _were the one suggesting we should meet up in our free time! How does that make _me _a flirt?"

"Okay," Daphne said. "Not flirting, but it's so obvious you like her, you're so coy around her. You're not normally like that..."

"I do not fancy your little sister," Draco said with an air of finality. Daphne smiled smugly.

"If you say so," she muttered, inspecting her fingernails.

The next few days passed uneventfully. Draco got on with classes and received little bother from other students. He was exasperated that things were now somewhat awkward between him and Pansy (could she ever just accept him as a friend?) but he decided he would much prefer things awkward than for her to be following him around school like a lost puppy.

Draco had just sat down at the Slytherin table to grab himself a quick lunch before his first Quidditch coaching session when Theodore came striding into the hall. He seemed to be somewhat pleased with himself, and when Draco saw he was striding in his direction, he didn't think he could be about to say anything he was remotely interested in listening to.

Theo plonked himself down next to Draco and grabbed a pumpkin pasty.

"Guess who's tagging along with us next week?" Theo challenged Draco, who raised his eyebrows in response as if to say "what are you talking about?"

"Hogsmeade," Theo replied to Draco's silent question. "We're all going together, remember?"

"Oh," Draco said, though he couldn't care less. "I dunno."

"Daphne's sister." Theo said. Draco tried to remain impassive and kept his expression neutral. "I've heard you've got a bit of a thing for her."

"No, I don't!" Draco snapped. "Why does everyone keep saying that? I barely know the girl and she's my friend's sister."

Theo smirked. "Well, if it's Daphne you're worried about, she's not bothered. She said it's about time Astoria found herself a decent boyfriend."

Draco snorted. "Yeah, and I'm really the kind of guy to be considered decent, aren't I?" he said sarcastically.

"Oh, come on. Before all that _stuff _most girls here would of given their right arm to go out with you. You used to say so yourself."

Draco cringed slightly. He recalled once saying that. It wasn't the sort of thing he would say nowadays, and it made him feel uncomfortable that he used to be such an arrogant dick. He finished eating his pasty.

"Well, I don't think that any more. You say _stuff _like maybe I've cheated occasionally or something. Not that simple is it, mate. I'm branded a murdered for life. Not quite the same..."

"You didn't kill anyone though!" Theodore exclaimed loudly. A few students enjoying their lunches looked around at them. Draco turned slightly pink.

"No, but not everyone knows that do they?" he said as Theo stood to leave, pasty in hand.

"Astoria does," was all he said, and with that he gave Draco a slap on the back and left.

Draco let out a low groan of exasperation as Theo walked away. How did Theo know exactly what buttons to press to get him wound up? The one thing Draco couldn't understand was why everyone was so sure he had some kind of feelings for Astoria. All he did was talk to her on occasion. He didn't even flirt with her like he would have done so ruthlessly a few years ago if he'd liked her then. They just exchanged a few words every now and again.

Downing the rest of his pumpkin juice, Draco stood, grabbed his broom and headed in the direction of the Quidditch pitch, where he found the Slytherin team flying some warm up laps. The keeper, Mason Lozier indicated Draco's arrival to the others as Draco made his way onto the pitch, which was bathed in a weak sunlight but was still cold. They all flew to land immediately and gathered around Draco who had brought his older broom, the Nimbus 2001, along with him. Some of the players looked tense, particularly Scarlett Sevier, the first girl to ever make the Slytherin Quidditch team.

"Right," Draco said, to get everyone's attention. The muttering died down. "I think, if we're going to work together this year, I should be totally honest with you." The team glanced around at each other apprehensively, then looked back at Draco.

"I'm Draco Malfoy. You probably know me. I was made a Death Eater two years ago," he rolled up the sleeve of his Quidditch robes to show them his faded Mark. "Not through my own choice, but still, I was a complete asshole." A couple of the players sniggered and Draco shook his sleeve back down. "I was sent for trial where I was cleared of all charges. You have to know that I did not kill anyone. I don't want anyone to be scared of me." He paused for many seconds. "So now, I've come back here to change that around and that's why I'll be training with you this year. I'll work with you every week. I'll keep you in line, I'll make sure you're doing it right but most importantly I'll make you winners. I will work my ass off and I'm going to make you lot the best Quidditch team Hogwarts has ever seen."

There was a silence across the pitch when Draco had finished his words. Then, suddenly, the team started to clap. Draco reveled in it.

"So," he bellowed. "Are we gunna train hard to be the best we can be!?"

"Yeah!" the other Slytherins yelled back.

"Are we gunna show Gryffindor that we are completely and utterly unbeatable in the first match this season!?"

"Hell yeah!" shouted the Slytherins.

"And are we gunna take that cup at the end of the year and hold it so high above our heads that all the other teams feel sick to their stomachs!?"

"Hell motherfuckin yeah!" the Slytherins boomed.

There was a lot of clapping and yelling and chanting for the next minute or so. Draco's attitude had become infectious. He had never helped Slytherin to victory when he was a member of the team but he sure as hell wasn't going to see them beaten now he was a coach.

"Right then! Let's get to work!"


	6. Five: The Three Broomsticks

CHAPTER SIX: _The Three Broomsticks_

When Draco arrived back in the Slytherin common room late in the afternoon, he felt ready to sleep. It had been a long time since he had trained and he was definitely feeling the effects. He had decided to get stuck in with his coaching opportunity and join the team in training, almost as if he were an additional member, offering them advice and watching them closely from up in the air. Draco collapsed into an unoccupied armchair next to the burning fire and leant forward to warm his hands which were like blocks of ice after gripping his broomstick for an hour.

Draco was so happy that the training sessions went well. He had half been expecting the team to boycott, to tell him that they wouldn't take orders or advice from a death eater. But he'd been proven wrong - perhaps because of the speech he had made before the session started. Being open with them was the best thing he could have done. He was already looking forward to next week's training.

Lost in thought, Draco slumped back into the comfy leather seat and allowed his eyes to fall shut. After what seemed like a few moments, laughter and the mentioning of his name forced Draco to open his eyes again. Blaise, Theo and Adrian were all gathered around him.

"What the...?" Draco said sleepily.

"Mate, you've been asleep there for nearly an hour," Adrian said, laughing. "We couldn't leave you there any longer!" The other guys laughed, too.

"Ahh, shit," Draco mumbled, eventually standing up.

"Training knackering mate?" Blaise said, clapping Draco on the back. Draco nodded and rubbed his eyes. Blaise leaned in closer to Draco and whispered "Astoria saw you sleeping there. She had a go at us for laughing at you."

"Not you as well," Draco groaned. "Can we just drop this Astoria thing, because I don't fancy her."

Blaise raised an eyebrow at him and then said "Okay, my friend."

The next ten days flew by with a pile of essays to write and before Draco knew it, it was the weekend again. As September came to a close, the weather turned decidedly chillier and so the Slytherin eighth years found themselves wrapping up warm for their trip to Hogsmeade. Draco was wondering what they would actually do in Hogsmeade - in their younger years it had been exciting to get out of the school and do their own thing. It was a novelty. Now Draco lived in a house of his own he found the whole thing a bit patronising. He had become accustomed to doing what he wanted, when he wanted, and now it was a case of being on day release from the castle.

Nevertheless, he pulled a jumper over his head, grabbed his coat and wrapped his scarf around his neck. A lot of people hated the cold weather but he didn't mind it. He left his dormitory and found Blaise, Theo, Daphne, Adrian and Pansy waiting for him in the common room, equally as wrapped up as he was.

"Let's go," he said, clapping his gloved hands together and heading towards the door.

"Wait, Ria isn't here yet!" Daphne said as the others started making their way towards the door to join Draco.

Pansy rolled her eyes and Adrian and Theo exchanged glances before looking around at Draco who had completely forgotten that Astoria was joining them. He glared at Adrian and Theo, noticing their sly looks. Daphne remained oblivious and Blaise chose to ignore the situation, as Draco had insisted he didn't have feelings for Astoria.

A few minutes later, Astoria joined them in the common room and Theo and Ad rose from the chairs they had slumped into out of boredom. Astoria went straight to her sister and they started chatting. Pansy walked with Theo and Ad and Draco and Blaise went ahead.

It was as cold outside as they'd been expecting, although the sun was shining through the gaps in the thick white clouds. A sharp wind hit Draco's face and he pulled his scarf up higher to protect himself. As they left the castle gates, Blaise joined Theo and Ad in an argument about the Quidditch league and Pansy was in deep conversation with Daphne about what Tracey Davis had been doing since she'd left school. Draco turned to see Astoria walking behind the group, looking a little left out. He hung back, deciding not to give a damn what anyone thought or said.

"Hey," he said, when she reached him.

"Hey, Draco." God, he loved it when she said his name. "How's the Quidditch coaching going?"

"Yeah, it's good thanks, really good," he told her. Finally, he seemed able to speak to her without turning into a stuttering idiot. "I thought maybe they would refuse to work with me but -" He noticed Astoria shivering. She hadn't wrapped up quite as warm as the rest of the group had. "Shit, you look frozen," Draco said worryingly, starting to unbutton his coat.

"I'm fine," Astoria insisted, noticing him unbuttoning his coat. "Seriously." But Draco had already taken his coat off.

"Take it," he ordered her, holding it out. Astoria looked apprehensively at him, then she broke into a warm smile. She looked so beautiful, her green eyes sparking in the weak sunlight. Draco smirked and placed his coat around her shoulders. He noticed how she immediately drew it around herself, trying to warm up.

"Thank you," she said, still smiling it him.

"No problem," Draco said, smiling back, and starting to walk quicker because he was now extremely cold.

They continued the rest of the journey chatting about how their lessons had been going so far. As they were taking the same subjects, they could have chatted for hours. Astoria quickly realised that her sister was right; Draco was very intelligent. She knew he was from one of the oldest pureblood families in history, but she hadn't actually realised how clever he was. Secretly, she was looking forward to asking Draco for his help one day. A chance to be alone with him. She just wished he felt the same way.

Just before they reached the Three Broomsticks, Daphne glanced around to check on her sister. Apparently, the boys hadn't even noticed Draco's absence from their company. Daphne tapped Blaise discretely on the elbow, he looked around and she nodded in the direction of Draco and Astoria, who were still at the back of the group. Blaise shot Daphne a knowing look and winked.

Daphne got up on tiptoes and whispered "Told you he likes her. He's given her his coat! _Not _a very Draco thing to do, is it?" Blaise shrugged in response.

"What are you whispering about?" Pansy asked Daphne. She had always had major insecurity issues about being out of the loop.

"Nothing important, Pans, relax!" Daphne lied. She often got fed up with Pansy, and had totally sympathised with Draco when he had been her boyfriend.

"Alright," Pansy said. "Where's Draco?" she added, suddenly, looking around and spotting him walking with Astoria. She took a few moments to consider the situation, taking in how Draco didn't take his eyes off Astoria as she spoke, how Astoria was smiling up at him, his coat wrapped tight around her. Inside, Pansy was screaming out for him. He was hers. She _loved _him. But, for once, she allowed her head to overrule her heart and she simply ignored them. She would move on one day, when she could face it.

Once they reached Hogsmeade, the group traipsed into the Three Broomsticks and made their way to a table next to the window. Much to Draco's amazement, he and Astoria were still immersed in conversation and so took seats next to each other. Every now and then a voice in the back of his head would say 'not a chance' or 'just don't think of her in that way.' Draco could deny his feelings to others easily, but he had a much harder time trying to deny them to himself. If he seriously considered it, he _knew _there was no chance of them every being more than friends. He was satisfied with being friends. Being friends was a lot better than nothing.

The Three Broomsticks was buzzing, especially with all the students who had come from the castle. Everyone in Draco's company were happily chatting away and so he asked Astoria if she wanted a drink. He ended up at the bar collecting two butterbeers and sitting back down to discuss care of magical creatures. Astoria had also taken it, but didn't quite share Draco's opinion.

"I loved it though," Astoria said. "But, I guess you're kind of right, it was a bit pointless..."

Draco pulled back the sleeve of his right arm to show her the scar from where the hippogriff had attacked him. "Yeah, pointless and always ending up in injury," he said, laughing.

"What did that?" Astoria asked, curiously.

"A hippogriff."

Astoria smirked. "You insulted it didn't you?" Draco looked shiftily to the side in response. "You did, didn't you?" she persisted.

"Perhaps, I might have, erm, said something..."

"Well, that was totally your own fault then," Astoria said, laughing at him. He laughed too, taking a sip of his butterbeer. Astoria looked at his arm again. "Did it make all of those scars?" she asked, suddenly.

Draco suddenly became very withdrawn, pulling his sleeve back down. "No," he said quickly. "That's from... other stuff," he said, shaking his head dismissively. Astoria looked up into his grey eyes and that's when she realised that Draco was hiding something. Something that was hurting him. She just couldn't tell what.


	7. Six: Not My Intention

CHAPTER SIX: _Not My Intention_

Draco thought about Astoria a hell of a lot over the next few days. He seriously had to snap out of it because he was absolutely certain she didn't have feelings for him. Why would she? The rest of their day in Hogsmeade last weekend had been pleasant. In fact, they had spent the majority of it just chatting to each other. There had definitely been some awkward moments, but it could be worse; Astoria could think him the scumbag death eater that so many others thought him. Thankfully, it appeared that she didn't, and fortunately there were no further accidental flashings of his dark mark as there had been in Diagon Alley. Nor had he thoughtlessly exposed any more scars to her that were attached to some pretty horrific memories. It wasn't difficult to hide scars on his chest, his back. The ones on his arms, his neck were a little more problematic. No-one had ever mentioned them before Astoria though, so he must have been hiding them pretty well.

Astoria had even joined him outside of the Three Broomsticks, when he left the cosy pub to smoke a cigarette. Draco knew that once they'd left, the rest of the Slytherins would be going mad with speculation but it didn't matter to him anymore. There was nothing going on with him and Astoria and there never would be. They were just becoming friends and the only reason she had followed him outside was because they were mid-debate over which teacher had been the best before the war when Draco had decided he needed his nicotine fix. Astoria found that she quite liked arguing with him, not many people put up as good a fight as he did. He was completely stubborn but not unfair.

Draco was tucking into his breakfast one morning when Agon arrived, landing right in front of him and hooting in admiration. Draco untied the letter, recognising his mother's handwriting immediately. It was fairly similar to his own, only neater. He opened the letter hastily and read it through.

_My Darling,_

_I went to visit your father yesterday. I expect you will be pleased to know he is well. It was really rather strange not having you there with me._

_Anyway, we were talking and he asked after you, how you were getting on now you were back at school and he seemed interested to know what you intended to do after school and so I told him exactly what you told me. I'm sorry to say this, Draco, but as you expected, he wasn't best pleased. I just thought I should write to warn you incase he attempts to get in contact with you about it._

_Whatever happens, you must know that I am proud of you and I will support you. Always._

_Write soon, darling._

_All my love,_

_Mum_

He read the letter several times, his heart thudding. When his mum had suggested that they told his father of his ambitions together Draco had been pleased because it meant the confrontation could have been delayed for as long as he felt necessary. It was too late now, she'd already told him. He knew it wouldn't have been her intention, but he was annoyed nevertheless.

He looked up from the letter and saw Pansy walking down the length of the table, alone. He quickly grabbed the letter and shoved it into his pocket. Out of sight, out of mind, he thought. Anyway, why should he give a damn about his father's opinion any more? He was in prison for life, Draco would have a much more successful life than him, whatever career path he chose.

Draco groaned to himself when he realised Pansy was heading to sit next to him. Maybe Daphne's words hadn't worked so well after all.

"Hey," Pansy said airily, sitting down next to him and grabbing herself a plate for some breakfast.

"Alright," Draco said, completely meaning to emphasise that he wasn't in the mood to chat.

"What's wrong, you look upset?" Pansy asked him.

Draco's brow furrowed. "I'm not upset," he told her. "Just pissed off, I suppose."

Pansy looked at him, her eyelashes fluttering. "Care to share?"

"Not really but thanks for the offer."

"Your loss," she said irritably. "Anyway, I've been thinking. We need to talk."

Draco glanced at her. He had expected to feel immediate annoyance but when he looked at her he actually felt a bit sympathetic. He had a sneaking suspicion that this 'talk' would turn out exactly the same as many other 'talks' they had had before now but maybe there was a way that he could make this the last one. Maybe, for once, he could just be honest with her.

"Okay," he agreed. "Yeah, you're right. We do need to talk."

Pansy was shocked. He didn't normally give in so easily. Last week in Hogsmeade she hadn't seen any evidence but now, just maybe he could still have feelings for her.

Draco stood to leave, he had classes soon. "Tonight, okay?" he said to her. She nodded and smiled at him. He didn't return the smile. "I'll see you in the common room."

That night, Draco and Pansy sat alone on a sofa together in the corner of the common room. It was late, they had a whole day of lessons tomorrow, and Draco could only hope this little chat wouldn't go on for too long. He waited for Pansy to speak first, he could sense she had a lot she needed to say to him, even though they had had many discussions concerning their relationship. But hopefully this one would get it over and done with for good. After a couple of minutes of waiting in silence, Pansy still hadn't spoken, she just remained sitting and starting at the stone floor.

"Pans, we came here to talk," Draco urged her. "I know you've got stuff to say so just say it."

Pansy looked round at him, an amount of sadness in her eyes. She waited a long whole before saying "Where did we go wrong, Draco?" She looked away again. Draco sighed deeply and flopped back onto the sofa. The only thing he could do now was be honest to the point of being slightly brutal. He knew this was going to end badly. It was the only way to prevent this from happening again a few months down the line.

"Pansy, listen to me," Draco said. He gently pulled her face round with his hand so she was looking at him. "We both have things we want to say to each other so let's just say them all, yeah?" She remained silent. "I'm not going to hold anything back now, and I don't want you to, either. Okay?" Pansy nodded, keeping her eyes on him after he had withdrawn his hand.

"Who do you want to go first?" Draco said, softly. The last thing he wanted was to argue so he adapted a much gentler approach than he would have done a couple of years ago. He had grown up, a lot.

"You," Pansy said, though she sounded worried. Draco cleared his throat and kept his voice quiet. It wasn't a conversation he wished for anyone to overhear for both of their sakes.

"Okay," Draco began. "This is my way of seeing things... We had some kind of feelings for each other from such a young age. Like, thirteen? It was great, Pansy, what we had was good. When we were young." She was watching him intently and he was trying to word things carefully. He couldn't hack it if she cried, he didn't know if he had the patience. "I'm not saying we didn't have some really good times. And the reason I broke up with you in sixth year - well, you know why. I had serious shit going on, Pansy. _Serious _shit. A relationship was the last thing on my mind whether it be with you or anybody. That was a tough year for me and in the end..." He broke off, not knowing whether to say what was on his mind or not. But Pansy spoke before he got a chance.

"But that's over now. We were in love, Draco. We could have tried. We _could _try again." Draco disagreed, but kept his mouth shut. If he told her he'd never loved her it would destroy her. He couldn't do that. "When we were together I didn't think about anything else. When we made love it was like -"

"Wha - wait. Pansy, we were kids," he couldn't bite his tongue at these words. "I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but we didn't make love. We shagged. We fucked. We did not make love."

Pansy's eyes began to swim with tears, as Draco had feared. He was being so hard on her but it was the only way he could get through. "Are you saying that it meant nothing to you?" Pansy said, choking up.

"It didn't mean _nothing_." Draco paused, putting his hands to his head and closing his eyes. He didn't know what to say. "It... I'm really sorry, Pans, I don't think it meant half as much to me as it did to you." His words were hurting her. She swallowed hard, and forced herself to continue to listen. A tear slid down her cheek. "Sometimes you were a bit too full on, I felt suffocated. How old were we when we got together, fifteen?"

"I was. You were fourteen," Pansy whispered, still struggling to take in his words.

"Exactly," Draco said, as though this proved his point. "Too young... Anyway, I've said enough. Speak to me, now. Please."

Pansy sniffed and then turned to face him. "Draco, you were everything to me. But, to be honest, I don't know why I'm crying now. What you just said didn't shock me."

Draco looked at her, inquisitively.

"Draco, I knew I didn't mean half as much to you as you did to me. I'm not stupid. Did you think I didn't realise? Honestly? Sometimes I would feel so small, so pathetic. All I wanted was for you to love me and I couldn't make that happen. You didn't love me Draco, did you?"

Draco looked down at the floor. He wasn't the best at taking home truths and he had never really considered how he was making her feel. It would have been easy to lie and tell her that he had loved her, but he wasn't a coward any more, he wasn't the silly schoolboy he had been. He shook his head slowly. Pansy said nothing, she just cried silently. She had always known but to have him confirm it was just horrible. After a long silence she said "Then why Draco? Why didn't you end it sooner? You were stringing me along!"

Draco said nothing. The more she spoke, the more of a dick he felt.

"Was it for the sex?" she shot at him. He looked up at her, a defiant look in his eye.

"No!" he said, defensively, looking away from her again. "Pansy, I was immature. I didn't think about your feelings. I was a complete dick. But I was not using you for sex. So many people think I'm that kind of guy. You _know _I'm not!" He couldn't hide the fact that her words had offended him but he couldn't deny that he deserved them.

Pansy couldn't look at him. He was right, she knew he wasn't like that, although it was what many people expected of him. He'd always had this reputation for being a bit of a womaniser. Pansy wasn't actually sure where that came from. He was a flirt, yes, but he didn't use people, he could actually be quite sensitive at times, though he tried hard not to show it. Draco was seriously agitated now, rubbing his head with his hands in frustration. It was so obvious how much he'd hurt her but it was the only way to get through to her. As she couldn't bare to look at him, he could not bring himself to look at her.

"Pansy," he said in a low voice, after several minutes of silence. "I want us to be friends -"

"Friends?!" Pansy shrieked back at him. The last remaining few in the common room looked round at the pair. "Do you understand, Draco? Do you understand how much I loved you?" Draco closed his eyes, wishing he could be anywhere in the world but there. He was not good at this kind of thing. Heart to hearts. Discussions about feelings. Emotional confrontations. Whatever category this fitted into, he was most certainly not good at it.

"Yes," he said, hoarsely.

"Draco," Pansy whispered, a sense of desperation in her voice. Tears were streaming down her face. "How cou - why - all I ever did was love you." She sounded exhausted, as though loving him had just about finished her off. Draco looked round at her and their eyes met. As much as she irritated him he didn't like to see her cry, his conscience squirmed.

"I'm sorry," he said, sincerely. "I'm really, really sorry. I never intended to hurt you."

Pansy's silent tears turned into audible sobs as the final people in their company made their way to their dormitories. Draco scooted along the sofa attentively and pulled her towards him. It was probably the last thing she wanted right now but he couldn't think of anything else to do. He felt so awkward. If he'd known this was how their adolescent relationship would end up, he wouldn't have bothered. Much to his surprise she caved and let herself succumb to his hug.

They stayed there on the sofa for a while. Pansy sobbed into Draco's chest and he sat, with his arms around her, staring straight ahead. He wondered whether the fact that he couldn't stop thinking about Astoria right now made him a terrible person. Then he remembered everything else he'd done and decided that that probably wasn't one of the greatest crimes he'd committed.

After about ten minutes, Pansy let out a big sniff and pulled herself away from him. He was relieved.

"Thank you for being honest," she whispered.

"I owed it to you," Draco said, feeling rather uncomfortable that she was thanking him for telling her that he had never loved her.

"Well, I'm going to go to bed," she informed him, standing and making her way towards the dormitory staircase.

"Goodnight," Draco said, his voice still hoarse.

"Goodnight, Draco," Pansy said, softly. As she turned and started to make her way down the stairs she whispered under her breath so that only she could hear "I love you," and wiping away her tears, she made her way to her room.

Draco let out a huge sigh of relief. He leant back into the sofa and banged his head frustratedly, several times, on the flagged stone wall behind him. All he could do was hope he never had to have another conversation reminiscent of that one, ever again.


	8. Seven: Astoria's Confession

CHAPTER SEVEN: _Astoria's Confession_

Draco remained sat alone in the Slytherin common room for a long time after Pansy had gone to bed. He just wanted some time to think, though he wasn't sure what about. He couldn't believe that Pansy had always know he'd never loved her. He also hadn't realised just how much _she'd _loved _him_. He'd had other relationships besides Pansy, when he was younger. The sort where you hold hands in the courtyard and sneak into each others' dormitories. Pansy was his first proper girlfriend, and she'd been the first person he'd slept with, and he'd been hers.

He drifted into thoughts of how on earth he'd earned this reputation as a womaniser. Admittedly, he had flirted with a lot of Slytherin girls, particularly those in his own year, but he'd never been a user. He'd never cheated, never lead anyone on. He didn't encourage girls to fall for him, shag them and then break their hearts.

Besides Pansy, Draco had slept with two other people. Almost as soon as he and Pansy had broken up he slept with Tracy Davis. It had been in their sixth year, she had found him sat alone in a corridor not long after he had recovered from Potter's attack on him in the bathroom. They had got chatting and for some reason he had confided in her, to a certain extent. They'd never been close friends but she was a good listener and she wasn't so much of a gossip as the other Slytherin girls. They'd headed back to the common room where Tracy had made a pass at Draco. He had felt so alone that he hadn't tried to prevent it from happening. One thing had lead to another and it had turned out to be a completely different experience to what he was used to. Tracy was bad, she'd wanted it rough. She had also seemed to get a weird kick out of seeing Draco's dark mark as they did it. He had though it bizarre, but he hadn't said anything. He had crumbled under the pressure of wanting to feel needed. When they'd finished, she'd left and they never spoke a word of it to each other, like some kind of unspoken mutual agreement.

Draco's only other sexual encounter had been with a girl he had met at a bar in Diagon Alley, the previous year. He recognised her from school, she was older than he was, she'd graduated two years earlier. They got chatting and she'd told him how she had a 'really big thing for him' in school. After a few drinks, resulting in Draco accompanying her back to her house. They'd got straight to it, no messing around, but the girl had seemed confused by the fact that Draco didn't want to remove his top. It was after the scars had started to appear and she also didn't know that he was a death eater. His tattoo might have given her second thoughts. Thinking about it, and although he hated to admit it, Draco couldn't even remember the girl's name.

Snapping out of his thoughts, he rose from the sofa. He made his way to his dormitory, and when he got there, collapsed onto his bed.

"Where've you been?" Blaise whispered from the darkness.

"Talking to Pansy," Draco told his best friend.

Blaise snorted. "Another one of your talks?"

"Yep," Draco said. "I have a feeling that will be the last, though."

"Yeah, like we haven't heard that before. What happened?"

"She was talking about when we _made love_ and I told her we didn't make love, we shagged."

Blaise gave a sharp intake of breath. "Bit brutal, mate," he said truthfully.

"Yeah?" Draco questioned Blaise. "How about when I told her I'd never loved her?"

"Fuuuuck, Malfoy! Did you want to be castrated or...?" Blaise joked.

"I couldn't lie to her anymore. I'm sick of lying. I thought if I just told her the truth it would be the last time one of those stupid chats had to happen. Maybe I took it a bit too far..."

"How did she take it?"

"How do you think?" Draco asked as though there were only one obvious answer. "She sobbed her fucking heart out."

"Ah well, it's over now. Hopefully it won't have to happen again, she's probably got the picture now."

"It's a shame I had to be so harsh to get through to her, but yeah, you're right. She's definitely got the picture... Anyway, I'm guna sleep, all this emotional shit tires me out! Night." Draco rolled over onto his side.

"G'night," Blaise grunted back, and soon the dormitory was filled with heavy breathing as all four boys were asleep.

The next day Draco was confronted by Daphne over breakfast.

"What did you say to Pansy last night, she's dead upset," she informed him.

"Everything that needed to be said," was all Draco told her. Besides, it wasn't any of her business whether she was a friend of both of them or not.

"You never loved her, did you?" Daphne pressed on.

"Look, I had this conversation with Pansy last night, I don't care to repeat it with you, Daphne. I've said all that needs to be said so just drop it, yeah?"

Draco had raised his voice somewhat, and was totally unaware that Astoria was watching them from half way along the table.

"Sometimes you can be an arrogant, thoughtless prick, Draco, do you know that?" Daphne yelled. "She was crying all night! She didn't sleep!"

Draco stood abruptly. He didn't care to listen to Daphne whining on at him, insulting him, making him feel guilty. It didn't matter that what she was saying was true.

"It's really none of your fucking business, Daphne!" Draco shouted back at her, swinging his bag over his shoulder and marching out of the great hall.

Astoria watched him as he left, then looked back at her sister, wondering what they could have been arguing about. Daphne and Draco normally got on so well, this wasn't like them.

That evening, Daphne and Astoria sat together in the common room. Astoria had her nose in a book, studying hard for ancient runes which she had been struggling with recently. She had intended to ask Draco for his help that morning but seeing as he'd stormed out of the hall after an argument with her sister, she'd thought she'd better leave it. Daphne was writing up an essay for potions which was already two days overdue.

Draco and Daphne had not spoken for the rest of the day. He was currently sat on the opposite side of the common room, chatting with Adrian and Blaise. Every so often Astoria couldn't help but glance in his direction, wondering whether he'd noticed her.

After nearly an hour of studying, Astoria placed her book on her lap, deciding to give her brain a rest. This subject really was far too difficult for her. She stared across the room in Draco's direction, and, unbeknown to her, Daphne was watching her. She must have been gazing at him for a good few minutes when the silence was broken between the two sisters.

"You like him don't you, Ria?" Daphne asked.

"What?" Astoria said, in a feeble attempt to pretend she didn't have a clue what her sister was talking about.

"Draco. You like him," Daphne repeated, though this time it seemed more of a statement than a question.

"No!" Astoria squealed, trying desperately to prevent herself from turning bright red. She'd never been much of a good liar. "Why do you think that?"

"Ria, you've been staring across the room at him for a good few minutes now, I've been watching you!"

"I was just staring into space, Daph! I need to give my brain a break sometime, you know?" She sounded totally unconvincing.

"Don't think you can hoodwink me, Ria, I've known you your whole life, remember? You like him! I can see it."

Astoria eventually caved in and sighed. "I - I don't know," she admitted. "I _did_ know. I mean, I liked him when I was in my third year. But that was before he was a Death Eater and now I can't seem to get that out of my mind. I like him, but... it's always there, you know?"

"You liked him in your third year?!" Daphne said, obviously astounded that she'd taken three years to realise how her sister felt. "Wow, that _is _a long time."

Astoria thought for a moment, before asking "What were you two arguing about this morning?"

"Oh, it doesn't matter," Daphne said. Besides she had only brought it up in an attempt to defend Pansy as they were still friends. However, she secretly sympathised with Draco more than Pansy. She did know that Draco could speak without thinking sometimes though and really upset people. She'd seen him do it enough times in their younger years. He was different now though.

"Come on, you guys never argue," Astoria persisted, not taking her eyes off of Daphne.

"Right, don't say anything, okay?" Daphne hissed and Astoria shook her head. "He was in here talking with Pansy last night. She really has _problems _getting over him. Well, all I know is that he was a little too honest and told her that he'd never loved her and she spent all night crying. I mean, they _were _together for two years, on and off. I don't blame her for being upset but she wouldn't even give him breathing space so I can't say I entirely blame him... We argued because I mentioned it to him this morning and he didn't take too kindly to me sticking my nose in."

"He has a point," Astoria said pointedly. Daphne had always been a fan of knowing other peoples' business.

"Yes, _thank you_, little sister," Daphne said. "Anyway, that's why we argued. Why did you want to know."

"Just wondered," Astoria said in a vague tone that she often adopted when pretending she didn't care too much about something. "Anyway, you're right, I do like him but I just - can't forget what he's done. I like that we're getting to be friends but we'll never be anything more."

"Ria, listen to me," Daphne said, reaching out and touching her sister's arm. Astoria looked round at her, not really wanting to listen but she supposed she was going to have to. "Listen, okay? I've known Draco for more than seven years. I'm not going to pretend that I know what went on with this whole him-being-a-Death-Eater stuff, because I don't. He doesn't like to talk about it. But I do know him. I know he isn't the kind of person that wants to go running around killing people. He's a good guy, he's a laugh. Okay, sometimes he's arrogant and cocky but he's not a bad guy. He just got caught up in all the bad stuff happening around him."

Astoria was looking at Daphne, wanting to believe her. Hoping everything she was saying was true. But even if it was true, nothing was going to happen between her and Draco. There was no way he could feel the same way about her.

"You've spoken to him lots of times, Ria," Daphne went on. "What's he like when you're talking to him?"

"He's nice, he is. I know that."

"Then if you know that, why are you bothered about everything else? The past? If _you _like him, you shouldn't let other stuff get in the way.

"You're making this very one sided," Astoria said. "I like him, yes, but he's never made any sort of impression that he likes me."

Daphne sighed and gave Astoria an exasperated look.

"Astoria, for christ sake girl, you're so blind! That day we saw him in Diagon Alley... he couldn't stop looking at you. The day we were on the Hogwarts Express... exactly the same. In Hogsmeade the other day... you were the only one he paid any attention to. He gave you his coat for god sake, I've never seen him do anything like that! Do I need to go on..?"

Astoria opened her mouth to argue back but couldn't think of anything to say. All she could think was that it was too good to be true. He couldn't feel the way about her that she did about him. Even if he did, she couldn't act up on it. She wasn't confident enough.

"He's never been like that with any other girl, Ria. He's never had much time for girls, he made that quite obvious even when he was with Pansy. He's so different around you."

Astoria was lost in thought. She looked back across the room where Draco was talking animatedly with his friends. When he stopped, he glanced across the dungeon and their eyes caught each others' for a split second. Astoria blushed furiously. She looked at the floor and then at her sister.

"Even if he did like me, I'm not going to make the first move am I?" she pressed on, stubbornly.

Daphne shrugged. "Well he's certainly not going to. Look at it from his point of view. He was a Death Eater and everyone knows it. It would take serious guts to admit to a girl he liked them if she knew that. He would have had no problem before, he was cocky as hell. But not now. I think you'd have to swallow your pride and make the first move."

Astoria thought for a moment. There was no way she would tell Draco how she felt based on the fact that her sister thought he liked her. He had always been so out of her league that she'd ignored the fact that she'd liked him before now, no-one ever knew about it. If Daphne was wrong, she would look a total fool.

"Daph, I dunno," Astoria said, uncertainly, sighing. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. When Daphne didn't speak Astoria went on "Look, you were right, I like him as a person. I _can_ look past the stuff he's done... But I'm not going to let him know that I like him. Feelings over complicate things and - and I'm happy just being friends." Her mind was made up. She got up from the sofa, picking up her book and started making her way towards the steps for her dormitory.

Daphne watched her go before calling "You'll always want more!" as she reached the steps. Astoria turned, considered her sister's words, turned back towards the steps and descended.


	9. Eight: Jealousy, Lies and Library Books

CHAPTER EIGHT: _Jealous, Lies and Library Books_

Draco hadn't spoken to Pansy once since their late night discussion. October was about to fade into November now, and it had been some weeks since that night. Although he still felt extremely guilty about the way he had behaved towards Pansy, he was glad he'd done it. He still saw her in classes and around the castle but they kept out of each others' way as best they could. Perhaps it wouldn't be like that forever, but for now, it was good.

Much to Draco's disappointment he had not had much to do with Astoria since their trip to Hogsmeade. They often stopped to chat in the corridors or they talked over breakfast in the great hall, but it never went any further than that. Draco was still holding out in the hope that she would ask him to help her with her work one day and that he would finally get some time alone with her. Although he knew time alone with Astoria would not amount to anything, he still craved it. Not only was she pretty but she was great to talk to. He rather enjoyed a debate with her because she gave as good as she got - this wasn't something Draco was used to.

One evening, Draco headed up to the library in attempt to find a book to help with his research on a twenty inch transfiguration essay he had been set. As he wandered aimlessly through the rows and rows of books, unable to find the book he was looking for, he didn't notice Astoria sitting studying alone at a desk amongst the shelves. She was attempting her ancient runes translations, her brow furrowed in concentration. As Draco ran a finger along the book spines in his chosen section, she looked up from her parchment and spotted his blond hair, her heart missing a beat. She could notice him from a mile off now. She was extremely trained in seeking him out and ever since she had confessed to Daphne that she had feelings for him, she found herself unable to stop thinking about him as though saying it aloud made her feelings more real.

She waited for Draco to draw nearer before calling to him in her usual soft voice. Draco turned quickly art the mention of his name, recognising her voice.

"Hey," he said, casually, abandoning his book search and walking over to her desk.

"Hey," she said back, smiling. He sat down on the desk she was working at and glanced at her work.

"How's the runes going?" he asked.

"Do you want an honest answer?" He nodded. "Terrible. Awful. I can't get my head around it and I keep wondering why the hell I took the subject!"

Draco chuckled. "Want some help?" he offered, trying to sound as though it wouldn't bother him if she said no. He needn't have worried. Astoria suddenly seemed to relax in her seat, giving him a grateful look. "Oh, could you?" she asked.

She removed her bag from the seat next to her as Draco smiled, dumped his bag down on the floor and sat down in the now empty chair.

"So, what are you stuck with?"

As soon as they started working together, the time began to fly by. Draco helped Astoria wherever he could - he wasn't a genius but he knew most of the stuff she was stuck on. Once the translations were complete Astoria thought she would slyly take advantage of the situation and produced her potions assignment from her bag, more for the desire to stay with Draco longer than because she was actually stuck on it.

Besides discussing their work they chatted easily about random things: their summers, music... Draco wasn't sure why he'd ever found Astoria difficult to talk to. Conversation came easy to them. Even easier than it had in the Three Broomsticks. Draco always tried to make sure Astoria didn't get too distracted from her work though, he didn't want to be a bad influence. Draco was just leaning over Astoria to write something on her notes for her when they heard someone near them let out an indignant snort. It was Pansy. Astoria didn't seem to care and continued scribbling notes after Draco was done. Draco didn't speak, his eyes meeting Pansy's.

"Cosy, guys! Very cosy!" she shrieked, scowling.

Astoria continued writing, looking down at her page, trying to hide the fact she had a massive smile on her face. She'd always loathed Pansy and Draco had, in her opinion, always been too good for her.

Draco cleared his throat. "Did you want something, Pansy, or..?"

"Well, I was looking for a book. You know? As this is a _library _and not somewhere for _cosy little meetings _with boyfriends and girlfriends."

The pity Draco had felt for her suddenly vanished. He laughed harshly.

"Firstly, I've never known _you _to go looking for a book. Secondly, Ria is not my girlfriend. Not that it's any of your business."

"Oh, it's _Ria _now, is it? How sweet. Well, let's hope little Ria's mummy will happily welcome the news that her precious daughter is dating a death eater!"

Draco glared at her. He couldn't say the things that were crossing his mind right now, especially in front of Astoria. But he didn't have to because Astoria suddenly spoke.

"Pansy, how about you go elsewhere to cry some tears of jealousy because, if you don't mind, me and Draco are trying to work."

It was Pansy's turn to laugh harshly. "Oh, grow up! You don't even know him! He'll sit with you, he'll help you with your work and make friendly small talk. But at the end of the day, darling, Draco's only interested in one thing. Getting in your knickers. And don't get hopeful, love, because he's shit in bed!"

Draco raised his eyebrows as Pansy turned to walk away, flicking her hair. "That's not what you told Daphne, Pansy, is it? Funny, because I'm _sure _you were bragging to her about how good I was once upon a time!"

Pansy let out a bizarre screech, turning back to face him. "Before you became a depressed, miserable twat who spent all of his life locked up in a room," she yelled. "Then I seem to remember you struggling to even keep it up."

"Well, with your face for inspiration, hardly surprising!" Draco retorted.

Pansy didn't have any comebacks left in her. She turned on her heel again and stomped off, vanishing between some bookshelves.

"Excuse her," Draco said, turning to look at Astoria. "She struggles to let go, see, so she just goes around saying shit about me. I don't use people for sex, just to clear that up."

Astoria smiled. "Don't worry, I've always thought she was a psycho bitch. And you don't seem like the kind of guy to use someone for sex."

Draco laughed. "Thanks. And psycho bitch is a bit tame to be honest..."

They both sat and laughed together for a while and then it went weirdly silent, as though neither of them knew what to say after Pansy's little outburst. Draco despised her for ruining the only time he'd ever got to spend with Astoria alone. Suddenly Astoria's voice broke the silence.

"Can I see it?" she asked. Draco looked at her, confused. "See what?"

"Your dark mark," Astoria said. She didn't sound at all bothered by it. In fact, she'd sounded as if she was asking Draco to show off his prized puppy or something. Draco was actually amazed by how upfront she could be sometimes. He hesitated all the same. It wasn't exactly something he enjoyed showing off and he was rather hoping Astoria would have forgotten about it. Pansy had replanted the seed in her mind.

Draco slowly pulled up his sleeve to reveal the faded skull and snake inked on his left forearm. He held it out for Astoria to look at. She took his arm in her hands, softly, and looked at it closely, running a finger across the snake. Draco remained silent, watching her.

"Did it hurt?" she asked, looking up, her bright green eyes meeting his cold grey ones.

Draco shrugged uncomfortably, his arm still in Astoria's hands. "A bit."

"I don't understand... Why? You don't seem like the kind of guy..." her voice was gentle.

"It's complicated," was all Draco said. He didn't like to discuss it with anyone, let alone this girl that he was completely falling for. Astoria pulled his sleeve back down over his arm.

"Sometimes it helps to talk, Draco," she said. "I think something bad happened to you," she continued, speaking slowly. "I think there's something you want to talk about but you've never found the right person to listen." She was taking a risk because she still barely knew Draco, really. He could have reacted in a number of ways but she thought she would try anyway. Occasionally she could see pain behind his eyes and she wanted to help. Draco was completely silent, his heart pounding, his eyes avoiding Astoria completely. She seemed to read him like a book. There was a very long silence, it was obvious that he wasn't going to open up to her. Yet. She watched him closely but all he did was shake his head.

"It's okay," she said, deciding that she would drop it for now, but she wouldn't give up on him. "Anyway, I think we're done here. Thanks so much for helping me." Draco visibly relaxed once she'd changed the subject. "No problem," he said, finally looking back at her packing her books into her bag. Then, much to his surprise she leaned across and hugged him. It took a few seconds for him to react and hug her back. Having her arms around him felt amazing, and in a way, comforting. Although he hadn't opened up to her, she had been right, and so many thoughts were currently running around his head. Her hug seemed to cease them. After several seconds they released each other and both smiled, their faces not far apart. There was tension, like they were about to kiss but both were too scared to lean in first. Astoria stood to leave, tucking the chair under the desk and Draco's heart sunk a little.

"Goodnight, Draco," she said, leaning down and kissing him on the cheek.

"Night, Ria," he said, and he watched her leave, his hand touching his cheek where she had kissed him.


	10. Nine: Bad Memories

CHAPTER NINE: _Bad Memories_

Draco was very much looking forward to the training session that was about to commence. Ever since he had made that promise to himself to keep fitter he had done so. He wasn't skinny any longer, as he had been last year. His chest and stomach were now perfectly toned, and he planned on keeping it that way. Quidditch only helped matters and training kept him in shape. He headed down to the pitch that Saturday morning feeling lighthearted. As well as the physical bonuses, the team had also become close friends, Draco included, and sometimes they met up at lunch times or in the evenings to relax and discuss team tactics. It had obviously worked because Slytherin had defeated Gryffindor in the first match of the season for the first time in eight years. Draco had been so pleased he'd bought several crates of butterbeer and the whole house had celebrated in the common room that evening.

Draco headed onto the pitch to find the team flying warm up laps as usual. They all flew down to greet him, shivering in the sharp, mid-November wind. Draco's hands were already starting to go numb, god knows what they would be like by the end of the session.

"Sorry, guys, no tactics today. We're going to be out here for the whole session but we won't make it a long one," he told them. "Let's say we'll head up for some drills just to practice the tactics we discussed last week and we'll head in after an hour or so. Sound alright?"

The team nodded, though they didn't much look like they wanted to be there. That was the disadvantage of Quidditch, the weather highly affected the moods of the players. Once Draco had stepped outside he had no longer felt as happy about the session as he had been but he wanted to keep up the morale.

Mounting his broom, Draco took to the air along with the rest of the team. They spent the next half an hour or so just playing with three chasers and a keeper on each side. Draco had identified that the team's main weakness had been tackling and so he wanted them to work on this. He took advantage of the opportunity and used it to explain some of Ravenclaw's tactics which he had noticed while sitting in the stands during their training session a couple of days earlier.

Everything was going well; the team were taking it in turns to fly at Draco, who was speeding across the pitch, and attempting to take the quaffle from his grip. After this drill, they decided to practice some basic passing techniques, an area which needed some perfecting. Draco was perched on his broom, relaxed and waiting for Scarlett Sevier to make a pass to him. Her aim wasn't brilliant, and the ball went far to the right of Draco's outstretched hands. In his attempt to catch the quaffle, Draco leant to the right, and was still not holding his broom. It quickly became apparent that the old Nimbus could no longer support his weight when placed towards one side. The broom rolled, Draco trying hard to grab hold of the handle as it did so but he wasn't quick enough. There was nothing he could do to prevent himself from falling twenty metres through the air. And then blackness.

Blaise was sat in the common room, sprawled out on a sofa reading the new edition of Which Broomstick. He had just managed to get comfortable when Daphne came running through the entrance of the common room and down the stone steps, towards him.

"Blaise!" she shouted. "Blaise!" He looked up at her, wondering what on earth could be so urgent that she was charging around the place. She halted in front of him. "It's Draco! He's been in an accident, we have to go!" She seemed to be out of breath.

Nearby, Astoria, who was studying with a couple of friends, looked up from her book towards her sister. Her heart started beating faster. Daphne wasn't normally one to panic, Draco must be in a bad way.

"What's happened to him?" Blaise said, throwing aside his magazine and bolting off of the sofa as they started rushing towards the common room door.

"He fell off his broom and they can't wake him up!"

"Shit!"

"Daph!" Astoria called, rising from her chair. Daphne turned to look at her sister across the room as she reached the exit. "Is he going to be okay?"

"I don't know," Daphne said, truthfully and her and Blaise left as though there wasn't a second to spare.

Astoria was torn, should she stay and study with her friends or go after her sister to be with Draco. Quickly deciding that she wouldn't be able to concentrate not knowing if Draco was okay she packed up her things hastily and hurried away.

"Where are you going?" Albany demanded.

"I have to see if Draco is okay," Astoria replied and with that, she left.

Draco found himself in the middle of the courtroom at the Ministry of Magic. He looked around at everyone, all eyes on him, and felt nothing less than intimidated. The Ministry had once been a place which he could use as protection against anything that happened to him at school - it had, in a way, been his shield charm. That was when his father had had utmost respect from everyone there. Now Lucius was far away, in a cell in Azkaban, and Draco had nothing to hide behind.

Up in the public gallery sat one woman, his mother. She was perched on the end of the hard, wooden bench, her hands clasped together in her lap, unable to take her eyes off of her only son. She had been cleared of all charges the previous day and Draco was the last of the Malfoys to stand trial. He looked terrified. Narcissa was wondering how she had let things come to this. Her boy, he was only eighteen and he was facing the possibility of going to Azkaban. She had let this happen. She blamed herself.

The new head of the Wizengamot asked Draco to state his full name. "Draco Lucius Malfoy," Draco confirmed in a slightly shaky voice.

"And your wand?"

"It was ten inches, Hawthorne and unicorn hair."

"_Was_?"

"I gave it up and it was used to defeat Voldemort. I no longer have my wand."

There was an outbreak of murmuring from the members of the Wizengamot. When it died down, the head began his attack on Draco, trying to get him to crumble under the pressure. But Draco refused to give in. Question after question Draco answered as calmly as he could and with honesty. That was the only way he was going to get himself out of this mess.

"So you admit to taking part in death eater activity?"

"Yes, I placed someone under the Imperius curse. Besides that, no."

"And Albus Dumbledore's death? Tell me, where did you stand in all of that?"

"Voldemort insisted that I should be the one to kill Dumbledore, although he and I both knew that was never going to be possible. He wanted me to do it in the hope that I would be killed trying."

"Am I right in saying that you assisted the death eaters in entering Hogwarts on the night of Albus Dumbledore's murder?"

"Yes." Draco replied. Some members of the Wizengamot shook their heads and tutted. "But I had no choice," Draco went on, appealing to them. "If I hadn't have done that Voldemort would have killed me. Not just me, my family as well. If you can't see that I didn't have a choice then I may as well give up fighting now. But don't tell me that you wouldn't have done the same. If you think you wouldn't have done the same to protect your family then you're lying to yourself."

Draco's vision suddenly blacked, his heart beating fast. He heard an echoing voice in his head stating "not guilty." He felt like his heart was soaring, until he regained his vision and found himself alone with Voldemort in the drawing room of Malfoy Manor.

"Tell me, Draco, why did you refuse to torture the Lovegood girl?" came Voldemort's cold, high voice. Draco felt scared but he would not stand down.

"Just because you forced me into becoming one of your followers does not mean I will torture people at your will," Draco was sounding a lot braver than he felt.

Voldemort chuckled softly. It was so out of character that it sounded sinister.

"Well, Draco... Do you know what happens to death eaters who do not do what I ask of them?" Draco remained silent. If he was going to be killed for refusing to torture someone then at least he would have died a good person.

"No ideas? No clues? Come on, Draco, you're a smart boy." Draco stared silently at the floor, unable to speak.

"Well, I'll tell you," Voldemort said, as though he was about to share his favourite childhood story. "Those who will not do the torturing, simply become the tortured." Voldemort took his wand in hand, pointed it at Draco and yelled "Crucio!"

Draco's body felt as though it were on fire. He began shaking uncontrollably, though his limbs remained oddly stiff. He tried so hard to block out the pain but it was unbearable, it seemed as though it were never going to stop. He was yelling, shouting, he wanted it to end. Then he heard someone saying his name, a girl's voice, it sounded worried. The voice was becoming louder and clearer, the pain seemed to be fading. There was a bright light as Draco slowly opened his eyes.

He looked around slowly, confused. Daphne was leaning over him, Blaise was holding him down to the bed by his shoulder and some distance away Astoria was looking extremely anxious, unable to look at him.

"He's awake!" Daphne cried. Blaise released Draco's shoulder, looking a lot less worried than he'd been looking several seconds earlier.

"What... wh- what happened?" Draco mumbled. Voldemort's voice was still ringing in his ears.

"We thought you were having a fit or something," Blaise told him, sounding apprehensive, as though it would happen again. "You started shaking and yelling and stuff."

Draco's mind was going crazy. He remembered what he had just seen, what he had just experienced. In his head, Voldemort had been torturing him. What if he'd said something aloud and the others knew? And why was Astoria there? And what was he doing in hospital in the first place, was it because he was fitting?

"Why am I here?" Draco asked.

"You fell off your broom, Draco," Daphne told him, gently. "You've been out of it for six days. We've all been so worried."

Astoria slowly made her way closer to Draco's bed, squeezed past Daphne and sat down in the seat closest to Draco. She smiled at him weakly. He followed suit. Blaise dropped into the chair on the opposite side of Draco's bed, relieved that he was finally conscious.

"Six days?" Draco sought confirmation of this fact. "What the hell." He tried to hoist himself further up the bed to lean against the cushions but pain shot up and down his left arm. He flopped back down. "So, what's wrong with me? I mean, what did I hurt?" His words sounded childlike.

Daphne and Blaise exchanged glances. They were both nervous to reveal the extent to which Draco had hurt himself, though he was going to be fine pretty soon.

"You broke all of your ribs down your left side, which left you with a punctured lung. Your left elbow was broken which is probably why you can't lift yourself up. And you pretty much smashed in the back of your skull. Oh, your ankle broke, too, pretty badly, so they think once you're out you might need crutches for a couple of weeks."

Draco stared at Daphne, dumbfounded. "Fuck," was all he managed to say.

"Your mum came in the day it happened," Blaise told him. Draco looked round at his best friend. "She stayed for a couple of days. She left when she found out you were going to be alright."

"And your team came in, too," Astoria said, trying to cheer him up. "They've been dead worried about you."

"And my sister here has been by your side every single day," said Daphne, giving her sister a knowing look from the corner of her eye. Astoria blushed madly. "One day we had to come and convince her to leave."

"Shut up, Daphne," Astoria said under her breath, completely mortified.

Draco looked from Daphne to Astoria, disbelievingly. Had she really been in to visit him every day? He didn't dare take Daphne's word for it.

"Is that true?" he said, unable to tear his eyes away from Astoria.

She nodded, embarrassed, her eyes on the floor. "I thought you would need a friend here when you woke up."

Draco smiled, he was so grateful. He reached out and took her hand in his. "Thank you," he said, genuinely.

Astoria looked up and their eyes met. She smiled again, widely this time, though she did not speak.

"So, how long am I going to be in this place?" Draco asked, releasing Astoria's hand. He was dreading the answer.

"Oh, no longer than another week, they reckon," Daphne informed him. "You could've been out as soon as you'd woken up but they're concerned about your lung so they want to keep an eye on you for a few days at least."

Draco nodded, though he felt like getting up and leaving at that precise moment. Then a thought occurred to him: maybe Astoria would continue to visit him every day. If that were the case, then he wouldn't mind being bed-bound for the foreseeable future. His spirits were successfully lifted.

"Anyway, Draco, me and Blaise had better be off," Daphne told him. "We've got our last period in five minutes and we have an assignment due. We'll come to see you later."

"Alright, Daph, thanks," Draco said as Daphne and Blaise made their way to leave. "See you later, mate," Blaise said, grinning. "Later," Draco confirmed and the pair disappeared from sight. Draco turned to look back at Astoria.

"You don't have to stay, you know," he said. "You must've spent the last six days bored out of your mind."

"No," Astoria insisted. "I wanted to be here, Draco. Since we became friends you... well, you mean a lot to me..."

Again, Draco was taken aback by how upfront she was. Sometimes she was so shy and other times she would just say exactly what she thought. Draco was sure his heart was beating ten times faster than it should have been.

"You mean a lot to me, too," he said, his voice croaky from where he hadn't spoken in nearly a week. "And it means a lot that you've been here for me. Even if I didn't know about it."

Astoria reached out this time and took hold of his hand which lay by his side. His was as cold as hers was warm. They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, until Draco decided to make a joke to kill the atmosphere. This was something he had done a lot when he was younger.

"So, what do you think of my hospital pyjamas?" he asked Astoria. "Personally, I think I look pretty damn sexy!"

Astoria caught his eye and they both started laughing. Unfortunately, Draco wasn't fully healed yet and the laughter brought a sharp pain in his chest and he gasped slightly, bringing his hand to where the pain was. Astoria stopped laughing and frowned at him.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," Draco reassured her. "Just hurts a bit. Trust me, I've got through worse."

Astoria gave him an understanding look but he was certain she still didn't know what he was hiding. His darkest secret. He just hoped he hadn't given anything away while he was dreaming in his unconsciousness. He didn't want anyone to know, least of all Astoria.

"Oh, by the way..." Astoria said, causing Draco to look at her. "You're right, you look totally sexy in the hospital gear." Draco smirked and gave Astoria a cheeky wink and the pair were laughing once again.


	11. Ten: Slughorn's Christmas Party

CHAPTER ELEVEN: Slughorn's Christmas Party

Madam Pomfrey was adamant that Draco stayed in the hospital wing for a week following him regaining consciousness. It wasn't too bad; a steady amount of visitors, a pile of magazines and a mountain of chocolate frogs kept Draco relatively busy in between his naps. Madam Pomfrey had insisted on him napping every few hours, much to his annoyance, afraid he would miss Astoria. She had kept up her routine for the whole second week, and had been to visit Draco every day. Their friendship was getting stronger by the day and Draco wasn't going to do anything to jeopardise that. He liked having her around. He feared that even if he grew a pair and made a move on her, she would scarper without hesitation, never to glance in his direction again. Friendship was much better than that.

Apart from his ankle and an occasional pain in his chest, Draco was now completely healed and no longer in danger of re-puncturing his lung, which was why he'd been allowed out of hospital, on the provision that he walked using crutches for the following two weeks. He had agreed, reluctantly, and was now hopping around to classes every day with one of his friends carrying his satchel for him.

"Alright hop along?" Theodore yelled as Draco entered transfiguration, his first class in two weeks, Blaise by his side.

"Original, Nott!" Draco said, pausing to clap his hands sarcastically. "Tell me, where _do _you think of these unique and hilarious jokes?" Theodore scowled at him as he made his way to his seat and sat down, lying his crutches on the floor.

"Mr Malfoy, you've missed a lot," Professor McGonagall shot at him, the moment she set eyes on him. "As horrific as your injuries were, I hope your brain remained undamaged and that you intend to catch up over the next week."

"I already did professor, over the weekend," Draco told her, feeling smug. "Here's the last two assignments." He pulled out two scrolls of parchment from his bag. Professor McGonagall raised her eyebrows in shock. Potter, Weasley and Granger were all staring at him as if he were an overgrown pygmy puff. Even Blaise looked surprised as McGonagall came over and took the scrolls from Draco.

"Thank you, Draco," she said curtly, making her way back to the front of her class.

"Bloody hell, Malfoy, how'd you catch up so quick?" Blaise mumbled.

"Well it's not exactly difficult stuff, is it?" Draco mumbled back.

"Pfft, if you say so! Took me hours..."

That evening, Draco was relaxing in the common room, idly practicing non-verbal spells, though he'd been able to perform them from his third year. Astoria walked by with her friends and they exchanged a casual 'hey.' Astoria always played it cool when her friends were around. Draco strained to turn in his seat and watch as she carried on walking. He had never been so attracted to anyone before, it was killing him to keep it to himself. He didn't even like to imagine the things he would do to her if given a chance - well, unless he was alone, of course. Then he thought about them frequently.

Half an hour later, Daphne came over to the boys clutching a pile of envelopes.

"Here you go, boys," she said. "Invitations to Slughorn's christmas party. Looks like he's not so exclusive anymore if he's invited you four," she teased, throwing the invited into Draco's lap.

"I'll have you know, he was good friends with my grandfather," Draco told her.

"Didn't get you into the club in sixth year though, did it, Draky?" Daphne taunted, with a wink.

"Don't call me Draky," said Draco, through gritted teeth. Daphne giggled and ruffled his hair. "See, you're still easy to wind up sometimes!" she pointed out. "Anyway, I hope you're going to be there Blaise," she said, giving him a flirtatious look, and leaning over the sofa, beside where Draco was sat, exposing her cleavage in a supposedly seductive manner. Blaise's eyes practically popped out on stalks. Draco snorted with laughter.

"Don't you just wanna grab them?" Draco asked Blaise and then cheekily reached out and grabbed Daphne's left breast.

"Draco!" she squealed, slapping his hand away. Draco and the rest of the guys were in fits of laughter. "You're such a little bugger!" she scorned him.

"Daphne, I recently suffered a head injury," Draco said, with mock sincerity. "I can't control my impulses!"

"Well, you want to watch I don't take advantage of a sick man and grab your cock then!" Daphne retorted. Draco's face lit up, gleefully, and he held up his arms.

"If you feel the need, my dear, give him a squeeze. I'm sure he won't mind!"

They all laughed, including Daphne. "Dream on, kid," she said to Draco, and with a cheeky wink in Blaise's direction, she left.

Draco was chuckling to himself for the next ten minutes. If he was honest, he loved his and Daphne's relationship. They'd been friends since the first year and there had once been a running joke where they would pretend to flirt with each other. In reality, there was no way they looked at each other in that way. It was just harmless fun and Draco loved it. The real chemistry lay between Daphne and Blaise. They often hooked up at parties but they never made it official.

Draco passed the invitations around and opened his own. Now he thought of it, he had no idea how christmas had come around so quickly. He frowned at the invite and looked up at Blaise.

"Is it seriously the christmas holidays in a couple of weeks?" he asked.

Blaise nodded, his eyes scanning his own invitation.

"Don't forget you're probably a week behind in your mind," Adrian reminded him.

"Ah!" Draco exclaimed. "True, Ad, very true!"

Two weeks later, Draco was surprised to find himself having a good time at Slughorn's party - the very same one he'd got himself chucked out of two years ago. This one was a lot more crowded than before. Slughorn had most definitely decided life was too short to pick favourites and had invited practically everyone fifth year and above. The party was also a hundred times more lively than the one Draco had been dragged through by his ear. The music was loud. Very loud.

Draco was taking full advantage of finally being off his crutches and had already had several shots of fire whiskey and was swaying, ever so slightly, to the music, along with Blaise and Daphne. The dance floor was so packed that he and Blaise were managing to smoke without getting noticed. Draco had just downed another shot when Astoria approached him from the opposite side of the room. He'd been watching her for a while.

"Hey, Draco," she yelled, flashing him a smile.

"Astoria!" Draco shouted over the music. "Having a good time?" As soon as his brain registered the way in which he was speaking, he realised that he was slightly drunk. He was practically yelling in Astoria's face.

"Oh it's not bad, is it? Although the music is just a _bit _too loud. I can't hear what anyone is saying to me!"

Draco laughed, nodding his head. Probably best he just didn't talk. Astoria was wearing a short, emerald green dress, with jewellery to match, her hair tied up loosely with a few curls hanging, framing her face. She looked stunning.

"So, who are you here with?" she asked him.

"Just these two," Draco told her, jerking his head behind him at Blaise and Daphne.

"No, I mean who are you _here with_, here with?" she persisted.

"Oh!" Draco exclaimed, now understanding that she meant who did he bring as his date. "No-one, I didn't bring anyone. How about you?"

"No date for me!" she admitted, loudly. Draco could kick himself. Why hadn't he thought to ask her?

Draco looked around at Blaise and Daphne who were all over each other. Draco rolled his eyes. Every time the pair got drunk they would behave like this and still it never became anything more.

"Oh god," he said, turning away from them quickly. If he watched them eating each others' faces for another second, the alcohol he'd just consumed may just come back up. He looked at Astoria who was laughing.

"Only when they're -"

"Drunk," she finished his sentence, nodding. "I know... Do you want to dance?" she asked him suddenly. Draco looked surprised. This girl definitely had more balls than he did.

"I'm not much of a dancer, but why not," Draco said. He suddenly became too aware of his ankle, which still wasn't perfect. He hoped that he would remain upright but his ankle combined with the alcohol didn't give him much chance. He let Astoria take his hand and lead him away from Daphne and Blaise. A good idea, in Draco's opinion. There were so many people on the floor that Draco and Astoria were pushed closer together than he had expected. Astoria put her arms around Draco's neck as they started to dance along with everyone else. Draco placed his hands on her waist and couldn't help but smile, wondering how this had happened.

"If I'd realised you were coming alone, I would have asked you," he found himself saying in her ear, without even thinking. He'd always been a little incapable of controlling his mouth when tipsy.

Astoria blushed and looked at the floor. She was certain he had only said that to be kind. She decided not to respond, but looked back up at him and gave him the 'I understand' smile. Whether he genuinely meant that he should have asked her or not, Astoria was enjoying dancing with him. He wasn't as bad at dancing as he had made out, and she couldn't get out of her mind how good looking he was. She was feeling the way she had about him before he became a Death Eater. She was completely falling for him all over again, only twice as hard. She just didn't care what he'd done, she didn't care about the mistakes he'd made.

After a couple of lively songs spent dancing and laughing together, the music slowed substantially and a love song started playing. Draco felt awkward to say the least. His heart was telling him to kiss her but his head was overpowering. His head wanted to stop dancing. He ended up compromising, and as they turned slowly to the music he rested his forehead on Astoria's and they looked into each others' eyes. If it were possible it would have been the perfect moment for a first kiss but Draco had too much to lose. Astoria's heart was racing, she was hoping that he would kiss her. But he didn't. As the music faded out Draco leaned in to speak to Astoria. She offered her ear.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Draco asked her. Astoria had no idea what he had on his mind but she nodded. Draco took her by the hand and lead her back to where Daphne and Blaise were. Draco was pleased to see they'd stopped to draw breath.

"Me and Astoria are leaving," he told Daphne.

"Together?" she asked with a suspicious tone. Draco raised his eyebrows in response. "You... you don't do anything... anything naughty with my little sister," her words were slurred and her finger stabbed Draco in the chest.

"Hey! We're leaving together purely as friends," he said, defensively.

Daphne giggled hysterically. "Dra- Draco I was joking! What you and my... my sister want to," she hiccoughed, "to do together is entirely up to you."

"Thanks, I'll bare that in mind," Draco said, grimacing at how embarrassingly drunk his friend was. Astoria looked mortified, her face glowing red. She took hold of Draco's hand and tugged. Draco took the hint and started leaving with her, calling back to Blaise and Daphne "If you two want to shag tonight, don't wake me up!"

He heard Daphne cackle as he lead Astoria through the crowd. He kept a tight hold on her hand, not wanting to lose her. They left the party and made their way back to the common room where they stayed up chatting for a couple of hours, completely immersed in each other's company.

Eventually the other Slytherins started arriving back from the party, most of them completely drunk, and Draco decided it was time for him and Astoria to head to bed.

"I need to be asleep before Blaise and your sister get back!" he told her.

"Loud, aren't they?" she said with a sympathetic look. Draco nodded, a grim look on his face. She decided to throw caution into the wind and hint to Draco, not knowing whether he would understand she was actually talking about them. "I don't understand them, really, everyone thinks they should be together. They think they should be together. But they're not."

Draco merely shrugged, not getting Astoria's hint at all.

"Anyway, goodnight, Astoria," he said softly as they reached the staircase to her dormitory.

"And thank you for the dance." He smiled the most gorgeous smile she had ever seen. The days where Draco Malfoy had only been capable of smirking were long gone although his trademark still appeared quite often.

"Goodnight, Draco. I had such a good night," she told him. He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek as she'd done to him that time in the library. His lips felt soft against her skin and all Astoria wanted to do was turn her face so that their lips met but she couldn't find the courage in her.

As Astoria started making her way down the steps Draco called "Astoria," in a soft yet almost husky voice. She turned hopefully. "Sweet dreams," he said. She smiled and made her way down the steps and out of sight.


	12. Eleven: A Pure White Rose

CHAPTER ELEVEN: _A Pure White Rose_

Even quicker than he'd expected, Draco found himself at Malfoy Manor for the first day of the christmas holidays. He had absolutely no intention of staying there for the whole two week break but he had to keep his mother company for at least some of it. Draco had bade goodbye to his friends at the station the previous day and was already looking forward to seeing them again.

Draco was already keen to escape the walls of Malfoy Manor and he had only been back a few days. There were too many bad memories held there. He made his way outside, the crisp snow crunching beneath his feet as he meandered in the general direction of his favourite bench. The house was tainted in his eyes. The garden, however, was still beautiful. He took off his gloves, lit a cigarette and sat himself down on the bench, shivering as his body collided with the icy coldness of the wood. Holding his cigarette in one hand he used his other to pull up the hood of his cloak to protect his neck and head from the bitter wind. He thought to himself that, no matter how cold it were outside, he would much rather be there than in the drawing room, where everything had happened. While he could forget when having a good time with his friends, he could not erase the things that happened to him from his memory when he was alone. The bad dreams still occurred regularly, and from what Blaise had said in the hospital wing last month, his dreams were worse than even he'd thought.

Giving himself a shake, Draco decided to think of something else. He was beginning to think back to his dance with Astoria when one of the manor's pure white peacocks came strutting past him, barely visible, blending in with the blanket of snow which lay on the ground. The peacock turned to consider Draco as he sat smoking on the bench and then carried on walking, one of his feathers falling from his tail and floating silently to the floor. That was when the idea came to Draco.

Flicking the butt of his cigarette across the nearest hedge, Draco stood and then bent to pick up the pure white feather. He held it up, examining it, looking for any imperfections but this was a Malfoy peacock so, of course, there were none. He stowed the feather carefully in his inside pocket and made his way to the opposite side of the garden, pulling his gloves back onto his hands which were now bright red from the cold. Draco came to a halt only when he'd reached a snow sprinkled bush on which white roses bloomed throughout the whole year, no matter what the weather were like. He stood close, inspecting each rose. He wanted the finest, the most beautiful. Once he had made his careful selection, Draco took out his wand and silently drew it along the stalk, severing the rose from the bush. Once detached, he held up the single white rose and blew the snow from its petals delicately. Smirking to himself and happy with his selection, Draco made his way back to the warmth of the manor.

Narcissa was sat at the kitchen table, reading the Daily Prophet and looked up as her son entered the house, noticing the white rose clutched in his. She narrowed her eyes in suspicion as Draco walked past her without a word.

"Draco, do you have a girlfriend?" she called out to him in curiosity as he was leaving the kitchen. Draco stopped in his tracks. The last thing he needed was his mum nagging him about getting himself 'a nice girlfriend' as she had done on several occasions already.

"No," he replied, shortly, not wishing to enter a conversation about romance with his mother.

"Do you still speak to Pansy?" Narcissa enquired further.

"No, mother. We don't have anything to do with each other any more."

"Oh, that's a shame, dear," his mum said, sympathetically.

"Really, it's not."

"Don't worry, Draco. A handsome man like you, you'll find yourself a nice girlfriend one day," Narcissa said, smiling and eyeing the rose Draco was holding. Draco snorted with laughter. As much as his mum annoyed him sometimes, he had to hand it to her, she was ever loyal to him. He walked over to where she was sat and bent to give her a kiss on the cheek, muttering in her ear "I think you're a little bias, but thanks." Narcissa caught hold of his wrist as he went to walk away.

"You're a good boy, Draco," she said, warmly. "You're a better man than your father." Draco suddenly realised that she wasn't enquiring into his love life to be nosy. She simply cared. He turned back and pulled out the seat next to her, sitting down and resting the rose on the table in front of both of them.

"It's for a girl. The rose," he admitted, although not wanting to make eye contact with Narcissa. He could see the wide smile on her face from the corner of his eye.

"Is it anyone special?" Narcissa cooed. Draco needed to put a stop to her slightly patronising tone.

"Mother," he said, sternly. "I'm not a twelve year old boy with a crush. Stop being like that."

Narcissa straightened her face immediately, though she felt an odd desire to giggle.

"If you really want to know, it's Daphne's sister," he told her, still not looking at her. Dear god, why was he having this conversation with his mum?

"Greengrass?" Narcissa asked.

"Yeah," Draco said casually. "Anyway, we're friends and that's all we'll ever be so... Do you think she'll like the rose?" Draco pulled it towards him and started twirling it in his hands, absently-mindedly.

"I think she'd be silly if she didn't," Narcissa said, reaching out and resting a hand on Draco's arm. She was amazed he was opening up to her. It wasn't something he usually did.

"Do you like her, Draco?" she asked, gently.

"Yeah, but," Draco paused, thinking of how to explain it. "But I don't want to ruin our friendship for the slight chance that she might want to be with me. I'm pretty sure she doesn't. She won't know the rose is from me, I just want to make her smile."

"Why wouldn't she want to be with you, Draco? You're clever, you're funny, you're handsome..." Draco looked at his mother incredulously.

"Perhaps something to do with this bloody skull inked on my arm?" he said bitterly, waving his left arm in the air.

"Oh, Draco," his mum said, squeezing his arm with understanding. "If she can be your friend then surely she doesn't have a problem with your past? I'm sure she sees you for who you really are, not for your mistakes."

Draco shrugged sulkily. He drew out his wand again and performed an incantation under his breath which meant that the rose would never die. Narcissa was reminded of what a great wizard her son was for his age. She was truly proud of him. Draco stood from the table, his chair scraping along the floor. He went to make his way upstairs when his mother said "I love you, son." Draco gave a small smile. "I love you, too, mum."

When he reached his room he took off his outdoor wear, carefully removing the peacock feather from the inside of his cloak. He sat down at his desk, laying down the feather alongside the rose. He then tapped his desk with his wand, and a sheet of transparent paper appeared. Draco took the rose and the feather and wrapped them in the paper in a similar way in which a bouquet of flowers are wrapped, with the top half remaining uncovered. He then traced his wand along the outside of the paper, near the bottom and a white ribbon appeared, twisting its way around and tying itself into a bow. Happy with his work, Draco attached a note which merely said 'Happy Christmas x'. He had meant what he'd said - he did not want Astoria to know where the rose came from. Knowing Daphne would recognise his owl, he called upon his mother's tawny owl, releasing him out of the window with the small gift securely fastened around its foot. Draco watched as it flew from his window and became a mere dot in the misty sky.

The remainder of the holiday went quickly and Draco was back at Hogwarts in what felt like no time at all. He was sat eating breakfast on the first morning back when Astoria approached him. He looked up, surprised to see it was her.

"Mind if I sit?" she asked, smiling.

"Of course not!" Draco said, returning the smile. He had really missed her over the last two weeks seeing as they now spent a fair bit of time together, usually studying.

"How was your christmas?" she asked him, helping herself to egg on toast.

"Yeah, not bad," he said. "It was just me and my mother but it was alright, pretty relaxed. How about yours?"

"It was lovely," Astoria said, beaming. "Sounds like a had a few more people are than you though..." she added with a sympathetic tone.

Draco shrugged dismissively. "It's alright, I like it when it's just me and mum." Astoria nodded. "Are there a lot of you Greengrasses around then?" he asked. "It's just that, if there's any out there just like Daphne, I'm not sure how many the world can cope with..." Astoria laughed.

"Don't worry, there's only one of my sister... It's more my mum's side of the family that get together at christmas, especially since dad died..." Draco looked up from his plate, staring at Astoria in shock.

"What? I had no idea!" he didn't know what else to say.

Astoria smiled sadly. "It's okay, how were you to know?"

"Me and Daphne have been friends for seven years, I even came into your house once. How could I have not known?" He felt like an asshole.

"Honestly, it's fine," Astoria said. "We were both very young and we don't talk about it. There's no way you could have known." Draco eventually nodded in agreement, though he still felt like a dick.

"What was it like being without your dad?" Astoria asked him. Again, Draco shrugged.

"We didn't get on that well, to be honest. I'm happier without him." Draco stared down at his plate again, moving a bit of bacon around with his fork. Astoria could tell that Draco was unhappy, deep down. She was most certain he was hiding something which was painful for him to think about. She wasn't going to give up on trying to get him to talk to her. She was so sure he would feel better if he did.

"Draco, you know what I said about... you know, if you need someone to talk to..."

Draco looked up at her again. He didn't speak for a long while, he just looked at her. He found himself seriously considering her offer for the first time ever. It was a strange feeling, thinking about the opportunity of talking about everything, finally getting it off his chest. He laid down his knife and fork on his plate, not wanting to eat anymore. Astoria was watching him closely and he didn't know what made him do it but he nodded. Astoria was shocked, he was easier to crack than she'd thought.

"Yeah, yeah okay," Draco said slowly and uncertainly. Astoria reached out and squeezed his hand reassuringly.

"It'll help," she assured him. "When my dad died, I mean, I was only eight but I kept it all in here," she explained, touching her chest with her hand. "For so, so long... Once I talked about it, I felt like this weight had been lifted. All you need is one person that will listen and you have me, Draco."

Draco nodded, annoyed with himself that he was agreeing to spill his heart out to Astoria, though he knew she was talking sense. Astoria finished her breakfast and rose from the table, collecting up her things.

"I'll see you in the common room later, okay?" Draco nodded but stayed silent. She turned to leave, completely pleased with herself for talking him round, then she turned back to face him.

"Oh, and Draco..." she said. He looked up. "Thank you for the rose. It was beautiful." And with that, she turned and left, leaving Draco staring after her with his mouth hanging open and wondering how on earth she'd known he'd sent the rose.


	13. Twelve: To Heal My Pain

CHAPTER TWELVE: _To Heal My Pain_

It was late at night, or rather, the early hours of the morning. The Slytherin common room was dim, the only source of light coming from lamps scattered about the place and the fire burning in the grate. Draco sat on the leather sofa next to the fireplace, Astoria seated opposite him.

"Come on," Draco pushed. "Just tell me how you know it was me who sent the rose!" Astoria was laughing openly, refusing to tell him how she knew. "Come on!"

She sighed and gave in. "Okay, okay, your handwriting," she admitted. They had been carrying on like this for about twenty minutes now, if she didn't confess, they would never get to have this serious chat. Draco shook his head disbelievingly and continued talking about the rose.

"Draco," Astoria cut across him, trying to stop him mid-flow.

"...I mean, I tried to disguise my handwriting and everything -"

"Draco!" Astoria almost shouted. She needed to assert a certain degree of authority. It worked. Draco finally stopped talking and looked up from the floor, his eyes meeting hers.

"Draco, what is it?" Astoria said, her voice soft again. When Draco stayed silent she pressed on "What is it that's hurting you so much? Stop banging on about the rose! You're talking all this nonsense and you're avoiding talking about what we came here to talk about. I know what you're doing, I'm not stupid!"

Draco continued to stare at her silently. How could she read him so well? There were a lot of things he'd wanted to say for a long time just to one person who would listen, and now he had found someone who would, he couldn't face saying them. But how was she so sure? He was exceptionally good at occlumency, even Voldemort hadn't been able to get into his head. This, he supposed, was different.

Astoria stood and moved to sit next to him on the other sofa. The flames from the fireplace were causing light to dance over Draco's face, and she watched him intently.

"Tell me, Draco," she encouraged him. "Tell me."

Draco leant forward, his head in his hands. On one hand, he still didn't want to tell her. He feared that if he started speaking about what had been hurting him for so long, he wouldn't be able to stop. And he was scared that he would break down in front of this girl. This beautiful girl, who he had grown to like so much. What would she think of him then? On the other hand, he had yearned for someone understanding to tell all to for longer than he cared to imagine. Astoria was giving him the opportunity, she wanted to help. A few minutes passed before he spoke and Astoria had waited in silence. She would wait for as long is it took. Draco took a deep breath.

"I never wanted to be a Death Eater," he said, still staring at the floor. He would talk, but he couldn't look at her as he was doing so.

Astoria moved closer to him on the sofa, resting a supportive hand on his shoulder for a few seconds, to let him know she was listening. He was finally talking, she wasn't going to interrupt incase he changed his mind. She would just let him get everything out.

"My father has always been a Death Eater, since before I was born. When I grew old enough to understand I was always told not to say anything, else 'daddy would get in trouble.'" He sounded bitter when he said this. "My mother loved him, she would have done anything to support him, but she isn't one of them. Not really. My aunt was a different story. She is the most twisted person I have ever met... besides _him_."

Astoria listened intently, remaining silent.

"I don't think my father was a Death Eater out of respect for... him. Well, I guess it was to a certain extent, but I think it was more fear. Either way, he didn't blink twice at a murder, not until recently."

"When _he _came back after all those years, dad went back to him. He did a lot of groveling because he'd ignored him previously to that and he'd done... he'd done some things that made him angry. Anyway, he did whatever he told him to do, never once tried to stand up against him. That was the example I was being set. My mother tried to protect me from it, sent me from the room when they spoke about it, but I wasn't stupid. I knew what was going on."

Draco turned his face towards the fireplace and stared into the flames. He still couldn't look at Astoria. If she did have feelings for him before he started talking, he guessed they would be disappearing with every word he spoke.

"Father was in contact with him the whole way through my fifth year. If he would've had to choose between being loyal to him and loving me, he would have chosen him. I was so glad that my mum stayed out of the picture. I couldn't bare it if she was anything like my father. When he got sent to Azkaban I didn't know how to feel. I was angry, confused. I lashed out, not because he'd been captured but because this was the life he'd accepted. I saw what it did to my mother, how hurt she was, and I hated him for it."

Draco looked back at the floor, and felt Astoria rest her hand gently on his back. It was a great relief to let all of these thoughts out. Although he felt this wasn't the person he should be doing it to, he was glad it was. Astoria was comforting and caring, and if there was anyone in the world who could try and understand it would be her.

"That summer was when I found out I'd been headhunted, so to speak. _He _gave me this task to do. I pretended to everyone that I was... I don't know. Proud. Within a few days I was given this," he said, jerking his left arm aggressively. "I was far from proud. I was disgusted and I was... terrified."

Draco shook his head at the floor. He was wishing Astoria's hand was still on his back. He was too scared to look at her so he couldn't see how she was reacting to a single thing he was telling her.

"The more time went by, the more I realised there was not a chance I would succeed in what he'd asked me to do. I wasn't sleeping, I wasn't eating. I was missing lessons, working endlessly to try and do something I didn't want to do. When Potter found me in the bathroom that day I was..."

He paused. He was about to reveal one of the darkest times of his life.

"I was seriously considering killing myself."

Astoria gave a small gasp. She couldn't stop herself. Draco had always seemed so strong to her, she would never have dreamed that he had once felt suicidal. She wanted to speak, to offer him comforting words, but he continued talking.

"Then Potter attacked me. I was so weak at that point, I was quite surprised what he did to me didn't finish me off. If Snape hadn't have turned up when he did, it probably would have." Draco ran his fingers through his hair. "As soon as I got out of hospital, I managed to finish something I'd been trying to do. Something to help me carry out this... this _task_. That night, I found Dumbledore alone, at the top of the astronomy tower. It was my only opportunity to do it. To kill him. That's what _he _wanted me to do."

Draco stopped for a minute. He managed to look round at Astoria for the first time since he had started speaking. She was sat cross-legged, watching him carefully. Her face was expressionless, she was just concentrating on taking in what he was saying. Draco looked away again.

"Basically, he felt like my father had failed him. Because of that, he decided it was me he wanted to attempt this task. Not because he thought I could do it, but because he knew I couldn't. He didn't want me to succeed, he wanted me to die trying, in order to punish my father. It would have punished my mother a hundred times more than my father. She _knew _there was no way I could do it... It was me who let the Death Eaters into the castle that night. It was me who cursed Katie Bell. It was me who poisoned Ron Weasley. But it was not me who killed Dumbledore. I tried. God knows, I tried. He told me if I didn't do it, he would kill me and my family. I didn't have any choice but to try. But I knew I couldn't do it... I couldn't do it," the last four words came out as a hoarse whisper.

Astoria nodded. She was shocked with how brutally honest he was being, and she admired him for it. It can't have been easy. Draco ceased talking for a few minutes, not knowing what to say next. He felt sick remembering what it was like to witness someone dying.

"After that," he said, picking his words carefully. "Father returned and had _him _take up residence at our home. The house that I'd lived in since the day I was born. The place where I felt safe and now it was anything but."

Draco paused again. He was still avoiding talking about the thing that was eating him up inside the most. The thing that hurt so much to even think about.

"He killed the old muggle studies teacher right in front of my eyes. In _my _house. My _home_. After that, life was unbearable, he..." Draco fell silent again. His voice was cracking. He wanted so desperately to tell Astoria the one thing that he hadn't told a single sole about but he was struggling to fight back tears. Astoria sensed that Draco needed some help.

She shuffled along the sofa so she was right next to him, and bent forward, mirroring the way he was sat. Elbows to knees, palms to cheeks. The flames flickered, illuminating the tears shining in Draco's eyes. She didn't want to see him cry, but if it helped, she could handle it.

"What did he do to you, Draco?" she whispered. A long silence and then

"He tortured me!" Draco almost shouted. The silence that came after he said it was ringing in his ears and he couldn't stand it. "Voldemort tortured me!"

Draco broke down. The one thing, the one terrible thing he'd kept to himself for all these months, he'd finally said it. Tears were running down his face and he began to sob uncontrollably.

Astoria was shocked. Shocked by what she heard, shocked by what she saw, but she tried to pretend what Draco had told her hadn't hit her like a punch in the stomach. Since this school year began, her feelings for him had grown strong and to think of him going through something like that really hurt her. But right now, she had to support him rather than think of herself.

"Oh, Draco," she whispered. She placed her arms around his neck and pulled him gently towards her. Draco let her, his self respect already lost. Astoria rubbed his back soothingly as he cried in her arms, shaking every time he tried and failed to hold in a sob. She rocked him gently, stroking his hair.

"Oh, Draco," she said again, softly. His face was buried into her. She couldn't believe that this man who she thought was the strongest person she knew was crying in her arms. She couldn't believe what he'd suffered. She had no idea how he'd kept it to himself all this time. There was no way this made her think any less of him. In fact, she thought he was the bravest person she knew.

Astoria waited for Draco's sobs to subside. At least ten minutes had passed when they finally did, and he stayed in her arms, breathing heavily. She couldn't imagine how much he needed this, and was glad she had pushed him into talking. Draco didn't want to look up, he was dreading the look on Astoria's face. She must think him a complete coward. He shifted his head so it was resting on her shoulder and they stayed in silence, both staring ahead for a few minutes.

When Draco finally lifted his head off of Astoria's shoulder she took the opportunity to turn and face him. She was surprised when he did the same.

"You must think I'm such a coward," Draco said, forcing himself to look her in the eye. There were still a couple of tears rolling down his cheeks. Astoria brushed them away gently and cupped Draco's face in her hands. The two looked right into each others' eyes.

"I think you're the bravest person I've ever met, Draco Malfoy," Astoria said, sincerely.

Draco looked down for a few seconds, embarrassed, then allowed his eyes to meet hers again, though he did not speak. They were looking into each others' eyes again, intensely. Astoria leaned forward, resting her forehead on his. Neither of them broke eye contact. Astoria lifted Draco's chin with her thumb, ever so slightly, and brushed a piece of hair out of his face. After a few moments Draco allowed his eyes to close, his heart beating fast. The next thing he knew, Astoria's lips met his softly. She didn't know what made her do it, it just felt like the right thing to do. Her eyes fell shut as she kissed him. He hesitated, so many emotions washing over him. Then he began to kiss her back, slowly, carefully. He brought his hand up to rest on her cheek and parted his lips slightly, allowing their tongues to graze each other gently. He was aware that he was frowning as they kissed, as though in concentration. He was overwhelmed; he'd just gone from crying over his most painful memory to sharing this perfect moment with this perfect girl he cared so much about, in the space of a few minutes.

It felt like nothing he had ever felt. He had kissed loads of girls before, but he'd never felt anything like this. After a minute or so, Astoria broke the kiss, keeping hold of Draco's face. They opened their eyes and stared at each other, almost inquisitively, searching, as though hoping to find the answers to the questions inside their heads. Draco didn't know that Astoria had felt something for him for more than three years and Astoria didn't know of Draco's constant battle with his feelings for her over the last few months. It was Draco who broke the silence.

"That was..." he couldn't find a word to describe it, so instead of using words to show Astoria how he felt, he tried to tell her with his eyes. He wasn't great at this kind of thing, but she seemed to understand him so well, he was sure that she knew what he was trying to say.

Astoria rose off of the sofa and held her hand out to Draco. Draco took it, and stood. Astoria turned and looked up at him, taking his left arm and rolling up his sleeve, maintaining eye contact.

"This," she said, confidently, touching his arm where the Dark Mark was. "Does not define you, Draco. This means nothing."

Draco's heart lifted when he heard her say those words. As long as Astoria felt that way, he didn't give a damn about anyone else. He tangled his fingers up in her brown curls, smiled and leant down. This time it was Astoria who closed her eyes, hopefully, and Draco didn't disappoint. He kissed her tenderly, shyly, stroking her cheek with his thumb. Astoria rested her hands on Draco's chest and deepened the kiss. She had waited three years to be able to do this. When they finally broke apart, Astoria took Draco's hand, and lead him down the stone steps to her dormitory which she knew to be empty.

Draco sat on Astoria's bed as she changed into her pyjamas, making a point of turning her back on him. Draco was thankfully wearing jogging bottoms, which were fine to sleep in. He took off his jumper and t-shirt in silence. He'd always been careful never to let anyone see those scars on his body, but he didn't even think twice with Astoria. He turned to look at her. Although she didn't say anything about them, she was definitely looking at them and he could see pain in her eyes.

"Draco, I can't even imagine what you've been through..." she said. If she wasn't trying to be so strong she could have cried for him.

"It doesn't matter," Draco said, quietly. "Really, it doesn't matter now. Don't think about it."

Astoria laid down and Draco lay next to her, his head at her shoulder. He took her hand and entwined her fingers with his, looking up into her beautiful eyes. He wished she knew how much he appreciated those last words she had spoken back in the common room. He shifted upwards, and kissed her lightly on the lips. He could tell she didn't want it to stop and neither did he, but letting his emotions out seemed to have taken all his energy. It wasn't something he was used to. Astoria snaked her arms around him and pulled him close and while she held him, Draco felt like all of his problems had melted away. He was the man, he should be doing the holding, but just this once he would allow himself to be held. He needed it.

It wasn't long before his breathing became heavy and he drifted off to sleep. Astoria watched him sleeping for a while, stroking his hair. She didn't have a clue what this eventful night was going to lead to. Maybe nothing? Maybe Draco had kissed back out of his sheer desperation to feel loved? She hoped this weren't the case as her hand stopped stroking Draco's hair and she, like him, fell to sleep.


	14. Thirteen: Same Again, Tomorrow

CHAPTER THIRTEEN - _Same Again, Tomorrow_

Late the next afternoon the potions class were dismissed early due to Slughorn having a meeting with professor McGonagall. Draco hadn't been able to concentrate on his lessons all day. All he could think about was Astoria and how he was going to make sure that every day for the rest of his life began how this one had - waking up next to her. He had to tell her how he feels about her and last night had given him the courage to come clean. Or so he hoped. He hadn't got a chance to talk to her yet.

As soon as Slughorn dismissed everyone, Draco packed his stuff into his satchel as fast as he could and swiftly made his way out of the room. It was reminiscent of the days when, had he actually turned up to class, he would always be the first out of the door and heading in the direction of the room of requirement. The thought that he was now keen to leave for something positive made him smile to himself. Behind him, Blaise called his name. He looked round but didn't stop to wait.

"Got to go, mate! Stuff to do!" and he carried on striding down the corridor in the direction of the Slytherin common room. He made his way to his dormitory at once, depositing his satchel, and grabbing two heavy winter cloaks from his wardrobe he left the room. He bumped into Theodore on his way out of the common room.

"Why are you in such a hurry?" Theodore demanded. He couldn't get to Draco now.

"I'll tell you later, maybe," came Draco's reply. He found himself incapable of keeping the cheeriness out of his voice. He didn't sound like him. He didn't stop to engage in any further conversation with Theo and he strode away, heading for the charms corridor up on the third floor. Astoria was currently there, in the last ten minutes of her class.

Draco arrived outside of Astoria's classroom moments before the bell rang to signal the end of the day's classes. He heard the usual scraping of chairs as the students stood to leave, noticing his heart beating slightly harder than usual at the prospect of seeing Astoria. He leaned casually against the wall of the corridor opposite the classroom door, the cloaks slung over his shoulder. The door to the room opened and the sixth years filed out, barely noticing Draco lurking outside. The last people to make their way towards the door were Astoria and her friends Albany and Xanthe, who were deep in girly chat. Draco couldn't help but wonder whether she'd told them anything about last night. As they reached the door, Astoria noticed Draco straight away. She stopped dead in her tracks.

"Hey," Draco said. Astoria beamed, giving a "Hey," back. Her two friends were watching inquisitively, waiting to see what was going to be said. They seemed a bit confused so Draco assumed Astoria mustn't have mentioned last night to anyone, as he hadn't. Draco cleared his throat.

"I was wondering whether you wanted to come for a walk with me before dinner...?" he asked her. Astoria's smile returned, as she nodded, trying not to appear as enthusiastic as she felt inside.

"Ri, I thought we were going to the library?" Xanthe said scathingly, giving Draco a bit of a dirty look.

"You guys go," Astoria said, so happy that she hadn't notice that her friend seemed annoyed. "I'll catch you later, okay?"

"Fine, see you later," Xanthe said, and her and Albany left arm in arm, looking back at Draco, annoyed, as they turned the corner at the end of the corridor. Draco and Astoria started to make their way down the several flights of stairs, towards the school grounds, engaged in usual conversation about their days. As they reached the entrance hall, Draco held out a cloak to her.

"I brought you this," he said. "It's guna be cold out there now."

Astoria smiled and took the cloak from him. For someone so many people thought was a bastard, he was incredibly thoughtful sometimes. She slipped her bag off of her shoulder to throw the cloak around her. It was way too big for her but she didn't care. She pulled it tight around her, breathing in his manly scent which was on it. Draco pulled his on, too, fastening it tight for extra warmth. There was no longer snow, but it was still mighty cold. Colder, in fact, than any January Draco could remember.

As they made their way across the grounds, Draco watched Astoria's arm swinging loosely as she walked. He wanted so much just to hold her hand but he thought he'd better wait until the chat was over with. He still wasn't one hundred percent sure how she felt. They kept walking until they reached the lake, which was glinting, reflecting the moonlight. A lot of work had been done at Hogwarts over the summer to restore it to the way it was, and the lake was now surrounded by hundreds of little fairy lights, illuminating the pathways around it. The romantic side of Draco (yes, there is one in there somewhere) had known it would be the perfect place for an evening stroll, even if it was chilly.

It didn't take too long for the conversation to move swiftly onto the topic of last night. Draco was pleased as he had been apprehensive about bringing it up. He was relieved that Astoria made the step before he did.

"How are you feeling after last night?" Astoria asked him, as they walked the length of the lake. She was peering up at him, hoping to finally find out whether he had feelings for her or not.

Draco exhaled deeply. "Do you want an honest answer?" he asked.

"Of course," Astoria responded, her heart practically leaping from her chest in anticipation.

"I feel better than I've felt in a long, long time," he told her truthfully, though he was watching his feet as he walked, a little embarrassed.

"Really?" Astoria asked. She couldn't help but smile.

Draco nodded, sincerely. "Astoria, do you think we need to talk about... about -"

"The kiss?" she offered. "Spending the night together?"

Again Draco nodded. Why was this girl two years his junior so much better at confronting things than he was? He admired her a lot. Astoria stopped walking and caught hold of Draco's wrist so he stopped too. Finally he looked up at her face, her eyes twinkling. As he looked at her, he felt something. Something strong. A feeling somewhere inside him. But he didn't know what it was.

Astoria nodded her head in the direction of a large tree and the pair made their way over. Before they sat down on the ground Astoria produced a blanket from her bag and laid it down on the floor. Draco couldn't help but laugh.

"Do you always carry a blanket around with you?" he asked.

"Oh, no," Astoria said, suddenly realising how weird it must look for her to randomly have a blanket in her school bag. "Me and Albany and Xanthe always come to sit outside on our breaks so I bring this," she told him. Draco smiled as the pair sat down, both leaning against the tree.

"Well I brought this," Draco said, producing a glass jar from his trouser pockets, which were more spacious than they looked. He took out his wand and lit a fire inside the jar, placing it in front of them to keep them warm. It was Astoria's turn to smile.

"Genius," she said, softly. A long pause and then she said "So... last night we kind of, got close, I mean... closer than we were before."

"Yeah," Draco said, dumbly. Oh god, he could not screw things up now. _Not now_. He decided to go in for the plunge. "Astoria, I've, umm... Yesterday was... I've liked you for a long time now and - and I don't want us to be just friends any more." There, he'd said it. It was done. He turned he head to face her, and she to face him.

"When you say you've liked me for a long time..." she pondered.

"Since... since the end of summer, I think," Draco admitted. "But the more I got to know you the more I... couldn't stop thinking about you." Astoria's heart rose inside her chest. She had liked Draco for so long, and although she'd always dreamt of a moment like this, she never thought it would actually happen.

"Shall I let you in on a secret?" she asked him. He nodded. "I've liked you for a little bit longer than you've liked me..."

He looked at her inquisitively. They'd only really started speaking to each other since September, how can she have liked him longer?

"It's been three years, Draco," she confessed. He raised his eyebrows at her, completely shocked. "Three years I've had these feelings for you. Three years I've wanted to kiss you."

"Wha- what?" Draco mumbled, shaking his head in confusion. He wouldn't ever admit it but he'd never really noticed her before that afternoon in Diagon Alley. He'd said hi to her on occasion before then, but never more than that. He'd never spared her a thought.

"You know yesterday morning, you mentioned that time you came over to our house?" Draco nodded, still looking dumbfounded. "It was the summer between your fifth and sixth year. You came to collect Daphne to take her to yours and you had Blaise with you... You were going for a night out with them and a couple of other Slytherins because you were down about - about your dad being put in Azkaban."

"Yeah! How do you know that?!"

"Well," Astoria blushed slightly. "Promise you won't think I'm a complete weirdo?" she said to Draco.

"Promise," he said, holding out his little finger. Astoria giggled and linked his with hers. As she went to pull her arm back, Draco caught hold of her hand and kept it in his, not taking his eyes off her.

"Okay, well... I was sat at the top of the stairs watching you. And listening. I couldn't believe you were in my house. But I was too shy to come down." Draco laughed.

"So why didn't I ever find out about this? About you liking me? It's not like Daphne to keep her trap shut..."

"She didn't know," said Astoria quickly. "Nobody did... Come on, pretty much every girl in our house fell for you at one point! Loads of girls were jealous of Daphne because she got to be friends with you, like _actual _friends, like you hung out together..."

Draco was still laughing and shaking his head incredulously. "That's ridiculous," he said. Astoria shrugged.

"Well, that's the way it was." Draco sighed at her words.

"Why didn't I ever notice you until this year?" he said, genuinely wondering how he hadn't.

"Draco, I'm two years below you. You could've had your pick of anyone your year or older, why would you have noticed me?"

"Because you're the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on," Draco told her. His words caught Astoria off guard. She hadn't been expecting him to say something like that. She looked up at him, her eyes darting across his face, trying to read his expression. Draco released her hand, bringing his up to her face. He leaned in, his heart beating fast as though they hadn't already kissed. They considered each other for a moment and then their lips crashed together. Draco traced his tongue along Astoria's bottom lip, and she parted it from her top one, granting him entry. Their tongues collided as he pulled her body in closer to his. This was nothing like last night. Last night had been gentle, comforting, understanding. This was passionate. This was a kiss that said 'I want you.'

When they broke apart, Draco looked back towards the castle. There was light coming from the windows of the great hall. Dinner was just about to begin, meaning the dorms would be empty. Draco would never have suggested anything but he didn't have to. Astoria seemed to read his mind.

"Let's go to your room," she whispered in his ear, sending a chill up his spine. He wanted her so badly. He would have waited a lifetime for her, but if she wanted him now he wasn't about to say no. He nodded in response eagerly, clambering up and offering his hand out to her. She took it and he pulled her up, then the pair began making their way back towards the castle, neither of them bothering to hide how keen they were to get to it. Draco definitely wasn't inexperienced when it came to sex but he couldn't recall a moment he'd ever felt like this, so desperate. Astoria wasn't inexperienced either, she'd slept with a couple of guys, but Draco had always been the one she'd really wanted.

When the couple reached Draco's room, they flung the door open and Draco closed it behind him, casting an extra strong locking charm so that they wouldn't be disturbed. When he turned round, Astoria was perched delicately on the edge of his bed. Draco made his way over to her, already struggling to contain his excitement. They were both still in their uniforms. The cloaks were the first to go, cast aside without a single thought. Astoria slowly pulled her jumper over her head and stood in front of Draco, her head just about reaching his chin. She tugged cheekily at his jumper and he immediately took the hint, disregarding it on the floor along with hers. Next were the ties. They kissed each other needily as they took them off. Astoria set to work on the buttons on Draco's shirt, and soon had it off, revealing his pale, perfect toned chest. At this point Draco became ever so slightly withdrawn. He still wasn't completely comfortable with the Mark, nor the scars. Astoria sensed something was wrong immediately.

"Draco," she whispered. "They don't matter. Nothing matters now, except me and you."

Draco knew she was right. He was being stupid. He shook his worries to the back of his head. Right now, he was going to make love to Astoria and he was going to do it properly.

He pulled her closer to him, and began slowly unbuttoning her shirt, revealing a lacy black bra with her breasts spilling over the cups slightly. Once her shirt was off completely, Draco pushed her gently back onto the bed before taking off his own trousers, to reveal the hardness in his boxers. Astoria smiled with delight, she couldn't help it. She wriggled out of her skirt and tights as Draco came to join her on the bed.

Draco ran his fingers through Astoria's hair and kissed her deeply. He wanted this moment to last forever. In Draco's opinion, he had never made love, but he knew that was what was about to happen. Astoria reached behind her to unhook her bra, but Draco stopped her.

"You look perfect," he told her, smiling. She smiled back. Draco's boxers were now extremely tight, he was so hard. He gently climbed on top of her, leaning towards her ear and whispering "Are you sure you want to do this now?" Astoria grabbed him by the neck and whispered back in his ear "I've never been so sure of anything in my life." That was all Draco needed to hear.

He gently ran a finger up Astoria's lace panties, which were already wet for him. He slipped a hand inside them, going straight to where he knew it felt best. She moaned softly as he touched her. His touch was so precise, Astoria knew that he knew exactly what he was doing. His finger was circling her, sending her crazy and she let her head fall back, her hand reaching out for his cock. She grasped it tightly through his boxers making him gasp slightly. It had been nearly a year since he'd been touched by someone other than himself. It felt amazing. Astoria slowly began to rub him up and down as he worked on her gently with his skilled fingers. Suddenly she pulled back his boxers, releasing his cock and she touched his bare hardness for the first time. She couldn't help but glance downwards, she was shocked by how big he was. Draco caught the look of surprise on her face and smirked. He couldn't help himself. For a guy he had quite small hands, girls were always shocked by how big he was, as many seemed to think there was a correlation between the size of a man's hands and the size of a man's penis.

He leaned in and he and Astoria kissed passionately. He couldn't wait any longer and neither could she. Draco slowly pulled down Astoria's knickers and eased her legs apart to give him room to maneuver. He pushed himself inside her as gently as he could and set to work, his hips grinding into hers. It was the most amazing thing he had ever felt. He hadn't felt this with any other girl. It just felt right. She clasped her hands around his neck as he slid in and out of her. Astoria had never been shown before how loving sex could be. Something about Draco, possibly the reputation as a womaniser he had unrightfully earned, had made her expect that he would be rough in bed, that he would totally take control, but he wasn't and he didn't. He was so gentle, so caring, his smooth hands running over her body as he made love to her. Astoria had never felt anything like it. She moaned softly, Draco's breath was coming in erratic pants. He hoped he was wrong, but he was sure it wouldn't be too long until he lost control.

He repositioned her legs slightly, so he could enter he from a better angle. He knew the moment he started getting it just right. Astoria stiffened up, her small firsts pounding the bed softly, moans of his name escaping her lips. Knowing he'd got it just right, Draco began to speed up a bit, his hips moving faster. Astoria could feel herself getting closer and closer to the edge, as could Draco. He gripped Astoria's hip in his hand, his body close to hers, though leaning on his spare arm so as not to crush her. Their faces were right next to each other. He was panting and groaning in her ear, feeling himself getting close to orgasm.

"Astoria, I never want to stop making love to you," he moaned, unable to stop the words escaping from his lips. It was too much for her. She'd liked this guy for so long, been attracted to him for so long, and now here they were on his bed, making love. He had said her name. It was her and Draco, now. She felt a wave of pleasure in her stomach as she tensed repeatedly around Draco's cock, moaning his name over and over again and shaking ever so slightly.

Draco watched her intently. Knowing he was making her come was too much for him to handle and one more thrust sent him over the edge, spilling inside her. He let out a low groan, as he collapsed on top of her, completely overcome. He was still panting, trying to steady his breathing pattern. After half a minute or so he lay down next to her on the bed, and they turned to face each other, their chests rising and falling heavily. There was a long silence and then both of them just started laughing. Neither of them knew why, but they were both so happy that they couldn't stop themselves. Draco linked his hand with Astoria's and rolled in closer to her. Stroking her face gently with his thumb and whispered "That was so beautiful." All he could do was hope for the same again tomorrow.


	15. Fourteen: For the First Time

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: _For the First Time_

Once Draco and Astoria had regained composure, they quickly dressed and made their way up to the great hall to catch the end of dinner. Draco, in particular, was feeling rather hungry. They were making their way across the entrance hall when it dawned on Draco that everyone would be wondering what they'd been doing together. He looked at Astoria and muttered "Umm, people are going to wonder..."

"Let them," Astoria said, quickly. Draco was finally hers and she wanted everyone to know it. She was proud of him, though he probably wouldn't see why.

"You mean, you don't mind?" Draco asked her uncertainly. "Ria, people hate me here, _really _hate me. I don't want that affecting you."

But Astoria knew her own mind. She shook her head fiercely, and they stopped a short way away from the entrance to the great hall, turning to face each other. Draco gave her a hard stare, as though trying to force her to admit she'd rather keep it between themselves but she didn't crack. Instead, she stared up at him defiantly.

"I waited three years for this, Draco Malfoy, I'm not waiting a minute longer! I don't care who knows, I want everyone to know! I would stand on top of the astronomy tower and I would yell it until I had no voice left. I would send a howler to every single person in our world telling them how I feel about you. I _just. Don't. Care_!"

Draco stared at her in amazement. She meant it - she really didn't care what people thought. She wanted everyone to know about them, even after everything he'd done. He looked down and took her hand in his, smiling, then he pulled her towards him and they kissed. When they broke apart he said "Okay, let's just stay clear of the psycho bitch."

Astoria laughed. "Deal! Although I don't see how we're going to avoid her, she kind of sits with your friends." Draco grimaced at the massive flaw in his plan.

"Come on," Astoria said, a huge smile on her face, and the two made their way into the great hall. Down the opposite end of the Slytherin table, Blaise nudged Daphne in the ribs and nodded towards the door, which Draco and Astoria had just walked through hand in hand. Daphne craned her neck to see what Blaise was indicating to and squealed when she caught site of Draco and her sister. Many of the other Slytherins were looking around in interest, too.

"I knew it! I knew it!" Daphne couldn't help herself. In her opinion, this sight was a long time coming.

Draco and Astoria let go of each others hands before seating themselves at the table with Daphne, Blaise and the others. Fortunately there was no Pansy in sight. Draco hadn't wanted his great mood ruined by the likes of his jealous ex-girlfriend. Both Draco and Astoria said nothing as they sat down, and silently started helping themselves to the leftovers, waiting to see who was going to be the first person to say something. Neither of them could keep the smirks off of their faces; Astoria's was strangely similar to Draco's, sometimes.

"Guys, care to explain what was going on there?" Daphne couldn't keep her mouth shut for more than ten seconds.

"What was going on where?" Draco said, acting dumb. Astoria sniggered into her small plate of roast chicken, potatoes and veg.

"Umm, hello!" Daphne said in the high pitched tone she often used when she wanted to know what was going on. She was definitely one of Slytherin's biggest gossips, especially when it was concerning her own little sister. "You two just like, totally made a big entrance into the great hall holding hands with each other, don't you give me the dumb act, Draco Malfoy!" she slapped him playfully on the arm. Draco started shaking from where he was trying to contain his laughter. Daphne was hilarious when she wanted to know something, and he loved teasing her by not giving her the information.

"Well, they've definitely just had sex!" Theo announced. Everyone in their company turned to stare at him, including Draco and Astoria.

"And you know that, how?" said Ad, as though Theo had lost his mind.

Theo flushed a dull red and mumbled something about Draco's hair sticking up after he'd had sex when it was normally tidy. Everyone looked at Theo disgustedly.

"Nott, that's _really weird_," Blaise said. Draco didn't really know how to react - he'd always known Nott was odd, but this was a bit beyond him.

"Nott, have you always had a habit of analysing my appearance after I've had sex?" Draco questioned Theodore. Daphne's eyes were darting from Draco to Theo, then they rested on Theo, a slight look of repulsion on her face.

Theo chose to avoid this question by asking Ad to pass him the apple pie from further along the table. Ad reached to grab it and slid it across the bare wood in Theodore's direction, only he didn't stop it in time and it toppled into his lap, covering his black trousers in cream.

"Oh, for god sake!" Theo complained. "You're a dick, Pucey!" He desperately tried to wipe away the cream while the Slytherins howled with laughter.

"Mate, did you just... make a little mess on your trousers thinking of Draco having sex?" Blaise jeered.

Theodore glared across the table, his face still burning. After a moment he stepped over the bench and strode out of the hall without another word, everyone else still laughing. After the laughter had died down, Daphne continued her cross examination, turning back to Draco and Astoria.

"So..." she encouraged one of them to speak. "Come on! What's going on with you two?!"

Draco looked round at Astoria, who nodded in approval, so he turned back to Daphne and simply said "Me and Astoria, we're together now."

Daphne clapped her hands together, Ad and Blaise banged their fists on the table triumphantly. "We knew it! We bloody knew it!" they yelled.

"Yeah, alright guys, keep it down," Draco said uncomfortably, shoveling some food into his mouth.

"What was it you kept saying, Malfoy," Ad went on. "'I don't fancy your sister, Daph, honest!' Ha, like any of us believed you!"

Draco ignored their teasing and reached across under the table, taking hold of Astoria's hand. Daphne was rising to her feet and before they knew it, she pulled Draco and Astoria, by their necks, into a tight hug.

"Oh, guys!" she said, flapping her hand in front of her face. "I'm getting all emotional. Does anyone have a tissue?"

"For christ sake, Daphne!" Astoria scorned, embarrassed. Draco just snorted with laughter. Daphne had always been a drama queen since their first year. He had known what to expect.

After all the commotion was over, the small group retired to the common room together, Draco and Astoria hand in hand. Draco felt so light hearted, he hadn't felt like this in years, since before his father went to Azkaban the first time round, excluding the times when he'd been drunk out of his face or, occasionally, high on drugs. From then on, his life had gone from bad to worse. Now he felt like nothing could get him down. The five of them took seats near the fire and spent some time together, relaxing, chatting and playing exploding snap.

It wasn't long before Xanthe and Albany returned from their stint in the library. When they entered the common room, both of them looked across and saw Astoria on the couch, Draco's arm around her. They were chatting, not taking their eyes off each other. Draco was idly playing with loose strands of Astoria's hair as they talked. Neither of Astoria's friends knew anything about her and Draco. They marched over immediately. Draco cleared his throat pointedly as the girls stood in front of them, arms folded. Astoria looked round, saw her friends and sat up. Draco's arm fell from her shoulder.

"Okay, care to explain what's going on?" said Xanthe expectantly.

"Yeah," Astoria said, unfaltering. "Draco and me, we're together. We're a couple."

Both of Astoria's friends looked horrified, their eyes darting from Astoria to Draco.

"Sorry, what? Is this some kind of joke?" Albany asked, her tone sharp.

"No. No, this really isn't a joke," Astoria stood her ground. Draco watched the situation unfold, feeling a little uncomfortable. Everyone else remained oblivious. "Does this look like a joke?" Astoria asked her friends, purposefully grabbing hold of Draco's hand.

"So, you're going out with... with _him_? With a death eater?" Xanthe wasn't going to pretend she was happy about the situation. Astoria suddenly stiffened, her attitude becoming a lot more stony.

"Xan, you don't know him! Don't pass judgement on this until you know him."

"Oh, we know enough, Tori!" Xanthe's voice was rising. "We've read it! All about him in the papers! I'm sure we could just roll up the sleeve on his left arm, that'd prove enough!"

Draco's heart was hammering in his chest. He wanted to say something, not to defend himself but to defend Astoria. He knew he would cause trouble for her, now here she was arguing with her best friends because of him.

"If you've read all about him in the papers then you'll know that he went through trial and was cleared of all charges!" Astoria yelled back. The whole common room had gone quiet now, everyone was craning their necks to watch the argument.

"Yeah, I wonder why?! He probably put them all under the imperius curse!"

Astoria stood, coming face to face with her friend.

"Don't pretend you know about his life because you've read about him in the papers! You don't know a thing!" Astoria was shouting right in Xanthe's face. "If you've got a problem with me and Draco, then tough. We're together and nothing _you_-" she looked around at the whole room "- or anyone else says is going to change that!"

The dungeon went quiet. Draco hid his face in his hands, feeling completely responsible. Daphne was staring, her mouth hanging open; she had never seen her sister so angry. Normally she bottled her anger up inside. Xanthe and Albany made their way furiously towards their dormitory without another word to Astoria. After half a minute, the chatter and general noise levels slowly crept back up again and Astoria flopped back down onto the sofa next to Draco, who pulled her into a hug.

"You didn't have to do that," he told her, feeling completely guilty. She looked up at him, his arms still around her.

"Draco, I would do that every single day, for you, if I had to," she didn't normally let her feelings out in front of other people. She was aware of her sister and Draco's friends listening but she didn't care. "Three years, I've waited, nothing is going to get in the way now. Seriously, Draco. Nothing matters to me now, except you."

Draco's cold, grey eyes looked right into Astoria's green ones, and he felt what he had felt earlier, down by the lake, before he and Astoria had slept together. That was when he realised. He realised that, for the first time in his whole life, he was falling in love.


	16. Fifteen:Camera Flashes & Not Caring Less

CHAPTER 15: _Camera Flashes and Not Caring Less_

The next few days passed in a haze for Draco and Astoria. Every morning the couple would awake together - Astoria now slept in Draco's dormitory with him, mainly due to the fall out with her friends - and go up for breakfast. They would spend the whole day apart and then, in the evenings, Astoria would join Draco, her sister and their friends for dinner before they all headed back to the common room together.

As news travels fast around Hogwarts it didn't take Pansy long to find out that Draco and Astoria were now a couple. She hadn't once made a big scene over it, but was continuously making snide remarks at every opportunity. Astoria would have liked nothing better than to slap her around the face and Draco would have liked nothing better than to watch, but the two of them decided it was best to just ignore her. She was bound to get bored eventually.

Friday evening soon came around, and Draco and Astoria could be found together in the common room, at the table, Draco helping Astoria with a potions assignment she had been struggling with. He was leant back in his chair casually, watching Astoria scribble notes all over her third failed attempt at the essay.

"Whoa, slow down girl!" Draco said, laughing at her. "If you write that stuff down any faster you're not guna be able to read your own handwriting."

Astoria groaned and looked up at her boyfriend. "Why is this all so easy for you?" she moaned. Draco chuckled.

"You underestimate yourself. You're a lot better than you think you are, you just can't concentrate very well."

"I'm not underestimating myself, I'm terrible!"

"You are not terrible. Some subjects you're better at than others. We can't all be as clever as me now, can we?" She glared at him and he gave her a cheeky wink. She couldn't help but smile. "Look, it's getting late. Why don't you pack this up and we'll finish it tomorrow when we get back from Hogsmeade?"

Astoria felt relief when Draco suggested it. "Oh, I thought you'd never say," she said, throwing down her quill and leaning back in her chair. Draco shook his head at her disbelievingly. He stood and stretched, letting out a groan; he'd been sat on the hard wooden chair for over an hour.

"Come on, madam, let's go to bed," he said, once Astoria had finished packing up her things. He offered his hand to her and she took it immediately, standing too.

"So, are we going to sleep when we get to your dorm?" she asked, a glint in her eye. Draco raised an eyebrow at his girlfriend, but he couldn't help the smirk which appeared on his face. He leaned down towards her ear.

"Depends what else you have in mind?" he muttered in her ear. She starting making her way over to the stone stairway, Draco smacking her bum as she went, and quickly following her.

Within minutes Draco and Astoria were under the duvet on Draco's bed, kissing passionately. In no time at all, Astoria was slipping her hand under Draco's boxers and stroking his arousal. He moaned as she brushed her thumb lightly over his end. Luckily Draco's room mates weren't around - he and Astoria had made love every day since the first time, and this night wasn't going to be any different.

Draco lead back and let his eyes fall shut as Astoria climbed on top of him, undoing his shirt buttons and leaving a trail of kisses down his chest to the waistband of his underwear, where she lingered, teasing him.

"Fuck," Draco groaned, throatily. Astoria smirked against his stomach, loving every minute of making him want her.

Astoria crawled back up, her face meeting Draco's. He opened his eyes and looked at her as if to ask why she had stopped. She gave him an innocent smile and he closed his eyes again, muttering "Ria," elongating the 'a' sound. As much as she loved teasing him, Astoria couldn't ever do it for too long because, truth be told, she wanted him just as badly. She headed back down, pulling his trousers and boxers with her. She licked him all the way from base to tip. Draco gave a sharp intake of breath, before she took him in her mouth and began to suck him. Her lips around him felt amazing, more than amazing, but he knew it wouldn't be long until she stopped and they were making love and he was glad.

Sure enough, after a few minutes, Astoria came back up and their lips locked in a heated kiss. Rolling on top of her, Draco made quick work of her shirt, unbuttoning it and kissing from her earlobe, down her neck and along her clavicle. She moaned softly in desperation. Once her shirt was off, Draco unhooked her bra to reveal her breasts which were the perfect size. He lay his hands on them, squeezing gently as little moans continued to escape her lips.

Draco didn't even bother removing Astoria's skirt - instead he hoisted it up to around her waist and slowly pulled down her underwear, feeling himself get even harder at how wet she was. They had already began to understand exactly what the other liked and so Astoria was shouting Draco's name almost as soon as he started pounding himself into her. He smirked to himself, pleased that he still had the skills he'd been blessed with. What Pansy had said about him being shit in ben couldn't have been further from the truth.

As Draco made love to Astoria, her nails dug into his back. Draco loved the feeling. It wasn't too long before Astoria was moaning, begging him to go faster and harder. It turned him on more than anything. He did as he was told, giving her what she wanted. How could he not, now she was his girlfriend?

In what seemed like no time at all, Astoria pulled a face that Draco was already becoming very accustomed to. "Oh, Draco!" she yelled, as she began to come, not bothering to keep her voice down. Draco held her in his strong arms as she came, making his thrusts a lot gentler. Once her orgasm subsided, Astoria was panting heavily in his ear, running her hand up and down his left arm absentmindedly, her eyes still closed. Draco glanced down at her hand running repeatedly over his dark mark, and smiled slightly as he supposed she was completely comfortable with it. He leant down and whispered "turn over," in her ear hungrily. She did as she was told and he entered her from behind. It felt so amazing that, within a couple of minutes, Draco reached climax, holding Astoria's hips in his hands and thrusting into her. Once her was finished they both collapsed onto the bed. Draco pulled Astoria towards him, her head resting on his chest, pulling the duvet up to cover both of them and it wasn't long before she fell asleep in his arms.

The next day, the weather outside Madam Puddifoot's was indecisive. One minute the sun would shine, the next a grey cloud would drift over and the skies would open. This didn't matter to Draco and Astoria who were sat inside, very much engrossed in each others' company on their first official date. They had chosen a table in the back corner of the tea shop with squishy armchairs and a cute little table and were immersed in conversation, totally unaware of everything that was going on around them.

Astoria was also impressed with the effort Draco had made. He was wearing brown chinos and a short sleeve, navy and white checked shirt. She was relieved that he no longer wore black suits every day like he used to. She supposed it was something to do with the new lack of his father's influence. In Astoria's opinion Draco was the most handsome man around. And he was hers.

Over the last couple of months Draco and Astoria had become good friends, but today they were learning so many new things about each other as they sat and chatted. Draco had told Astoria all about how he wants to work for Nimbus because of his life-long love of flying. In return she had told him how she wants to own her own robe shop, selling her own designs, because of her love of fashion. This had lead the topic of conversation swiftly onto clothes and Draco had confessed how he and Blaise love going out shopping together for the day. Astoria had laughed so much as Draco had muttered something about him and Blaise secretly being 'really girly'. Astoria had then complimented him on his choice of clothes for their day together which he had accepted gracefully.

They had also spent a while discussing their childhoods and Astoria had opened up to Draco about her dad dying, a little. Draco thought back to how he'd gone off the rails when his dad was sent to prison and he decided there and then that Astoria was a much stronger person than he is. He was glad she was happy to talk to him about it, especially at such an early stage in their relationship. It showed that she trusted him. In return, he had told her about how he felt when he 'lost' his dad, and how he'd struggled to cope at first, and about how he was much happier now. Their circumstances were entirely different but each understood how the other felt.

After several drinks and more than two hours spent in the teashop, Draco checked his watch and was disappointed that it was already time to start heading back to school. He cleared the bill with Madam Puddifoot and returning, holding out Astoria's coat for her to put on.

"Good job we decided on coats," Draco said, looking out of the window at the grey sky.

He and Astoria collected their bags full of shopping - they had gone slightly overboard, particularly in Honeydukes. The bell tinkled as the pair left the shop, and they had just started to make their way up the street when they were confronted by a couple of reporters , including Rita Skeeter, and several photographers. Several bright flashes went off, temporarily blinding them both.

"What the fuck?" Draco said, angrily. Thinking fast, he quickly took hold of Astoria's hand and striding away from the journalists, Astoria trying hard to keep up with his pace. Her heart was beating fast, she didn't understand what was going on. The reporters started jogging to keep up with them, shouting an array of different questions which Draco couldn't hear clearly from the sound of his blood pumping in his ears.

"Just keep close to me, okay?" Draco told Astoria, as a photographer caught up with them, walking close to Astoria. Astoria nodded up at Draco clinging tightly to his hand, but then a flash went off in her face. Draco let go of her hand, putting his arm around her shoulder and attempting to shield her face from the camera. He had no desire for her to receive the kind of media attention that he still did from time to time.

Draco was so angry, he was fuming, but he was determined not to snap. If he did, that would be giving the journalists exactly what they wanted - proof that he is the person they think he is.

"Do you realise this man you are walking with is a death eater?" a short fat reported with a beard shot at Astoria as he ran alongside her.

"Don't speak to her!" Draco shouted. He couldn't stop himself, he had never felt this angry in his entire life. All he wanted to do was protect his girlfriend. After a few more minutes, the reporters and photographers gave up and stopped pursuing them, obviously realising they were going to get nothing out of them. After another minute or so, Draco stopped walking, catching hold of Astoria's arm to stop her, too.

"Astoria, I'm so sorry you had to go through that," he told her. She could tell he was angry but she could hardly blame him. Astoria shook her head.

"It's fine," she told him. "Basically, it's not fine - it's far from fine. But I'm fine." He voice was gentle. Draco was surprised that she didn't want to dump him on the spot now she knew what she had got herself into. This was the second time their relationship and caused trouble for her and they hadn't even been dating a week. Draco pulled her into a hug.

"I had such a brilliant time today, Draco. I think you're such a great person. You shouldn't have to go through that shit. You don't deserve it." She sounded angry.

"I don't care about me!" Draco said. "What is there that they can write about me that they haven't already written? Nothing. I couldn't care less. But you shouldn't have to go through that. We've not even been together a week for christ sake, it's not right! You've already argued with your friends because of me and now this. I'm really sorry."

But Astoria was smiling. "Draco, I've told you. I don't care. I would go through anything as long as we can be together so stop apologising before I hex you!"

Just then, there was a low rumble of thunder. Draco and Astoria looked up towards the sky as large drops of rain started to fall from above them. Draco blinked several times and looked down at Astoria. After a few heavy drops came an absolute downpour. His eyes met Astoria's, her make-up smudging around her eyes, Draco's hair sodden and sticking to his forehead. Astoria slowly began to smile, the most beautiful smile Draco had ever seen. He quickly followed suit and before they knew they were in fits of laughter. Astoria grabbed Draco's hand and they ran for shelter under some dense trees, not that there was much point - their clothes were already soaked through. Draco leaned against a tree, his laughter mixed with his heavy breathing from the running. Astoria was doubled over in fits of giggles and Draco found himself not being able to stop, her laughter was infectious. He hadn't laughed like this in such a long time.

Astoria moved towards him and Draco leaned in, capturing her lips in a kiss. The fact that they were getting completely drenched seemed to make it romantic, for some reason. It wasn't long though, until they started shivering from the combination of being cold and wet, and they begrudgingly made their way back to the castle.

The next morning over breakfast, Blaise and Daphne tried to hide the Daily Prophet from Draco and Astoria as they reached the Slytherin table but Draco was having none of it. He held his hand out silently to Blaise, who eventually, after much complaining, surrendered the newspaper over to Draco. Draco didn't have to search more than half a second to find what he was looking for - there was a picture of him and Astoria on the front page with the caption reading 'Death Eater love'. He turned to the seventh page to read the article. Draco began to read, Astoria peering at the page over his shoulder. Daphne and Blaise watched apprehensively as their eyes flicked across the page. It read:

"_Draco Malfoy, the youngest known Death Eater, appears to have found love after a mere four months of returning to Hogwarts._

_Malfoy, the only son of Lucius and Narcissa, yesterday spent several hours in the cosy teashop, Madam Puddifoot's in Hogsmeade. The cafe is highly popular amongst couples and he and the girl in question, said to be the youngest Greengrass daughter, looked very much in love as they held hands over the table. Showing no remorse whatsoever, Malfoy wore a short sleeve shirt, showing off his Dark Mark at ease._

_Once the pair left the teashop they were confronted by reporters and photographers which Malfoy, 18, was most angry about. He and his girlfriend refused to answer our questions and he became aggressive when questions were directed towards the girl, yelling "Don't speak to her!"_

_He returned to Hogwarts on September the 1st, along with several other students selected, despite his obvious commitment to the late Lord Voldemort. Headmistress Professor McGonagall refused to comment on his return, saying the boy's life was nobody's business, but admitting that there were 'special circumstances' to his case._

_The girl seemed more than happy in Malfoy's company, clinging to his hand as they made their way up the street, yesterday. Let us only hope that she knows what she is getting herself into._"

Draco finished reading, and folded up the newspaper throwing it down on the table. All eyes were on him, waiting for a reaction. Blaise was expecting him to explode with rage any moment, but he didn't.

"Well, if that's the best they can come up with for the front page news then I pity them," Draco said with a sign, helping himself to cereal and milk. Astoria was watching him carefully, trying to detect whether he was just trying to cover up his anger.

"You mean, you're not bothered?" Blaise asked him. If Draco didn't get angry over this then he really was a changed person. Draco shrugged his shoulders dismissively.

"Nah, couldn't care less, mate." He reached across and put his arm around Astoria's shoulders, and pulled her in, kissing her on the top of her head. "As long as I have this girl, I really couldn't care less."


	17. Sixteen: Acceptance

CHAPTER SIXTEEN: _Acceptance_

There were various reactions that day concerning the front page splash that was Draco and Astoria's relationship. Many were supportive, Draco's friends in particular advising him to ignore everything the papers say, which he was already doing. Others weren't so positive, Pansy and Xanthe to name two. Pansy had spent the majority of their transfiguration lesson aiming jibes in Draco's direction. Eventually, McGonagall had become infuriated with Pansy quoting the article in loud whispers and had confiscated the newspaper from her, telling her to stay behind at the end of the lesson.

"Naughty, naughty, Pansy. Need to learn to keep that mouth shut!" Draco said across the classroom. The class laughed, including Daphne who was no longer on good terms with Pansy, due to her behaviour towards Draco and Astoria.

Astoria had been confronted by her friends outside potions the same morning. Xanthe brandished her copy of the Daily Prophet in Astoria's face.

"Is this really what you want?" she had asked her. "Your whole family are going to read this, Tori. If I were you I'd be damn well embarrassed!"

Astoria had noticed that, although Albany always stood beside Xanthe, she never had much to say on the matter. She had a sneaking suspicion that Albany was just going along with Xanthe to make life easier. Astoria snatched the Prophet out of Xanthe's hand, dropped it to the floor and set fire to it with a flick of her wand.

"We don't care what the papers write," was all she said, still staring at her old friend.

"Ugh! What are you doing you psycho?!" screeched Xanthe, putting the fire out. "You're turning into him already!"

Astoria merely shrugged her shoulders, a smirk playing on her lips. Xanthe looked angry.

"Don't come crying to me when he breaks your heart, because I won't care Ria, I'm warning you!"

Astoria snorted with laughter. "Yeah, right. Because you were always the kind of friend I could lean on when I needed someone..? You're all mouth, Xanthe, and all you care about is yourself. You're not the kind of person one can share their problems with anyway. I'd rather cry on Fenrir Greyback's shoulder than yours!"

Xanthe scowled, taking a step closer to Astoria. "Ha, it's funny how you use the name of a death eater ironically, isn't it? Your boyfriend is one, you stupid cow, he's not so different to Greyback, is he?"

Astoria drew back her hand before she could stop herself and slapped Xanthe hard around the face, her small hand leaving a faint red handprint on her cheek. Xanthe stared at her, open mouthed. At that moment, Slughorn opened the potions classroom door and the class started filing in. Astoria and Xanthe remained outside, staring daggers at each other.

"Now, now, what's going on here?" said Slughorn, jovially.

The two girls stared at each other for a moment longer before Xanthe mumbled "Nothing, sir," and made her way into the class, not long followed by Astoria. One thing was for certain, she wasn't going to take any shit from anyone.

Astoria returned to her dormitory that lunchtime to move some more of her things into Draco's room. When she approached her bed she saw a letter waiting for her atop her pillow. She hastened to open it, recognising her mother's handwriting. She knew at once what it was about.

_Astoria,_

_I expect you can imagine my surprise as the Daily Prophet landed in front of me at breakfast this morning. Is this Skeeter woman correct in saying that you are dating the Malfoy boy? I know I have allowed him into our home in the past, but that was long before I knew where his loyalties lie._

_If the paper is right, there is nothing I can do to stop you dating this boy. However, I want you to know that he will not be gracing us with his presence here at home. Your father wouldn't have allowed it, and neither shall I._

_Look after yourself,_

_Mum_

Astoria's eyes began to swim with tears of anger as she read and re-read the letter again and again. Her friends had let her down and now, so had her own mother. Astoria was so angry that her mother was passing judgement on Draco before getting to know him, as so many others did. And bringing her father into the equation was like a slap around the face - her mum was using her dad's memory to try and make her feel ashamed. It didn't work though. She would never be ashamed of Draco. Wiping away her tears with the back of her hand, she shoved the letter into her robe pocket, picked up a pile of clothes and left to deposit them in Draco's room.

Later that day Astoria sat alone at the Slytherin table - the others hadn't arrived yet. She was lost in thoughts about the letter that was still in her pocket, pushing her food around her plate with her fork. She was planning on showing the letter to Daphne as soon as she got there, but she didn't want Draco to see it, it would make him worry even more.

It wasn't long before Astoria spotted Draco entering the great hall, along with Blaise, Daphne and Adrian. Draco seated himself next to her with a cheerful "hey," and a kiss on the cheek. Daphne sat opposite her sister, who quickly passed the letter across the table without a word. Daphne started to read the letter as Draco asked "How was your day?"

"Umm, it was... interesting," Astoria told him, not wanting to lie to him but not wanting to tell him the truth either.

"Interesting meaning..."

"Well, I set fire to the Prophet after Xanthe waved it in my face and then I slapped her around hers."

"Wow," Draco said, ceasing spooning mashed potato onto his plate and looking round at his girlfriend, worried. "So when you say interesting, you mean bad?"

"Oh it gets worse," Daphne said sincerely, looking up from the letter. "Ria, mum's being completely -" she didn't notice Astoria glaring at her, trying to get her to shut up without words "- out of order! I'm going to write back to her now, don't worry I'll sort it."

Draco looked apprehensive. "Why, what's your mum said?"

"Daph, couldn't you just keep your mouth shut for once?!" Astoria cried, hiding her face in her hands. She really didn't want Draco to see the letter, she thought he would be devastated as he'd been trying so hard to change peoples' opinions of him. Daphne ignored her sister's apparent outrage and passed the letter across to Draco. Astoria tried to snatch it out of his hand, but he moved it out of her reach and read it through. When he was finished, he continued to stare at the letter, though he didn't speak.

"Draco, give me the letter," Astoria said desperately. "Please."

Draco turned to her, looking concerned. He blinked several times, looking as though he was trying to think of something to say. He reluctantly handed the letter back to Astoria. He didn't know what to say to make her feel better, it was obvious that she was angry and upset. He pulled her into a hug as she shoved the letter back into her pocket.

"Don't worry about it," he whispered to her, trying to comfort her. "It doesn't matter. It's going to take a while for people to get used to us, your family included. You can hardly blame her."

Silent tears began to slide down Astoria's cheeks, dropping onto Draco's trousers. Though he couldn't see her, Draco knew from Astoria's sniffles that she was crying. He really wished they were somewhere more private rather than in a giant hall full of people.

"Hey, come on," he said softly. He stood up, preparing to leave the hall. He hated Astoria being so upset, so he would take her somewhere private so that they could talk about it. He picked up her bag and slung it over his shoulder. "Come on," he said again, as Daphne, Blaise and Ad watched on. Astoria stood up slowly, clambering over the bench. Draco put his arm comfortingly around her shoulder, turned to the others and said "See you later."

"I'll talk to mum, Ria! I'll sort it!" Daphne yelled as Draco and Astoria made their way from the great hall.

When they reached Draco's dormitory, Astoria flopped down miserably onto his bed as he closed the door quietly behind them. Draco approached the bed, seating himself on the edge, Astoria on her tummy facing away from him.

"Hey, come on," Draco said again, softly, resting his hand on her back. After a brief moment, Astoria sat up and faced him, cross legged, peering at him.

"Draco, I'm so sorry, I didn't want you to see the letter -" Draco held a finger up to her lips to quieten her.

"You don't have anything to apologise for, Ria. We knew people were going to react like this. Once people get used to it, it'll blow over." He wasn't entirely sure he believed what he was saying but he was trying to make her feel better. She gave his efforts a sad smile.

"But what she said about dad. That was horrible." Draco nodded in agreement, he wouldn't argue with her on that.

"Look, you're your mum's little girl. She's going to be worried, isn't she? I'm sure if it was your daughter -" Astoria giggled at the thought. Or maybe more due to the fact that it was Draco expressing the thought than the thought itself.

"Do you want children, Draco?" she asked him suddenly.

He gave a long, awkward pause in response and then said "Yeah. Yeah, I suppose I'd like to prove I can be better than my dad was, yeah."

Astoria gave another sad smile. "Well, if mum ever comes around, I have little cousins that you'll have to meet. Trust me, they might change your mind."

Draco laughed. "I don't think I'm going to be coming to any family gatherings just yet!"

Astoria laughed. Draco lifted his hand and wiped a tear from her cheek, leant in and kissed her lightly on the lips. "No more crying, okay?" he told her.

"Okay," she said, smiling at him. Not a sad smile this time, but her beautiful genuine smile which he loved so much.

"Good girl," Draco said, pulling her into a hug, resting his chin on top of her head. "We can get through anything, you'll see."

Two days later, Daphne marched up to Draco and Astoria in the great hall looking very pleased with herself.

"I wrote to mum!" she announced. Worrying looks instantly appeared on Draco and Astoria's faces. "Guys, why so glum? You know how totally brilliant I am, don't say you doubted my skills to talk her around for one moment!"

Astoria looked at her older sister, dumbfounded. "You mean, you actually got her to stop being a bitch?"

"Not only that! Draco's coming to us for easter!" Daphne beamed at her sister and friend like she'd never been so proud of herself in her entire life. Draco, on the other hand, glanced nervously in Astoria's direction; he didn't know whether this was good news or bad. Judging by the smile on Astoria's face, it was good. He looked back towards Daphne.

"Thank you so much, Daph!" Astoria said, leaning across the table and hugging her sister. "How did you convince her so easily? She seemed pretty dead set against Draco ever coming to ours!"

Daphne shrugged, though it was a bit late for modesty. Draco, knowing she had done him a massive favour, managed to contain his laughter.

"I just wrote and said that I think he deserved a chance and that if she didn't like him after she met him then she would have a right to say those things. Basically, she was being bloody well out of order, and I made sure she knew it!"

Draco was embarrassed. He hoped it hadn't created any awkwardness or going to theirs for easter was going to be a lot more unpleasant than their mum refusing to ever meet him. Nonetheless he thanked Daphne, especially as it had cheered Astoria up no end. He hated seeing her down.

"So, is easter a big thing at yours then?" Draco asked the girls nervously. They both smirked in response to this question, Astoria saying "Yeah, about ten or twelve of us usually. We have a massive sunday roast, stuff like that..."

Draco looked towards Daphne, not wanting his girlfriend to see the look of concern on his face. Daphne caught his eye and smiled. Draco was always good at impressing the right people, he always had been. She knew he would be just fine.

Two months later, Draco found himself walking up the driveway of the Greengrass' house. Though the Greengrasses were an old pureblood family, they weren't half as wealthy as the Malfoys. Their house was a modest size, though bigger than Draco's in central London, but it looked lovely all the same. It was full of character with creeping ivy making its way up to some of the windows on the upper floor and rose bushes scattered around the front garden. It was exactly how Draco had remembered from three years ago.

When Draco reached the door, he took a deep breath, cleared his throat and knocked on the front door which was dark green in colour. He stood back and waited for the door to be opened. He checked his clothes over quickly; he had chosen to wear dark jeans and a green long sleeved shirt, with the top couple of buttons undone so he didn't look too formal. He saw a figure through the hazed glass panel in the door. Astoria. She hastened to answer the door.

"Draco!" she said, throwing her arms around him the second she saw him. Draco hugged her back. "I missed you!"

Draco laughed, still hugging her. "It's only been a few days." Letting go of each other, Draco whispered, "So, give me a briefing... what am I up against here?"

Astoria laughed. "It's a little family gathering, Draco, not a duel."

"Little?" Draco repeated, hopefully.

"Me, Daph, mum, my aunty and uncle, my other aunty and her two children and my grandma," Astoria listed.

Draco took a second to prepare himself. If it wasn't for his reputation then he wouldn't have been bothered in the slightest, even though he wasn't used to this. He had never met any of Pansy's family.

"Come on," said Astoria, taking his hand. "It's going to be fine. I don't know what Daphne's said but mum's even half looking forward to meeting you properly, now." She winked at him and the pair made their way into the house. "Everyone's in the lounge," Astoria informed Draco as he peered around her house.

They entered the lounge but barely anyone even seemed to notice. Except Daphne and the girls' mum, Celia. Daphne came over immediately, giving Draco a hug and muttering a few words of assurance in his ear. Celia was sat in an armchair directly across from them, watching. After some encouragement from Astoria, they approached her together. She stood as they headed in her direction.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs Greengrass," Draco said when he reached her, holding out his hand.

She eyed Draco's hand for a couple of seconds before shaking it. "And you, Draco," was all she said.

"You really have a lovely home, here." Draco knew that most women liked to be complimented on their home. It was a safe bet that pulled off.

"Thank you," Celia replied. "May I show you around?"

Astoria suddenly looked apprehensive - she'd only just met Draco, surely she didn't want to give him the 'intentions' talk just yet.

"Certainly," Draco said, with a smile. He gave Astoria a wink to let her know it was fine and left the room with Celia who took him to the kitchen. It wasn't too big, and had a country style, with rustic wooden cupboards and work tops and a little window with a view of the picturesque back garden. Celia watched Draco as he looked around.

"Not quite what you're used to at the manor, I'm guessing," Celia said to Draco.

"Oh, I don't live there any more," Draco told her. She raised her eyebrows in surprise. "I have a small house of my own. In London."

Celia was somewhat shocked. "Did it not suit you, living in a mansion?" Her tone was not entirely friendly but Draco wasn't thrown.

"I had no desire to stay living there after I'd finished school. For me, a house isn't about its size. It's about making it a home." He made his way to the sink, which was placed in front of the window, and looked out onto the garden. "I would say my favourite feature of a house is the garden." He turned his back on the window, facing Celia, confident he was already making a good impression.

"I do love a spot of gardening," she told him. Draco nodded appreciatively.

"What are you making for dinner, may I ask?"

"Roast lamb, with all the trimmings. One of our favourites," Celia answered.

"Well it smells excellent. Would you like a hand preparing anything?" Draco offered. "I love to cook, so... it wouldn't be any trouble..."

Again, Celia raised her eyebrows in surprise. Not only because she didn't have the Malfoy boy down as the type who could look after himself, but because he seemed like the pleasant young man Daphne had told her he was. Maybe she had jumped to conclusions about him. She gave him a small smile.

"I think I might have been wrong about you," Celia said, slowly. There was a long pause broken by Draco's awkward laughter. He had rather been hoping Astoria's mother's opinion of him wouldn't get brought up.

"Well," he said, scratching his cheek subconsciously. "Let's not jump to conclusions, but I think you might have been wrong, too."

At that moment Astoria appeared in the kitchen doorway, her eyes darting from Draco to her mother. "Everything okay?" she asked.

"Yeah."

"Yes, everything's fine, love. Draco's just offered to help me with dinner and I was just about to tell him that he should go and join you in the lounge. I know you've been pining for him for a few days now..."

"Mum!" Astoria moaned, cringing. What was it with her family and making her look stupid in front of Draco?

"Oh, come on. You haven't stopped talking about hi-"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever!" Astoria waved her hand dismissively at her mum's words and started flapping Draco, who was laughing, out of the kitchen.

"Go and introduce him to everyone," Celia told Astoria, who was surprised to see her mum with a hint of a fond smile on her face. Wow, Draco really was good at impressing people.

As Draco made his way to the lounge, Astoria looked back at her mum as she went to leave. Celia smiled at her youngest daughter and gave a nod, which Astoria took as her silent approval of her new boyfriend. Smiling and nodding a thank you in response, Astoria followed Draco into the lounge, leaving her mother to continue preparing dinner.

"Everyone," Astoria called over her family's chatter in the lounge. "This is Draco." Then she introduced each of her family members in turn, Draco shaking each of their hands politely. Astoria's little cousin, Caitlyn, made her way over to Draco, looked up at him and announced "You have pretty hair. Can I play with it?"

"Erm," Draco wasn't sure how to react as everyone laughed. He had never had to interact with such a young child at any point in his life, except when he himself was that age, but he supposed he should at least try, considering he would like to have children of his own one day. He knelt down so that he was a similar height to the five year old girl and said "I don't think that will be very exciting, but how about a game of exploding snap?"

"Oh, yay! I like you!" the little girl said. Draco was quickly learning that children were very straight to the point and he found it highly amusing.

"Is, er, is that okay?" he said, looking from Astoria to her aunty Annette, Caitlyn's mother.

Annette nodded. "Feel free to rise to the challenge of entertaining her. If you can hold her attention past ten minutes, you'll be coming around to babysit, no arguments."

Draco laughed a little nervously. What the hell was he getting himself into? He didn't have a clue about keeping a child entertained, especially a girl. Astoria's other young cousin, Kayden, was only two and was sat amusing himself with wooden building blocks. Oh well, Draco liked a challenge. And besides, Celia was sure to warm to him even more if she saw him bonding with a child - all women love that kind of thing.

As Draco sat cross legged on the floor with Caitlyn playing exploding snap, Daphne watched on, smiling. At a very young age, her and Draco had shared a couple of stolen kisses together, some time in their second year at Hogwarts. They hadn't meant anything, as the pair of them had never been attracted to each other, they'd just fancied it at the time. As they had got a little older, Daphne had started to see Draco a bit like her brother and now she felt like that doubly so. And she was very happy for him and her sister. Admittedly, they had only been together two and a half months but they seemed to be made of strong stuff and Daphne had a feeling they would last.

Some time later, Celia began to bring through the plates for dinner; the room was a lounge-come-dining-room and so they would eat in the same room, around the large table. Draco, who had been beaten miserably by Caitlyn at exploding snap, followed his girlfriend into the kitchen to assist with bringing through the dinner things.

"How am I doing?" Draco asked in a whisper, when they were alone.

Astoria gave him a smile with raised eyebrows as if to say 'you know perfectly well how you're doing.'

"You're doing fine! More than fine!" she told him truthfully. Draco breathed a sigh of relief that he wasn't the only one who thought so. Astoria put her arms around her boyfriends neck, Draco's wound their way around Astoria's waist, and the couple kissed.

"Why does it feel like I haven't seen you in a lifetime when it's only been a matter of days?" Draco mumbled. Astoria smiled in response, then shrugged. "Basically," Draco went on. "I've not paid you much attention so far. How about you come back to mine later? Would be good to spend some time together."

Astoria bit her lip. "Hmm, I'd have to check with mum, but I'd love to." Draco gave an understanding nod and with one last kiss, they made their way through to the lounge with the remainder of the food.

The atmosphere around the dinner table was far more pleasant than Draco had expected before he'd arrived. Admittedly, he had believed he would be able to convince Astoria's family that he isn't a bad person, eventually, but he didn't think it would have been this easy. Caitlyn had demanded that Draco be the one to cut up her lamb into little pieces for her because she had deemed him a 'very nice man.' Draco had even engaged in conversation with Astoria's slightly senile grandma, Etta, who had asked Draco what his favourite Celestina Warback ballad is. Daphne had laughed most raucously - she knew perfectly well that Draco didn't know a single Celestina Warback song, because all he listened to was rap and the kind of love songs which are actually songs about sex but are poorly attempting to disguise themselves as love songs. Draco had avoided the question most tactfully by feigning great interest in Etta's favourite Celestina songs.

After dinner, everyone sat around chatting while Caitlyn kept herself amused with her toys. Draco had found the young girl very amusing, but he was glad she hadn't wanted another snap tournament. He was happily relaxed on a sofa with Astoria and Daphne, listening and occasionally joining in with conversation. Eventually it became dark outside and it was time for Caitlyn to go to bed. As the family were staying over, Astoria had given up her room for the child. Draco had just returned from the bathroom when Caitlyn was making her way towards the door. She stopped when she reached him and hugged his leg tightly.

"Please come again," she said.

Draco laughed. "Okay, kid," he said, ruffling her hair. "Night night."

After a couple more hours relaxing and several different tipples, each with a different member of Astoria's family, Draco decided it was time to head back home. He stood up from the sofa and stretched - he thought this was a subtle way of indicating it was time he left. He turned to Celia.

"Mrs Greengrass, as Caitlyn is staying in Astoria's room, we were thinking that she could come and stay at mine tonight. Only if that's okay, of course. It's just that she hasn't seen my place yet and, well, we'd like to spend some time together before we go back to school."

Astoria watched nervously for her mother's reaction. After a few moments considering the proposition, Celia gave a nod of approval for the second time that day.

"Thank you," Draco said.

"There's one condition though, Draco," Celia warned him. He waited for her to elaborate. "It's Celia. Mrs Greengrass makes me feel as though I'm at work and that's a feeling I could do without."

"Oh, sorry, Mrs Gree- Celia," Draco said. Astoria rose from the sofa, kissed her mum on the cheek and went to gather a few things to take to Draco's. She was so excited, she wanted to leave as soon as possible. She was going to _his_ house. Draco's house. Seven months ago they had barely spoken to each other, now he had been greatly welcomed by her family and she was off to stay at his house, with him, alone. She had a spring in her step as she made her way back downstairs with an overnight bag filled with things.

"Thank you ever so much for the wonderful dinner," Draco said, shaking Celia's hand as he and Astoria prepared to travel using floo.

"It's no problem. It was nice to meet you," Celia replied, sincerely. "And Draco. I'm sorry about what I wrote in the letter. You're a very nice young man and David would have liked you."

The whole room went silent - that was the first time Celia had used her late husband's name in a very long time.

"Thank you," Draco said again, smiling. He bade goodnight to everyone else in the room, gave Daphne a hug, and with that, he and Astoria disappeared into the green flames with Belgravia as their destination.


	18. Seventeen: Can't Fight Your Feelings

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: _Can't Fight Your Feelings_

As soon as Draco and Astoria arrived at Draco's house, he started showing her around. The first thing she noticed was how immaculate the place was; the lounge, kitchen, bedrooms, bathroom were all gleamingly clean. Astoria explored every room with interest. Although her and Draco had been together for over two months, sometimes, it still didn't feel real and she felt like pinching herself incase she wasn't actually in his home with him all to herself.

Draco watched her as she peered around every room he opened the door to. As they reached his bedroom, he smiled to himself, remembering the photograph of him and Astoria he had had framed and put by his bed. He opened the door for Astoria.

"And finally, my room," he said. She walked in slowly, looking around. It wasn't long before she noticed the photo which stood beside his bed. She made her way over to the bedside table, picking up the photo and smiling. She ran her fingers along the carved wooden frame.

"When did you get this done?" she turned to him and asked.

"Only a few days ago," Draco told her honestly.

"It's so lovely," she said in a quiet voice, still smiling.

Draco walked over to her and they both sat down on his bed. "So, what do you think of my place?" he enquired.

"I love it!" Astoria replied. "I absolutely love it."

Draco grabbed her and they both fell back and started laughing. Then Draco leaned in and captured Astoria's lips in a kiss. "Then perhaps you ought to stay longer than just one night?" he whispered.

"I'll see what I can do," Astoria said, grinning.

They both lead, staring up at the ceiling, Draco's arm around Astoria. "Would be nice to spend a few days together out of school. We're in London, we could do anything you like..."

Astoria laughed. "Draco, you sound like you're trying to convince me. I'm not the one who needs convincing..."

Draco rolled his eyes at his own stupidity. "Oh, yeah, sorry," he said. "I'm so used to just doing what I want that I forget. Stupid, I know."

Astoria giggled and snuggled in closer to Draco, and the pair just lay in silence for a while, content with each other's company. "Would you like a drink or anything?" Draco finally broke the silence.

"Hmm, do you have any wine?" Astoria asked, cheekily.

"Well, it just so happens that I do," Draco confessed. "However, I seem to recall that you don't come of age until next month so if I ply you with alcohol... Well, that would be very wrong of me." He tried to remain sounding genuine but the incredulous look on Astoria's face was too funny and he started laughing. Astoria punched him on the arm playfully, squealing.

"Come on, young lady," Draco said, standing and scooping Astoria off of the bed easily, and carrying her downstairs to the kitchen cupboard where he kept his stash of alcohol.

"Red or white?" he asked.

"Definitely white. If I have red I'll be out of it in no time."

Draco turned to his girlfriend, a smirk playing on his lips. "Don't look at me like that, Draco! You know very well you don't have to get me drunk to do what you have in your dirty mind!"

Draco laughed loudly. "Dirty mind? Who was the one who couldn't wait to get me into bed a couple of months ago?" He loved so much to wind Astoria up.

"Hey, you dick! You're _such _a dick!" she retaliated as he reached into the top cupboard for a couple of wine glasses. She started laughing as he turned back to face her. Draco walked over to her, holding the wine and the glasses, and lead her into the lounge. He lit the room dimly and put on some soft music in the background as Astoria made herself comfortable on the couch. He placed the glasses down on the small table and poured them both a whole glass of wine each before seating himself next to Astoria.

"Here's to a successful day," Draco said, holding up his glass and looking toward his girlfriend as she raised her glass to his.

"Cheers," she said, giggling and taking a sip of wine. Draco noticed how the light was reflecting in her eyes, she looked so beautiful. He slowly took a mouthful of wine, thinking to himself how, despite everything that had happened to him, right now he couldn't really be any more lucky. And Astoria had made him so happy. Not only was she beautiful, but she was smart, funny and caring. He had truly landed on his feet.

They sat and chatted freely for a while, not noticing how late it was getting. It wasn't long before the bottle of wine lay empty on the coffee table, each of them clutching their glasses with a mere inch of wine left between them. When the conversation temporarily dried up, they just sat looking at each other and smiling. Draco knew in his heart that he had completely fallen for Astoria, there was no way back. He had mixed feelings about it; on one hand he couldn't have been happier. On the other hand, he was scared of his feelings. Scared of being hurt, let down, everything he had experienced in the past. He just had to try and overcome the fear.

He made a joke, accusing Astoria of being drunk, which she profusely denied, though she couldn't stop giggling. That was when he said it. He had no idea how she would react and he had never intended on saying it. He just did.

"I love you."

His words were greeted with a stunned silence. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest. Though he tried to tell himself it didn't matter, he was genuinely scared of her rejecting his feelings. This was all new to him - he had never loved anyone and he had never told anyone he loved them.

As Astoria looked at him, he looked right back. He wanted her to know that he meant it, whether she loved him or not. She opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. The truth was, only a couple of weeks ago she had confessed to Daphne that she thought she had fallen in love with Draco. The sisters had then had a really long conversation about how Astoria shouldn't say anything. Daphne knew Draco better than Astoria did, and she had told her sister that, when it comes to emotions, Draco is a bit 'messed up.' She had told Astoria that, even if he did fall in love with her, it would probably be a very long time before he told her. Astoria hadn't minded, she had understood. But Draco had just told her he loves her. Daphne had been completely wrong.

The silence became a little too long for Draco's liking. That could only mean that Astoria didn't love him, that he had said it too soon. Damn emotions. The one time he had felt something positive and now he was starting to regret it.

"Right, anyway," he said, awkwardly, after a minute or so of Astoria not saying anything. It was a lot for her to take in after everything her sister had assured her of.

He stood up, collecting the empty wine bottle from the table as he did so and making his way over to the lounge door.

"Draco," Astoria said in a quiet voice. He didn't respond, he continued walking to the door. "Draco," Astoria said again, a little more insisting, this time. Draco stopped by the door and turned to face her reluctantly. He felt like an idiot.

"I love you, too," Astoria said, certainly. He stood and stared at her as she made her way over to join him by the door.

"I love you, too," she repeated, more slowly than before. As Draco remained staring at her, she couldn't help the smile which spread across her face.

"What?" Draco prompted, wanting to hear her say it one more time.

"I said I love you too, you big idiot!"

Within seconds, Draco had cast aside the wine bottle and Astoria had pounced on him. He lifted her, her legs wrapping around his waist, and they kissed passionately. Draco slammed her into the wall a little harder than he meant to, but she was fine, they were both completely lost in each other. Draco was kissing down her neck, his mouth working fast. Then, without putting her down, he made his way upstairs to his bedroom. He'd just said and heard the words that he had feared for years and it had felt right. There was no way that he wasn't going to act upon them.

The couple tore each other's clothes off eagerly, and after little contemplation, they made love, Astoria taking control. Draco loved it when she did. He couldn't tear his eyes away from her as she repeatedly grinded herself onto him. His hands were roaming all over her body; her back, her boobs, her bum. When they were both finished, Astoria collapsed onto the bed next to Draco and before they fell asleep Draco realised that, not only did he love this girl, but he couldn't really imagine not having her around.

Draco and Astoria had spent the next three days together seeing many of London's sights as well as a shopping trip to Diagon Alley. Draco had taken a little convincing with the sight seeing, as he wasn't over enamored at being surrounded by muggles. However, it hadn't been long before Astoria had talked him round and they had enjoyed an early morning stroll around Hyde Park as well as a meal in Covent Garden and even a trip to the theatre. Astoria had been so happy that Draco had completely forgotten the muggle thing, and totally relaxed. He had wanted her to have a good time and she did.

However, it wasn't long until they had to return to school and that meant exams were looming. Draco was confident, he had worked hard this year, but that didn't mean he was looking to the exams. Nor was he looking forward to the end of the year, which drew ever closer. If the truth be told, he really didn't want to leave Hogwarts. He had had such a good year, especially since he and Astoria had been together, and he felt a sadness that it was about to end. He had absolutely no doubt that returning to school had been the right decision for him. Leaving school meant the he had to throw himself into the real world of work and although he wasn't scared of hard graft, he was scared that his reputation would make it extremely difficult for him to find a job.

Many classes throughout April were revision sessions. They were relaxed, which was fairly nice. However, McGonagall had come to the decision that they should be split into different groups than what they were used to, in order to get them into a frame of mind which would, according to her, prepare them for the workplace where 'you do not get to choose to work with your friends.' Out of everyone in the class, Draco had most dreaded being pared with Pansy, though he was sure McGonagall was smart enough to realise that was never going to work.

On the day of class the pairs were announced. Draco was paired with Granger. He wasn't ecstatic at the though, but he wasn't as bothered as he would have been a couple of years ago. And anyway, he would rather her than her idiot boyfriend. Though he had been on borderline amicable terms with Potter throughout their final year, basically meaning that they kept out of each other's way and spoke when they had to, he and Weasley had never reached that stage and had still showcased their hatred for each other at several points during the year.

Weasley had protested loudly over Draco being placed with his girlfriend, bringing up the fact that Draco had been racist towards her in their younger years. Granger herself, however, had expressed no concern at the pairing and McGonagall had told Weasley to 'grow up and put the past behind him.' Draco had smirked broadly at that.

That afternoon, he and Granger worked well together, both being polite and helping the other out where needed. Weasley had spent large amounts of the lesson glaring across the classroom at him which he had found highly amusing. When the bell signaled the end of class, Draco and Granger had packed away their things, and with a polite 'see you round,' had parted ways. Draco found that they could get along if they had to, but it would never be anything more than that. He wouldn't want it to be.

In no time at all, April 16th came around - Astoria's birthday. Draco had an early morning revision session that day, and so had left Astoria a card on his pillow and had kissed her on the forehead as she slept, before making his way to the great hall for a filling breakfast of bacon, sausage, mushrooms, egg and toast. He needed a lot to eat to keep him going through the long day ahead of him. Unfortunately he wouldn't be seeing Astoria until the evening. He knew that she didn't mind but he minded - he really wished there was a way around it. The card he had left her had read

_Ria,_

_Smile when you wake up because I'm thinking of you._

_I hope you have a wonderful day, and I wish I could be with you for more of it._

_Happy birthday._

_I hope all of your dreams come true, now and always._

_All my love,_

_Draco xx_

_Ps. Present to follow!_

Draco had carefully selected a present for Astoria's coming-of-age birthday and he was really hoping that she would like it. He had spent many hours browsing for something which he thought she would love. He took out a fine, deep green jewellery box from his inside pocket and inspected the item he had chosen for the hundredth time since he had bought it. He was fairly confident with his choice. He stowed the box away again, finished his breakfast and made his way begrudgingly to potions, wishing he was still cuddled up in bed with his girlfriend.

The day, much to Draco's relief, went quickly. That evening, he, Daphne and the rest of the gang sat together in the great hall. He was refusing to eat until Astoria got there, waiting for her to arrive. After a quarter of an hour, Draco spotted Astoria making her way into the hall, closely followed by some friends where he spotted Albany. Perhaps, Draco thought, Albany had finally seen sense and seen Xanthe for the cow she really is. Draco had no idea how her and Astoria had ever become friends.

Astoria skipped over to Draco when she saw him, throwing her arms around his neck.

"Thank you so much for my card," she beamed.

Draco hugged her back, hard. He breathed in the vague scent on her hair, which he would often smell on his clothes and instantly be reminded of her.

"Happy birthday!" he told her. "I really wish I could have seen you more today." He was still holding her tightly. Astoria could tell he was disappointed.

"Hey, it doesn't matter," she told him, as they stopped hugging and Astoria sat down next to him, her friends sitting on the other side of her. "How about you relax on the revising one day this weekend and we can spend some time together?"

"Sounds good to me," Draco sounded keen.

"Happy birthday, sis!" Daphne exclaimed. It must have been a record in how long it took her to speak, because she didn't normally wait that long. She passed a present and card across the table as the rest of the Slytherins wished her a happy birthday. Astoria opened it eagerly - her sister, as well as having a talent for putting her foot in her mouth, had an exceptional talent for buying presents. This time, Astoria wasn't let down. The package contained an elegantly decorated bottle of her favourite perfume, several bars of Honeyduke's dark chocolate (also her favourite) and a subscription to the Quibbler, of which Draco was still utterly bemused that she read and often passed sarcastic comment on. He snorted at the subscription gift, which Astoria pointedly chose to ignore.

Draco withdrew his present to Astoria from his inside pocket, where it had spent the whole day.

"Happy birthday, babe," he said, again, kissing her on the cheek and passing her the green box. Daphne eyes widened at the sight of the box, obviously eager to know what Draco had bought for her sister.

Astoria opened the box slowly to reveal the most beautiful piece of jewellery she had ever seen; an elegant silver bracelet which took the shape of a snake, obviously representative of their house. The eyes of the snake were sparkling, deep green emeralds and tiny diamonds were encrusted along the whole length of the snakes body. Her eyes completely lit up. It was the most beautiful thing anyone had ever given her. She turned to Draco who was smiling.

"So you like it?" he asked, though he knew the answer just by the look on her face.

"Draco, I love it. I absolutely love it. It's beautiful." Laying the box down on the table, she flung her arms around Draco for the second time in five minutes, but this time she didn't want to get go. She could only hazard a guess at how much thought he had put into the gift. She didn't know what she was expecting to receive from Draco, but she was sure it wasn't anything as amazing as the bracelet. "Thank you so much."

Draco chuckled. "You're very welcome."

Astoria's friends, who had passed the box amongst themselves for a better look while Draco and Astoria had been hugging, passed it back to Astoria.

"Shall I put it on for you?" Draco offered. Astoria nodded eagerly in response, removing it carefully from the box and holding it out to Draco, who took it as Astoria held out her wrist. He secured it tightly and it fit perfectly. Astoria couldn't stop smiling.

There was an excited buzz around the Slytherin table for the rest of the evening as the filled up on whatever magnificent food was in sight. Once all their plates were clean, there was an attempt to sing Happy Birthday, all be it a poor one; no-one in their direct company was a good singer. Astoria appreciated it all the same. All of a sudden, Draco stood up, picking up his glass from the table and clearing his throat.

"Oh god, Malfoy speech!" Adrian groaned upon noticing Draco standing up.

"Speeeeeeeeeech!" Blaise chanted in a low voice which echoed around the hall slightly.

As Draco began to speak, Pansy walked past the group, casting them all a scathing look, particularly Draco. Astoria couldn't help but smile to herself as she looked from Pansy, back up to her boyfriend.

"I'd like to propose a toast to the beautiful Astoria," he announced. "The best friend," he indicated towards her friends - "sister," he nodded in Daphne's direction - "and by far, the best girlfriend anyone could ask for. You're seventeen now, so I think it's highly appropriate we take a night off from working tonight and get completely drunk!" Everyone cheered. "Which is why I've hidden a stash of booze in the common room for us to get merry tonight!" He winked across the table at Blaise who was shaking his head at his unbelievable best friend. "Astoria, happy birthday, and I love you."

Again, his words were greeted by a stunned silence, however, this time he wasn't bothered. Astoria hadn't found it necessary to tell anyone that Draco had told her he loved her. It was obviously a big deal for him, and it was for her, too. It was personal. She didn't want to go talking about it like it was a bit of gossip. The fact that he had said it in front of his friends, and her friends, surprised her greatly, but she'd never been happier. Daphne looked at Draco as though she didn't even know who he was. After all, he had just completely blown her theory out of the water. Blaise, Adrian and Theo were also staring i shock - they had always teased Draco for his lack of emotions and they had all thought it would be many a year before they heard him say those three words to anyone, if at all.

Once the silence disappeared, everyone began making their way down to the common room, Draco and Astoria with their arms around each other. Just before they reached the entrance to the common room, Albany approached them.

"I just wanted to say, sorry for siding with Xanthe. I guess I only did it because it made my life easy. She's wrong about you, Draco, and wrong about you as a couple. You're perfect together."

"Thanks, Albany," Astoria said gratefully, hugging her old friend, while Draco nodded his head in appreciation.

That night, it all went down in the Slytherin common room. One thing was for sure, they were all plied with way too much alcohol. Astoria was having the best birthday she'd ever had and it was all thanks to Draco. He really was amazing.

The party went on until late in the evening. Daphne and Blaise were snogging the faces off of each other, as usual - it would have been disappointing if they'd've broken the pattern, after all. Draco was sure that, one day, when they were ready, they would be together, but it was obvious that neither of them were prepared to settle down just yet. Theo was absolutely drunk out of his mind, which admittedly didn't take a lot, and was embarrassing himself by attempting to chat up every one of Astoria's friends who got within a ten metre radius of him. Draco was watching as Astoria happily chatted to everyone, proudly showing her off her bracelet to anyone who gave her the chance to. All in all, the night was a great success and Astoria fell asleep that night, certain that she'd had the best birthday she'd ever had and that it would be pretty hard to beat. Now all she had to do was make sure she made Draco's birthday, in a couple of months, equally as good.


	19. Eighteen: I'm Not a Normal Guy

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: _I'm Not a Normal Guy_

Exam time soon arrived. Draco found himself working constantly throughout the beginning of May, which meant he had very little time to see Astoria. He knew it would be worth it in the end, though. Every day that he wasn't sitting a NEWT he would awake at seven o'clock in the morning and would not return to the common room until at least nine at night, after spending all day sat in the library studying. If there was one thing his younger self had never imagined, it would have been himself turning into a Hermione Granger type. However, this was very much what had happened to him over the last few days.

One night, he and Nott took over a large table in the library, open books spread all over the place, parchment out, covered in scribbles of things to remember. Draco took a moment to relax - he'd had his potions final that afternoon, and had been studying for Transfiguration ever since, and was starting to feel a headache coming on - when he saw Blaise and Daphne approaching the table, holding hands. Draco cockily raised an eyebrow at this display of affection.

"Oh yeah, what's going on here?" he asked. Theo quickly looked up from the book he was reading, having to know what Draco was talking about.

Daphne laughed. "Well, umm, we thought, you know... we thought we'd give it a go." She didn't seem over enthralled about her new relationship, but merely content. Draco struggled to contain the urge to snort with laughter, as his best friend looked equally as enthusiastic. He quickly composed himself.

"Wow." His eyebrows were raised. He'd intended on saying something more than just 'wow' but he couldn't really think of anything else to say. He had been right in thinking they'd end up together but he hadn't thought they'd do it just for the sake of it, as it seemed they were doing now. "Well, umm, congratulations," he forced.

"You can go on double dates now!" Theo exclaimed, out of nowhere. All three of the others turned to look at him.

"Nott, you are so... _gay_," Blaise said.

"Fuck off, Zabini, I am not gay!" Theo said, furiously.

"Then stop saying gay bullshit!" Blaise responded. Draco was wondering whether Theo would ever learn to just keep his mouth shut. It seemed that whatever he said, he just got ridiculed for it.

"If you must know, I'm taking Pansy out after the exams have finished, so I think that pretty much proves I'm _not. Gay_," Theo emphasised the last two words heavily.

Draco stared across the table at him. "You're taking Pansy out?"

"Yeah, Malfoy. And what? Don't tell me you've still got feelings for her?" Theo laughed at the idea of being able to rub something in Draco's face.

"Don't be stupid, of course I haven't," Draco spat. "I'd rather drop dead than go anywhere with _her_. I just think you're being a bit desperate. It's embarrassing."

"Desperate? How long were you two together? Two years, wasn't it? So what, you were desperate that whole time?"

"No, mate, it's pretty desperate to go out with a friends ex. It's weird, man. I dunno, it's like you're trying to be me or something..."

Theo flushed a dull red as Blaise laughed. He started packing up his books. He was absolutely sick of being on the receiving end of Draco and Blaise's ridicule. Upon finishing putting his stuff away he said to Draco "Maybe you're just worried than I'll make a better boyfriend than you ever did." He started to leave as Draco burst out laughing, barging past Blaise on his way.

"Nott, aren't you a virgin?" Draco called after him. Theo didn't respond, disappearing from sight as Draco continued laughing to himself.

"Draco, you're a bit harsh on him sometimes," Daphne scorned, taking a seat opposite him. "I mean, so what if he's a virgin?"

Draco sneered. "In the words of your boyfriend, Pansy is a complete sex addict. The kid doesn't stand a chance."

Daphne laughed. "It's good to see that old Draco is still in there."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Draco snapped, defensively. Daphne looked a bit shocked at his abruptness.

"I just mean... You know, you're being a cocky little shit like you used to be. I didn't mean anything to do with..."

Draco shook his head dismissively. "Sorry," he apologised. "I didn't mean to snap. I've been working non stop for days, it's finally getting to me."

Daphne reached over and gave Draco's hand an understanding squeeze as Blaise pulled out a chair and joined them at the table.

"Look, you don't have an exam tomorrow, right?" Daphne asked. Draco shook his head in response. "Why don't you have a couple of hours off, go and find Ria? She's really missing you."

Draco couldn't help but smile. "Really?"

"Really! She wouldn't stop going on about you. But she won't say anything to you because she doesn't want to distract you from your work."

Draco thought about it for a moment before letting out a groan and beginning to pack away his things. "Okay, okay, I give in," he said. When all his books were packed he stood and made his way to leave, turning when he was at the end of the row of book shelves and calling "Hey, guys!" Blaise and Daphne both turned to look at him. "Nott was right, though. We should double date!" He winked, trying not to laugh at their bemused faces, and left.

The rest of Draco's exams came and went. There wasn't any that he felt he'd done particularly badly in, apart from a few stupid mistakes he'd made during his charms practical. Other than that, everything went pretty smoothly and he felt confident. Fortunately, they didn't have to wait until the summer holidays to find our their results. Because of their circumstances, everyone who came back to retake their final year had their exams fast tracked to be marked as soon as possible so that they were able to graduate in June and, hopefully, find work as quickly as possible. Some, such as Potter and Weasley, already had careers as aurors mapped out for them. Draco was banking on finding it a little more difficult to find himself a job now the Malfoy name was mud.

Many students had left Hogwarts when the exams were over. Draco, however, chose to stay on so that he could spend some time with Astoria. Next year, Astoria would be at school for her final year and he would not be there. He struggled to hide the fact that this wasn't something he was looking forward to.

On June the fifth, Draco awoke to Astoria gently nudging him in the ribs. He opened his eyes slowly, grumbling. "What...why are you waking me up?" he complained, sleepily.

"It's your birthday," Astoria reminded him.

"Huh?" He was still in a post sleep haze, his brain wasn't yet fully functioning.

"It's your birthday, stupid!" Astoria said, laughing at him.

"Oh...yeah," Draco said, his voice croaky. He rubbed his eyes and opened them properly to see Astoria looking up at him, her beautiful eyes wide, a smile on her lips. Then Draco's eyes wandered downwards to where her cleavage was exposed, and - oh dear god - she was wearing a dark green, satin chamise which barely covered anything. Suddenly Draco felt very much awake in more ways than one. Astoria flashed him a grin, and then got off of the bed, and grabbed her dressing robe, covering herself up.

"Wha - why? Why are you doing that to me?" Draco demanded. His erection was straining inside his boxers. Astoria merely smiled at him, not saying anything. "It's my birthday," Draco continued moaning at her, desperately.

"Shut up and put this on," she said, throwing him a dressing robe and grabbing a couple of towels off of the back of a chair.

"What are we doing?" Draco asked, slowly. Astoria made her way back over to the bed, and straddled Draco, leaning down and whispering in his ear "Albany gave me the password to the prefect's bathroom." She didn't have to say anything else. Draco let out another groan, his eyes slightly wide with surprise. Astoria gave him a questioning look.

"Oh, come on. Don't tell me you and Pansy never did that when you were prefects?" she asked in a whisper, disbelievingly. Draco swallowed hard and shook his head furiously. "Never," he told her truthfully. Astoria really was surprised.

"Well, what are you waiting for, then?" She winked at him, and in seconds he was pulling the dressing robe around himself quicker than you could say pumpkin pasty, and the pair swiftly made their way to the bathroom.

Once there, Astoria let the taps of the huge bath-come-swimming-pool run, adding scents and bubbles. Draco, taking off his robe and boxers, sat on the edge with his legs hanging in the water. He watched hungrily as Astoria slowly removed what little clothes she had on. He couldn't have torn his eyes away if he'd wanted to - she really did have the perfect body. She slowly approached the edge of the bath and slipped into the water gracefully. Draco hastened to join her, though with less grace and much more of a splash.

Eagerly, the pair's lips crashed together, their tongues meeting each other's instantly. Draco's hardness had already returned and Astoria was impatiently gripping at it. Draco ran his fingers through her hair, ensuring that she couldn't escape the kiss. He moaned slightly against her lips as she gripped him, then his hands began to roam all over her body. It wasn't long at all until his fingers found the place Astoria had bee so impatient for him to touch. Her gentle moans made Draco even harder in her hand.

They moved through the water until Draco had her pinned up against the wall of the bath, where she wrapped her legs around his waist and he pushed inside of her, his legs shaking slightly. Draco and Astoria began to thrust their hips in unison; he was filling her up and she loved it.

The water was at a fairly high temperature, so both of them were wet not only from the water, but from sweat, their hair sticking unattractively to their foreheads. But both were too lost in the moment to even care. The setting was, in a way, romantic, but it was also completely hot. How Draco had never thought of this when he was with Pansy, he'd never know, but he was glad that he hadn't. It would have been wasted on them.

Astoria began eagerly thrusting her hips faster, her small hands gripping his hair, pulling a bit. Draco's breathing was heavy, and low groans of pleasure kept escaping his lips as his hands firmly gripped Astoria's bum. "Oh, Ria, fuck... Yeah, yeah" he moaned in a husky voice.

The pair went on making love for a great length of time. Draco thought that perhaps the feeling of the water delayed their orgasms, though he couldn't for a second think why. After half an hour, he felt a familiar sensation wash over him, as he lost all control and came inside Astoria who was panting in her efforts. She put her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly as he shook through his orgasm. Then he pulled out of her, lifting her out onto the side of the bath and disappearing between her thighs where he kissed her, licked her, until she came too. It was probably the hottest sex he had ever had.

He pulled Astoria back in to join him in the hot, bubbly water, and they kissed more gently this time.

"Happy birthday," she muttered against his lips and he smiled, whispering a "thank you," back.

"Come on, lie back," Draco demanded, suddenly. Astoria did as she was told, allowing herself to float atop the water. She felt Draco place his hand on the small of her back, under the water. "Close your eyes," he ordered. "It's really relaxing." Again, she did as she was told. Draco was right, it felt so nice just floating there in the silence, and knowing he was right beside her. Draco raised his free arm and ran his fingers repeatedly through her hair, lightly massaging her head. She moaned softly. It felt amazing.

After a short while, Draco pulled her back upright and they kissed once again.

"Come on, we can't stay here all day," he pointed out. "Someone's gunna come in eventually and we are gunna be so busted!"

Astoria laughed. "Come on then."

They both jumped out of the bath and dried off quickly, Astoria wrapping a towel around her soaking wet hair and pulling on her dressing robe. Draco attempted to towel his blond hair dry, dried the rest of himself and likewise, pulled on his robe.

He and Astoria spent the rest of the day together, not really doing anything in particular, but simply enjoying each other's company. Draco received a card and present from his mother, and, much to his (and Astoria's) surprise, a card from Celia. She had written:

_Draco,_

_I hope you have a good birthday. Many happy returns._

_Hope to see you again soon._

_Best wishes,_

_Celia_

"Ooh, look who's one of the family!" Daphne had teased him over lunch. Draco secretly felt rather smug, seeing as a few months ago Celia had insisted that she wanted nothing to do with him.

Over dinner, Astoria presented Draco with a black, leather bound box with silver and green ribbons wrapped around it.

"Happy birthday," she said, grinning.

"Well, what can this be?" Draco said. If he admitted it, he rather liked presents. It was one of the childlike features that remained with him, and wasn't likely to ever leave.

He carefully untied the ribbons and opened the box slowly. Inside was a magnificent, very expensive looking watch. He raised his eyebrows, incredibly impressed by his girlfriend's taste.

"Wow, Astoria," he said, still staring at the watch. "It's amazing."

Astoria leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Glad you like it," she said. "Have a look at it though... properly." She was definitely hinting at something, though Draco couldn't imagine what. He carefully prised the watch out of the velvety inside of the case, and inspected the face carefully, followed by the strap. Astoria laughed, softly. "Turn it over," she told him.

Draco turned the watch over and saw that, on the back of the face of the watch, was a tiny engraving.

A.G D.M

06/01/99

"Ria," he said, totally disbelieving of the thought she'd put into the present. It was the most amazing, thoughtful present he'd ever received and he'd been given some amazing gifts in his time. He didn't know what else to say. Astoria leaned in again, resting her head on his shoulder and smiling.

"See, it's our initials and the d-"

"Date we got together. I know," Draco said. Astoria giggled.

"Guys aren't normally good at remembering things like that."

"Well, I guess I'm not a normal guy, then," Draco said, laughing and putting his arm around her. "Thank you so much. It's brilliant. I love it." He kissed her on top of the head. "And I love you."

"I love you, too," Astoria said, softly. Draco lifted her chin with a finger and kissed her, then rested his forehead against hers.

"Seriously, I fucking love you. So much." He wasn't sure if she actually realised just how he felt about her. He loved her like he didn't even think he was capable of. It confused him. A lot. But he knew it was real. Astoria laughed.

"I fucking love you, too," she said. Draco laughed with her.

"Well, that's fucking sorted then," he finalised the conversation and pulled her into a tight hug, his brand new watch gleaming on the table.


	20. Nineteen: Graduation

CHAPTER NINETEEN: _Graduation_

A week after his birthday, Draco, along with all of his belongings, left his Slytherin dormitory for the last ever time and bade Astoria good bye. He stood at the top of the stone steps in the Slytherin common room where he had dumped all of his things ready to leave. Astoria made her way over, a sad look on her face. Neither spoke, they just hugged tightly for a minute. Draco broke the embrace, holding Astoria at arms length. He could see tears shining in her eyes. They were too stubborn to flow.

"Hey," he said, concerned. "What are the tears for?" He laughed softly at his girlfriend, though he too found the situation rather odd. Within the next week her end of year examinations would be over and they would be together again, but it still felt like a bit of the world had just ended.

Astoria laughed at herself. "I know, I'm being silly!" she said, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. "It's just weird, we'll never be in school together again. I'm not going to be seeing you every day... I guess I just got used to having you here."

Draco raised his eyebrows at her. "Ria, I'm going to be round yours so much this summer that you'll be wanting to get rid of me!" The pair laughed, but she was shaking her head furiously.

"I don't think I'll ever want that." She rubbed her eyes again.

"Come here," Draco said, and pulled her back into another hug. He held Astoria, stroking her hair with his hand, until they had been stood there for a ridiculous amount of time. "Right, I'd better get going," Draco said, breaking the hug once again. Astoria gave an understanding though unwilling nod. She knew she was being silly, she just wasn't able to snap out of it. "Oh, and I've given my spare graduation invites to Daph, by the way, so a couple more of your family will be coming along than you thought. Not like I really have anyone to come for me except mum..."

"I'm coming for you!" Astoria said defiantly. Draco laughed. She was always slightly fierce when she disagreed with something he said.

"Yeah, babe. Well, I'll see you before then anyway I expect, graduation is in two weeks and you finish in one."

Astoria nodded and smiled. "See you soon," she said, looking up towards her boyfriend with sad eyes.

"Sooner than you know," Draco said, bowing his head to kiss her on the lips, holding her chin between his thumb and finger. "And good luck with the rest of your exams. I know you'll be fine." He winked at her.

"Thanks, Draco," Astoria said, giving him one last, desperate kiss before he cast a hovering charm on his things and made his way to leave. Draco turned back at the entrance to the common room, blew a kiss to Astoria who waved back weakly, and with one last glance of the place where he had had some of the best times of his life, he left.

Draco didn't have much planned over the next few days. He'd never been needy in his life, but if he was honest, he couldn't wait for Astoria's exams to be over so he could be with her. But, for now, he had to put that to the back of his mind as he trawled the Daily Prophet for a sign of _any _job he could apply for. He had been doing so for the last twenty minutes but to no avail. He ran his fingers through his hair frustratedly. Just then, there was a tapping on the living room window. Glancing up, Draco saw Blaise's owl perched on his window sill, his yellow eyes boring into Draco, waiting to be let in.

Draco stood, stretched idly and went over to the window to let the owl in. The letter it carried was a short one.

_Draco, Leaky Cauldron tonight at 9pm. Don't sit around your house moping, get the hell out! Blaise. Ps. Love you so much baby boy, for ever and ever xxxxxxxxxxx_

Draco laughed at his best friend's ridiculous message. To be fair, though, he was moping around the house and had been ever since his return two days ago. He decided right away that he would go to the Leaky Cauldron. It would probably do him some good. He grabbed a quill from the coffee table and scribbled a reply on the same bit of parchment.

_I'll be there. Ps. Does Daphne know?! ;)_

Chuckling again, Draco reattached the letter to the owl's leg and sent him on his way.

Several hours later, Draco was dressed relatively smartly for his night out with the boys, his trouser pocket full of gold - he'd finished school forever, and though he missed Astoria, it was still an occasion to celebrate. It was going to be a heavy night.

When Draco arrived at the Leaky Cauldron, he glanced around the place. It wasn't long before he noticed Blaise sat at a table in the far corner along with Theo, Ad, Gregory Goyle, Marcus Flint and Terrence Higgs. The latter two, Draco had not seen for quite some time. He made his way over.

"Alight, boys," he said, once he reached the round table, which just about had enough room for Draco. They all looked round.

"Malfoy!" Terrence exclaimed, standing to lean across the table and shake Draco's hand. "It's been a while, mate."

"It has," Draco agreed, grasping Terrence's hand, followed by Marcus'. "Shall I get in a round?" Draco asked, generously. "Might as well, while I'm up." The six lads nodded and mumbled their thanks.

"Careful, mate," Blaise warned, before Draco departed. "Pansy's sat up there with Tracey Davis."

Draco's mind was immediately cast back to the fact that he had slept with Tracey, who had been friends with Pansy throughout their time at Hogwarts, when he and Pansy had only been apart a matter of days. He glanced over his shoulder towards the bar, spotting the two girls perched upon high stools.

"Fuck it," Draco mumbled, rolling his eyes. He made his way reluctantly over to the bar, hoping to be served before they noticed he was there. Tom was behind the bar and didn't take long at all to serve Draco, who ordered seven shots of fire whiskey and two bottles of red currant rum for them all to share. He was going to have to be very drunk if he were to be in the same room as Pansy all night, whether she noticed him or not. Unfortunately, he didn't have to wait too long at all.

"Oh my god, Draco!" Draco couldn't mistake the voice of Tracey Davis, he'd known her too long. He looked across the bar to where she was sat, opposite him, and gave a small, false smile. This really was not what he wanted. Pansy leaned across and whispered something in Tracey's ear, giving Draco a look of disdain. Tracey apparently ignored her friend's words and made her way down from her stool, walking the length of the bar and joining Draco.

"Wow, it's been ages, Draco," Tracey announced, hugging him. Draco hugged back unenthusiastically. "It certainly has." He looked back towards the table where his friends were sat, struggling to contain their laughter at his unimpressed face.

"Pansy's been telling me about what you're up to these days," Tracey informed him.

"Has she, now?" Draco said, shooting an unmistakable glare in Pansy's direction. She cockily raised an eyebrow and pointedly turned away from him.

"Yeah," Tracey confirmed. "Apparently you're all loved up now. _Really_, Draco? That's not like you."

Draco felt uncomfortable. He wished Tom would hurry up from the cellar with those bottles of red currant rum. "I'm not really the person I used to be," he said, simply.

"Obviously," Tracey said, though she was smiling. "So... Daphne's little sister?" she pressed on. Apparently she was in no such hurry to drop the subject.

"Her name's Astoria," Draco said, flatly.

"Well," Tracey said, not noticing Draco's irritated tone. "She's a lucky girl." She winked at Draco who felt himself turn slightly pink and glance in Pansy's direction.

"Umm, Trace, about that night, when we umm..."

"Had amazingly wild sex?" Tracey rushed to finish his sentence, smirking slightly.

"Umm, yeah, that night," Draco agreed, as he couldn't be bothered to argue. "Well, Pansy still doesn't know and, well, I'd rather it stayed that way."

Tracey laughed. "Don't worry, secret's safe with me," she assured him. Then she leant in and whispered "Seriously, though. By far the best sex I've _ever_ had." Draco grimaced, his face unseen by Tracey. The sex between the two of them had been very rough. Not Draco's preferred style, especially when he'd just been released from the hospital wing after a near death experience. Luckily, Tom appeared at just that moment with all of Draco's drinks on a tray.

"Ah, my drinks are here," Draco said, relieved. "Nice talking to you, Tracey," and with that, he left swiftly, not wanting her to say anything else that would make him cringe.

Once he rejoined his friends, the drink started flowing and it wasn't long at all before Draco started to feel himself becoming tipsy. He was, in all honesty, a bit of a lightweight. The same thing seemed to be happening to Pansy, as her laughter became louder and louder as the night went on - a sure sign that she was drunk and trying to get Draco's attention. Draco wasn't a fool though, and didn't look around at her once as a couple of hours passed.

The conversation around the table soon turned to Draco's love life, a subject which seemed to crop up no matter who he was with. By now, he was quite far gone and so he was freely talking about the way he felt about Astoria in such a way that was bound to embarrass him when he remembered in the morning. He took a long swig of his forth butterbeer (which he'd progressed to after the fire whiskey and red currant rum).

"Serly-seriously though," he was speaking loudly, as the lads watched him, tears of laughter brimming in their eyes. "Sireeously, I never, ever... ever never ever loved someone before I met Astoria. And, like, I'm so, so in lo - in love with her -" He didn't finish his sentence, as his face slipped from the hand he'd been resting on and he head butted the table. Raucous laughter erupted around the table as Draco remained slumped, laughing at his own stupidity. He heaved himself up again and looked at Blaise, who was sat next to him. Blaise rolled his eyes exasperatedly at his friend. If only Astoria could see him in this state.

"Bu - but guys, guys!" Draco went on. Apparently he hadn't said enough. "I'm going to TELL you something! I'm going to tell you ALL something. Are you lis... Listening?" He gazed around at the faces surrounding him, satisfied that he had all of their attention. "One day - one, one day. I'm going to get MARRIED to Astoria." He nodded as though impressed with himself. "I - I've decided that I wana marry her. I LOVE HER!"

"Okay, okay," Blaise said, resting a hand on Draco's back, using his other to prize Draco's drink away from him. "I think you've had enough mate, I think it's time we get you home."

Draco laughed at Blaise's words. Unfortunately, he'd been so loud that not only Pansy and Tracey were looking over, but everyone else in the pub, too. Draco attempted to get up from his seat but fell back down. Blaise helped him up from under the arm and maneuvered him around the rest of the Slytherins.

"I'll stay with him, guys," Blaise told the others. "Enjoy the rest of the night, yeah?" and with that he began to support Draco out of the pub. Draco gave a dramatic wave to everyone around him, giggling like a girl at his own behaviour. It was a long time since he'd been this drunk.

Once they reached the door of the pub, Blaise pushed it open but Draco stopped. He turned and looked at the bar. His eyes sought Tracey.

"TRACEY!" he yelled, once he'd found her. "HEY! TRACEY?!" She turned around, and smirked at the fact that Draco wanted her attention over anyone else's. She opened her mouth to shout back to him, but she didn't get a chance. "THAT NIGHT WE HAD SEX... IT W-WASN'T AMAZING. IT WAS AWFUL. I - I DON'T LIKE IT ROUGH, SEE. I'M MORE OF A LOVER MYSELF! I LIKE TO MAKE LOVE, NOT FUCK"

Pansy's eyed had grown wide in shock as she looked from Draco to the girl who she'd always thought was one of her best friends. Blaise turned round to look at the commotion Draco was causing.

"Okay, Tracey, what the hell?!" Pansy yelled, unable to remain calm. Tracey cast her friend a guilty look. Draco appeared gleeful. Soon, Pansy wouldn't have any friends left and it would all be down to him. Blaise groaned to himself. He hated having to be the sensible one.

"Pansy, I -" Tracey began, but Pansy shouted over her.

"You slept with Draco?! You slept. With Draco?!"

"It was once, Pansy, I swear it didn't mean anything!"

"Oh really? Well this friendship doesn't mean anything, either!" Pansy grabbed her glass of wine from the bar and slowly poured it over Tracey's head, soaking her. It wouldn't change what she'd just found out but it did make her feel a bit better. She grabbed her bag and jacket from the side, and flounced out of the bar as Tracey sat there, open mouthed, hair sticking to her hair and wine dripping from her face.

Draco giggled childishly, straining his neck to keep Tracey in his view as Blaise frog marched him out of the door. Once outside, Blaise let go of him and he slumped against a wall, still laughing at the drama he'd caused. Blaise approached him and took hold of his face, his expression stony.

"Draco! Sober up. Just stop - stop laughing! Do you think Astoria's going to be laughing when she finds out how drunk you are?"

Draco suddenly quit laughing, his face finally straight. Blaise let go of him. "She's not going to f - to find out, is she?" he asked, in the nervous tone of a child in trouble.

"Mate, of course she's going to find out. There were god knows how many people in there that know you." Draco was an idiot when he was drunk. "I mean, it's not like you caused a scene or anything..." he added sarcastically.

Draco shook himself and remained silent for a long while as though contemplating his behaviour. Then he looked towards his friend and said in an innocent sounding voice "Take me home." It looked as though he'd had all the fun he was going to have.

Blaise took hold of Draco's arm and apparated with him back to his house. He went to the kitchen, poured Draco a large glass of water and watched him drink the lot, before making sure he got up the stairs without breaking his neck. Within two minutes, Draco was flat out asleep on his bed, fully clothed, the light still on. Blaise turned out the light and made his way to the spare room, where he would spend the night.

Draco awoke the next morning with a terrible headache. He couldn't remember exactly what he'd said last night but he knew he'd been an idiot. He was sat up at the kitchen table drinking hangover potion and clutching his head when Blaise came down from upstairs and laughed at him.

"You look rough!"

"I feel worse!" Draco assured him. "Thanks for making sure I got home." Blaise shrugged off Draco's thanks.

"I would offer to stay and nurse you through the hangover but I gotta go mate, got some family shit on today."

Draco groaned. "I was meant to be seeing mum. Think I'll cancel. I don't fancy a lecture."

Blaise laughed. "Anyway, I'll see you at graduation I expect?" he said, grabbing his jacket from the stairs.

Draco grunted "Mmm, if I've recovered by then. I'm going back to bed." He rose from the chair and padded his way across the kitchen and down the hall way. "See you, mate."

As soon as Blaise pulled the door shut, Draco made his way upstairs, clutching the remains of his potion, and threw himself back in bed, pulling the duvet over his head and falling straight back to sleep.

Some eleven days later, Draco was awake bright and early for his return to Hogwarts. It was the day of his graduation. He was currently awaiting use of the bathroom; Astoria had stayed over his the night before and, so far, she had been in the bathroom for forty six minutes. Not that Draco was counting or anything. He was pacing around his room impatiently, before crossing the hall and knocking the bathroom door for the third time.

"Astoria! Whose graduation is this?"

"Yours, sweetie, why?" came Astoria's innocent reply.

"_Exactly_," Draco said. "Everyone's going to be looking at me. _Me_. Not you!"

From the opposite side of the door, Astoria was lounging in a bath tub full of bubbles, not bothering to get a move on at all. She was trying hard to suppress her giggles. Sometimes, she simply loved to wind Draco up.

"Oh, baby, come on. Give me five more minutes," she put on a whiney voice. "I'm only trying to look nice for you."

Draco caved too easily. "Right. Five more minutes! Five! Or I'm going to alohomora this door on your ass!" he threatened. Astoria giggled.

"Hey! Stop laughing!" Draco said, sternly, though he himself was smiling. He didn't feel he could ever actually be annoyed with Astoria, but it was fun to pretend just for a minute.

Seven minutes later, Astoria emerged from the bathroom and stood in the doorway to Draco's bedroom wearing nothing but a towel, her hair wound up in another. Draco loved the way she smelled when she'd just got out of the bath but he didn't have long to get ready, so he tried to block it from his mind. Astoria had a wicked smirk on her face.

"Seven minutes! You were seven! You said five!" Draco rose from the bed and gathered his towel and clean underwear into his arms.

Astoria cackled. Draco had some funny personality traits. "Draco, I think you may have some kind of disorder?" she said in a soft voice. Draco's head snapped round to look at her.

"What? What do you mean, a _disorder_?" he demanded.

"Well, some people have, umm.. slightly obsessive behaviour, babe. It's called obsessive compulsive disorder." She was only trying to wind him up, but his face relaxed instead of becoming more tense.

"Oh, yeah," he said casually. "I've always had that. Since I was a kid."

Astoria looked at him, shocked. "You mean, you actually have it?" she asked, slowly.

"Yes," Draco responded monotonously, wondering if she would let him have a shower now.

"Oh. I was only trying to wind you up."

"Failed then, didn't you," Draco said, making his way over to the door, kissing her on the forehead and pushing past her, heading for the bathroom. Just as he was safely inside the bathroom Astoria called "Oh, Draco, can I just -"

"No!" he said, instantly before closing the door quickly and locking it. Astoria laughed heartily from the other side. Despite his funny habits, Astoria had never felt the way about anyone that she felt about Draco. She just knew they were made to last.

A few hours later Draco, along with every other student who had taken an eighth year, sat in the front two rows of chairs which had been arranged outside in the sunshine, next to the lake, for the graduation ceremony. Seated by houses, and then in alphabetical order, Draco was sat between Daphne and Theodore.

The many other rows were packed out with all of the close friends and family of those graduating on that day - for the small number who were, there was certainly a big audience. Draco only had his mother and Astoria in the audience for him, but that was all the support he needed. Plus, more of Astoria's family were there supporting Daphne, so it was nice to see some more familiar faces, especially Caitlyn who was apparently Draco's number one fan.

None of them knew exactly how graduation was going to work; they supposed that their grades were going to be read out in front of everyone, as they themselves didn't even know what they had, yet. McGonagall started making her way to the front so it wasn't long until they were to find out.

"Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen," she began. "Gathered here today are the friends and family of some rather unique and special students. The first eighth graders that any school of our kind has ever seen." There was some whooping from the crowd, followed by some laughter. "Today, we shall be celebrating their success at not only enduring one of the worst wars our world has ever seen, but coming out of the other end fighting, and as this parchment tells me, achieving some excellent grades." There were murmurs amongst those receiving their results that day. "Now, I shall tell you how things are going to work... Each student has had something written about them by one of our teachers here. Their names will be called out, and the appropriate teacher will read out their statement, and then I shall be calling out their grades. If they please, the said student will then join me at the front to receive their NEWT certificates."

Draco was dreading his turn. What on earth were they going to say about him? He fiddled with his tie uncomfortably, and glanced over his shoulder towards his mother who was sat alone in one of the back rows. She caught his eye and gave him a nod as if to say 'you're going to be fine.' He turned slowly back to face the front.

McGonagall rounded up her speech and the name calling began, Draco hating the feeling of his name getting closer and closer to being called by the second. Daphne was called out (following Granger who, of course, achieved five Os). Draco listened carefully as Daphne's grades were read out and gave his friend a big hug as they discovered she'd achieved two Os, two Es and an A. She went to the front to collect her certificates, looking rather flustered.

In no time at all it was Draco's turn. His heart was pounding. From a few rows behind him, Astoria sat, hands clutched together tightly in her lap. Draco had worked so hard, she so badly wanted him to get the grades he deserved.

"The next student has always been a naturally talented wizard," McGonagall began (she had written the piece about Draco). "From the first day, we saw his potential. Excelling in transfiguration and potions from his first year, he was also able to master non verbal spells from an incredibly young age. The last two years of school weren't particularly easy for this young man." Draco looked down at his feet. Daphne reached out, took hold of his hand and gave it a squeeze. "It's not always easy to do the right thing, especially in front of others that are persuading you to do otherwise." Draco bit his nails on the hand that Daphne was not holding. "This young man deserves a lot more credit than he has ever been given. He has overcome a lot of obstacles to be here and he has, indeed, turned his life around."

Over near the back, Narcissa, knowing they were talking about her only son, had tears of pride welling in her eyes. Astoria, likewise.

McGonagall went on "His results are proof of how you can change your own life for the better, and we are extremely proud that we invited him to return this year. Mr Draco Malfoy, you received five NEWTs at grade Outstanding."

Draco's head dropped into his hands in relief and he let out the breath he'd been holding. He had heard just what he had wanted to hear. There was a buzz around him as his friends hugged him and patted him on the back. Astoria's family were cheering. Astoria was on her feet clapping, tears rolling down her cheeks. Narcissa was wiping her eyes with a tissue, clapping her son in between wiping. Draco stood slowly, squeezed past the rest of his row and made his way to the front where he shook hands with McGonagall and collected his certificates.

"Congratulations, Draco. We are so very proud of you," McGonagall said to him quietly. He smiled and thanked her appreciatively.

When he turned he noticed Astoria and his mother in the crowd, both there, both looking so proud of him. It was then that he realised, he didn't _need _anyone else there for him. These were the two people he loved and they were more than enough to keep him happy.


	21. Twenty: Surprising Words

CHAPTER TWENTY: _Surprising Words_

The rest of the graduation ceremony passed by, with no-one beating or even drawing level with Draco and Hermione's five O grades. Draco couldn't hide the fact that he was rather pleased with himself as it was obvious how people from other houses hadn't know that he was actually fairly intelligent. It was never expected that anyone could get as good a grades as Hermione Granger, whether she was muggle born or not. Draco had proved them wrong.

As the ceremony drew to a close, with Professor McGonagall thanking everyone for their attendance, the now ex-students of Hogwarts stood slowly to leave, chatting amongst each other. Draco noticed the sour face on Pansy, and couldn't stop himself from commenting. She had only received two Es, two As and a P.

"Cheer up, Pans, I'm sure they'll want to hire you in a cafe somewhere..." Draco said in a cheerful voice.

Pansy scowled and advanced towards Draco, who was smirking broadly. "I bet you think you're so clever now, don't you?" she asked, bitterly.

"Well, I don't think... I have the evidence right here," Draco idly held up his certificates and then straightened his suit.

"Guys, cut it out," said Theo, who was the only person in between the two of them.

"Tell him! He started it!" Pansy whined, clutching Theo's arm - the pair were now officially 'seeing each other' whatever that meant. This reminded Draco that he should wish Nott the best of luck. He was certainly going to need it.

"Pansy, you sound like a child," Daphne interrupted, standing at Draco's side.

"Oh, there we are! Another member of the cosy little family!" Pansy's voice was raised and people were starting to look around. She turned to find Blaise stood not far along the row of seats. "Blaise, wanna come over here? I know you're part of the family now, too. It really is very touching."

As Blaise scowled, Draco snorted with laughter. He'd always assumed that Pansy would mature one day, but it was quickly becoming apparent that she wouldn't. Or, at least, it wouldn't be any time soon.

"Pansy, just shut up will you?" Blaise said. "We've just had our graduation, all our friends and family are here, and you decide it's a good idea to start squealing and drawing attention to yourself. It's embarrassing."

Theodore opened his mouth to argue for Pansy but there was a look in his eye that said he totally agreed with what Blaise was saying. He shut his mouth again. There was nothing to be said.

"Theo, say something, will you!" Pansy whinged, hitting her 'boyfriend' with her handbag. Still, he said nothing. Draco laughed yet again, and started edging his way down the row to leave, speaking as he left. "Theodore isn't me, Pansy. He isn't going to stick up for you, and if he did, no-one would listen." As he reached the end of the row, Daphne and Blaise following him, he turned and said "Have a nice relationship," and with that, he left Pansy and Theo in each others' company.

Draco made his way over towards the back rows, his mother standing and walking towards him. He could see straight away that she'd been crying.

"Mother..." he said, awkwardly. "Why were you crying?"

"Oh, Draco, I'm so proud of you!" Narcissa pulled her son into an extremely tight hug. "Five Os! Five! We always knew you were clever!" Draco patted her on the back uncomfortably. He wasn't one for public displays of affection unless they were with Astoria, and then they didn't happen very often.

Narcissa let go of Draco and began to well up again as he shook his head at her disbelievingly. Just then, Draco heard someone call his name. He turned to see his girlfriend running across the grass to meet him. He smiled as she flung her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.

"I knew, knew, knew you could do it! You got the best!" Astoria squealed excitedly.

"Joint best," Draco reminded her, nodding in Granger's direction.

"Oh, who cares," Astoria waved her hand dismissively and stood upon her tip toes to give Draco, who was stood with his back to his mother, a kiss on the cheek. Draco laughed at how happy she was.

"By the way, you look beautiful today," he mumbled in her ear. She was wearing a floaty white dress with ballet shoes and some dainty pearl earrings, her hair tied up in a not on top of her head.

"Why, thank you," she said, curtseying to Draco who laughed at her, yet again. He'd never met anyone like this girl - which was probably why he'd never been in love before. He suddenly remembered his mother standing behind him. Oh, shit. He'd never introduced a girl to his mum. He'd never introduced his mum to a girl. Oh god. He stood to the side, removing himself from the middle of the two. He saw his mother looking Astoria up and down and became twice as nervous.

"Umm," he said, as the two women made eye contact. "Astoria, this is my mother. Mother, this is Astoria, my girlfriend." He hoped they would do the rest themselves.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs Malfoy," Astoria said confidently, politely offering a hand. Narcissa considered it for a split second and then said "Don't be silly dear, it's wonderful to meet you," before kissing her once on each cheek. Astoria giggled, slightly nervously. "And please, call me Narcissa."

"Draco's told me so much about you," Astoria informed her.

Narcissa gave me a small smile. "Has he? I'm afraid I can't say the same for you. He was always very secretive, even as a child..."

Astoria looked towards Draco and smiled. "I gathered as much," she replied. Draco knew what she was getting at, but kept his face expressionless, fiddling with the certificates which were still clutched in his hands.

"Certainly, the first I knew of your relationship was when the pair of you made the front page of the Prophet," Narcissa announced.

"Ah," Astoria exclaimed, slightly embarrassed. She had no idea how Narcissa had felt about the article. Narcissa was smiling though, so she supposed she couldn't have minded.

"These papers will write anything to sell, won't they?" Narcissa said in an understanding tone.

"Exactly what me and Draco said."

Narcissa nodded gravely then turned to Draco. A thought had occurred to her.

"Draco, darling, why don't you and Astoria come to the Manor for your dinner tonight? It would be so lovely, the three of us."

Draco caught Astoria's eye and shrugged at her as if to say 'up to you.'

"That would be lovely. Thank you so much," Astoria smiled. So far she thought she was doing pretty well and she knew she needed Narcissa on side. Draco was fiercely loyal to his mother and she didn't think there was anything in the world that could change that. "Anyway," she said, turning back to Draco. "I should get back to everyone."

Draco nodded in agreement. "Tell them I'll be over soon to say hi." He approached Astoria, put an arm on her shoulder and kissed her on the forehead. "I love you."

"I love you more," she said, playfully. She knew he didn't like it when she said that. Draco pretended to scowl at her as she said to his mother "Goodbye, and thanks again for the dinner invite. See you tonight," gave Draco a cheeky grin and left to rejoin her family.

Draco stood chatting with his mum for a while. She was just saying what a good job they'd made of getting Hogwarts back to the way it was when Blaise come over to say hello.

"Narcissa, so good to see you again," he charmed her, swooping in and kissing her on both cheeks. She giggled softly like a schoolgirl. Blaise gave Draco a deliberate wink, as Draco glared back at him. There was a long running joke between the Slytherin boys that Draco's mum was a rather attractive lady and Draco hated it. As he knew Blaise would take it no further than a kiss on the cheek, he left them chatting so he could go and say hi to Astoria's family.

"Ah, Draco," Celia exclaimed upon his arrival, gesturing with open arms. "Congratulations on your results, I bet you're so pleased!" She gave him a friendly pat on the arm.

"Thank you very much. I am indeed. Very pleased." There was no point in lying.

"Well done, kid," said Astoria's booming uncle Jasper, holding out a hand.

"Thank you, sir," Draco said, taking the man's hand, resulting in his own being thoroughly shaken.

Just then, Professor McGonagall approached, resting a hand on Draco's shoulder. Draco turned to face her.

"I have some good news, Mr Malfoy," she informed him. Draco looked intrigued as the pair of them stepped away from the others.

"Am I correct in thinking that you still desire a career relating to flying?"

"Absolutely." Draco couldn't think of anything else he'd rather do.

"Well, it just so happens that Nimbus are looking for a junior assistant." Draco's eyes widened at the news. "And I may have put in a good word for you..."

"Seriously?!" Draco didn't know what else to say. The fact that he didn't already have a path set out for him had been niggling at the back of his mind. He'd been worried. Professor McGonagall gave a small smile.

"Yes, seriously, Draco. Now, naturally they knew who you were when I mentioned your name, they knew your background -" Draco rubbed his left arm subconsciously. "- but once I'd spoken to them, told them about you... Well, let's just say they're eager to meet you and would like you to go along for a chat in two days time."

"A chat, Professor?"

"Well, I suppose one could call it an interview. But I'd say it will probably be more informal. Once I'd finished singing your praises, they didn't seem as though they wanted you to slip through their fingers."

The only other time Draco had felt this grateful in his life was when Astoria had told him his dark mark means nothing. He had the biggest smile on his face.

"Thank you, Professor, I don't know how I can ever thank you."

"Good luck, Draco," she said, as she began to leave, heading in Potter's direction.

"Thank you," he said, turning back to rejoin Astoria's family.

"Oh, and Draco," McGonagall called. He turned back. "Do keep that smile. It's a nice change from that awful smirk you're usually wearing." She smiled as Draco laughed and scratched his ear, awkwardly. "Eleven o clock, Thursday. Ask for Duncan Herd." And with that, she was gone.

Draco went to tell Astoria what had just happened, which inevitably lead to more excited squeals and tight hugs. Already Draco was feeling nervous but he knew he could pull this off. He _had_ to.

The atmosphere down by the lake was pleasant as the afternoon faded into the evening. The ex-students were making the most of their last time at Hogwarts and they and their families and friends continued mingling on the grass banks until the time reached almost six o clock. Draco was relaxing, sharing a drink with Astoria and Daphne when someone tapped him on the shoulder. He turned to find himself face to face with Harry Potter. Astoria and Daphne exchanged worried glances.

"I hoped we could speak, as we probably won't see each other again after today."

Draco nodded in response, though he didn't speak. He was waiting for Potter to say whatever he had to say. He noticed Potter look pointedly at his girlfriend and her sister.

"Whatever you want to say can be said in front of them," Draco said, flatly.

"Right, okay," Potter said. "Well, really I just wanted to say... That day, that last day. You gave me your wand. Without it I - I couldn't have beaten Voldemort. And I just wanted to say thank you."

Harry looked Draco right in the eye. The last time he'd done so was when Draco refused to identify Harry in front of a room full of death eaters. He had, indeed, saved his neck on more than one occasion.

Draco did not really know what to say. He'd been a complete asshole to Potter and his friends for the best part of seven years and here Potter was thanking him. It didn't seem right. The silence stretched on for longer than was comfortable and Potter turned to leave, Granger, Weasley and the Weasley girl standing not too far behind him, watching, like some kind of support unit. Potter took a couple of steps away from Draco and then

"Potter," Draco called. Harry turned back to face the person he had despised for so many years of his life. Slowly, Draco extended an arm out to Potter, offering him his hand.

"Good luck," he said, simply. Potter was stunned but grasped the blond's hand in return, remaining silent. "And Potter..." Their eyes met again. "If there was one thing I'd want you to know about me, I'm not a bad guy. Not really." The two men let go of each others' hands.

"I know," Potter said certainly, and with each of them giving the other a courteous nod, their brief encounter was over.

"Wow," came Daphne's voice from over Draco's shoulder as she exhaled deeply. "I never thought I'd see the day."

Draco sniffed indignantly. "And you thought I did?" Daphne shrugged in response and began to examine her perfectly painted finger nails.

"We'd better be off soon," Draco told Astoria. "Do you want to come back to mine to stay after? All your things are there, anyway."

"Sounds perfect to me," Astoria replied, placing her small hands on Draco's cheeks and stroking them with her thumbs. She smiled up at him before planting a kiss on his lips. "So proud of you!" she told him for about the tenth time that day. The couple were so busy fussing over each other that they hadn't noticed someone lingering around them - the short, fat guy from Hogsmeade to be precise.

"Err, Mr Malfoy..." he said nervously.

Draco turned sharply and sneered slightly at the sight of the man, though he didn't say the things that were running through his mind. "What do you want?" he asked, moodily. There was absolutely no doubt that the old Draco was still in there.

"The prophet would like a photo, Mr Malfoy, of you and Hermione Granger." Some distance behind him, Granger was hovering, looking sheepish.

With a muttered "excuse me" to his girlfriend, Draco took the journalist to one side. "Weren't you the one harassing me and my girlfriend in Hogsmeade?" Draco hissed, though he already knew the answer. He wanted to watch the man squirm.

"Umm, yes, that would have been me," the short, fat man was sweating slightly under Draco's stare. This pleased Draco greatly.

"Then why on earth would you think that I would pose for a cosy post-results photograph for the benefit of you and your employers?" Draco kept his tone calm. In his imagination he had grabbed a fistful of the man's robes and was yelling in his face. His self restraint was being pushed to the limit.

"I, errr.. umm," the man stuttered. He had to shake himself, trying to remind himself that he was a strong and confident journalist who could not be bullied by a nineteen year old boy. "Circumstances have changed, Mr Malfoy. This is a momentous occasion and your success should be celebrated." He tried to sound as if he wasn't intimidated, but he hadn't done a very good job.

A slightly smug look appeared on Draco's face. He was totally in control of this situation. He considered what he could say next, before slowly opening his mouth to speak. "If I do this photo, for you, for your paper, for your boss, whatever... You will not hassle me or my girlfriend again." It wasn't a question, it was an order.

"Ab - absolutely, Mr Malfoy," the man agreed. He had no choice. It was well known that the Malfoy's could be very unpleasant people.

"In that case, I'll be in the photo. But if you once mention me being a death eater in this article..." He glanced over his shoulder, Astoria shooting him a nervous smile which he returned more confidently before turning back around and leaning close to the journalist's ear. "Then so help you," he finished his sentence in a menacing whisper. Draco was sure the man gave a slight quiver as he nodded his understanding. It was good to know he hadn't lost his touch. He could still scare people if need be.

"Right then, where do you want me?" Draco said loudly and cheerfully, clapping his hands together.

"Just - just over there with Miss Granger will do," the man said, taking out a handkerchief and wiping his brow with it, casting an anxious look at Draco.

"Are you alright with this?" Draco asked Granger, as he approached her.

She nodded in response. "I don't have any problems, if you don't." She looked at Draco, who shook his head. The man was fiddling with his camera as Draco and Hermione stood awkwardly, waiting.

"Alright, ready when you are," the man said, finally.

"About time," Draco said in a lazy drawl. He and Granger posed for the photo, stood with about a metres space in between the two of them, she smiling, he not.

The journalist withdrew from his camera, looking exasperated. "If you could both look a bit... Well, you know? Friendly?" Draco and Granger exchanged glances which showed they weren't best pleased about the situation. However, it was for two seconds and then their paths would never cross again. They moved closer together, Draco resting his hand on the small of Hermione's back. Over in the distance he spotted Weasley glaring over at them, like he had been doing when they were revision partners. God, Weasley has insecurity issues.

"Is your boyfriend likely to punch me in the face after this?" Draco muttered to Granger under his breath. She couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh, no, just ignore him..."

They both smiled, there was a big flash and the photo was done. Draco quickly drew back his arm. They were both thanked by the journalist who then left rather quickly.

"So..." Hermione said, feeling awkward as the two of them were left standing alone. "See you round then, I guess."

"Yeah," Draco said. What else was there to say. He supposed there were certain things he should be saying. It was time to swallow his pride. "Granger..." She gave him a questioning look. "I'm sorry for being such a wanker," he said, plainly. "And well done on your results and... And, good luck, I guess." He extended an arm out to her. She looked completely gob smacked as she lifted her arm and took his hand to shake it.

"Good luck, Draco," she said, with utmost sincerity in her voice. It was true, he had been a wanker to her for many of their school days, but she hadn't forgotten when he saved their necks, either. Once they'd parted ways, Draco was left wondering what the hell had gotten into him. He must have been going soft in his old age.


	22. Twenty One: When You're With Me

CHAPTER TWENTY ONE:_ When You're With Me _

It wasn't long before early dusk drew in, and slowly people began to leave Hogwarts for the last ever time. Draco felt odd, as he had done when he'd left the common room. He hadn't always thought highly of Hogwarts, but he held some very happy memories of the place which far outweighed the bad and, after all, if it wasn't for Hogwarts he wouldn't know Astoria. He figured he owed a lot to the place and indeed to McGonagall who had been very good to him throughout his last year.

Just before Draco was about to leave along with his mother and Astoria, Blaise came over.

"So, mate. This is it then I guess." Draco felt strangely emotional at these simple words. It was slowly sinking that all of their lives would be very different from now on. No bedding down with your mates after a heavy drinking session at four in the morning. No relaxing in the sunshine by the lake after a day's lessons. No Quidditch training on a Saturday morning.

Speaking of Quidditch, thanks to Draco's dedication to training the Slytherin team as best he could, even after his accident, Slytherin had won the house cup for the first time in eight years. Out of Draco's eight years at Hogwarts, that had been one of the best moments ever.

"Fuck. This is really real," Draco said to Blaise, dumbly. Blaise laughed at his words.

"Yeah, I'll really never have to put up with your snoring again!"

"I don't snore!" Draco said quickly. He turned to Astoria. "Do I snore?" he questioned her. He sounded totally affronted.

Blaise sent Astoria a cheeky wink, goading her to go along with the tease but she thought she'd already teased Draco enough that day.

"No, Draco, you don't snore. Well... You do, but only after you've had a bit too much to drink." She found the relieved look on her boyfriend's face hilarious.

"Right, anyway," Draco said, turning back to Blaise. "Keep in contact and all that shit won't you?"

"Of course, man!" Blaise held out a hand, which Draco took firmly and they embraced each other in a manly hug.

"Thanks for everything, man. I wouldn't be here without you," Draco said quietly. He didn't want to sound soppy, but he meant it. Blaise had helped him through some tough times, he had no idea.

Blaise, yet again, dismissed Draco's thanks. "You'd have done the same, mate," he said certainly. They stopped hugging.

Daphne came over and gave the two men a funny look. "Guys, have you even considered how much we're going to see each other outside of our cosy school lives? You two are best friends. Blaise is my boyfriend. I'm Astoria's sister and Astoria is Draco's girlfriend. We're practically family." Draco laughed. She had a point. "Anyway, you two have a lovely evening," she went on, kissing Draco on both cheeks. "And I'll see _you _soon, okay?"

"Definitely," Draco agreed. "And you two have a nice meal tonight." Blaise and Daphne were going for a supposedly romantic meal - something which they'd never done before.

With that, the two sisters hugged each other goodbye and Draco headed back to the manor, accompanied by the two women in his life. He could only hope that the evening would go well.

A couple of hours later Narcissa had produced a fine meal of filet steak, served with home made chips, a trio of green vegetables and mushrooms cooked in a garlic and red wine sauce. Draco had received his talent for cooking from his mother though she used magic and, surprisingly, he did not.

Conversation around the table was flowing easily, particularly after the help of a bottle of white wine shared between the three of them. Narcissa had already shared stories with Astoria about when Draco was little, even producing a photograph which showed Draco aged three running about the manor with no clothes on, much to Draco's embarrassment. Wasn't this the kind of thing parents did after five years, not five months? Astoria, of course, had laughed her head off, as had Narcissa. Old Draco would have been more than annoyed, but now Draco was happy to see his mother and girlfriend getting on and, more importantly, was happy to see his mother happy.

Much time passed, and Draco decided to take Astoria for a stroll around the gardens. The sky had just turned dark, but the garden was well lit. As well as wanting to show her around, he'd fancied a cigarette, his first in a few days because he no longer smoked as much as he'd used to. Stress levels were much lower now, after all.

"Wow, this is beautiful," said Astoria in an awed voice, looking around at the lawns, the flowers, the fountain and the tiny pathways which lead to further gardens. Draco took Astoria by the hand and lead her right to the bottom of the garden, over a small wooden bridge, to a swinging chair which looked upon the whole gardens, the lights from the manor twinkling in the not-too-far distance.

They sat down as a cool summer breeze whipped through their hair. "So, what do you think?" Draco asked Astoria.

"Well, I knew you were rich but I didn't really expect anything like this."

Draco chuckled. "Haven't even shown you around the house yet," he pointed out.

"Later..." Astoria said softly, cuddling up to Draco as he put an arm around her. He began to slowly rock them back and forth on the chair, more out of habit than anything. He found it impossible to sit on that chair and not swing. "Hey, where's you?" she asked him, suddenly.

He pulled a confused face, but when he looked at her, he noticed she was looking up to the sky and immediately knew what she was on about. He smiled to himself.

"I thought you liked astronomy?" he teased her, adding "It's north somewhere, I think."

Astoria didn't respond, she just stayed looking up at the sky. It was so peaceful there, with only the distant sound of birds and bugs. Draco leant in, resting his head on her shoulder, staring up at the house. Astoria took his hand, not looking away from the stars.

"I loved McGonagall's speech for you today," she said suddenly, out of nowhere.

Draco said nothing, he just blinked several times and took a tighter grip of her hand.

"It - everything she said, it just... I really think she did you justice," Astoria went on, thoughtfully. "It made me really emotional."

"Why?"

"Because of everything you've been through, Draco. And people still don't _get _you, they won't ever get you."

"You get me," was all Draco said in response. His words sounded childlike but he didn't care. He didn't have to care around Astoria, he was himself. He joined her in looking up at the stars.

Astoria smiled at Draco's words. She loved him so much, but more importantly he let her love him, which she felt was somewhat of a great achievement considering the way he used to be.

"Thank you for letting me."

Again, Draco didn't know what to respond so he remained quiet.

"Draco..." she went on, slowly. After he gave an 'mmm' she continued. "That night we had the talk in the common room, you know, before we kissed?"

"Yeah..." Draco said, now apprehensive that she was going to want to talk about it again. He barely given it a thought since he'd told her everything and he wanted it to stay that way. It was done, it was over and it was time to forget it as best he could.

"Well, it's just that I think about it all the time. I mean, we kind of left it hanging, wasn't there anything else you wanted to say?"

"No," Draco said quickly.

"There's nothing else you want to get off your chest? Because I can listen, Draco."

"I know you can, Ria, but I don't have anything more to say about it. " He just wished she'd drop it and take a no as a no.

"But Draco, you must have so much more to say. I remember how you felt after we talked, you felt so much better."

Draco sighed, exasperated. "Yes, but we talked. We talked, and it's done and it ends here, it ends now. I don't want to think about it."

Astoria wasn't thrown by the abruptness of his words. She knew he'd never be aggressive towards her so she kept trying.

"Draco, he tortured you," she said, as though he needed reminding.

"I know what he did, Astoria!" Draco finally snapped, his patience was lost. It was true that he'd shared that with Astoria and only Astoria but he didn't greatly appreciate her repeating it, whether they were alone or not. It was still painful to think of and it wasn't very nice to hear. He stood up from the chair, now completely agitated.

"Draco, sit down," Astoria said in a quiet voice. She didn't want to annoy him but it looked like it was too late. And he certainly wasn't going to sit back down.

"Don't you realise how hard that was for me to talk about? How hard it is for me to even think about?" His tone was slightly accusatory, and she didn't like it. She'd never been anything less than supportive. She decided to remain silent, not wanting to provoke him. She would just let him say his piece. "Do you want to know why he torture me?"

He was stood looking down on her. She looked up at his question, her eyes boring right into his. She raised her eyebrows, encouraging him to go on talking.

"It was because I wouldn't torture someone. He wanted me to torture someone. A girl. About your age. He told me that if people don't do the torturing, they become the tortured. And do you know something? I'm glad I took it. I'm _glad_. But that does not mean, Astoria, that I want to talk about it. That does not mean that I want to think about it. And that does not mean that I want you to bring it up!" His voice had become louder and louder has he'd spoken. Some disgruntled birds flew out of a nearby tree at the sound of his raised voice. But he wasn't finished yet. "Why is it that you want me to talk about it so badly? You're my girlfriend but sometimes I feel more like you're trying to be my therapist. I don't need a therapist, Astoria, I'm not insane, look at me! Look at me!"

She was really worried now. He'd just said that he wasn't insane but that was exactly how he was acting at this moment in time. She forced herself to look up at the angry Draco she'd created. Five months in and here they were having their first argument. Well, she wasn't arguing, but he was unmistakably spoiling for her to retaliate.

"What do you want me to do, Ria? Should I cry on your shoulder again? Should I let you hold me while I sob in your arms? What was it like to watch me cry, Ria, I'd love to know!"

He stopped talking, his breathing was extremely heavy. She continued to stare up at him, tears prickling in her eyes, but she would not cry. She would not let him make her cry. Draco suddenly let out a frustrated cry, turned on his heel and walked away.

Astoria was left alone, the only sound audible was her tiny sniffles as she tried not to cry, and the slight squeaking of the chains as she rocked herself backwards and forwards. She could have gone after him, but she knew it wasn't a good idea. Everyone had always said how Draco had a bad temper, and although she'd never seen evidence, she'd certainly heard about it. A temper didn't bother her, as she sometimes had one too, but she certainly didn't like it when it was her he'd lost it with. She felt extremely vulnerable and very upset, left alone in the manor garden at nighttime. She loved Draco, there was no doubt about that, but they had only been together five months, it wasn't like they knew everything about each other. Aspects of their relationship were and would be unpredictable for some years to come. It was because of this, that Astoria had no idea how long it would be before Draco came to find her, but she knew one thing for certain. She would wait for as long as it took.

She brought her feet off of the ground and tucked her knees up under her chin, wrapping her arms around her legs. She felt small. She was already hoping that this would never happen again. Her and Draco were usually so wrapped up in each other, so in love, the perfect couple they'd even been called. Right now it really didn't feel that way, but relationships can't always be a bed of roses.

Not too far away, Draco was pacing around a secluded spot of grass. He hadn't known whether or not Astoria would come after him as they'd never argued before but he was hoping she wouldn't. The more he paced, the more Draco realised how horrible he'd been. Astoria had been absolutely amazing to him. That night back in January she'd listened intently to every word he'd said, she hadn't judged him, she'd let him cry, she'd comforted him and she hadn't told a soal. Now he'd pretty much just thrown that all back in her face. Admittedly, she had pushed him to get angry - he had made it clear he hadn't wanted to talk and she hadn't taken no for an answer. But, then again, he'd told her more things about his torture in the heat of the moment. Maybe he was kidding himself. Maybe he _did _still want to talk about it. Maybe Astoria knew him better than he knew himself.

He'd been pacing for a good fifteen minutes, even stopping to kick a tree stump, before his agitation and anger subsided. He was much more angry with himself than he was with his girlfriend. He went back to find her.

When he reached the bottom of the tiny wooden bridge, he spotted her straight away, curled up piteously on the swinging chair. She looked scared and so, so upset and that was because of him. It was then that he made a pact with himself that he would never shout at her like that again. He would much rather walk away having said nothing, and make himself calm down.

"Astoria," he said softly from the bridge but she didn't look up. She continued staring at the ground in front of her, chin still resting on her knees. "Astoria," he said again. She gave a small sniff and he hoped against hope that she wasn't crying. He'd hate himself if he'd made her cry. His beautiful, amazing, caring girlfriend.

He walked over to her and knelt down so that he was obstructing the direction in which she was staring. She remained, unblinking, staring back at him but not really seeing him.

"Astoria, I'm so sorry," he said in a quiet, yet almost husky voice. "I - I didn't mean to shout at you." Still she said nothing. He couldn't blame her. "It's just that, I hadn't thought about it in so long. I've been so happy since we've been together that it hadn't even crossed my mind. And we had such a great day today, and then this just kind of brought it all back." Still nothing. He reached out and touched her leg gently. She didn't move away, so that was a good sign. "Those things I said, I didn't mean them. Really. I don't think you're trying to be my therapist. I know that you're just being the loving, caring girlfriend that you are."

"Do you know that though?" she whispered. Draco's words had hurt her. All she'd ever wanted to do was help.

"Yes," Draco insisted. "I know that, and that's one of the things I love about you. And that stuff about you wanting me to cry... Shit, Ria, I'm so sorry I didn't mean any of it. I know it can't have been easy for you seeing me like that, back along."

"It wasn't Draco. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do, listen to you telling me all that stuff you told me in January and not being able to cry because I had to be strong for you."

Draco put his face in his hands. He really was a thoughtless prick sometimes. He swallowed hard and looked back up.

"Ri, I was kidding myself when I said there was nothing more to stay. Can you come with me?" He held out his hand to her, hoping she would give him another chance.

She considered his hand for a good few moments before placing her small hand within his and allowing him to pull her to her feet. They made their way, in silence, back to the manor where Draco took her to a dark room with an extremely long, elegant wooden table. The drawing room. He didn't say anything, he just allowed her to gaze around the place, his own eyes darting around.

She only had to take one look at Draco's face to know what he was trying to tell her. He looked withdrawn, scared almost, as his eyes scanned the room.

"This is where it happened," she said in a whisper. When Draco nodded in response, her heart sunk. It was as though she felt his pain.

"It's - Draco I don't want to be in here and I don't think you do either."

Tears were beginning to shine in both of their eyes as Draco shook his head this time instead of nodding. Again, he took her by the hand and lead her to his old bedroom, where they both clambered onto his huge bed and lead side by side, hand in hand, staring up at the ceiling.

"It happened more than once," Draco told her, suddenly. "I think it was seven, maybe eight times. I started to lose count." His voice was shaking, but he was most certainly not going to break down like the last time they talked about it. He sniffed. "I was always the subject of ridicule. Hardly surprising... The others were always making comments... He's got no stomach just like his father... They all thought they were better than me but the truth was, I was better than them. I wasn't hurting people, I wasn't killing people. They were animals. I felt ill just looking at them."

Astoria didn't speak, she just let Draco talk, as she'd done before. She kept a tight grip on his hand though, blinking up at the ceiling.

"The fact that he was doing that to me in my own house... Mother and father had no idea, it made me feel sick. I had to keep it to myself. It would have killed them to know, mother especially. She would have blamed herself, I know she would have."

Draco stopped talking and closed his eyes for a second. He didn't want to cry but it was so hard not to. He breathed deeply.

"He used the cruciatus curse on me. Mainly. I'd know when it was coming. I'd try to block the pain in my mind. I can block things in my mind, you see, I'm good at it. But this is so different. It's pain like I can't even describe and I've been physically attacked, I've been sliced to pieces, I've nearly been burnt alive, I've fallen from a broom and broken half my bones... Nothing compares to the pain you feel when..." He trailed off.

Astoria was having to bite down on her own lip to stop herself from crying. It was killing her to hear these things, and she knew it was killing Draco to say them but she knew it would help in the end, as it had done before.

"He'd laugh, you know, as he was doing it. My whole body would feel like it was on fire. I'd be lead on the floor having a fit, and his laughter would be ringing in my ears. Sometimes... sometimes I can still hear it, in my dreams. In my nightmares. I wake up covered in sweat, and for a split second I don't remember that he's dead and I feel like I'm sixteen all over again..."

He shifted his head to look at Astoria who saw him move from the corner of her eye. She rolled from her back onto her side so she was facing him. He mimicked her, and the two of them looked into each others' eyes. There was sadness in both.

"I could cry right now," Astoria said in a hoarse whisper.

"Me, too," said Draco, and his lip trembled ever so slightly. He noticed a tear escape from the corner of Astoria's eye and roll down her cheek. He raised his hand and softly brushed it away before moving in closer and pressing his forehead against hers. His eyes fell closed as several tears cascaded down his face. Astoria brought an arm up and placed it lovingly over Draco's neck, her fingers lightly playing with his white blond hair.

The pair of them just lead on the bed for a while, crying silently. Draco struggled to comprehend what was happening. This girl lead next to him loved him so much that she was crying over something that happened to him. Something that hadn't had any affect on her, only him. That was the strongest kind of love he could imagine. He didn't know what he'd done to deserve it but he hoped he'd never lose it.

After what seemed like many hours but was probably only ten minutes their tears dried up and Astoria gave Draco a sad smile. She thought he was done but he had one more thing to say.

"The thing is..." he said, in a slightly confused whisper. "I don't ever have those dreams when you're with me..."


	23. Twenty Two: Round Two

CHAPTER TWENTY TWO: _Round Two_

That night Astoria and Draco had apparated back to Draco's London home where they had snuggled up in his bed and fallen to sleep. The next day it was as if nothing had happened, as if Draco had never got angry. One thing Astoria did was make a mental note not to bring up the matter of Draco's torture again, knowing that, if he should want to, he would talk to her of his own accord.

A couple of days later Draco found himself staring up at the Nimbus headquarters at a secret location in central London, visible only to witches and wizards. He was dressed in a suit, which felt unusual now; once upon a time he'd worn a suit every day as standard, but not anymore. He felt overly formal considering McGonagall had told him it wouldn't really be an interview, but he hadn't known what else to wear.

He entered the building and walked confidently up to the front reception desk, clearing his throat so that the blonde, female receptionist would realise he was there. She glanced up from her paper work upon hearing him and gave an inquisitive raise of her eyebrow, looking Draco up and down.

"And what can I do for you, handsome?" she said with a slight pout.

Draco took an instant disliking to the girl. She already seemed too much like Pansy for his liking.

"I'm here to see Duncan Herd," he told her.

"Name?" she enquired, running an elegant finger down a long piece of parchment which Draco assumed must be the appointment sheet.

"Malfoy. Draco Malfoy."

The girl looked back up at him abruptly and Draco noticed her eyes linger on his left arm for a second. He rolled his eyes, already bored of being judged, though he said nothing. She didn't either. But she didn't have to. Draco understood perfectly well.

"Ah," she said as she found him on the list. "You're a little early. Take the stairs behind me, go to floor three, follow the corridor around and it's the forth door on the left after the second right." She spoke rather fast. She must direct people to that room about twenty times per day.

"Good job I've got a good memory," Draco said, and with that he left, and he had a funny feeling that she watched him go.

There were to two hard, wooden chairs strategically placed outside Herd's office, acting as a makeshift waiting room. They weren't, however, strategic enough to entice Draco to sit on them. Instead, he chose to lean against the wall opposite the door. He could hear voices coming from inside and couldn't help but wonder whether it was someone else going for the junior assistant's role. McGonagall's words had been comforting, but she was probably just being nice. He sensed that she pitied him though pity was something that he neither expected nor wanted.

It wasn't long before the door to the office opened and a man who looked several years older than Draco left, looking fairly unhappy. A muscular man with a mustache came to the door after the man who left and called in an emotionless voice "Draco Malfoy." Draco noticed how the man, who must be Duncan Herd, did not look directly at him.

Draco stepped forwards, away from the wall. "That's me."

"Come in, Mr Malfoy." The man stepped aside, holding the door open for Draco who walked into the small office which had a nice view of the square below, and a few too many pot plants. Draco was instantly reminded of the greenhouses back at Hogwarts. "Please, take a seat."

Herd seated himself opposite Draco after quietly closing the door.

"So..." Herd's eyes finally met Draco's. "It is to my understanding that you were recommended to us by Minerva McGonagall for the junior assistant's role?"

"That's right," Draco said, his voice steady. He was determined not to mess this up. Once he had a foot through the door he knew he could make his way to the top if he put the work in.

"She said great things of you, Mr Malfoy." He quickly scan read a piece of parchment which lay in front of him. "Excels in charms, transfiguration and potions... Highly advanced for his age... An excellent wizard who has shown his potential from day one..." He looked at Draco for a second before asking "Can you tell me, Mr Malfoy, what sets _you _aside from every other Hogwarts graduate we have seen over the last week?"

"As Professor McGonagall told you, I am more than capable. I can detect hidden charms in minutes, I can strip brooms with my eyes closed. I've ridden from a very young age, I know what a person wants from a broom. In fact, I could probably cover every aspect of your business... Maintenance, design, advertising, manufacture, testing..."

Herd was looking at Draco with an interested look on his face. Every so often he would smooth down his mustache. Draco's confidence intrigued him. He was nothing like the other graduate they'd seen; bumbling, nervous and not entirely sure what to say.

Draco hadn't gone in to the office knowing what he was going to say, but he was on a roll now and nothing was going to stop him.

"I have just completed my year's role as quidditch coach for the Slytherin team. I was the first and only person to ever have been given a coaching role with the house team. With my help, Slytherin took the cup for the first time in eight years."

"This job will not involve any quidditch playing, Mr Malfoy." He was attempting to throw the man of track, to see how he would react. Draco wasn't bothered in the slightest.

"Well, no, but I think the fact that I was a coach shows that I know how to handle a broom, and that I understand how they work and how people want them to work."

Herd nodded thoughtfully, impressed by Draco's ability to respond well and quickly.

"As well as that, I can speak more than one language which I think is a bonus to any business. I could be used to converse with people in other countries if need be."

Again, Herd was impressed. "What foreign languages do you speak?"

"Greek, and a bit of French."

There was silence for a minute or so. Herd was scribbling notes furiously. Draco supposed he would have people to consult with before he made a final decision.

"Mr Malfoy," Herd said, slowly, after the long silence. "I do apologise for having to ask but... Your past... I cannot pretend that I don't know perfectly well who you are..."

Draco nodded understandingly. "Whatever you want to ask I will answer. I can't do any more than that."

Duncan was surprised by Draco's willingness to answer questions about his past. He hadn't been expecting it. However, it was a pleasant surprise because he already knew that he very much wanted Draco for the job.

"Tell me anything you feel is relevant, Mr Malfoy."

"To be honest, I don't see any of it is relevant," Draco admitted. "I was a child who got forced into a bad situation and tried his best to get out of it. Admittedly, yes, I did hurt a couple of people along the way. But what you should understand is that I was scared for my own life. I often disobeyed Voldemort and, indeed, I suffered the consequences. I was offered the chance to return to Hogwarts. I took it. I wanted to change my life and I wanted to change peoples' opinions of me and, as far as people have let me, I've done exactly that. I'm a determined man, Mr Herd. If I want something I will do whatever I can to get it and I would do the same for this job. I made mistakes. So has every other person in this world. The fact that I made mistakes should not affect my chances in this position."

He was done. He waited with baited breath, wondering whether he'd done himself justice. If he didn't get the job now, at least he knew he'd said everything he could have. He was satisfied with himself.

"Indeed it shouldn't," Duncan said. He gave Draco a hard stare for a few moments before saying without a doubt in his mind "Which is why I want to offer you the position of junior assistant."

Draco relaxed immediately. He'd done it!

"We'll start you off with smaller jobs, see how you do, but I'm pretty confident that we'll have moved you up to senior assistant within a couple of months, and then we'll see how it goes from there."

"That's brilliant. Thank you so much." Draco was beaming. He couldn't wait to get back to the house where Astoria was waiting for him. The two men stood up and shook hands.

"Welcome to the team, Mr Malfoy. You start two weeks today."

After a short chat with Herd, Draco made his way back down to reception, which he strode through at quite some pace. Just before he reached the revolving doors he heard the receptionist call out to him.

"I finish at six if you fancy a dri-"

"No, thanks!" he called back, holding up a hand as a goodbye without even looking back.

When Draco got outside of the building, he lit up a cigarette and puffed on it hastily. He crossed the street and paced around the square, inhaling and exhaling until his cigarette was finished.

He had found the 'interview' untaxing. It hadn't been difficult or challenging. All he had to do was be honest and it had worked. The job was his. And best of all, he had two weeks to spend with his girlfriend before he started life as a working man. The thought of Astoria jolted him out of his thoughts and he apparated back to his house at once.

"Draco? Is that you?" he heard Astoria call from the lounge. It was time to play a trick on her. He made his way through and as soon as she clapped eyes on him he displayed a disappointed expression, shaking his head slowly. He sat down on the sofa, putting his head in his hands.

"Oh, Draco, no?" Astoria said. She sounded so disappointed.

"I did everything I could," Draco mumbled in a disheartened tone. Astoria sat down next to him, watching him apprehensively.

"Oh, Draco..."

"Which is why I got the job." Draco looked round at his girlfriend who wouldn't take her eyes off of him. A look of confusion suddenly appeared on her face.

"What?!"

"I got the job, Ria! I got it!" Draco said, grinning from ear to ear as his words slowly dawned on Astoria.

"Ahh, you got it! Oh my god, oh my god!" Astoria was screaming borderline hysterically, and flapping her arms around like a lunatic. Draco laughed at her and then she started laughing as well.

Draco stood and picked her up off of the sofa as she continued to squeal excitedly. She wrapped her legs and arms around him and gave him the tightest hug possible, repeated kissing him on the cheek. Draco held her until she'd finally calmed down, and then they looked at each other. Within seconds they were locked in a heated kiss, Draco's hands cupping Astoria's bum to keep her where she was. Her fingers were suddenly entwined in his hair, his tongue searching her mouth. Draco walked with her, however he did not turn right for the stairs. He turned left and into the kitchen, placing Astoria on the kitchen table. Astoria's mind was racing, she was excited. Looking down, she could already see Draco's hardness protruding above the waistline of his boxers. She moaned quietly at the sight of him. She couldn't ever imagine getting bored of him, as she had done so easily with her previous boyfriends.

Draco leant over Astoria, kissing her neck hungrily. She smelled so good, he couldn't get enough. He didn't hasten to slip a hand up her skirt and touch the wet fabric of her knickers, making her moan even more.

"Don't you think you'd better take off that suit?" she asked in a devilish whisper.

"If you insist," Draco replied, taking off his jacket and shirt in no time, and dropping his trousers to the floor. He'd stayed in good shape since he'd made that promise to himself. His six pack was clearly visible, though not too pronounced, and his upper arms were fairly muscular. Whenever he held Astoria in bed she always told him that she felt safe and that was something that he loved to hear.

It wasn't long before Draco climbed on top of Astoria, who was now only dressed in a silky dark pink bra. Draco took his cock in his hand and ran it along the length of Astoria. She quivered at his tease, as he watched her with a hungry expression on his face.

"Draco," she moaned softly. "Draco don't. Don't tease me." Her eyes were clamped shut in frustration. Then suddenly she realised something and her eyes snapped open. "Draco, the window! People can see in!" She sounded a bit panic stricken.

Draco smirked, placed his mouth next to her ear and whispered "Who cares? Maybe I want them to see." Strangely, it was the most erotic thing Astoria had ever heard in her life. She didn't have time to reply because Draco slipped his full length inside her and slowly began thrusting in and out. He was making a noise, a very deep noise, which she'd never heard him make before. His skilled hips continued the work and Astoria's hands explored his chest and stomach, and she lightly pulled on the light blond hair which trailed beneath his belly button.

"Oh, Ria. Ria. Yeah, fuck, yes." Draco was moaning much louder than he normally did. Astoria had a funny feeling that the idea of them being caught made it feel better for him. She couldn't complain though, she loved hearing him moan. Admittedly, she'd heard him making those kind of noises before they'd even been together. In her dreams. She'd have dreams about them having sex. But she would never tell him that. It was far too embarrassing.

She was jerked from her thoughts when she felt Draco's finger touch her where she was most sensitive. The combination of this and her filling her up was the most satisfying thing she'd ever felt. His thrusts were becoming more energetic; the kitchen table began to shake slightly. She whimpered at his touch as he began tracing his finger in circles around her.

"Yeah, you like that?" he panted, picking up his pace. He'd always been good with his hands.

"Yes! Oh, Draco, yes! Don't stop, please don't stop!"

"Baby, who said I was stopping. I'm going to keep going until I make you come." His voice was rough and he was panting heavily. Every now and again he was glancing towards the window.

After a short amount of time Astoria began to feel herself building up. Draco was far too good, he never took long at all to bring her to climax. She supposed it must be because he'd had a lot of practice.

Draco could feel himself getting closer to the edge, too. Astoria was clawing at his naked torso and she struggled to draw her pleasure out for as long as possible. The sensation was sending Draco wild and he couldn't take it anymore.

"Astoria, I'm going to -"

"Me too!" she moaned.

Astoria reached a hand down and took a firm hold on Draco's balls, massaging them slightly just as she started contracting violently around Draco's cock. He spilled everything he had inside of her. His rhythm was lost, but he continued thrusting frantically, never stopping his fingers from working her where she loved it so much. He let out a throaty groan, panting, trying to catch his breath. Once he had steadied himself, he spoke.

"I swear... Every time we do this, it gets even better than the last."

Astoria giggled. "Only because you're so amazing."

"It's not just me, though, is it? It's you... Look at you." He stared adoringly at her almost-naked body which remained lead across his kitchen table. He could hardly believe it when he felt himself starting to get hard again. "I don't know about you but I could go again," he told her cheekily. Her heart began to race again. Draco could tell by the look on her face that she agreed.

He offered her a hand and she jumped down off of the table. "Let's get you to bed," he growled in her ear. Just his words made her knees tremble, and he began pulling her towards the stairs. She followed him up in anticipation and at that moment in time she only knew one thing. She could never live without this man in her life again.


	24. Twenty Three: Drastic Changes

CHAPTER TWENTY THREE: _Drastic Changes_

One year later, Draco found himself relaxing in his living room, on only his third week off since he'd started his job. He had been working extremely hard at Nimbus, after being promoted to senior assistant after just a month. He was now working his way towards a head of department role, and if he achieved it, he would be the youngest in Nimbus' history as he was still only twenty.

He was loving his job. It was very diverse, he got involved in a lot of aspects such as broom testing and quality control, which were his main roles. Once he achieved a higher position it was like that he would become much more involved with the design side of things and he couldn't wait.

Draco could hear the sound of Astoria singing in the shower upstairs. She had left Hogwarts, now. In fact, she was currently beautifying herself for her graduation which was set to begin in a couple of hours. Draco had seen very little of her over the last few months as they had both been working their knuckles to the grindstone. It made their time together so much more rewarding, though.

No matter what grades Astoria achieved, she had her hopes set on opening her own store. She still desperately wanted to be a designer. Draco wasn't sure exactly what, but he knew it was something to do with dress robes, etc. One thing he was sure of, was that he was going to help in any way he could to help his girlfriend achieve her dream. He had his, she deserved hers.

Astoria had absolutely no idea that Draco had in fact purchased a small, unoccupied building on Diagon Alley just over a month ago. Admittedly, it was a little run down. However, nothing a touch of magic couldn't sort out and hopefully, one day in the near future, it would become whatever Astoria needed it to be.

He smiled to himself as she continued singing. The pair of them had been extremely happy, pretty much from the first day. Since that night at Malfoy manor, Draco hadn't lost his temper with Astoria again and they rarely argued. When they did it was only over stupid things like what to have for dinner. They'd been together just over a year and a half now and, in Draco's eyes, things between them were starting to get serious. He really imagined his future with Astoria.

He heard her leave the bathroom and head into his bedroom. Half of the wardrobe was now filled with her things. He heard her rattling through the clothes hangers in attempt to recover her graduation outfit. Draco loved opening the wardrobe and seeing both of their things hanging together. He wanted it more. Which was why, once Astoria was settled with everything after leaving school, he was going to ask her to move in with him. It was a really big deal for him but he wanted it more than anything. He was just hoping he'd get the response he wanted.

Draco was already ready to leave. He wore black trousers and a light blue shirt, unbuttoned rather than wearing it formally with a tie. He was sat in the armchair, casually flicking through a magazine when Astoria entered the room. Draco looked up from his magazine and his draw dropped instantly.

Astoria was dressed in a black dress, tight fitting at the top, but much looser at the bottom, resting just above her knee. She wore black shoes with a tiny heel, and she had straightened the under layer of her hair with her curls remaining on top, her fringe pushed to one side. Around her wrist was the snake bracelet Draco had given her a year ago and she also wore a silver necklace which he had given her for Christmas. She looked absolutely beautiful.

"Wow," was all Draco managed to say as he stared at her.

"So, what do you think?" she asked, giggling and giving him a twirl.

"Ri, you look absolutely amazing," Draco told her. And she was all his.

"Oh, don't make me blush," she joked as Draco got up from the chair and walked over to her.

"Put it this way, there isn't going to be a guy there today that's not jealous of me," he said, smugly.

"Draco!" Astoria squealed.

He pulled her towards him and gave her a light kiss on the lips.

"Don't worry I won't smother you with my kisses. I know you got all that make up on and stuff and my life wouldn't be worth living if I ruined it, and blah de blah."

"Oh, you cheeky!" Astoria said as Draco grinned.

"How are you feeling? Nervous?" Draco asked, suddenly becoming serious.

"A little," Astoria said, fiddling with her earring. "But what's done is done. I'm _sure _I messed up ancient runes but what the hell! We can't all get perfect results like my boyfriend, can we?"

"Hey, don't say that. You could easily get what I got!" Draco defended her. "But, either way, you have your ambitions and you have what you need to achieve them, so even if something did go horribly wrong it wouldn't matter." Astoria smiled. He always knew how to make her feel better. "And hey, if you have messed up... I'll only ignore you for a week or so. I shouldn't imagine it would be much longer."

"Oi!" she yelled, punching him on the arm as he laughed his head off at his own joke.

"You know I'm joking, baby," he said, kissing her on the forehead. "I'd love you even if you were thicker than a troll." He winked at her as she whined about him being mean. "Anyway, come on, we'd better be going," Draco said, checking his watch.

He did his usual check of the house to make sure all the windows were closed, and putting an arm around Astoria's shoulders, the pair of them left for Hogwarts.

Not too much later, Draco had seated himself with Astoria's family near the lakeside. It seemed crazy to think that it was over a year ago since he was in Astoria's position. He had kissed her and wished her the best of luck before she made her way to sit with the students from her year at the front. Draco sat chatting with her family until it was time for the ceremony to begin - he was on very good terms with her family, now, having spent a lot of time at theirs. He'd even cooked a meal for them one night, which had gone down very well.

As the ceremony commenced, Draco listened carefully for his girlfriend's name to be called. There were no speeches like their had been for his graduation, but as there were a lot more students, just calling each person up to the front to collect their certificates was very time consuming. After just under half an hour, Astoria's name was called by McGonagall.

"Miss Astoria Greengrass. You achieved to Os, two Es and an A. Congratulations."

Draco stood to clap his girlfriend, and whistled her as she made her way to the front. From the look on her face, he was unable to tell whether she was happy with these results or not but he was certainly proud of her. She flashed him a smile as she made her way back to her seat so he supposed she was happy, which came as a relief. He didn't want to hear her putting herself down as she sometimes did.

Just after her sister had collected her certificate, Daphne muttered something to Draco about having to leave for a moment. She eased her way down the row and walked away from everyone who had gathered from the ceremony. Draco noticed that she didn't look her usual glowing self. He peered around and watched her lean against a tree for a moment.

"Blaise, is she okay?" he asked Blaise in a worried voice, leaning over Daphne's unoccupied chair.

Blaise nodded, still looking ahead. "Yeah, yeah she's fine. She just keeps being sick. It's just a bug, innit."

"Oh," Draco said. "Should one of us go and check on her?" He craned his neck to catch sight of her again.

"Nah, she'll be fine," Blaise said. He didn't seem to bothered and so Draco let it drop. A few minutes later Daphne was pushing her way back down the row and seated herself between Draco and Blaise.

"Are you okay?" Draco whispered.

"Yes, I'm fine. I just felt sick. I've just been a bit ill. Don't fuss, Draco."

Draco merely shrugged. If Daphne didn't want his concern then so be it. He decided to let it drop, though she really didn't look well.

At the end of the ceremony, Draco found Astoria chatting with some friends. He decided to sneak up behind her and surprise her. Cheekily, he pinched her bum. She squealed loudly, looking around at her dastardly boyfriend, who was smiling widely at her.

"Congratulations babe! I told you you'd be fine, didn't I?!" He gave her a light kiss on the lips. "Which grades did you get for which subjects?"

"Well, obviously the A was for ancient runes... Os for charms and potions, Es for defence and transfiguration."

"That's brilliant. I'm so proud of you." Draco kissed her again. She couldn't help but smile against his lips.

"Anyway, what's the plan now, do you have any ideas?" Astoria asked her boyfriend. She didn't much fancy hanging around for hours.

"Ah, well, according to your mum we're all going for a celebratory meal," Draco informed her. "I don't think Daphne's going to be much up for it though."

Astoria gave him a quizzical look.

"She's ill," Draco told her. "According to Blaise she keeps being sick."

"_That's _why she was so long in the bathroom the other morning!" Astoria announced, putting two and two together. Draco raised an eyebrow at her.

"And you're one to talk?"

"Anyway..." Astoria said, suggesting that the topic of conversation should change. Draco laughed at her, then he remembered his own plan.

"Oh, by the way, before we all go out for the meal, I have to take you somewhere. I've got something to show you."

"Ooh, what?"

"You'll just have to find out when we get there, won't you?"

"Why are you so secretive, Draco Malfoy?" Astoria put on her best whiney voice, but she knew it wouldn't make him give in. He was far too stubborn.

"If you can't wait to know that badly then, come on. I'll take you there now," Draco offered.

"Ooh, okay then!" Astoria said goodbye to her friends, and they made the usual promises to stay in touch as she hugged and kisses every one of them. Her and Draco then left hand in hand, told her family they'd see them back at the house, and once they were safely out of school grounds they apparated to the Leaky Cauldron. Astoria now felt event more confused than before.

"What are we doing here?" she asked as Draco took her hand and lead her through the pub to the brick wall which concealed Diagon Alley.

"What do you think we're doing here? Seriously?" he asked her.

"Well, I would say you're taking me for some fancy meal down Diagon Alley, but you just said we had a family thing on, so... No idea!"

Draco laughed. "You are probably the most impatient person I know. And your guess is completely wrong so just wait two minutes," he said, as he lead her by the hand up the Alley. When they drew level with the property he'd bought for Astoria he stopped them dead in their tracks and turned to face it. It still looked a little run down, as it had before, but Draco didn't doubt for a second that Astoria would have it looking lovely in no time.

"Why have we stopped here?" Astoria asked, looking from the empty shop, up to Draco and back again.

Draco said nothing, he merely nodded his head towards the shop, which was near the Gringott's end of the street.

"Draco! What?" Astoria asked again in frustration. She really didn't understand what he was getting at.

Draco dipped a hand into his trouser pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He held them up so that the sunlight glinted off of them. Astoria stared at him as it slowly dawned on her what he was trying to say with no words. Then he spoke.

"You wanted a place. Somewhere to design... work... sell... So that's what I got you," Draco told her, as though it was the simplest thing on earth.

"What the - Draco, you bought this place? For me?"

"No, sweetheart, I bought it for Bathilda Bagshot," Draco said sarcastically.

"Draco, seriously? You bought this for - for me?" she couldn't take her eyes off of her boyfriend's smirking face.

"_Yes_, Astoria. I bought this place _for you_." He smiled at the disbelieving look on her face, holding the keys out for her to take.

"Oh my god," Astoria said in a quiet voice. She seemed emotional. "Draco, this is the most amazing thing anyone's ever done for me." She looked up at his face, he looking down at hers.

"And you're the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me. Let's just call this repayment," he suggested, matter-of-factly.

"I love you so much!" Astoria said, ignoring the keys he was holding out to her and throwing her arms around him. Draco had never been hugged so hard in his life, for a second he feared his breathing would be restricted.

"And I love you. More than anything," he told her. They didn't say those three words often, but when they did, you would never have heard two people sound as though they meant it so badly.

A couple of weeks later, Draco was relaxing after a hard day at work. He'd just ordered a take away as he couldn't be bothered to cook. He spent a while lounging around in tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt, awaiting the arrival of Astoria who he had left this morning hidden under a pile of parchment with notes scribbled concerning her plans for her new business. He had no idea where she'd gone but he knew she'd be back soon. He was slightly nervous, as tonight was the night he was planning on asking her to move in with him.

After twenty minutes or so he heard a popping noise and she appeared in the lounge doorway, looking a bit tired, her hair slightly scruffier than usual.

"Hey," Draco said, lazily as she put her bag down and flopped next to him on the sofa.

"Ohh, I am so tired," she said, grabbing a cushion and cuddling it, letting her eyes close as she began to relax.

"Long day?" Draco asked, though he already knew the answer.

"Manic," she told him. "I had a meeting about the business plans, I went to see some suppliers about sample fabrics, and I drew up how I want the place to look."

"Wow, you have been busy," Draco said, impressed, as she leaned over the arm of the sofa with a big groan and picked up her bag from the floor, taking out the drawings she'd done of how she wanted the shop to look. She handed them to Draco, whose eyes scanned over them.

"Babe, it looks amazing. I'm sure we can get it looking like this in no time," he said, confidently. She put her bag down on the floor with another groan.

"Massage?" Draco offered, handing the sketches back to her.

"Oh my god, you're like my boyfriend and my lifesaver all rolled into one," Astoria told him as he began to rub her tense shoulders with skilled hands. Astoria moaned from the pleasure, as he worked her muscles with his thumbs. He worked his way up and down her back then he leant in, placing a soft kiss on the back of her neck, before ceasing the rubbing of her back, uttering only the word 'later.'

"So, what's for dinner?" Astoria asked, laying back across Draco's lap and raising an arm to stroke his cheek lovingly.

"Take away, of course!" he said with a grin.

"Ooh!" Astoria said in excitement. She absolutely loved hers and Draco's take away nights. They'd sit and chat about nothing, they'd maybe watch a film or something, then they'd go and snuggle up in bed and fall asleep.

And that was exactly what they did. The food arrived. Draco had had a tough time choosing between Mexican and Thai. He'd gone for Thai in the end. They ate with some quiet music playing in the background and some candles scattered around the place. After a year and a half, Draco was still a bit of a romantic when it suited him.

They both felt tried and so they headed upstairs straight after eating. Luckily it was Friday so they both had the weekend to recuperate from their hard work. Once they'd settled down under the covered Draco opened his mouth, about to ask Astoria to move in with him but then he changed his mind. Unfortunately his last minute change of heart resulted in a strange noise escaping his mouth.

"What?" Astoria said.

"Nothing, nothing," Draco said hurriedly. He was worried about her declining his offer. "It doesn't matter."

"Oh, come on big man, spill..."

So Draco decided to take a deep breath and go for it. He shuffled closer to Astoria under the duvet, him on his belly her on her back, each looking at the other.

"Move in with me?" he said, quickly.

There was a moments silence and then "What?" Astoria had no idea whether she'd heard him correctly but she was bloody well hoping she had. Her heart started to hammer inside her chest. But instead of simply repeating his question Draco launched into a big speech, Astoria watching him the whole while.

"Astoria, I..." he wasn't sure whether to say everything he was thinking, but what the hell. He'd learnt time and time again that honesty usually benefitted him so he thought he'd throw caution into the wind. "When I open that wardrobe and see your clothes hanging there next to mine it makes me _so _happy. I just want my room to be full of both of our stuff. And my bathroom and my lounge. I don't want them to be mine, anymore. I want them to be ours. I want this house to be ours. I want this to be our bedroom. Our bed. I know you're here loads, Ri, but I want it to be real. I want you to move in with me."

Once he stopped talking, he lay and just look at her and the shocked expression on her face. Then he leaned in so their noses were touching.

"So, what do you say?" he asked nervously, kissing her lightly, almost shyly.

"I say yes! Of course I say yes!" she said, grabbing him and kissing him back.

"You say yes!" Draco couldn't stop himself from yelling excitedly, as he grabbed his girlfriend and pulled her on top of him. He'd never been so happy in his life. They lay for a while kissing passionately, until, forgetting how tired they both were, they disappeared under the duvet and did not reemerge until both were well and truly satisfied.

The next day, the pair were relaxing in the kitchen, enjoying the breakfast that Draco had rustled up, when there was an unexpected knock on the door.

"Bit early isn't it?" Draco mumbled, leaving his Prophet to go and see who it was.

"Draco, it is eleven, honey," Astoria pointed out, and she went to join him as she heard Daphne and Blaise's voices.

"Oh, sorry, did we come around too early?" Daphne asked, spotting that they were both still in their dressing robes.

"You could have warned us," Astoria said, now a bit too aware of how much leg she had on show in front of her sister's boyfriend.

"Sorry, babe," Daphne said, kissing her sister on both cheeks as the guys began to chat. "It's just that we have some news and we wanted to tell you two as soon as possible really."

Draco and Astoria exchanged confused glances as the four of them traipsed into the living room and sat down. Draco couldn't have made it more obvious that he just wanted to get back to his breakfast.

"So? What's this news?" he asked impatiently.

Daphne took a deep breath, with Blaise sat to the right of her, looking slightly apprehensive.

"Blaise and me. We're... we're having a baby," Daphne announced.

Astoria's jaw dropped as Draco spluttered on the juice he'd been taking a sip of, unattractively spraying it everywhere.

"What?!" he said, in between coughs. "A baby?! Now? Like, you're pregnant?!" He looked at Daphne incredulously.

"Yes, Draco, well deduced. I'm pregnant."

"How the hell..?!"

"Well, Draco, when a man puts his penis in a -"

"- Okay, yeah, I get _how _it happened Daphne, but I mean _how_? Did you mean for it to happen?"

Astoria was too gobsmacked to speak, so she left Draco to do the talking. She just sat there looking from Blaise to her sister. The two of them seemed happy but seriously, a baby, at their age? They'd been together a shorter amount of time than her and Draco. It must of been an accident.

"I'm not going to lie, it wasn't planned. As soon as I found out we talked about it, and, well, we decided we want to keep it."

"That day you were feeling sick..." It suddenly dawned on Draco. "I knew something was wrong with you!"

"I'm glad you did, mate, 'cause I had no idea!" Blaise said. He didn't seem quite as happy with the situation as Daphne did. Draco was incredibly surprised about how calm she was being.

"Daph, does mum know?" Astoria finally spoke.

"Yes," Daphne said. "She knows. She hit the roof at first but she's come around now. I think everything's going to be just fine." Draco and Astoria exchanged glances at her words.

"We also have a favour to ask you guys," Daphne admitted, after a few moments of awkward silence. Daphne waited for them to ask but when they didn't she went right ahead and said it. "We - Blaise and me... We'd like you to be the godparents."


	25. Twenty Four: Zila Rose

(sorry it took so long, hope you can forgive me!)

CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR: _Zila Rose_

It took a while for Daphne's news to sink in for both Draco and Astoria. Draco was so surprised by how calm Daphne was about the whole situation, and as for Blaise... Although Draco and Blaise were both working men now, Draco still saw him and his best friends as kids really. Well, not kids, but at least not quite grown up enough to have children. The aspect that Astoria was confused by was how Daphne and Blaise weren't actually _that _close. She didn't think they were really in love. Having a child was such a massive thing.

Nonetheless, she and Draco had both agreed to being the baby's godparents and Draco, surprisingly, was looking forward to stepping up to the role. Since he'd been with Astoria he'd discovered that he was actually not too shabby with children, which had been a surprise to everyone, even himself. Caitlyn especially was very taken with him and he had, on a very rare occasion, looked after her alone. Draco had a sneaking suspicion that Astoria was also looking forward to becoming a god parent, though she never said as much. It had come as quite a shock to her.

A week or so after Draco asked Astoria to move in with him, it actually happened. He managed to take an extra couple of days off work to help her move all of her stuff in, as she put her business planning on hold. Draco arrived at Astoria's home early on the Wednesday morning to find piles of boxes waiting in the hall, as well as a trunk and several suitcases.

"Holy shit," Draco uttered under his breath as he stood alone in the hall way, staring around at all of his girlfriend's stuff. Was there going to be enough room in the house for all of this stuff? He'd started to wish he'd picked something a little bigger but he wasn't to know that two years down the line he'd be moving a girl in with him. To be honest, it was the last thing he'd expected. He would have thought it more likely to make his home a bachelor pad and move Blaise in.

Astoria descended the stairs, smiling from ear to ear. "Morning, roomy!" she greeted Draco, standing on tip toes and kissing him on the cheek. He snorted with laughter at her greeting.

"_Roomy_?" he asked in a skeptical voice.

"Oh, sorry. I was under the impression I was moving in with you today?" Astoria said.

"Well, so was I until I saw how much stuff you're bringing with you!" Draco teased. Astoria rolled her eyes at him.

"Oh, come on! It's not _that _much."

Draco's mouth gaped open in disbelief. Was she blind? He genuinely had no idea how all her stuff was going to fit. He shook his head at her as she laughed.

"So, how did your mum take the news so soon after finding out about Daphne?" Draco asked in a hushed voice.

"Oh, she was fine," Astoria told him, cheerily. "You know how much she thinks of you." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "To be honest, I think she wishes Blaise was more like you."

Draco scratched his head awkwardly. Blaise was relaxed under almost any circumstance. _Too _relaxed. Draco hadn't spoken to him much since finding out about the baby, but he knew that although he wasn't ecstatic about getting Daphne pregnant, he wasn't exactly bothered either.

At that moment Celia appeared in the hallway from the lounge. "Thought I heard your voice," she said to Draco.

"Alright, Celia?" Draco asked.

"Good thank you. Nothing like an unexpected day off work!" she smiled at him as he nodded in agreement. "All ready for the big move?"

Draco exhaled deeply and raised his eyebrows, glancing around at Astoria's stuff again. He didn't really need words to express his feelings.

"Ah, yes," Celia said. "Both of my daughters seem to have this tendency." She too looked around at Astoria's things as Astoria stood with her arms folded. "In fact, Astoria packed far too much stuff before her first year of Hogwarts, we couldn't have taken it all. She cried when I told her she would have to leave some things behind."

"Mum!" Astoria hissed as Draco laughed.

"Well, I'd better try my best with this lot then. Don't want you bursting into tears, do I?" he said, playfully pinching her cheek. She scowled at him.

Some hours later, after all of Astoria's boxes had been successfully moved to her new house and she and Draco had spent some while with and said goodbye to Celia, the pair apparated right onto the top step outside the house's front door. It was already fast approaching darkness; the day had gone so quickly. Astoria turned to Draco and grinned.

"So, welcome to your new home, I guess!" Draco said, grinning back. "I would offer to carry you in and all that, but we're not married yet-" Draco realised what he'd said a bit too late. He'd said 'yet'. He hadn't meant to say 'yet'. An awkward moment of silence ensued before Astoria spoke.

"Yet?" she questioned him. Her heart was beating a bit faster. Surely he wasn't planning on proposing to her any time soon?

"Slip of the tongue," Draco said, feeling himself turn slightly pink and hoping Astoria would just let it pass. Thankfully, she did, though not before she'd given him a funny look.

Astoria went into the house first, heading straight into the kitchen, Draco closing the front door behind him, leaning on it and closing his eyes. He couldn't stop thinking what an idiot he was. _How _could he have said 'not married yet'?! He shook himself and followed Astoria through to the kitchen, winding his arms around her waist and resting his chin on her shoulder.

"Why don't you go upstairs and sort all your clothes into the wardrobe while I crack on with making some dinner?" Draco suggested to Astoria in a low voice.

Astoria smirked. "Hmm, I don't know, Draco. I could get way too used to this." She giggled and he laughed at her before planting a soft kiss on her neck.

"Go on," he ordered her, giving her a light slap on the bum. "Upstairs. And don't come back down until I call you."

"Yes, sir!" Astoria said, mockingly standing to attention, saluting her boyfriend. Draco shook his head, before opening up the kitchen cupboards and selecting half of their contents as ingredients. Astoria made her way slowly upstairs.

Upon reaching Draco's - her - bedroom, she sat herself down on the edge of the bed and stared around. She was still struggling to take this in. Something that had started out as a silly crush had turned into this. She, Astoria Greengrass, now lived with Draco Malfoy. _The _Draco Malfoy. She would never in a million years have imagined this. She smiled to herself as she began sorting through her clothes and arranging them into the wardrobe. Looking at it now, maybe Draco was right, maybe her stuff wouldn't all fit.

Almost two hours later, Astoria did not want to look at clothes any longer. She put on a pair of slippers and padded downstairs, the smell of food hitting her and making her realise how hungry she was. She opened the kitchen door and found Draco with his back to her, head bent. She could make out the apron strings tied behind his back and, if it weren't for everything else, she would have burst out laughing.

There were several candles lit and placed on the table, with some soft music playing in the background. Draco had also laid out cutlery and plates, wine glasses, a selection of breads and Italian meats, olive oil and olives. It was so romantic. Who knew Draco could be such a big romantic? The smile on her face was huge.

Draco turned to see her standing in the doorway staring it him. His face was a little red from slaving over a hot stove. A smile played on his lips when their eyes met.

"Had to make the first night special, didn't I?" he asked. "This is a one off, so don't go getting any ideas!" he added, smirking.

Astoria folded her arms and leant against the door frame, cocking an eyebrow. "Honey, you cook most nights and you always have done whenever I'm here..."

Draco leaned equally as casually against the kitchen worktop. "Yeah, but candles... Music... You don't normally get _this _kind of treatment, do you?" he said, spreading his arms to indicate to everything he'd done.

Astoria smiled and fluttered her eyelashes a little, brushing some stray hair from her face.

"True, Malfoy, very true. Keep up the good work." She winked at him and he laughed heartily as he made his way over to a chair and pulled it out for her.

"Would madame care to be seated?" he enquired.

Astoria giggled her usual innocent giggle as she made her way over and sat down. It wasn't long before Draco was dishing up one of her favourites, spaghetti bolognese, topped with a sprinkle of parmesan cheese. He then seated himself opposite her and poured her a glass of wine, followed by himself. He took a sip and glanced towards her, the candlelight glinting in his eye. They smiled at each other, and then he extended his glass towards her.

"Here's to..." he paused to think. "Here's to... A long and happy life together."

Astoria's smile widened as she brought her glass up to meet his. "I love you," she told him. This was something neither of them said often and that much was obvious as Draco seemed to stumble every time she said it to him. He coughed every so slightly as he swallowed down another mouthful of wine.

"I love you, too," he said certainly, after some moments. Astoria liked that they didn't say those words often because when they did say them, it always felt special.

After a few more moments, they began to tuck in to the delicious food Draco had prepared and chatted about how things were going to be different now they were living together.

"Oh, come on, we were practically living together before, anyway," Astoria pointed out, whilst twirling some spaghetti around her fork.

"Yeah, but now we really are. It's the real deal. I wonder how long before you get sick of me..." Draco mused. Astoria snorted into her meal. The very thought of her getting sick of Draco was beyond ridiculous considering she'd wanted him for so damn long. He really has no idea. Typical man. She shook her head disbelievingly.

"Whatever," she muttered, though she couldn't help smiling.

Draco leant back in his seat, keeping an eye on her. "Come on... I'm a clean freak, I have an obsessive disorder, that's _bound _to bother you at some point. Like when I'm yelling at you to keep the clothes in our wardrobe in order of colour..." he joked.

"Don't joke, Draco, I bet you actually do that!" she teased him back.

Draco's mouth sagged open in shock. "I do not!" he said, defensively. There was a long silence and then, "How about when I'm really busy in the study with work stuff and you're really desperate for sex and I won't give it to you?"

Astoria laughed out loud. "I think I know you well enough to know what to do to make you up for it!" She smirked at him, watching him trying to think of a come back but he couldn't. She was absolutely right, he could never say no.

As time ticked on, all the food and wine slowly vanished and it wasn't long before Draco lead Astoria upstairs by the hand, where, not only had he found a moment to light some candles (she suspected when he went 'to the toilet') but he had even put some rose petals on the bed, too. Astoria suspected she was the only person who had seen and would ever see this side of Draco Malfoy.

He treated her to a massage, before they got down to business - their first time in 'their' bed. Not long after, Astoria fell asleep in Draco's arms as he stayed awake, stroking her hair and watching her looking so peaceful. Then his eyes lingered for a second, on the dark mark that he still bore on his left arm and, for the first time ever, he didn't even care that it was there anymore. He had his girl who loved him for who he really is, and that was all he wanted. Snuggling down under the duvet, he gently moved Astoria's head so that it was resting on his bare chest, and he fell into an easy sleep.

Before they knew it, Draco and Astoria had been living together for six months and everything had gone smoothly. Not once had they argued, though they bickered over silly things, and they'd even managed to establish their 'normal'. Of course, what with Draco constantly working for the next available promotion and Astoria's shop finally open for business, the hours they were together which weren't spent asleep were very few, except for Sundays.

In the week, they would wake up together, get ready for work and eat breakfast at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, Draco often with his nose shoved in the Daily Prophet, a habit which he'd undoubtedly picked up from his mother and one which Astoria was unable to talk him out of. However, she couldn't complain too much as he'd always have something tasty waiting for her when she got out of the shower - crumpets, scrambled eggs and bacon, fruit salad and yoghurt, full english. You name it, he did it. She absolutely could not fault him when it came to his dedication in the kitchen. He hadn't been lying when he told her mother he enjoyed cooking.

After breakfast, each would go their separate ways for work and they wouldn't see each other again until the evening where they would reunite back at home and one would take over cooking duties while the other relaxed. After dinner, they'd relax and unwind; watch a movie, take a bath, drink wine, play cards, ready for the next day at work.

Although they both loved their jobs, they loved Sundays even more. Draco rarely worked Saturdays, but Astoria did. She didn't want to lose the business as Diagon Alley always did a roaring trade on weekends. Draco would sometimes come into the shop on Saturdays to offer a helping hand. She did, however, sacrifice Sunday profits in order for her and Draco to spend time together. They would do something different every week, whether it be visiting one of their family homes, days out in London or Diagon Alley, dinners out or just having lazy days in their tracksuits and cuddling on the sofa. Sunday was definitely the best day of the week. One Sunday in February was very different from all the previous ones, though.

Draco and Astoria had been having one of their lazy days when Celia's owl tapped sharply on the lounge window.

"Oh, jesus!" Astoria squealed, jumping out of her skin. "That thing gave me a bloody heart attack!"

She lifted her legs, which had been draped across Draco, and he crossed the room to let the owl in. The note it carried was brief.

"Daphne's in labour," Draco informed Astoria, glancing up from the note and looking at her from across the room.

"Oh my god!" she exclaimed. They hadn't seen Daphne and Blaise for a few weeks, she'd completely forgotten that her sister's baby was due at any moment. "Oh my god, Draco, get dressed! We have to go... Go and get flowers and... And a card and..." She stood up from the sofa and started dashing around, acting like a mad woman.

'Typical woman' Draco thought to himself, shaking his head and trudging upstairs to change into some proper clothes. He made a mental note to thank Daphne for ruining his lazy Sunday.

An hour later, Draco and Astoria were perched on uncomfortable chairs outside of Daphne's room in St Mungos, waiting to be given the all clear. Astoria was clutching a card and bunch of flowers for her big sister. Draco, on the other hand, was left holding a big cuddly bear for the baby and had never felt less manly in his entire life. His expression was sulky until his best friend and soon to be father came out of the double doors. They heard Daphne screaming from inside.

Draco stood up in surprise, casting the teddy aside on the chair. Blaise looked complete drained.

"Mate, if she squeezes my hand any tighter she's guna snap my fingers off!" Blaise moaned, massaging his own hand. Draco gave him a sympathetic clap on the back.

"Seriously though, bud, what are you doing out here? Daph's guna kill you as soon as she's able..."

Astoria shot Draco a scathing look. Though her big sister annoyed her sometimes, she was very protective of her and it wasn't nice of them to make jokes on her at such a time. Draco felt pressured under his girlfriend's stare.

"Anyway, mate, get back in there," he encouraged, shoving Blaise towards the door. With that, Blaise grimaced and disappeared back through the double doors.

"Reckon they'll come and get us when it's out?" Draco asked Astoria, sitting back down beside her. Yet again, she shot him another scathing look. Draco glanced at her as if to say 'jeez, what have I said wrong now?' and decided not to say anything more.

Two hours later, they were still sat on the same chairs and Draco was beginning to get impatient. He stood and began to pace back and forth in front of Astoria.

"I mean, why did they bother sending us a note if it was guna be this long before the thing made an appearance..."

"Draco, for christ sake, sit down and shut up. And in a few years time, remind that I do not, under any circumstances, want to have a baby with you!"

Gobsmacked by his girlfriend's outburst, Draco sat back down, once again clutching the teddy bear in his hand. He looked down at the floor and didn't say another word until Celia emerged from the room almost another hour later. She was beaming.

"Come in," she said to Draco and Astoria. Astoria snatched the teddy out of Draco's hand who was beginning to feel rather like a naughty school boy, the way she was treating him. He begrudgingly followed her into the room.

Daphne was propped up against several pillows, looking decidedly less attractive than she normally did - no make up, her face was red, her hair stuck to her forehead. She looked completely tired out. Then Draco's eyes wandered downwards as he drew closer, to the tiny bundle in her arms, resting on her chest. Draco could see that Daphne had such a huge smile on her face. They'd been friends for over nine years and were practically related now. He loved her. Seeing her so happy made him happy.

He stopped several metres away from the bed, where Astoria placed the gifts on the side, kissed her sister on the cheek then made a big fuss over the baby. Blaise sat in a chair beside Daphne, looking relieved it was finally over and Celia was sat comfortably on the end of Daphne's bed, still beaming. Blaise looked over towards Draco who just stood watching the scene before him.

"It's a girl," Blaise called out. "You've got a little goddaughter, mate. Zila Rose."

Draco didn't need any words, he just winked at his friend and smiled which Blaise absolutely knew was Draco's way of saying congratulations. After a few minutes, Daphne noticed Draco standing away from everyone else. He was finding the situation rather weird.

"Draco, come here!" Daphne ordered, and the two sister's shared a glance as if to say 'he's a bit useless, isn't he?'.

Draco slowly made his way over and Astoria moved out of the way for Draco to get a closer look. He peered down at the baby, his goddaughter, who in a few weeks time he would swear to protect for the rest of his life. She was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen - so tiny, a gorgeous skin tone, and a tiny mop of black curls. Her eyes were closed.

"Can I?" Draco asked for his permission to hold her, not knowing what had come over him. Astoria's eyes widened in shock and Daphne winked across at her sister as she handed her baby over to Draco.

"There you go, sweetie, go to your uncle Draco," Daphne said in a soft voice.

Draco took Zila as carefully as he could, instinctively knowing to support her head. As he looked down at her, he sort of melted inside. She was a little person, it was amazing.

"Fucking hell," he whispered to himself as he held her in his arms. He used a finger to softly stroke the baby's cheek and her eyes fluttered open, looking into his. He couldn't help but smile.

"Hello," he whispered, softly. "Hello little baby. Hello baby Zila." The gentle words sounded so funny coming from his mouth, Astoria and Daphne couldn't believe what was happening. Astoria hadn't expected this reaction from Draco in a million years.

She watched on tentatively as Zila's tiny hand stretched out and grabbed hold of Draco's finger, which was three times the size as her own. Draco had a dumb smile on his face as he watched the little girl hold onto his finger. He was acting as if there were no-one else in the room.

Astoria couldn't help it, she fell in love with the sight before her. Not even two hours ago, she'd told Draco she never wanted a child with him. Now, here she was, her mind in overdrive, and all she could think about was what an amazing dad Draco would make. From that moment she knew that she had to have a baby with Draco. She wanted to give him something that could make him smile that much - a child of his own. She wanted to have Draco's baby and she didn't want it to happen too far in the future.


	26. Twenty Five: Confessions at Christmas

CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE: _Confessions at Christmas_

Draco and Astoria settled into life as godparents pretty quickly. Their lounge already had several framed photographs dotted around the place - Zila on her own, Zila with Astoria, Zila with Draco, Zila with both of them... By far, Astoria's favourite was the one in a solid silver frame which was upstairs beside their bed. It was of Daphne, Blaise, Draco and herself at the christening, her and Draco holding baby Zila between them. And they all looked so happy. It was a gorgeous photo. Draco looked particularly handsome in a black shirt and trousers, and a green tie. He and Blaise has bought matching outfits especially.

Draco and Astoria took over care of Zila every other weekend to give the new parents a well deserved break. They were finding it very draining and Astoria could see why. However, she couldn't complain. She especially loved seeing Draco with Zila - it turned out that he was a complete natural. One night she'd got out of bed to go to the toilet and heard Draco's voice. She'd walked to the doorway of the spare bedroom and, through the space where the door was ajar, had found Draco in his pyjamas, rocking Zila to get her back to sleep and singing to her, softly. She had stayed watching for a minute, smiling, before heading back to bed, where Draco had joined her a few minutes later.

"You're a natural, you know?" she had whispered to him through the darkness.

"Do you think?" Draco asked, his question genuine.

"Absolutely. You'll make a brilliant dad one day," Astoria had told him.

Draco hadn't responded with words. He just cuddled up closer to Astoria, kissed her softly, and fell back to sleep. It had been too dark for her to see the big smile on his face as he'd threaded his fingers through hers.

In all honestly, Draco was a lot better with the baby than her own father was. Blaise hadn't taken to fatherhood very well. He especially struggled to get out of bed in the middle of the night for her and it became obvious that Daphne's patience was wearing thin. Astoria had overheard a conversation between Daphne and her mother whilst the family were all gathered at Celia's.

"You should see Draco with her, mum, he's amazing," Daphne had said. Astoria had froze, her heart pounding in her chest, when she detected the tone of envy in her sister's voice. "I just wish Blaise could be a bit more like him..." Astoria had decided not to worry about the comments as Daphne sounded exhausted and, well, she was right, Draco was amazing with Zila.

Spring and Summer passed by and things were going very well. Astoria's clothes business, which she had simply named 'Astoria's', was doing well with good profits in both the robes and dress robes she had designed, as well as muggle type attire for the witch and wizard, for example, jeans and hoodies. She was, to her knowledge, the only shopkeeper of this kind in existence and the store certainly proved popular.

Draco was also doing extremely well and had achieved his goal of becoming Nimbus' youngest ever head of department. He was now in charge of quality control and he had some twenty plus people beneath him of whom he was now in charge of. Stripping brooms and checking for undetectable charms had become second nature to him over the last few months and he was very good at his job, hence the promotion.

Once Daphne had began coping okay with Zila, she had decided to spend the inheritance money she got from her father on a house for her, Blaise and Zila. They had picked a detached house with a nice big garden in the countryside in Surrey. Daphne had wanted to be near the city but not _in _it. They had certainly picked an idyllic place to bring up a child. She had settled into motherhood well, despite only being twenty two. Blaise was slowly getting used to being a father and, although the responsibility still scared him a little, he was rather enjoying it.

In the run up to christmas, they all decided to spend the festive period at Blaise and Daphne's. It would be their first christmas as a little family and it made sense to have it at Daphne's. It was a fair bit bigger than Draco and Astoria's place and so there was plenty of room for them to stay and some of the other family members if they wished.

Draco and Astoria arrived in Surrey late on christmas eve morning, completely weighed down with bags full of presents. It was the first christmas that Draco had been earning his own paycheck which amounted to a pretty big sum, and so he'd gone slightly overboard. He and Astoria had spent a whole day shopping for gifts and, at the end of it, Draco had practically passed out on their sofa, he was that tired.

The couple trudged up the driveway towards their home for the next couple of days, the freshly fallen snow crunching under their feet, woolly hats pulled right down over their heads.

"I'm so excited," Astoria said, turning to Draco and grinning. "Our first christmas all together like this."

Draco smiled back. He completely agreed but there was something on his mind - he was hiding the fact that there was something he wanted more than anything. A baby.

He had several reasons to keep this to himself. Firstly, it was traditional and expected that all Malfoys should marry before having children. His dad would be fuming to discover if he were to have a child out of wedlock and he couldn't imagine his mother being overly enamored, either. Secondly, he and Astoria had only been together for three years. Indeed, it was a lot longer than Blaise and Daphne had been together when Daphne fell pregnant, but the shocked look on Astoria's face when she found out was enough to put him off telling her how he felt. Thirdly, Astoria was still only a teenager herself. Draco didn't want to say anything until he was one hundred percent certain she wanted it, too, and right now he was pretty sure she didn't agree. He would have to make do with being uncle Draco for the time being.

"Oh and your mother's coming today, I'd totally forgotten. Draco?"

Draco zoned back in on his girlfriend at the mention of his name.

"Huh?"

Astoria rolled her eyes. "I said I'd forgotten your mother was coming today. For dinner."

"Oh, right. Yeah," Draco said vaguely.

"Are you okay?" Astoria said as they approached the front door which had been decorated with an elaborate wreath.

"Yeah, I'm fine, babe. Why wouldn't I be?" Draco said, smiling as he knocked loudly on the door.

"You just looked in a world of your own," Astoria said then she smiled and brushed a snowflake from his cheek. Draco leaned in and gave her a peck on the lips just as Blaise answered the front door with his spare arm, Zila resting upon his other.

"Happy christmas, bro," Draco said, crossing the threshold with his bags full of presents.

"Cheers, mate. And to you both."

"Happy christmas, Blaise," Astoria said cheerily, standing on tiptoes and kissing him on the cheek. "And how's my favourite little niece today?" Astoria cooed over Zila who was dribbling slightly. She was already ten months old and had grown a fair bit. The time was already flying by.

Blaise chuckled. "She's a greedy little bugger is how she is," he told Astoria as they made their way through to the lounge, Zila beginning to make gurgling noises. "We feed her, it's all gone, and she bursts into tears!" Blaise informed Astoria, sounded bemused.

Daphne was fussing over Draco, who had dumped all the gifts underneath the beautifully decorated christmas tree which now dominated the Greengrass-Zabini living room.

"Take that hat off, you look ridiculous," Daphne told Draco, snatching it from his head.

"Hey, it's bloody cold outside!" Draco said defensively, plonking himself down in a squishy sofa next to the roaring log fire.

"Ri, honey, I'm just in the kitchen preparing the buffet, do you want to come with?" Daphne asked, throwing Draco's hat from out of his reach. She knew he wouldn't bother getting off of his ass to retrieve it.

Astoria followed her sister through to the kitchen to help with food preparation, leaving Draco and Blaise to catch up. It wasn't long before Draco had retrieved his beloved goddaughter from her father's arms. He just couldn't resist.

"Mate, she's growing up so fast!" It had only been a couple of weeks since Draco had last seen Zila, but he still couldn't believe how big she'd got.

"Yeah, I know," Blaise said, watching how Draco held her so confidently in one arm. There was a long silent pause and then Blaise asked in a hushed voice "How do you do it?" He sounded in awe of Draco and Draco looked confused.

"Do what?"

"You just make it look so easy. And I've heard Daph and Astoria talking, saying how you get up with her in the night to feed her and that. You're ten times better at this stuff than I am. Daphne's always calling me useless and she's probably right. I struggle to even get out of bed when she's crying..."

Draco watched his friend closely, and could see that he genuinely wondered how he could be better. Draco wished he could tell him how he did it but, truth be told, he had no idea.

"I dunno, Blaise. I really don't know... I mean, when I get up in the night it's just automatic. I suppose it helps that I've never really been a heavy sleeper."

Blaise snorted with laughter. "Unless you've had a few pints and then you can't be woken for shit!"

Draco laughed. "True! But seriously, I wish I could answer it, mate, but I can't. But you don't have to worry about things like that. This kind of thing must take some getting used to, right? I guess it's easier for me because I know I can just give her back at the end of the weekend whereas she's your life now."

Blaise nodded, listening to Draco's words intently. Draco couldn't believe how seriously his friend was taking this chat.

"You're proper good at it though, mate. You're guna make such a good dad one day." The hint of jealousy in Blaise's voice made Draco feel a but uncomfortable. He wished he knew what to say but he didn't. Luckily the girls came back through soon after.

"Oh, Draco, look at you and my little girl," Daphne said, wandering over and perching herself on the arm of the chair in which Draco was sat. "The way things are going, you're going to have to start trying to make one of your own."

Draco glanced quickly in Astoria direction as he handed Zila back to Daphne, hoping to catch some flicker of a reaction to Daphne's words. No such luck.

That evening there was a larger gathering of people in the lounge. Narcissa and Celia had arrived, as well as aunty Annette with Caitlyn and Kayden in tow and grandma Etta who was getting more and more crazy as the days went on.

"Oh, hello, young man," she had greeted Draco, walking over to him and pinching his bum. He'd jumped about half a mile. It wasn't exactly something he'd been expecting and unfortunately both his mother and Astoria had witnessed the event. Astoria didn't stop laughing for a good fifteen minutes and even his mother had struggled to regain composure once she'd started laughing. Draco had chosen to say nothing.

As usual, Draco had been coaxed into playing exploding snap with Caitlyn. It had been nearly two years since they first met but they still had to play every time they saw each other. Kayden was much bigger than he had been on their first meeting and he wandered over and clung to Draco's neck.

"Hey Draky," he said in his innocent voice.

"No, no, no, no, no," Draco said, swinging an arm round and lifting Kayden round into his lap. "It's Drac-o, not Drak-y. Draco. Draaaacooooo."

Kayden giggled devilishly. "Okay, Draky," he said and, escaping from Draco's grasp he ran off. Draco rolled his eyes. He loathed being called Draky no matter who it was by.

As the evening went on, Daphne and Astoria put together an amazing spread for everyone to help themselves to. Draco grabbed a plateful and went and sat himself with his mother who had just finished having a catch up with Celia. He hoped that she wasn't feeling uncomfortable as the only member of his family there. Narcissa smiled as he sat down next to her on the sofa.

"Draco, I'm so proud of you," was the first thing that she said.

"Why, what have I done now?" Draco asked, biting into a chicken leg.

"Celia's been telling me how good you are with baby Zila and I've just been watching you now with Caitlyn and Kayden and I'm just so proud of you Draco. I wish your father had been twice the man you are."

"Mum..." Draco said, reproachfully.

"Draco, I mean it. Look at what we let happen to you when you were just sixteen. And now look at you. You're only twenty one, and look at you... Quite the family man..." Her eyes started to well with tears. She'd drank a little too much wine. Draco pulled her in for a hug.

"Mother, it's christmas, stop being ridiculous. You didn't let anything happen to me, I let it happen to myself. And who knows, maybe it made me the person I am today."

Narcissa smiled at her son. She was so terribly proud that he would never understand.

A couple of hours later it was time for the kids to go to bed, else santa wouldn't come as Draco had to remind a stubborn Caitlyn who, once again, was clinging to his leg. Slowly the family members began to leave until it was only Draco, Astoria and Narcissa left. Of course, Draco and Astoria were staying over. Draco decided to apparate his mother back home as she'd consumed a fair amount of wine. When he returned Zila was fast asleep in her cot and everyone had changed into their bedclothes and were sat in the lounge waiting for Draco to return, four glasses of whiskey ready to see in christmas.

Draco hot footed it upstairs and routed through his sports bag, discovering that Astoria hadn't packed his trackies and t-shirt. He made his way back downstairs.

"Umm, Ria," he said as he entered the lounge. "Where's my bed stuff? I could only find these?" he said, holding up a pair of thick pyjamas covered in pictures of reindeers. The three exchanged glances and all looked as though they were trying not to burst into laughter.

"Please tell me these are not what you packed for me?" Draco pressed on, giving Astoria a hard stare. She started shaking from struggling to hold in her laughter, biting down hard on her own lip.

"Babe?" Draco addressed her.

Blaise was first to crack, followed by Daphne, followed by Astoria. The three of them sat roaring with laughter as Draco stood, still clutching the reindeer pyjamas in his hand, not taking his eyes off Astoria who couldn't bring herself to make eye contact with him.

"Oh come on, Draco, it's christmas. We thought you were in the festive mood so... We thought you'd like them," Daphne told him.

Draco shook his head and without saying a word, left the room and went back upstairs. They had completely screwed him over, he wanted them to think he was angry when actually he was changing into the reindeer pyjamas. He could hear them all still laughing their heads off downstairs. When he was changed he looked into the full length mirror. He was _never _going to live this down.

Once the laughter had died down he went back downstairs and, as soon as he reached the lounge doorway, everyone was howling with laughter again. Astoria literally had tears streaming down her face. This time Draco joined in. He looked like a complete idiot but what the hell, he was only with family.

Once everyone had recovered from the hilarity of reindeer covered Draco, they picked up their glasses of whiskey, clinked them together and with christmas wishes they drank them down.

"Now, come on Draco..." Daphne said after a couple of minutes. "We _have _to have a picture of you in those!" She produced a camera from behind her back. Draco shook his head in disbelief.

"Right, come on then," he said with a sigh. He leaned in close to Astoria and grimaced for the photograph while Astoria was in fits of laughter once again.

"This is going on the first page of the album," Daphne informed him once the deed was done.

"Mate, you're never guna live this one down!" Blaise pointed out. "We'll show Zila in a few years time... 'Here's you're uncle Draco on your very first christmas...'"

"Yeah, and she's guna think 'God, my uncle is the _coolest_'" Draco said, sounding more confident than he felt. Once again, everyone erupted into laughter.

A short while later everyone headed up for bed, ready to be up bright and early for Zila to open her presents.

Astoria and Draco snuggled up together in the bed Daphne had made up for them. Draco pulled Astoria in close.

"You do realise that I _will _get my own back at some point, don't you?" Draco said in a hushed voice (Zila was fast asleep in the next room).

Astoria giggled quietly. "Yeah, right. We'll see..."

"Hey! I'm Draco Malfoy. I don't let people do this to me and simply get away with it." He began to tickle her playfully. She squealed and wriggled around until he stopped.

"Are you saying that people have forced you into wearing reindeer pyjamas before?" Astoria asked, breathless from being tickled.

Draco laughed. "No, darling. I mean I don't let people embarrass me and get away with it..."

The pair of them laughed and then cuddled up close to each other once again.

"I had such a brilliant day," Astoria said quietly. "I knew I would."

"Me, too babe," Draco said. "I can't believe this is our third christmas together."

Astoria smiled in the darkness. "I know..." She paused for a long moment to think. Thoughts were running through her mind. She wanted to bring up the topic of babies with Draco, as she'd thought about it a lot since Zila was born, but she wasn't sure how to. "You make me so happy, Draco."

Draco smiled and pulled her in for a kiss. It was long and passionate. After three years, the chemistry between them still hadn't faltered.

"You make me happier," he whispered.

After another few minutes silence, Astoria said "Isn't it great seeing Daphne and Blaise with Zila. They're a little family."

"_We're_ a little family," Draco corrected her. Astoria's heart dropped a little as she took this to mean that Draco was satisfied with the family he had for now. Should she say anything or not?

"Draco you're so amazing with Zila," she told him. "I told you before that you'd make an amazing dad and I really meant it."

Draco's heart rate picked up. What was Astoria hinting at? It couldn't be...? He decided to just be honest.

"The last few months, I've... I've been thinking a lot about - about, you know, me... you... babies," he confessed to Astoria, whom he was still holding tightly in his arms.

Astoria looked up at him though the darkness, completely shocked.

"You - do you mean that you want to try for a baby?" she asked him.

"Yes," Draco said immediately. And then "I mean, yes I _would _like to but only when you're ready."

Both of their hearts continued beating rapidly. They'd both been wanting this conversation to come up for a while and yet neither had believed the other was ready. There was another long silence and then it was Astoria's turn to make a confession.

"I haven't taken my potion for nearly a week... I - I've just been so busy I kept forgetting and we've both been too tired for sex anyway and -" but before she could finish what she was saying, Draco's lips had met hers and he carefully clambered on top of her.

"Are you saying that you're not protected any more?" Draco wanted to be sure of what Astoria was saying.

"I suppose yes, that is what I'm saying..." Astoria whispered back. She gasped as she felt Draco's erection digging into her from below the sheets. Her hands were shaking ever so slightly in anticipation as she brought them up to stroke his hair.

"Let's do it, Ria," Draco whispered in her ear. "Let's try..."

As soon as he'd spoken they couldn't move quick enough. Within seconds they were both naked and got straight down to making love. Weirdly, it felt different. It felt like there was more of a connection between them than ever before and the pair of them were so spurred on by what the end result could be that it didn't take long for it to be over.

Draco had taken Astoria's hands in his and lifted them above her head. He'd been panting away on top of her, giving her everything he had. He'd come to climax and almost collapsed on top of her, overcome, his whole body shaking as he leaked out inside of her. He was biting down on a pillow hard so as not to make a sound. She held onto him tightly as he came. The connection was unreal. After a minute, Draco rolled over onto the bed beside her, his breathing still extremely heavy. That was undoubtedly the best orgasm he had ever had. He hoped they would be successful for at least the first few tries if he was going to feel like that every time.

The pair were so exhausted that they fell asleep almost immediately after, hand in hand, both sleeping easy after sharing the thoughts that had been on their minds for so long.


	27. Twenty Six: The Best Ever

CHAPTER TWENTY SIX: The Best Ever

Draco and Astoria awoke on Christmas morning and instantly remembered what they had discussed and, more to the point, what had happened the night before. Draco felt kind of confused, almost like he'd dreamed it. He looked across at Astoria who looked across at him.

"Did that actually happen last night?" Draco asked her dumbly. She smiled the most beautiful smile in response and rolled closer to him.

"Do you mean did you try your hardest to make me a baby?" she asked him, running a finger up and down his bare chest. "Yes, Mister Malfoy, that definitely did happen."

Draco smiled upon being reminded of how great the sex was. And, of course, the fact that he may have just made himself a dad-to-be although, of course, it was unlikely on a first try. He couldn't believe this was actually happening. He grinned at his girlfriend who was still smiling.

"Happy christmas, baby," she said in a quiet voice.

"Happy christmas, beautiful," he said back, leaning in for a kiss.

"Draco, I just wanted to say... About last night... I - I don't want you to get hooked on this idea of me getting pregnant." She had to say it because she could already see how excited the thought of becoming a dad made him.

"What do you mean?" he asked, worried she'd had second thoughts or something.

"I just mean that I don't want you to get obsessed. I know what you're like. You like things to be perfect and now, every time we have sex you're going to think it's 'a try'. I don't want you to think like that. I just want us to have sex like we always have and if it happens it happens."

Draco raised his eyebrows in surprise. Once again, it was if Astoria was inside his mind. And she absolutely had a fair point. He would become obsessed and that probably wouldn't be healthy for him or their relationship.

"Okay," he said, nodding understandingly. Astoria smiled again as a thank you. Although she'd love a child with Draco, she wasn't about to break down in tears if she didn't get pregnant in the next couple of months or even years. It was just nice to know that, with their trying, they were completely dedicated to each other. If it happened it happened. If it didn't it didn't. They were still so young, they had plenty of time.

"Come on then, big man. Put on your reindeers, let's get downstairs - presents to open."

Draco _still _hadn't lost his love for presents and it complete showed when he jumped up and keenly put on his reindeer pyjamas as soon as Astoria had said the word. She laughed at how completely childish he could be sometimes.

When they got downstairs, they found Blaise bouncing Zila on his knee as Daphne made breakfast. Everyone said their happy christmases, did hugs and kisses and then they watched as Zila tore open her mountain of presents. She was still far too young to understand christmas but she loved the rustling sound of the paper. She giggled madly. Draco was watching her, smiling.

"I think someone's guna take after their aunty Ria with a giggle like that!"

Astoria pushed him playfully. "I'd rather she had my giggle than her uncle's taste in pyjamas..."

"Oh ha bloody ha!"

Draco had completely spoilt his goddaughter; he'd bought clothes, toys and, without Astoria's knowledge, a tiny broomstick.

"Jesus christ, Draco!" Astoria had exclaimed when the little girl had torn off its wrapping. "Typical! Incase you didn't notice, that's a little girl not a boy!"

"I know but I couldn't resist!" Draco said.

Blaise had laughed his head off. "Ah, mate! That's awesome that is!"

The five of them settled down to christmas lunch at around two o clock which was prepared by Draco. He slaved away for several hours cooking turkey, potatoes, veg and pigs in blankets to perfection. Everyone agreed that it was the best christmas dinner they'd ever had, all making greedy noises around the table and not a scrap of food was left.

"Don't tell mum we said that though!" Daphne warned Draco. "She'd kill us."

"Where'd you learn to cook like this mate?" Blaise asked. "Daphne said you don't use magic when you cook, too? Maybe you should teach me..."

"Yes, maybe he should!" Daphne piped up, as though it would be all of her dreams come true if Blaise learned to cook even beans on toast.

After dinner Blaise and Astoria cleaned everything up while Draco had cuddles with Zila before Daphne took her up to sleep. Then the adult christmas began with lots of drinks, many exchanges of presents and plenty of board games which, naturally, were played very competitively. It was truly the best christmas Draco had ever had.

He had unwrapped his gifts from Astoria which had all been fabulous as always, though they'd 'agreed' not to spend much on each other this year. She had given him some cufflinks for when he dressed smartly for work meetings, a bottle of his favourite aftershave, several bars of Honeyduke's dark chocolate, a couple of new shirts and a wand stand because he was constantly leaving his wand on the bedside table and it was rolling away and falling down the back.

Now it was time for Draco to do a bit of acting for a while. He thanked Astoria very much for her presents and then expressed concern that she'd bought him rather a lot.

"Umm, we err, we said we weren't going to spend too much this year, babe..." he said in an anxious tone. "So, well... Wow this is embarrassing... I didn't spend very much on you." He scratched his head awkwardly. He then handed her a couple of wrapped packages, winking to Daphne and Blaise as she opened them. They were one hundred percent in on his plan.

Draco had given Astoria a fancy notepad for jotting down her design ideas and, outrageously, an apron for when she cooked on occasion. This was, as far as she was concerned, all he had got her. She kept the smile on her face, though she did feel a little disappointed inside. Ah well, she thought, christmas was about the company not the presents and she was having a fantastic time. She hugged Draco and thanked him as he kept up the pretence.

Several hours later it had got dark outside and much alcohol had been consumed, not to mention more food. Everyone was feeling rather sleepy and was lazing around in the lounge except Blaise who had gone upstairs to feed Zila.

Draco was bored of keeping his joke going now. He'd got a much bigger surprise in store for Astoria than a notebook and an apron. On his way back from the kitchen, where he'd collected yet another bottle of butterbeer, he turned to Astoria and casually said "Oh, don't forget to pack your suitcase when we get back tomorrow," before flopping back down into an armchair. Astoria looked at him, completely confused.

"A suitcase? Why?"

"Oh well, you don't have to," Draco shrugged. "I just thought you might want to take a suitcase to New York on thursday."

Astoria froze and stared at him. Had she just heard him correctly? Had he had too much to drink? Did he know what he was saying?

"What?"

In a casual voice, Draco repeated, "We're going to New York on thursday. You may want to bring a small suitcase with some clothes and such like in it."

"Are you - are you messing with me?" Astoria had always wanted to go to New York and Draco knew that. If he was playing a joke on her it was really, really mean.

Draco turned to Astoria and raised an eyebrow. "Ri, I thought you'd have learnt by now that the presents I buy are slightly better than notepads and aprons."

Astoria stared him down for a good ten seconds and he started back with a straight face for as long as he could until a grin appeared. That was when Astoria started screaming with excitement. She jumped up from her chair and flapped her arms wildly.

"Oh my god, oh my god! Draco! How could you do that to me! Oh my god!"

He loved seeing her so happy. He stood to join her and she jumped on him, straddling his waist, planting kisses all over his face just as Daphne and Blaise came back into the room.

"Steady on!" Blaise said upon witnessing the love.

"You told her then!" Daphne said, smiling at the pair of them who had once flatly refused to admit that they even had feelings for each other. Now look at them.

"I love you! I love you, I love you, I love you!" Astoria squealed, hugging Draco extremely tightly. He laughed and hugged her back. "When do we go?"

"Thursday afternoon, portkey's all sorted with the ministry," Draco told her. "Looks like me and you are going to spend new year up the empire state or whatever they do over there..."

Astoria's face lit up even more, if that was possible. "We're there for new year?!"

"Yep," Draco said, putting her firmly back down on the floor.

Astoria launched herself at him once again, her arms flying around his neck. She had literally never been so thrilled. "Ha! I love you, Draco!"

A few months later, Astoria still hadn't recovered from the fact that she and Draco had spent new year together in New York. She was literally the luckiest girl in the world. They'd seen all the sights, eaten fantastic food, and in between all the touristy bits they'd spent a lot of time 'trying' in their hotel suite. She really couldn't ask for anything more in her life right now.

For Draco it had just been worth it to see the smile on Astoria's face. He'd known she'd always wanted to go to America, especially New York and all it took for him to make that happen was money and what was money? He would throw every last knut he owned in the bin if it made Astoria happy.

It was now late April and Draco and Astoria had passed a few milestones together, now. Shortly after they'd spent their third christmas together they'd celebrated being together for three whole years. The following month had been Zila's first birthday and Astoria had just celebrated her 20th. Things were going extremely well, especially on the baby making front. Although they'd had no success so far, they were having great fun trying.

One morning a letter looking suspiciously like it was from Hogwarts arrived with Draco's prophet.

"I wonder what this could be?" Draco pondered aloud over his bowl of cereal. He hastened to open it but, upon reading the letter, his face became stony. Astoria was watching him carefully. "It's an invitation," Draco informed her. "To a memorial service for all those who died in the final battle at Hogwarts. It's the four year anniversary on the second."

He looked up towards Astoria, looking anxious. The very idea of attending this immediately made him feel panicky. He passed the invite over for her to read.

"I don't want to go," he announced, as her eyes scanned the parchment.

Astoria looked up at him. "Come on, don't be too hasty... We'll talk about it when we get home from work."

The relaxed Draco that Astoria had become accustomed to suddenly vanished. He grabbed his jacket and stood up to leave though he hadn't touched his prophet or even finished his breakfast.

"There's nothing to talk about. I'm not going," he said sternly. He kissed Astoria on the cheek and with that he left the house without another word, leaving her feeling very concerned about the thoughts that could be running through his head. They hadn't spoken about what had happened to him since way back on the night of his graduation almost three years ago. He'd been so happy the last couple of years that it was almost as though he'd forgotten about the torture. This invite had obviously brought it all back. Astoria hoped he would open up and talk to her that evening.

Sure enough he did. She returned home to find Draco lying on the couch, staring up at the ceiling, the invitation resting on his chest.

"Sorry about this morning," he said, as soon as she came in the room. "I just saw this and I thought of everything, you know... I hadn't given it a seconds thought in nearly a year. It wasn't nice..."

Astoria perched herself on the edge of the sofa next to him and kissed his forehead. "I thought that's why you acted a bit strange."

Draco nodded solemnly. "I'm uncertain of whether I want to go or not," he told her truthfully. She waited for him to continue speaking. "I should go... I never told you this but Snape basically died for me... Voldemort knew that he had to kill the master of the elder wand to beat Potter. He thought the master was Snape but actually... It was me*. And Snape knew it was me and he said nothing. He died for me..."

Astoria looked at Draco, stunned.

"I think I should go, at least for Snape," Draco went on. "You know, when I got recruited by the death eaters, he made an unbreakable vow to protect me. With my mother..."

Yet again, Astoria was stunned into silence. She hadn't known any of this and she expected she was now one of the only people that did.

"I should go for him, shouldn't I?" Draco asked.

Astoria thought for a moment. "Well, I think you should but, let me hear the reasons why you don't want to go first."

Draco took a deep breath. "Because I know I won't be wanted there. I was on the other side, the wrong side. For a long time. I've still got the dark mark. People are there to remember the people who died and I was on the side that was doing the killing. I don't have any right to be there."

Astoria looked Draco in the eye and felt nothing but pity. She could see that he was genuinely confused and upset. She took hold of his hand.

"Draco, you went to the right side. You did the right thing in the end because you were the better person... _You_ didn't kill anyone. You _stopped_ people being killed. And people _you_ cared about were hurt and killed, too. You have every right to be there."

Draco looked back at her. How did she always know what to say? If it wasn't for her he'd still have told absolutely no-one about his torture, it'd still be eating him up inside and he probably wouldn't be the happy person he'd become.

"Let's go," he said suddenly. Astoria leaned down and hugged him tightly. "You give me the confidence to do anything," he whispered in her ear as they hugged. She let out a weird noise that sounded half way between a laugh and a sob, as she held him closer, her fingers tangling in his hair.

"You're an amazing man, Draco Malfoy."

Seriously, what had he ever done to deserve her?

Just over a week later, Draco arrived at Hogwarts for the memorial service, along with Astoria, Blaise, Daphne and baby Zila. Once again, he and Blaise had gone for matching outfits (this was becoming a habit); pristine white shirts with thin emerald green ties and black trousers and shoes. They both looked very handsome, as opposite in looks as they were. Astoria had decided to wear a summer dress covered in rose print, Daphne had gone for a purple dress and Zila had been dressed in a beautiful little green dress that Draco had bought for her. For a man, he had good taste in girls' clothes. The group of them edged their way down a row of seats halfway between the front and the back. Draco sat with Zila on his knee as he seemed to be the only one of them who was capable of keeping her quiet.

None of them noticed Potter arrive, along with Granger and the whole Weasley clan in tow, though the magical foursome (Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny) fronted the gang.

"Is that Malfoy with a _baby_?!" Ron said, squinting in Draco's direction with a look of repulsion on his face.

"Looks that way," Harry said, looking for empty seats somewhere towards the back.

"What the... The baby's black! Is that _his_ kid?!" Ron asked.

"Ron, for god sake, stop being so ridiculous!" Hermione squealed. "Of course it's not Malfoy's baby. It's Zabini and Daphne's baby. Draco and his girlfriend are the godparents."

"Christ, the poor kid..." Ron said. "Makes you wonder how the poor little bugger's gunna turn out..."

Ginny stared at her brother. His tactlessness never failed to amaze her.

"How do you know all that anyway?" Harry asked Hermione. The four of them started edging down some seats a few rows behind Draco and the others.

"I read the announcements in the Daily Prophet," Hermione said, simply. "And Draco's certainly done well for himself... He's a HoD at Nimbus, now."

"Oh, big whoopdeedoos!" Ron said sarcastically. Hermione rolled her eyes but Harry was the one to actually say something in Draco's defence.

"To be fair to him, he's earned it, as far as I'm aware. I mean, it's not like he could have used his name to get him anywhere after what happened..."

Hermione and Ginny nodded in agreement with Harry while Ron just scowled. He certainly was one to bare a grudge, even if he hadn't seen the person for three years.

The ceremony got off to a good start. Everyone rose from their seats to sing a song, and some words were said by many different people including McGonagall, who was now retired, and Harry Potter. Draco sat and listened intently until Zila started kicking up a fuss. He decided it was best to take her away for a minute or two.

"Give her here, Draco, you've had her for ages," Daphne whispered.

"Don't worry, I'll just take her for a walk," Draco whispered back, standing and edging past people with Zila resting on his arm. Naturally, he earned a couple of wary looks from people in the audience as he walked past and, of course, Weasley was one of them. Draco felt good to know he had matured before the gangly idiot.

After the memorial there was a spread and drinks but Draco decided to leave. After all, he'd only attended for Snape. Potter had said some good things about Snape, some of which had moved Draco. At no point throughout the service had he cried, though he'd half expected himself to at some point. He didn't struggle with his emotions as much as he'd used to.

A whole month later Draco got home after a long day at work and could not wait to unwind in the bath. It was now the weekend, not to mention it was his birthday on Sunday. When he walked down the hall, casting aside his jacket, he noticed Astoria sat in the lounge. She normally arrived a little after he did.

"Hey, babe. What're you doing home?" he asked upon entering the room. Astoria looked up at him, a vacant expression on her face. She looked slightly lost. Draco couldn't stop wondering what had happened as she failed to answer him for several long moments. Eventually Astoria opened her mouth to speak as Draco stood over her, looking concerned.

"Draco, I'm pregnant," Astoria said. Though they'd been trying for five months now, she looked kind of shocked. Draco's eyes widened. Had he heard her properly?

"What?!" he half yelled.

"I'm pregnant..." Astoria said, then her vacant expression was replaced with a smile spread. "Draco, you're going to be a daddy!"

"Holy shit!" Draco said, bringing his hands up to his head. It was a lot to take in - he'd almost forgotten that they were trying, since Astoria told him not to obsess over it. "Holy shit! Ria, we're having a baby!"

Then he began laughing. Astoria stood up but Draco lifted her right off her feet and spun her around. She didn't think she'd ever seen him look so happy. _She'd_ never been so happy.

Draco set her back on her feet, looked her right in the eye and kissed her. He kissed her like it was their first kiss. Like he couldn't mean it any more.

"Astoria, you've just given me the best birthday present ever!"

And he meant it. Five years ago, he'd been at the lowest point he'd ever been at in his entire life. If someone had told him then that in five years he'd be expecting a child he wouldn't have believed it. He wouldn't have even wanted it. But now, it really was the best birthday present he could have been given.

(*Draco didn't realise that the power over the elder wand passed from him to Harry in Malfoy Manor as he wasn't even aware he had power over it until after the battle of Hogwarts)


	28. Twenty Seven: A Terrible, Terrible Dream

(warning: the following chapter contains upsetting scenes)

CHAPTER TWENTY SEVEN: _A Terrible, Terrible Dream_

Four months on and Astoria's pregnancy was going well. Her and Draco had already attended a couple of scans and had decided they wanted to know the baby's gender before it was born. They were having a girl - Daddy's little girl, as Draco called her.

Almost everyone had been extremely happy for them when they'd found out their news. It came as a pleasant surprise to Draco that even his mother seemed to be delighted. Maybe it was because she had seen how good he was with children at Daphne and Blaise's last christmas eve. Daphne and Blaise had been particularly over the moon for Astoria and Draco, especially because they could see just how good a parents they were going to make. And, just as Draco and Astoria were Zila's godparents, Daphne and Blaise had agreed to fill the same position for their little girl when she arrived.

Seeing as Astoria was actually pregnant now, she would have felt a spoil-sport if she'd stopped Draco getting excited - and so she hadn't. And he'd certainly blossomed without her restricting his excitement. The spare room was already decorated for the arrival and he had spent an absolute fortune on everything a baby could possibly need.

Considering that they were only twenty and twenty two years of age, Astoria still occasionally struggled to get her head around the situation but it was the life they'd chosen for themselves and they were happy. That was all that mattered.

The only person that perhaps hadn't taken the news as well as others had been Draco's father. Draco had tried to come up with excuses to avoid telling him the news but there was no way that his mother (or Astoria, for that matter) would have let him get out of it. And so, for the first time since his imprisonment, Draco went to visit Lucius in Azkaban.

The experience had been very strange. They had not seen each other for four years. The last time Draco had seen his father he had been a boy and now he'd grown into a man. Maybe not the man his father had wished for but, he liked to think, a man ten times better.

The conversation had been awkward to say the least. Draco had not told his father the reason behind his visit and so, at first, they tried to just make general small talk which failed miserably. Eventually the topic of conversation changed to Astoria, as Lucius had enquired after her. From there, Draco had gone on to tell Lucius that his girlfriend was pregnant.

"Unplanned, of course. How very careless of you," Lucius had almost spat at his only son.

Draco had scowled like a sulky teenager. How dare his father turn around and patronise him when they hadn't spoken in four years? "It was very much planned, actually," Draco had said flatly.

Lucius had been shocked. "Well, I see no wedding ring on your finger. Are you and the girl even engaged?"

"Her name is Astoria," Draco had said through gritted teeth. "And no we're not married, we're not engaged. We're happy. And that's all I care about." He was sick of worrying what his father would think. He wasn't a child any more. He wouldn't live in fear. He would sit with his head held high and be the person his girlfriend and unborn child deserved him to be.

The conversation had not got very far past that point and Draco had left, entirely expecting never to see his father ever again.

It was a fairly chilly Friday in September when Draco had been let off of work at lunchtime. Very happy about this, he had popped to the shops to see if he could find something lovely for his little girl.

Whenever he thought of her, he smiled to himself like a complete idiot. He absolutely loved Zila to bits so he couldn't even imagine what he would feel for his own girl once she was born. Now, every night, before he and Astoria went to sleep he would kiss Astoria goodnight and Astoria's tummy. Though he made her swear no to tell anyone that he did that. He still had a _slight _reputation left to uphold.

He arrived home an hour later with a couple of cute baby-grows that he absolutely could not wait to show Astoria.

"Babe, I'm home!" Draco called out as he entered the house. He knew Astoria would be home as she'd hired some extra staff in order to be able to take some extra time off in preparation, even if baby wasn't due for another eighteen weeks. There was no reply. "Ria?! Wait until you see what I've bought. You're going to love them."

He slung his coat and scarf over the bannister, checking the lounge and kitchen for Astoria. She was nowhere to be seen.

"Babe?!" he called again, from the bottom of the stairs. When he failed to get a reply he made his way up the stairs. She'd probably popped to the shops or something. He checked the bedroom to see if she was there, even the study, but nothing. Yep, she'd definitely gone out.

Then he made his way to the bathroom and was momentarily rooted to the spot at the sight which met his eyes. Astoria was on the floor, leant up against the wall, drifting in and out of consciousness. And there was blood. Everywhere.

"Holy fuck!" Draco yelled, rushing to his girlfriends side. His heart was racing and he felt physically sick. There was more blood on the bathroom floor than there had been that time Potter used sectumsempra on him.

His hands were shaking violently as he knelt down next to Astoria who was groaning quietly, her eyes rolled back into her head.

"Astoria! Astoria!" Draco shouted, taking her face in his hands. "Astoria, talk to me!"

"Dr-Draco," Astoria whispered. She was so very weak and Draco noticed tear stains on her face. How long had she been lying here like this?

"Astoria, how long have you been here? Please, tell me!" Draco was borderline hysterical. All kinds of horrible thoughts were rushing through his head. Was Astoria going to be okay? Was his baby okay? "Astoria, how long? Babe, please... Please speak to me."

Astoria struggled to speak. She was loosing consciousness again. "I-I don't... don't know," was all she managed to say.

"Oh fuck! Fuck, fuck! Don't worry my angel, everything's going to be okay. You're going to be fine!"

He sprinted into the bedroom to fetch Astoria's dressing gown, though he felt as though his legs were going to give way as he ran. There was so much blood, he'd never seen so much blood. That day in the bathroom at Hogwarts, as he'd lead there bleeding, he'd thought he was going to die. What if Astoria didn't make it. He couldn't live without her. What if the baby, his baby girl, wasn't okay?

He ran back to the bathroom and lifted Astoria away from the wall to put her dressing gown around her. She was shaking. Then he lifted her in both arms and apparated with her to St Mungos, to the maternity department they'd visited for the scans. She was no longer conscious.

"HELP!" he yelled, the second his feet touched the floor. "SOMEONE PLEASE! HELP ME!"

Immediately, three healers ran over and were horrified by the state Astoria was in. He recognised one of them from school. She'd been in his year. It was one of the Patil twins, he didn't know which. Not that it mattered right now.

Before he knew it Astoria was being rushed to theatre on a hospital bed and she was gone from his sight. He stood there, alone. He felt as though he should be crying but he couldn't. There weren't any tears. Just shock. He owled his mother whilst he waited for Astoria to be seen to. His heart, his mind, were both racing. What ifs were all he could think of. If anything happened to Astoria or the baby he could never forgive himself. He didn't say much in the letter to his mother, he just told her to get there as quickly as she could.

Half an hour later she was there. That was his mother all over - always there when he needed her. She found him crouched down outside the theatre room, leaning against a wall, head in his hands.

"Draco," she said in her gentle voice.

Draco looked up and he'd never been so happy to see his mum in his entire life. He stood as she walked over and embraced him in a tight hug.

"What happened?" she asked softly.

"I-I don't know," he said dumbly. "I just got home from work and found her in the bathroom. Fuck, mum, there was blood everywhere. What if something happens to her? What if something happens to our baby?"

Narcissa had never seen her son so distraught and it killed her to know there was nothing she could do. All they could do is wait. And so they did. For nearly three hours they waited outside until a healer emerged from the room. Draco looked to her hopefully.

"Mr Malfoy?" the healer sought his confirmation.

He nodded and swallowed, his mouth incredibly dry. "How is she? How's Astoria?" he asked. He felt as though he was going to vomit, he was so worried.

"She's going to be just fine," the healer told him.

Draco relaxed as though the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders. His mother rubbed his back soothingly.

"And the baby? How's my baby?" Draco asked, watching the healer. Her face became a little anxious at his question.

"I'm afraid, Mr Malfoy, that your baby did not make it. Your girlfriend suffered a miscarriage."

Suddenly Draco felt as though his world had come crashing down around him.

"NO!" he shouted. "No! No, this can't be happening! It can't be!" He slid down the wall behind him until he hit the floor where he began to sob uncontrollably. "Not my little girl. Please, please not my little girl. Please." He sounded so desperate.

Tears started to leak from the corners of Narcissa's eyes as she watched her son collapse in front of her. She hadn't seen him cry since he was a small child. It was terrible.

The scene deeply saddened the healer, who had always hated delivering such news. "I'm terribly sorry for your loss," she said in a quiet voice, before making herself scarce.

Draco remained sat on the floor crying, his face screwed up and buried in his arms. He didn't want to believe what he'd been told. He stayed there on the floor crying for a good half an hour before he wiped his face and looked up towards his mother who looked at him with great sadness.

"I'm going to have to tell her," he said out loud, more to himself than anything. Telling his girlfriend that their baby had died was going to be the worst thing he'd ever had to do.

An hour later he was allowed in to see Astoria. She was sleeping peacefully, no idea of what news she was to discover when she awoke. Celia had turned up just after Draco went in to see Astoria - Narcissa had sent her an urgent owl as she had to know but Draco was not up to writing. Blaise and Daphne also knew, and were planning on arriving as soon as they could. But Draco didn't want to see them. He didn't want to see any of them.

He stayed vigilantly by Astoria's side, holding her hand tightly, until she began to stir. It was going to take him every ounce of courage in his body to tell her what had happened. But he couldn't break down, he couldn't cry again. He had to be strong for her.

Eventually she opened her eyes and turned slowly to the side to see Draco looking worried as hell.

"Hey," he said, smiling at her when she looked at him. She smiled back. Then, within seconds, the smile had vanished. She suddenly seemed a little panicky.

"Draco," she whispered, her eyes wide. "The baby? Please tell me the baby is okay..."

The silence which followed combined with Draco solemn expression revealed that, quite obviously, everything was far from okay. Draco shook his head slowly, but did not let go of his girlfriend's hand. Neither did he break eye contact with her.

"Ria, I'm so, so sorry," he whispered. "We lost the baby."

"No," Astoria whispered back, frantically shaking her head. Tears began to cascade down her face. "No, Draco, no..."

Draco felt as though his heart had been torn out and stamped on. He was fighting back the need to cry again. He hated seeing Astoria like this and he hated what had happened to them. He nodded slowly, sadly, then wiped away his own tears from his eyes, before moving from his chair to lay down on Astoria's hospital bed with her. He wiped away her tears with his thumbs then he pulled her in close and she lay sobbing in his arms. Only a few hours ago they'd been the happiest couple in the world and now their world had been torn apart.

Astoria cried and cried like she'd never cried in her life until there were no tears left in her. Draco just held her in his arms and stared at the wall straight ahead of him. He would look away from the wall only occasionally, to kiss the top of Astoria's head if she'd shudder from a particularly violent sob. Draco felt completely numb. He couldn't speak, he could barely move. All he could do was wonder how the hell they were ever going to get over this.

After a while, the Patil twin entered the room. He learnt from her badge that it was Padma, the one that had been in Ravenclaw.

"Hi, Draco," she said in a quiet voice as she approached the bed. Astoria lay so still and, now, silent in his arms that Draco thought she'd fallen asleep. He hoped for her sake she had because she'd probably be a lot happier. He looked at Padma but he couldn't bring himself to speak. "You're family are outside," she informed him. "But I'm guessing that you're not quite ready for visitors yet."

Draco looked away from her, back towards the wall. "No, we don't want to see anyone," he said in a mono-tonal voice. One day he would appreciate all the support his family were willing to offer, but now was not that time. Right now it needed to be just him and Astoria.

"Yes, it must be a hard time for you both," Padma pointed out the obvious. Amazingly Draco found it in himself to let out a single, harshly sarcastic laugh. Then he said nothing. "I'm terribly sorry for your loss," Padma said, before quietly leaving the room to tell the family members that they were not currently needed.

Draco literally did not move a muscle for hours. He didn't speak, he didn't eat or drink. All he did was hold Astoria in his arms. Eventually she had fallen asleep through exhaustion. His eyesight was starting to blur from where he'd been staring at the blank wall for so long. Many hours later another healer entered the room.

"Can I stay?" Draco asked as soon as she came through the door. "I can, can't I? I need to. I can't leave her."

The healers were obviously fully prepared for this kind of interaction. "Yes, Mr Malfoy, of course you can stay. Understandably, you must be with your girlfriend at such a time."

"Thanks," Draco said, though he wasn't at all grateful. He'd like to have seen them try to make him leave.

Finally, at some absurd hour in the morning, Draco moved. He gently lay Astoria's head down on the pillow whilst he made a visit to the toilet. Then he returned and slipped under the duvet of the bed to join her. There, he pulled her sleeping form back towards him and he held her tighter than he ever had before. He'd already lost one of his girls, there was no way on earth he was going to lose the other.

After almost another hour of all sorts of thoughts running through his head, Draco eventually drifted off to sleep. Just before he drifted off he'd hoped for only one thing; that he could wake up and this would all be a terrible, terrible dream.


	29. Twenty Eight: Miscarriage of Guilt

CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT: _Miscarriage of Guilt_

Astoria was kept in St Mungos for a couple of days under close observation. She had suffered severe blood loss, just as Draco had under the sectumsempra curse. The only time Draco left the hospital was to go and collect a small bag of her things for her, as well as stopping to buy some magazines, chocolates and flowers in an attempt to cheer her up.

She'd been strong for him in the past, now it was his turn to be strong for her. Admittedly he was struggling. It was taking a lot of effort for him to wake up in the morning and put on a smile for her but he had to. It had to be done.

The day after Astoria suffered the miscarriage, Draco asked Daphne and Celia to come by and visit her. He'd turned them away to begin with because he just couldn't cope with the news. The next day he'd realised that it wasn't fair to stop them from seeing Astoria at such a sad time. He was incredibly grateful for their support, he just couldn't show it right now.

He'd sat outside of Astoria's hospital room for a whole hour while Daphne and Celia sat with her and comforted her. At one point he'd pushed the door open to go and join them, but he had noticed straight away that Astoria was crying and so he'd decided to stay out of the way. There was nothing more he could do or say to make her feel any better especially when he was feeling so shit. He had sat back down on the chair and cried silently to himself.

As a child he'd struggled greatly with his emotions, or rather, lack of them. Even throughout his early school years he'd been incapable of crying, and his mother had even feared that he was incapable of love. Draco never said the words 'I love you' to anyone when he was growing up and it was only since his sixth year that he'd developed the ability to cry because of his emotions. He'd been so terrified of what was going to happen to him that he would cry often. Since then, he had cried when he told Astoria about his torture, and he'd cried when they'd discussed the same matter again. It was as though Astoria had made him feel that it wasn't a bad thing to cry. Which was just as well because now, as he sat and wiped away his tears, he wondered if he was ever going to be able to stop.

Luckily for him he did, just before Daphne and Celia emerged through the doors of Astoria's room. Daphne looked down at him piteously. She knew straight away that he'd been crying, his eyes looked extremely red and sore. He was practically family to her now, and it hurt her just as much to see him like this as Astoria. She went over to him and crouched down in front of him, obstructing his view of the floor.

"Draco?" she said softly, taking his hands in hers.

"Don't, Daph," he said, pulling his hands away from her as though he were scared of something. But she was persistent. Instead of holding his hands she rested hers gently on his legs.

"Don't push us away, Draco," she said, quietly as Celia attempted to make herself scarce. "You need us. You can't do this alone."

Draco choked up at her words. "Can't do this alone? I can't do this at all!" he cried, as his eyes began to swim with tears again. "I can't fucking do this Daphne! I can't cope, it's like, I feel like my head's going to explode. How the fuck can I ever get used to the fact that my baby died?"

He began to sob, as Daphne stood in order to put her arms around him and hug him tightly. She felt so, so sorry for him. If anything, it seemed to her as though he wasn't coping as well as her sister was. Eventually Draco gave in and hugged her back, sobbing into her shoulder. She stroked his hair soothingly.

"Draco, I'm not going to lie to you, it's going to be hard for a long time. But you _will _get over this. Together. You and my sister are made of stronger stuff than to let something like this ruin you." Daphne was extremely confident and entirely believed what she was saying. "And we're going to be here for you every step of the way."

"Thanks," Draco whispered in between sobs.

"Don't you dare thank me. As if you wouldn't do the same for me..." Daphne said gently as she stopped hugging him and held him at arms length. "Now come on, stop these tears, and go back in there with Ria. You need each other right now."

Draco nodded and wiped his eyes furiously with his sleeve. He hadn't changed clothes since he'd brought he in.

Just before Daphne had left, Draco told her that Astoria would be discharged the following afternoon but asked that no-one visit them for a couple of days. Daphne had of course respected his wishes and told him she would visit as soon as they felt ready.

The next day, Astoria and Draco returned back to their house. Draco did everything he could to make sure Astoria was comfortable, and had already been sure to clean up the mess of the bathroom when he'd returned to pick up her overnight things. He'd been told by his boss to take as much time as he needed of work, for which he was very thankful. He had no idea when he'd feel up to returning. He was sure everyone at work would know what had happened and, weirdly, he felt some kind of embarrassment. Besides, he had to do a good job of looking after Astoria, who would still wince with pain every time she moved.

Draco made sure that she had everything she wanted. He brought the duvet down from upstairs so that she could snuggle up underneath it. He'd made her soup and fresh fruit juice and gathered a whole collection of films for them to watch - something to take their mind off of it, even if it was only for a moment.

They'd received a couple of 'with sympathy' cards which were appreciated, but the two of them decided not to display them anywhere as it was a constant reminder of what had happened. Draco used the flowers to brighten up the place, though.

Half way through a film, Astoria needed the toilet and Draco rushed to help her up.

"Draco, I can go to the toilet on my own you know. I'm not disabled, I had a miscarriage!" she snapped at him. She didn't mean to, he was just crowding her a bit too much.

Draco stopped and stared at her. The way she so flippantly yelled that she had miscarried hurt him. A lot. He knew he shouldn't snap back at her but he couldn't bite his tongue.

"Oh, thanks for that, Astoria! Did you think that I didn't realise already considering I've spent the last two nights crying myself to sleep?!"

Astoria hadn't expected Draco to shout back. He'd been like some kind of saviour to her the past couple of days. It suddenly hit her that she hadn't once considered how he was feeling in all this. She looked up at him from the sofa and saw pain in his eyes. Pain and exhaustion. She'd been so stupid.

"Draco, I'm-"

"Oh, forget it," he said harshly. "I'll be upstairs if you need anything," and with that, he left her sitting alone in the lounge and retreated to the bedroom to be alone.

Astoria immediately felt wracked with guilt over how little consideration she'd given Draco. It must be killing him too, if not more. Yes, she was devastated, but she hadn't been crying herself to sleep every night as he apparently had been. She wanted to go after him but she decided it was best to leave him alone for a while.

Almost two hours later Draco had not come back downstairs and Astoria was starting to worry. She eased herself up from the sofa and slowly made her way upstairs, hobbling ever so slightly. When she got to the bedroom door she found Draco lead on his side of the bed, facing away from her. She made her way around the bed and perched herself on the edge. He didn't even acknowledge that she'd entered the room, he just lead there staring into space. She noticed that he was holding a small teddybear he'd bought for their unborn child. It broke her heart to see him like this. That was when she realised that he _really _wasn't coping.

"Draco," she whispered, trying to get him to look at her. Nothing. "Draco I'm so sorry. You were making such a big fuss of me that I didn't stop for a second to see how much this is hurting you. I've been such an idiot. I'm so, so sorry."

She stretched out an arm and softly stroked his hair off of his face. Still no reaction.

"Draco, I don't know what else to say. Please speak to me," she pleaded. This was a time when they needed each other more than anything, they couldn't fall out now.

Draco sighed and looked away from the window, towards his girlfriend. Still he didn't speak, he just looked at her with sadness and then held his arm out for her to cuddle up. Astoria was very pleased with this progression. She cuddled up to him.

"I hope your not mad with me," she said quietly.

"I'm not mad with you," Draco confirmed. "I was just trying so hard to make sure you were okay. You didn't have to yell at me like that. I'm hurting too, you know."

"I know, honey, I'm sorry," Astoria apologised again and then the pair of them stayed there just cuddling in silence for ages. Draco seemed lost in thought, Astoria wondered what was running through his mind. She thought she'd better not ask though.

As the days passed by, Astoria seemed to be improving. She was finally adjusting to what had happened to her and Draco and she began getting on with things as normal, though she hadn't yet returned to work. Draco, however, was a completely different story.

The more time that passed the more and more Draco seemed to spiral downwards. Instead of coming to terms with what had happened, he was struggling more and more. When Astoria had been back at home for two weeks, Draco has become so bad that he would just spend the whole day lying in bed. He would barely speak, and he would go days at a time without hardly eating anything. Astoria was becoming extremely worried.

One day, it got so bad that she decided to owl Narcissa. Draco just would not communicate with her, and she didn't know what else to do. She knew that, eventually, he would accept what had happened and move on, but it really didn't seem as though it would be any time in the near future. She thought maybe Narcissa could help. She wrote:

_Narcissa,_

_I'm really worried about Draco. Instead of coming to terms with what's happened he seems to be getting worse. He's spending all day lying in bed, he'll hardly speak and he's not eating. I don't know what to do. Please could you come over? You might be better at getting through to him than I am._

_Astoria_

Upon receiving Astoria's letter, Narcissa turned up at their house immediately. She greeted Astoria, as usual, with a kiss on both cheeks as she crossed the threshold.

"Oh, dear, how have you been?" Narcissa asked, examining Astoria to see if she looked healthy.

"Not too bad," Astoria told her. "I'm just so worried about Draco. I thought he would have been okay by now but literally, it's like he's broken down. I can't get through. It's starting to scare me."

She went through to the lounge and the two women sat. Upstairs Draco could hear his mother's voice. He knew it would only be a matter of time before Astoria called in reinforcement. She was bound to find out eventually what of a mess he was. He'd actually been okay the past few years. He was completely messed up in sixth year, and seventh year but he thought he'd actually changed for good. Now this had happened, he'd become a mess all over again. It was only a matter of time before Astoria gave up on him, surely?

"Astoria, sweetheart, there's one thing you should know about Draco... He's always been a little messed up in terms of emotions. When he a child I worried that he didn't really _have _any emotions. Well, he had anger and such like but I was afraid that he couldn't love or be sad. He never once told anyone he loved them as a boy. It wasn't until he grew much older that he allowed himself to _feel _anything. And occasionally it's as if he spent so long pretending his emotions didn't exist that, when they do get the better of him, he can't control them. I take it you know about his sixth year?"

Astoria nodded, paying attention to everything Narcissa was saying.

"Well, if there's one thing you should know, it's that he became very ill. He barely slept, he stopped eating-"

"That's what he's doing now!" Astoria said, suddenly panicking a little. She remembered Draco telling her that he'd considered killing himself. She couldn't bare the thought of him thinking those things again.

"Oh, dear, don't worry yourself sick over him," Narcissa said, pulling Astoria into a hug. Astoria hugged back, beginning to get a little teary. "He will get out of this dark place that he's in. I know he will. I know my son. It'll just take him a little while that's all. He so desperately couldn't wait for your little girl to arrive. He's taken a huge blow."

Astoria nodded in agreement as she wiped away her tears with the back of her hand.

"Just don't you worry. I'll go up and see if I can't have a little word with him. I'm sure he won't want to see me but I'll try," she said gently, giving Astoria a wink and with that she left the room.

Narcissa knocked on the bedroom door, which was open, and saw her son lying piteously on the bed. He didn't tell her to go in so she went in anyway, closing the door behind her.

"Draco, sit up," she said quietly but firmly. He ignored her. "Draco. Sit up, it's time we had a chat." He continued to ignore her. She sat herself down on the bed next to him. "Draco, either I can sit and rant at you for the next half an hour or you can sit up and we can talk about this together. Your girlfriend is worried sick about you downstairs. Pull yourself together for five minutes, please." She was speaking to him as though he was half his age, but she knew her son, and she knew it would work.

Eventually he moved, and propped himself up again the headboard, though he didn't look at her.

"Draco, look at you. The weight is dropping off of you. You know that you can't stop feeding yourself!"

He shrugged sulkily, still refusing to look at his mother. In his head he knew he was being ridiculous but he couldn't find a way of snapping out of it.

"Son, what happened to you was a terrible, terrible tragedy. But that poor girl downstairs is as heartbroken as you are over this and you're lying up here all day every day refusing to let her in. I thought you loved her?"

"I do love her!" Draco said fiercely. How could anyone doubt his love for Astoria?

"Well then, you need to try showing it. She can't get through this on her own, you know, and it seems as though that's what you've left her to do."

Eventually Draco looked round at Narcissa. She could tell from his eyes that he was exhausted.

"Have you been sleeping?" she asked him, her tone softening substantially.

He shook his head.

"Oh, sweetheart," she said, and she pulled him towards her for a hug. Much to her surprise, he let her.

"It's just killing me, mum," Draco finally opened up. "My little girl... I never even got to meet her... Would she have looked like me? Maybe she'd have been beautiful like her mum..."

"I know, I know," Narcissa said, sympathetically. "It is a cruel world we live in. But Draco you have a girlfriend who loves the bones of you and will be here for you no matter what. Remember that christmas in your last year, you picked her that rose and you told me about her. About how she would never be interested in you?"

Draco nodded, and even raised a slight smile as his mother ceased hugging him.

"Well, for christ sake, don't push her away now. You're perfect together. Please don't let it destroy you, Draco, because if you carry on like this then that's what's going to happen."

It suddenly dawned on Draco that all he had to do was tell Astoria why he was behaving like this. His mother had made him see sense.

"Okay, mum, I'll talk to her," he said, quietly.

"Good lad," his mum said, and with that she kissed him on the top of his head, gave him one last squeeze and left.

After Astoria had thanked Narcissa and seen her out, she went upstairs to talk with Draco. She was pleased to see him sat up in bed rather than buried down under the duvet. This, in itself, was an improvement. She sat down on the bed next to him. Draco reached out and took hold of her hand.

"Sorry for the way I've been behaving," he said.

"You don't have to apologise for anything," Astoria told him. "This was probably the biggest shock that we're ever going to have in our lives. Draco, you're heartbroken, that's nothing to apologise for."

"No, but that fact that I've been pushing you away for the past two weeks is," he said. "The fact is... It's guilt."

Astoria was stunned into silence. Guilt? Why did he feel guilty? She waited for him to continue speaking.

"We lost our baby and it's all my fault. If it wasn't for all of the bad things I've done, this wouldn't have happened. You'd still be carrying our child and we'd still be happy and..."

As Draco spoke it suddenly began to sink in to Astoria's mind that what he was feeling was guilt. She couldn't believe he'd been coping with that feeling on his own for two whole weeks. Of course, he was in no way right. This was not his fault at all. But she got it. She understood him. Weirdly, relief washed over her.

"... I was such a bad person, something like this was bound to happen to me eventually. I deserve it. It's to teach me a lesson, I know it is."

His words saddened Astoria, who hugged him tightly. "Draco, don't be ridiculous. None of this is your fault. And you absolutely do not deserve this!"

Draco had began to cry again. Astoria's heart totally went out to him. "I do!" he cried. "I almost poisoned someone to death, I almost killed an innocent girl, I let the death eaters into Hogwarts so they could kill Dumbledore, I disarmed Dumbledore so he was defenceless, I put someone under the imperius curse, I used the cruciatus curse on two people, I was so wrapped up in myself that my friend died _because_ of me, and Snape died _for_ me... How is it even possible that I _don't _deserve this?!"

Astoria was shaking her head furiously. She took his face in her hands and peered into his eyes. "Because, Draco, you are a good person. Your heart is in the right place. And ever since that war, you have tried and tried to be a better person and you are. You are the kindest, most caring person I know and you are the best boyfriend I could have asked for. So don't you dare say that you deserve this!"

Once Astoria had said her piece, silence hung over them. Though Draco didn't agreed with what she said, he was grateful for her words. As his girlfriend hugged him tightly, he hugged her back. Maybe he didn't deserve the death of his baby but one thing he was certain about was that he did not deserve this girl.

"I love you, Astoria" Draco said, holding her close, tangling his fingers in her hair.

"I love you, too, Draco. More than anything."


	30. Twenty Nine: You Saved Me

CHAPTER TWENTY NINE: _You Saved Me_

Slowly but surely, Draco and Astoria's lives started getting back to the way they had been. Once Draco had confessed his feelings of guilt, he found it a little easier to move on. Admittedly, certain things had been awkward to begin with - Blaise wasn't brilliant at dealing with emotionally charged incidents and so had avoided seeing Draco for a while simply because he had no idea what to say to his best friend. And then there was the issue of Draco and Astoria looking after Zila again. Astoria hadn't been sure how soon was too soon for Draco to start looking after his goddaughter again without refreshing the pain of losing his own baby.

Eventually, a couple of months after Astoria's miscarriage, she and Draco discussed looking after Zila on alternate weekends again. Draco had been apprehensive to begin with; he hadn't been back at work for very long and he wasn't sure whether he was ready enough yet. But Astoria had gently suggested that they take her for one weekend and if he didn't feel ready they could leave it as long as he liked. Draco had agreed and so, one weekend in November, Daphne dropped Zila off at their home after checking, double checking, and triple checking that Astoria and Draco were absolutely sure they were ready.

Astoria had insisted as Draco carried Zila through to the lounge. Astoria had kissed Daphne goodbye and wandered through to the next room to find Draco sat on the carpet and Zila toddling towards him. She was a year and nine months now and, as well as walking, she also had a limited vocabulary. Astoria and Draco had been renamed 'Ri' and 'Da-co' which was certainly an improvement from 'Draky' in Draco's opinion.

Astoria watched on, smiling, as Draco picked Zila up, lead on his back on the floor and lifted her high above him, before bringing her down to give her a kiss.

"I can't believe how well she's walking now!" Draco said in amazement, looking up at Astoria.

Astoria smiled. "Yeah, she'll be riding that bloody broom you got her before you know it!" she said, laughing.

Draco laughed, too. "Yeah, I'll be giving her lessons. Everyone knows I'm a much better flyer than Blaise..."

"Modest, too!" Astoria said, sarcastically as Draco grinned and placed Zila back on the floor before picking himself up.

"It's nice outside," he observed, staring out of the window. "We should wrap her up and take her out somewhere."

"Good idea," Astoria said, smiling. She was so relieved that Draco seemed completely back to his old self at long last.

And so the pair of them pulled on coats and scarves, wrapped Zila up warm and took her out for the day. They went to a new toy shop which had opened down Diagon Alley, where Draco spoilt her, as he always did. Then they went for some lunch and a walk around one of the parks in central London. It was a perfect day, and Draco and Astoria decided to settle down with stir fry and a bottle of wine once Zila was safely and snuggly tucked away upstairs. She usually slept through the night now.

For the past couple of hours Astoria had been pondering whether now was a good time to bring up the issue of trying for another baby with Draco. She'd been debating the matter with herself now for a couple of days and now she had seen Draco completely comfortable around Zila, she thought it might be a good time to bring it up. She slightly feared that he would become upset or angry but the issue had to be confronted eventually. She wanted to know how he felt as she was completely open minded about whether they try again now, or not.

Later on in the evening, she decided to take the plunge and bring up the subject. Draco was sat up one end of the couch, resting on the arm, and she was lying against him. His arm was draped casually around her shoulder. He took a long sip from his wine glass.

"Draco, I was wondering..." Astoria began thoughtfully. "What are your thoughts on trying for another baby?"

Draco swallowed hard and stared down at her, completely dumbfounded. If he was honest, he hadn't even considered it. It was as though his mind had told him that his one and only chance was gone.

"I - I hadn't even thought about it," he admitted, his voice quiet.

Astoria let out a sigh of relief. He hadn't become upset or angry like she'd feared.

"Oh, that's okay babe, I was just wondering, you know. Incase you were dead set for or against it..."

Draco leaned forward and placed his glass down on the coffee table before settling himself back against the arm of the couch. Astoria had really set him off thinking now, and he remained quiet for a very long while.

"How do you feel about it?" he asked her, eventually.

Astoria peered up at his face and their eyes met. They both remained unblinking. "I'm not really sure," she said, softly.

Draco thought for a moment before speaking. "Do you want my honest opinion?" he asked.

"Of course," Astoria said, hoisting herself up so she could sit and face him and they could discuss this serious matter properly.

"I think," Draco said, slowly. "That we should try again. But not now. Imagine if that happened all over again... Astoria, I've only just come to terms with it, if - if that happened again, I seriously do not... I don't think I could take it. I think it would destroy me."

The pair didn't take their eyes off of each other. Draco was being completely honest with Astoria, as he always was; he'd never shared a bond like this with anyone else in his entire life. Astoria nodded, appreciative of Draco's total honesty.

"I want to try again," he went on. "I want to be a dad more than anything, Ria. More than anything. But I think... I think the way I dealt with what happened to us just proved that I'm not ready yet. I don't think I'm a strong enough person."

Draco dropped his gaze to the floor, as though he were ashamed of himself. But he had absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. And still, he was only twenty two. He didn't need to be a dad now, or indeed any time in the near future.

Astoria listened intently to what Draco said, and his words, his lack of faith in himself made her feel sad. She strongly disagreed. But she knew he wouldn't accept her words if she told him that - he was stubborn and he was often very hard on himself. She thought of a better way to word it.

"You're not strong enough, and neither am I. But we _are_ strong _together_," Astoria said, reaching out and taking her boyfriend's hand. In a couple of months they would have been together for four years. They'd been through a lot together and she truly believed that they could get through anything.

Draco looked round at her and smiled a small smile. He continued to simply look at Astoria for a long while. Her smile was warm, like her eyes. She made him feel happy, she made him feel loved. He had never felt this way about anyone before her and he couldn't imagine feeling the way he did about anyone else. At that moment, his mind was cast back to a conversation he'd had in Azkaban with his father and it was at precisely that moment that he decided there was something he needed to do. And he needed to do it soon.

That night, Draco lead Astoria upstairs to their bedroom where they made love for the first time since what had happened. It was tender and it was loving. Draco leaned down and kissed Astoria's forehead as he gently thrusted in and out of her then he rested his forehead against hers as their eyes stayed connected, their lips meeting occasionally. Draco stroked Astoria's hair from her face as her body gave in and she came for him. Much to Draco's delight, her arousal leaked down his hard cock as he continued making love to her. It wasn't long at all before he followed suit. His orgasm was intense. It had been a long time since he'd had one. He let out a strangled cry as it coursed through his body and he collapsed beside Astoria who was smiling at him.

"That was so beautiful," Draco said, softly, smiling back at his girlfriend.

Astoria's smile widened. "You said that after the very first time we made love," she recalled out loud.

Draco was shocked. "You - you remember?"

"Of course I remember," Astoria whispered. "How could I forget?"

Draco pulled her towards him and kissed her passionately. Then he broke the kiss. "It was nearly four years ago. I can't believe you remember," he said, incredulously.

"I remember everything," Astoria whispered, placing a light kiss on Draco's thin lips and not long after, the pair of them fell into the first easy sleep they'd had in a long time.

Five months later and, though Draco and Astoria didn't feel anywhere near ready enough to start trying for another baby, the pain of the miscarriage had finally subsided completely and the pair of them had moved on for good. They didn't even talk about it any more. There was no need to. It was in the past, just a bad memory.

Today was Astoria's twenty first birthday and Draco had something special up his sleeve. After finishing a fairly long day at the shop, Astoria arrived home to find Draco dressed in a smart navy blue shirt and black trousers, his hair slightly scruffy. She found herself hoping that he never grew out of his boyish good looks.

"Oh, and how come you're looking so smart?" Astoria quizzed him, giving him a hello kiss.

Draco shrugged. "Is it not a special someone's twenty first birthday today? Sorry, I must have got the wrong day..." he teased.

"Alright, alright... What have you planned, Mr romance?" Astoria asked him. She couldn't help but grin, Draco was always brilliant at surprises. Not once had she been left disappointed.

"Jeez, no pressure," he said, exhaling deeply. "Just... just a meal, I'm afraid. Me and you. I hope you weren't expecting -"

Astoria held a finger to his lips. "Ssh, I wasn't expecting anything. A meal with my man is just fine by me!" She smiled. "How long do I have to get ready?"

"Ah, that's the downside I'm afraid. Table's booked for fifteen minutes time..."

"Holy shit, Draco! Fifteen minutes?! Look at the state of me!" Astoria cried, dashing towards the lounge door.

"Well, you _are_ late home!" Draco called after her as her heard her charging up the stairs. He sat himself back down. 'Well, at least she doesn't have to pick an outfit' he thought to himself. He'd bought her a stunning, deep purple dress she'd been banging on about for ages. He'd hung it on the outside of the wardrobe so she couldn't miss it. The squeal he heard a few moments later confirmed to him that she hadn't.

Ten minutes later Astoria appeared in the dress, her make up delicately touched up, and she looked absolutely stunning.

"Fuck the food, I want to have you for dinner!" Draco growled as he pulled her in for a kiss.

Astoria giggled madly as Draco's lips grazed her neck. Then he looked at his watch. "Right, we need to be off. Don't want to lose our booking!" he declared.

Two minutes later he and Astoria were outside one of their favourite restaurants, a French place a couple of miles from their home. The food there was very fancy, and very very expensive, but Astoria was worth every last knut. And Draco had recently been informed that he was heading towards yet another promotion at Nimbus so it wasn't like he was short on cash.

He held the door open for Astoria like a gentleman. As they entered the restaurant he noticed a sick feeling in his stomach. He put it down to nerves. He really hoped tonight was going to go as planned. He subtly fumbled at his trouser pocket to ensure that the small box was still there. It was. He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Hi," Draco greeted the waiter who met them at the door. "Malfoy. I have a table booked for two." He winked at the waiter. Astoria thought it strange that Draco should wink at a waiter, especially as he was male, but decided not to say anything.

"Ah, certainly, Mr Malfoy, follow me," said the waiter, who was dressed in a tuxedo. Draco gave Astoria a smile and the pair of them followed the waiter through the restaurant and around the corner to a large room, separate from the rest of the restaurant. And there, sat around a large table was Celia, Daphne and Blaise with Zila, Narcissa, all of Astoria's aunts and uncles, her cousins, her nan and a few of her friends from school including Albany, as well as couple of hers and Draco's mutual friends. In total there were around twenty five people gathered around the table.

"Happy birthday!" they all yelled as Draco and Astoria rounded the corner and entered the room.

"Oh my god!" Astoria yelled, her hands covering her mouth in surprise. Draco laughed heartily at the shock written all over his girlfriend's face. He'd always been a pretty convincing liar which certainly disconcerted his mother at times. But it did have its uses, this being one of the examples. Astoria had genuinely had no idea Draco had planned all of this.

As the levels of chatter and laughter rose throughout the room, Astoria made her way around the table greeting everyone with Draco in tow. A few of her school friends he didn't really know at all, but had quizzed Daphne for names and contacted them to invite them to the party. He wanted her twenty first to be truly special.

As he and Astoria settled themselves between Narcissa and Daphne, three waiters began bringing through bottles of champagne on ice. Astoria's eyes widened.

"Draco, how much are you spending on this?" she asked, worried.

"Who cares?" Draco said, dismissively. "What's money? You're worth a million times the gold I have in my vault." He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, trying desperately hard to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach which continued to linger.

Half an hour later, after Draco had proposed a toast to Astoria, plates and plates of fine food were brought through to the table: steak, beef stew, duck, chicken, veal, potatoes, fries and vegetables. Enough to feed the whole ministry by the looks of it.

The atmosphere was amazing. Astoria had all of the people she loved surrounding her, all thanks to Draco. She honestly couldn't remember a time she'd felt happier. Before she and Draco had got together she had seriously doubted not only her feelings for him, but him as a person. As she sat and looked around her, she couldn't help but think that, in all honesty, Draco was about as far away from a death eater as she could imagine, ignoring the ever-fading mark on his left arm. She'd never felt so looked after and loved in her whole life and by no means did she come from an unloving family. In fact, quite the opposite.

As the evening went on, plates slowly started to empty along with the champagne bottles. It eventually reached a point where everyone was comfortably full and nothing more could be consumed, although this point took several hours to reach.

It was getting late and Draco's heart had began to beat a little harder against his ribcage. He knew it was getting close to the time where he had to do it. Soon people would begin to leave, especially as it was way past the children's bedtimes. And so he swallowed, cleared his throat and rose from his chair.

"Can I have everyone's attention?" he called, tapping a spoon against his champagne flute.

"Oh, not another speech," Blaise grumbled loudly, trying to wind up his best mate. But Draco merely smirked and ignored Blaise's comment.

"First of all, I'd really like to thank you all for coming tonight. To make Ria's day special I really needed each and every one of you here, so thanks for that."

Astoria was sat in her seat beside him, looking up at him and smiling. She was feeling ever so slightly light headed from the champagne. She wondered how long Draco was going to hold court for because she really just wanted to hug him tightly.

"Secondly, I didn't just want you all here tonight because it's Ria's birthday. I must confess that I had an ulterior motive." He glanced briefly at Astoria, as he fumbled nervously with his trouser pocket. "Me and Ria, we've been together for a long time now. More than four years... I can't believe how she's put up with me for this long!" Everyone around the table laughed.

Daphne suddenly noticed Draco fiddling with his pocket and it dawned on her what was about to happen. Her eyes widened in surprise but she didn't say anything.

"As you know, it's not always been easy for us. We're still, really, only young and we've been through a lot." Draco's voice faltered slightly. He was, of course, referring to the miscarriage. Astoria glanced at the floor momentarily before looking back up at Draco. He went on. "I'm pretty certain though, that we could get through anything."

Draco looked around at all the faces staring up at him and suddenly felt even sicker. Nonetheless, he continued.

"Astoria," he said, firmly, turning to look down at her. "You are, without a doubt, the best thing that has ever happened to me. Honestly I - if I didn't have you I don't know where I'd be right now." Astoria's eyes began to swim with tears as she smiled up at him. "I was a very different person before I met you. You made me better. You... you saved me. You are the most beautiful, kind, caring, amazing person I've ever met in my life." Draco reached inside of his pocket and withdrew a small, velvet green box. "I don't think that I could be here without you. I love you, so, so much."

Astoria wiped her tears away before they left her eyes. She didn't want her face all tear stained, especially now it had just dawned on her what was about to happen. Draco pushed his chair away from him and bent down onto one knee.

"Astoria Greengrass," he said quietly. "Will you marry me?"

He opened the box to reveal a dainty but beautiful ring, sparking with delicate diamonds and emeralds. The whole room was silent, until

"Yes!" Astoria yelled, getting up from her chair. "Yes, yes, yes!"

Draco's face lit up, as he got off of his knee and Astoria threw her arms around his waist. He hugged her so tightly, before taking her tiny hand and slipping the ring onto her engagement finger. Of course, it fitted perfectly.

The room, which had remained quiet for the last couple of minutes, erupted in cheers as Draco and Astoria shared their first kiss as a couple engaged to be married.


	31. Thirty: Onwards and Upwards

CHAPTER THIRTY: _Onwards and Upwards_

A few months later and the wedding plans were coming along very nicely. Draco and Astoria had even set a date: January 6th. They had decided on a winter wedding to be held exactly five years to the day since they became a couple.

They both shared the various organisation tasks that came with the wedding. There was a lot to think about; guests, food, venue, clothing, colour scheme, honeymoon. They took care of each thing together, except the clothing, of course. Draco hadn't realised that taking on the planning of a wedding would amount to the loss of practically every one of his weekends in the months leading up to the event. However, he definitely knew it would be worth it.

Draco had, of course, asked Blaise to be his best man which there was no way on earth Blaise would have said no to. It was strange to think that back in their early school years they hadn't been friends. They had always had similar traits, came from similar, wealthy backgrounds. In a way, they'd started off almost as rivals, each wishing to be better than the other. In the end, they'd realised how ridiculous it all was and figured that having things in common with each other didn't mean they had to compete.

Daphne was over the moon to be Astoria's maid of honour, and Caitlyn was very excited to be a bridesmaid. Zila was also a bridesmaid but was still too young to realise what was going on.

A relatively small guest list was drawn up by Draco and Astoria. Draco didn't really have any immediate family except his mother and so that part had been easy. He'd chosen to invite a few friends of his, including Adrian Pucey, Goyle, Marcus Flint, Terrence Higgs, and a few people from Nimbus including his boss and his wife. Astoria had a larger family than Draco and so all of her aunts, uncles and cousins were invited along with her mum and nan. She'd also invited a few friends from school and a couple of girls who occasionally help her run her shop. The pair also had a few mutual friends who were invited along. All in all, just under fifty people were invited which was very few compared to other typical pureblood marriages.

Hampton Manor Hotel was to be used as the venue for the wedding. The building itself was equally as impressive as Malfoy Manor only with an added bonus for Draco; no haunting memories. The gardens were just as beautiful as those at Malfoy Manor, too, and so the ceremony would take place there with the reception held inside. The hotel would also accommodate everyone involved in and invited to the wedding the night before and the night after - Draco and Astoria would be residing in opposite ends of the huge mansion, to avoid bumping into each other the night before.

Without a doubt their colour scheme would stay traditional to their house to a certain extent. Astoria would be dressed in white, Draco in black with a dark green tie and the decor, green and silver. A three course sit down meal had been chosen over a buffet and a free bar would be provided. Astoria and Draco had decided to take a month off of work and planned to travel around for their honeymoon - neither had done as much traveling as they'd like to have done and this was the perfect opportunity.

The wedding was fast approaching now, and Draco was feeling anxiety mingling in with his excitement. Of course, he would never have second thoughts about the wedding but this stupid voice in the back of his head was telling him Astoria might. In his heart he knew she wouldn't - they were happy. But the voice remained, nonetheless.

It was now a month to go until the big day and Draco and Astoria sat at home, in the lounge, in front of the fire place. December had brought bitter winds and snow and so they decided to warm up by the fire and wrap some christmas gifts with a few butterbeers. Once the wrapping was done, Astoria made her way to the sofa and sat down, stretching her arm out in front of her and watching her ring sparkle. She smiled to herself. It had been on her finger for almost eight months now and she still hadn't got used to it. She sighed contentedly. Draco remained sat cross legged on the carpet, surrounded by wrapped presents.

"I can't wait to be Mrs Astoria Malfoy," Astoria said, happily. She loved saying that out loud.

Draco looked up towards his fiancé, a smile playing on his lips. Then a thought occurred to him. If Astoria took his name, that would mean that she also received the reputation. Complete strangers would shun her upon introduction. How had he never thought of this before?

"Astoria..." he said.

Astoria noticed sudden concern in his voice, she was confused. "What is it?" she asked, curiously.

Draco got up and made his way slowly to sit next to her on the couch. He took her hand in his and looked her in the eye.

"Astoria, I... I don't think you should take my name."

Astoria opened her mouth in outrage to ask him what the hell he was on about but he raised a hand to stop her speaking. She closed her mouth again.

"No. Listen to me. Malfoy is a bad name, Malfoys are bad people. _Everyone _knows the name and everyone knows it means trouble. I don't want you tarred with the same brush, Ria, I can't let that happen."

"Draco, that's absolutely ridiculous!" Astoria said loudly, struggling not to yell at her soon-to-be husband's stupidity. "I thought you'd stopped caring about what everyone else thinks?!"

Draco let go of Astoria's hand and slumped back into the couch, though he remained looking her in the eye. "I stopped caring what people think of me. I care what they think of you! The name - it's... it's unworthy of you."

Astoria shook her head fiercely. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard Draco Malfoy! I am counting down the weeks. The days. Merlin, I'm counting down the seconds until I become Astoria Malfoy. Do you think there's any way that's not going to happen?!"

Draco was completely shocked at Astoria's reaction. He assumed she would disagree but he didn't think she'd turn wild. He was still looking at her, his mouth sagging open a little. He didn't know what to say but it didn't look like he was going to get a word in, anyway.

"My god, Draco! I know you're smart but sometimes you act as though there's no brain in there at all. Do you think if I cared what people thought of me marrying you I'd be sat here with this engagement ring on? Do you think I'd even be with you? I know _you_, the _real _you, not your bloody name. I'm marrying Draco Malfoy. I don't think he's the prick half of the world thinks he is. I don't think that he's a heartless coward like _he_ thinks he is. I think he is the most amazing person I've ever met. He's stuck with his name. Malfoy. And I want to be stuck with it, too!"

Astoria's rant was over and there was silence. Her voice was still ringing in Draco's ears, his mouth still hanging open, pathetically.

"Wow, have you quite finished?" he said, after a few moments.

Astoria was breathing heavily. She'd said all she had to say in practically one breath. She didn't even know where all that came from, it's just that Draco could be so blind sometimes. It was as though he didn't realise how much she loves him. _Still_.

She inhaled and exhaled deeply through her nose. "Sorry, Draco. I had to say that."

Draco shrugged dismissively. He looked back up towards Astoria and the second their eyes met grins spread across both of their faces. Then they both started laughing, and laughing. They didn't stop for a good couple of minutes.

"Seriously, Ri," Draco said, trying to regain composure. "You said some nice things then, but, Merlin..." He snorted with laughter again as Astoria closed her eyes and shook her head.

"I don't really know where that came from!" she confessed. "I guess that's what happens when you say stupid things, you daft idiot."

"So... You're absolutely sure, then? On becoming a Malfoy?" Draco asked.

Astoria's eyes snapped open and she shot him a glare before picking up a cushion and attacking him with it.

"Will! You! Just! Shut! The! Hell! Up!" she shouted, hitting him with every word she spoke and straddling him during the process.

Draco smirked and grabbed her wrists so she couldn't move any more. She struggled against him. As much as she tried, he was way too strong for her.

"Wow, I think this wedding planning has finally driven you to insanity."

"_You've_ driven me to insanity!" Astoria retorted, casting the cushion aside once Draco had released her wrists.

Draco looked up at her with the sad eyes he put on when he was trying to win her round. Being the fool she was, she softened right away and leaned down, nuzzling into his neck and sighing.

"Shall we head up?" she suggested quietly. "I'm knackered."

"I should think you are! You've practically just beaten the shit out of me!"

Astoria snorted with laughter and pulled away from Draco who was getting too comfortable. She knew if they stayed like that he'd be asleep within minutes.

"Come on, go up. I'll clear all this away, I'll be up in a sec."

"Alright," Draco agreed, rubbing his eyes sleepily. He got up and made his way over to the door and just before he left he turned to Astoria and said "How about a double-barrel? Astoria Greengrass-Malfoy, perhaps?" He was only joking, of course, though he tried to act as though he were serious.

Astoria glared at him from across the room.

"No? Astoria Malfoy-Greengrass..?" Draco playfully suggested before a grin appeared on his face.

"You little shit!" Astoria yelled and as she stood, Draco pelted and she chased him upstairs to the bedroom where they play fought like a couple of children. Draco was in stitches. He loved nothing more than to wind up his other half - it was like a hobby to him.

Eventually they both gave up in the struggle and collapsed onto the bed beside each other, panting.

After a few minutes of heavy breathing, followed by silence Astoria asked "Did you really think that I wouldn't have wanted to take your name?"

No response.

"Draco?" She turned to look at him and couldn't help but smile when she saw his chest rising and falling heavily. He'd fallen straight to sleep. She leaned in closer to him. "Someone's getting a bit too old," she whispered affectionately, before kissing him on the forehead and heading to the bathroom to get herself ready for bed.

Christmas came and went in no time at all. This year, the pair spent it at Celia's with all of the family around. They didn't buy each other anything exciting and there were definitely no surprise trips this year; they were already spending way too much on the wedding which was a mere twelve days from christmas. Draco, of course, insisted that they weren't spending too much.

"How can you spend _too much _on the best day of your life? We're only going to have one wedding," he had pointed out.

Along with Blaise, Daphne and just about every other pureblood witch or wizard, Draco and Astoria attended a New Years party hosted my Marcus Flint's parents. Their modestly sized manor house near Exmoor was absolutely packed with people on the night of December 31st. It was to be their final public appearance as an unmarried couple.

Draco still had to shake himself every now and again to realise it was all real. He was only twenty three years old. This wasn't how he would have pictured his life panning out but he wouldn't change it for the world.

Whilst he and Astoria stood up at the bar half an hour before the clocks stuck midnight, Draco was tapped on the shoulder and turned to find himself face to face with none other than Pansy Parkinson. They hadn't so much as breathed the same air since their graduation four and a half years ago.

Draco couldn't help but notice that she looked very different. She'd changed her hair colour, her make-up was a little less overwhelming and her nose wasn't quite so stuck up. Draco wondered whether she'd had a nose job and had to suppress a snort of laughter.

"Well, well, well," he said, looking his ex-girlfriend up and down.

"Hi, Draco," Pansy smiled weakly. Was he hallucinating or did Draco detect a hint of nervousness in the brash cow's voice. Maybe she'd changed her personality as well as her appearance.

"Pansy," Draco greeted her stiffly, Astoria standing by his side. She was most keen to hear what Pansy had to say.

"Umm, I just..." Pansy hesitated, looking from Draco to Astoria and back again. "I just wanted to congratulate the two of you. I... I hear you're getting married next week." Her eyes were darting around, avoiding nowhere but Draco's face. "So, yeah. I guess what I wanted to say was... all the best."

She finally looked up, her eyes meeting his.

"Thanks," Draco said, totally surprised at this mature gesture. Pansy was almost a year older than he was so she was as far from being a child as he was but he still always pictured her as a little girl. Perhaps she really had changed. Change wasn't impossible after all - Draco was living proof of that.

"You too, Astoria," Pansy said, looking towards Astoria who was a similar height to herself. "You both seem really happy together and I'm... I'm really glad."

Astoria's eyes narrowed with suspicion slightly and she glanced towards Draco who shrugged.

"Thanks," Astoria said, slowly, uncertain of whether Pansy was being genuine.

"Anyway, I'd better be off," Pansy said hurriedly. "Theo's around somewhere, he'll be looking for me. See you."

"Yeah, see you round, Pans," Draco said, and with that she disappeared into the crowd.

"What was that about?" Astoria wondered aloud as her and Draco turned back towards the bar.

Draco shrugged again. "God knows. I guess she finally grew up."

"More like she wanted to see if she could change your mind last minute... Either that or she was haggling after an invite," Astoria said smirking and winking up at Draco.

Draco laughed. "Nah... I mean, I dunno. I guess it was her way of getting closure..?" he said, wondering why on earth he was trying to understand the complicated mind of Pansy Parkinson. "Anyway, onwards and upwards!" he said as he and Astoria received their double shots of fire whiskey, raising them, said "here's to the new year" in unison and downed them in a split second.

"Same again?" Draco offered, shooting her a cheeky grin.

Many hours later and Astoria and Draco arrived back at home, both _very _inebriated. The party had been fantastic - everyone had counted down to the new year together and it had been great to see some old faces again. Everyone had wished them well upon learning that they were to be married in less than a weeks time. The pair of them had taken full advantage of the free bar. Well why not? They had both decided against any pre-wedding drinking for fear that their heads wouldn't be clear for their big day. It was their last chance to get completely and utterly drunk before their wedding. And so they did.

Astoria kicked of her heels at the bottom of the stairs as Draco began to climb, tripping over half way. He and Astoria both broke out into fits of childish giggles and Astoria joined him, attempting to help him up.

After five or so attempts, they finally reached the top of the stairs where they disastrously stripped off to their underwear, their clothes littering the bedroom floor. Draco fell backwards onto the bed, still laughing at himself.

"My name is Draco and I'm a dragon!" he said, suddenly, pretending to roar like a dragon. Then he burst into laughter again.

Astoria clambered up onto the bed and joined him, giggling madly at his stupidity.

"Draco's drunk, Draco's drunk!" she teased, making her fingers walk up his bare chest as though they were a person's legs.

Draco turned to her and pulled a stupid face before shifting himself and clambering under the duvet.

"Draco," Astoria whispered, devilishly. "I'm horny."

"Ha!" Draco laughed, harshly. "There's no way this soldier's standing to attention tonight!" he said, patting his bulge fondly through his boxers.

"Pfft," Astoria deflated, feeling disappointed. She flopped down next to him, her head on the pillow.

"In - in five days, I'm going to be your... Your husbud. Your bloody husbud!" Draco yelled gleefully, his eyes closed but a lopsided smile on his lips.

"My husband," Astoria corrected him, giggling again.

"Yeah, that!" Draco agreed.

"And I'm going to be your wife," Astoria whispered in his ear, causing him to shiver.

"Ooooh!" he squealed like a little girl. He turned his head to face her. "'Ello wifey!" he shouted.

Yet another snort of laughter from Astoria. "Ssh!" she held a finger up to his lips and ended up collapsing on top of him.

"Mmm, don't move. I like the feel of your hair on my nipple," Draco said, quietly. He really had no idea what he was saying. Then he made a small noise which indicated his contentedness. "Night, Ri," he said, a daft smile still on his lips as he clumsily stroked her hair.

"Night, handsome," Astoria whispered back and within seconds they both fell into an alcohol-induced sleep.


	32. Thirty One: Now and Forever

CHAPTER THIRTY ONE: _Now and Forever_

It was the night before the wedding and Draco and Blaise were alone in the best suite on the left wing of the Hampton Manor Hotel. Draco sat in an armchair, looking out of the window across the gardens which, in the darkness, looked like a sea of black. If he squinted he could just make out the set up for his and Astoria's wedding tomorrow.

He picked up his glass of fire whiskey, swirling it around the glass before downing it in one go. Bar the slight feeling in his tummy, he was surprised how relaxed he felt. He felt at ease. He wondered whether he would feel the same way tomorrow morning.

Blaise lay somewhere behind him on one of the two huge four poster beds, facing up at the ceiling, one leg bent at the knee, his head resting on his arms.

"How come all the guests aren't here?" Blaise asked.

"Oh, they're all staying tomorrow night. It's just everyone directly involved that's staying tonight," Draco informed his friends. "We also extended the reception invite list, in the end. Mother insisted I should have invited some pureblood connections. Seems like inviting them for the sake of inviting them to me, so I told her they could come to the reception. Didn't really want them at the wedding..."

Draco shifted in his chair so he was looking at his best man.

"That's right, isn't it?" he asked, although he was searching for reassurance that he'd made the right decision. "I mean, a wedding's for family and friends. People you love. It's sharing something personal. I didn't want to invite people just because their blood is pure."

"Yeah, that's fair enough, mate." Blaise was as elaborate as ever.

"I invited the lads' families to the reception, too, so there will be a lot more at the party than the ceremony."

A silence hung over the pair for a while as Draco turned back towards the window. He wondered what Astoria were doing over in the right wing of the mansion. Wondered what her and Daphne were talking about. Wondered whether she had cornish pixies flying around her stomach as he currently did.

After swiftly downing his third and final fire whiskey (he had no intentions of being hungover on his wedding day) he fumbled inside his pocket and took out a worn piece of parchment. His vows. He'd been over and over them so many times he'd lost count. He had to make sure they were perfect.

Blaise looked over at Draco and shook his head, laughing slightly. Draco turned his head sharply.

"What?" he demanded.

"Draco, if you read those vows one more time the parchment is just gunna disintegrate in your hand. They're _fine_. Stop worrying about them."

Draco took Blaise's advice and stowed them away in his trouser pocket again.

"D'you reckon you and Daphne will ever tie the knot?" Draco asked suddenly.

Blaise mulled Draco's words over in his head like a mature mead. It wasn't as if the idea hadn't crossed his mind before. He'd just decided not to dwell on it. Blaise deflated as though Draco's question had defeated him.

"I dunno," he answered, truthfully. "I've thought about it, I really have. I just can't see myself in your position. With you it - it seems right. For me, to imagine us swapped around is - is weird."

Draco considered these words, though he didn't really understand. Blaise and Daphne were strong. Although they'd been together a little less time than he and Astoria, they'd had feelings for each other for a lot longer. And they had a child. To Draco, a child seemed like a stronger bond than marriage, in a way. Marriage can be disposed of, whereas a child cannot. A child connects two people for life, whereas a marriage does not, indefinitely.

"You'll do it one day, I know you will," Draco said, certainly.

"Anyway!" Blaise said, as though he no longer wished to pursue this path of conversation. He heaved himself up and perched on the end of the bed, momentarily. "_You _are getting married _tomorrow_ so why the bloody hell are we talking about me?!"

He got up and made his way over to the table where the bottle of fire whiskey lay with two empty glasses, unscrewed the cap and poured two separate measures.

Draco shook his head sheepishly. "Nah, mate. I've had three, you know what I'm like. I need a clear head tomorrow more than ever."

"Come on, one more!" Blaise encouraged, offering him a glass. "I wanna toast you and all that."

Draco grinned and folded easily. "Alright, then," he said, taking the glass. The two men stood.

Blaise spoke. "To Draco Malfoy, my best mate, my brother. The little rebel badass of Hogwarts and look at him now, getting married at twenty three!" Blaise grinned as Draco laughed appreciatively. "Cheers mate, all the best. In everything."

Blaise raised his glass and Draco brought his up, too. They met with a loud clink.

"Cheers, Blaise," Draco said, and together they downed the shots.

"Right, bed time!" Draco announced, wandering in the general direction of the bathroom after putting his glass down. "I need at least eight hours, it's eleven now, and we need to be up at eight so that's nine hours if I'm lucky!"

"Pfft, yeah. It'll be me that's unlucky. I haven't missed your snoring one bit since we left school!"

"I do not snore!" Draco yelled defensively from the bathroom, while wondering why he always took such offense to accusations that he snores.

Blaise, who was chuckling to himself, clambered into the bed which was positioned on the opposite side of the gigantic room as Draco's. Several minutes later Draco padded through from the bathroom in just his boxers, took one last look at his suit hanging up ready, and muttered 'nox', the lights extinguishing immediately.

He made his way through the darkness, not to bed, but over to the large window where he leant his head against the wall and stared across to the opposite side of the building, to the room which he knew Astoria to be in. He stood quietly for a few minutes watching the room, until the light in her window vanished. For some reason, the thought of her climbing into bed ahead of their wedding tomorrow made his heart leap. He was feeling a great mixture of emotions and all he could do was wonder whether she was feeling the same.

Smiling to himself he turned slowly and made his way to bed. His last nights sleep before he made his girl truly his.

What seemed like only a mere hour or so later, but was actually eight in the morning, Draco awoke to a tapping on the door of their suite. He sat bolt up right and went to see who is was as Blaise groaned sleepily. It was his mother.

"Oh, darling," his mother cooed, as she entered the room carrying a small tray of food. She was already dressed in her mother-of-the-groom outfit.

"What are you, the room service?" Draco asked sarcastically, as he rubbed his eyes.

Narcissa pointedly chose to ignore this comment. "How are you feeling?" she asked, a wide smile on her face, her eyes surveying her only son carefully.

"Umm, excited, nervous... Merlin, mother, I'm shitting my pants!" Draco said as reality washed over him. He made his way swiftly to the bathroom where he splashed his face with cold water. He didn't wish that this feeling was normal, he only wished that Astoria was feeling the same.

"You have to eat, Draco," his mother called. "I brought your favourites up! Bacon and scrambled egg on toast and fresh fruit."

"Mum, I can't... I - I feel sick. Really bloody sick." He was starting to worry now whether this was the usual way to feel.

Narcissa smiled. "Oh, son. It's only natural," she said, walking over to him and ruffling his hair. He pulled away from her and smoothed his hair back down again. "Whatever you're feeling, Astoria is feeling it, too," Narcissa reassured him.

"Do you think?" Draco asked. He so desperately sought comfort.

He and his mother continued to talk as Blaise dragged himself out of bed and into the shower.

"Draco, this is the biggest day of your life. You're bound to feel a little funny. And as long as whatever you're feeling isn't doubt-"

"What!" Draco interrupted her. "Of course it isn't doubt. I've never been so sure of anything in my life." His mother raised her eyebrows smugly as if to say 'that's exactly my point'.

"There you go," she said. "You would fight a million men for that girl, Draco, I know you would. But you don't have to. All you have to do is go down there and tell her how you feel. That's not so scary, is it?"

Draco shook his head and smiled, completely reassured by his mother's words. Though she drove him insane sometimes, he loved her very much. He wandered over to the tray of food she'd brought him and began to tuck in hungrily, the sick feeling in his stomach subsiding more and more by the minute.

"Anyway, I'm going to fix my make-up and I'll leave you boys to it," Narcissa said. "See you down there."

Draco made his way back over to her, wanting to hug her but not quite knowing how to initiate it. They didn't often show affection in such a manner. Narcissa seemed to understand this and pulled him into a hug before holding him at arms length and resting a hand on his cheek.

"Good luck, son. I love you so very much."

"I love you, too, mum," Draco said, and with that she turned and left.

Two hours later and Draco was dressed in an immaculate suit; black trousers and suit jacket, a pristine white shirt and a dark green tie. His hair was perfectly styled, his shoes perfectly shined. A single white carnation was placed in his buttonhole.

He walked over to the full length mirror and examined himself, straightening his tie and smoothing the back of his hair nervously. He stared at himself for a good couple of minutes. He thought back to the image that had been reflected to him back in his sixth year at school and could hardly believe he was the same person. That was mostly down to the woman he was set to marry in less than an hours time.

"Looking slick," Blaise said as he appeared behind Draco in the mirror. Draco turned and the two men grinned at each other. Naturally, their outfits completely matched. Blaise was fiddling with the cuff of his sleeve. "Nerves gone?"

"Gone," Draco confirmed, nodding his head. "Got the rings?"

"Of course," Blaise reassured him. "Got the vows?"

"Oh, I won't be needing them," Draco said confidently.

Blaise noticed the gleam in his friend's eye and felt so happy for him. He deserved this. He reached out a hand and clapped Draco playfully on the arm. "Come on then, let's do it!"

Draco breathed deeply through his nose before taking a last glance in the mirror and agreeing. "Let's do it!"

By the time Draco and Blaise reached the gardens it was only fifteen minutes before the ceremony began. As Draco arrived, all of the guests turned to him and smiled broadly. He walked underneath the arch of white flowers and down the deep green carpet which had been placed over the lawns to form a temporary aisle for the wedding. It was the sixth of January and would have been very chilly outside if it weren't for the fact that enchantments had been cast over the area to ensure that everyone was kept warm.

He thanked everyone for their luck as he passed and he and Blaise took up their positions in the front row of seats on the right hand side. The official who was conducting the wedding came over to offer Draco a few words of assurance though they weren't really needed.

At one minute to eleven, Draco's heart was beating ten times faster than was normal. He was so, so excited to see Astoria walking down that aisle towards him. Just then, soft music began to play and Draco's legs carried him forwards of their own free will, away from the chairs and he turned to look down the aisle, Blaise right by his side.

Then she appeared. Her white dress flowed elegantly to the floor, hugging at her waist and hips, the neckline scooping low enough to subtly reveal her cleavage. A thin shawl was placed around her shoulders to ensure that she didn't get cold. Her hair was elegantly pinned up, with curls falling loosely around her face which was so delicately and beautifully made up. Upon her head lay an understated yet stunning little tiara, the jewels glinting in the weak winter sunlight. She held a simple bunch of white carnations in her hands to match those on Draco and Blaise's buttonholes.

When Draco saw her it was as though no-one else was around him. It took all of his conscious effort for him to stop his jaw hitting the floor. He'd never seen her looking so beautiful in his life. She smiled almost shyly as their eyes met and she began making her way slowly down the aisle, Daphne, Caitlyn and Zila in pursuit.

There were a few slight gasps and murmurs in the crowd as everyone's eyes rested upon her.

"She looks beautiful," Blaise whispered in Draco's ear.

"Yeah, she does," Draco muttered back. He felt completely numb as she drew closer and closer. What seemed like an eternity later, she reached him and he stepped forward, the two of them standing before the official.

"You look beautiful," Draco whispered to her, his grey eyes looking right into her green. He felt emotional, he didn't think he'd feel this emotional just seeing her. Astoria smiled widely, and glanced down. She seemed so shy, so innocent. It was as if they were starting all over again from this moment.

Astoria passed her flowers behind to Daphne. Everyone was seated and the ceremony commenced.

"I welcome you all here today to witness the joining in marriage of Mr Draco Malfoy and Miss Astoria Greengrass."

The couple smiled, not taking their eyes off of each other. Draco's heart was so filled with happiness already - happiness he never thought he'd have, happiness he never thought he'd deserve - that he thought his heart would explode.

"Are you both happy to commence?" the official asked. They both responded with a nod of their heads as though too lost for words. "I believe you have written your own vows. Mr Malfoy, if you will..."

Draco swallowed hard. This was it. He hoped he wouldn't mess it up. He took Astoria's hands in his and looked her right in the eye. He wanted her to know that he meant every word with all of his heart.

"I, Draco Lucius Malfoy, take you, Astoria Greengrass to be my wife. From this day forward, I promise to protect you from harm. I promise to honour and respect you and continue to place my trust in you as I have done from this day five years ago. I will always be by your side when you need me and I promise to love you until the very last breath that I take."

He breathed deeply, before smiling nervously and glancing around as Blaise brought over Astoria's ring. Draco took it from him, his hand shaking ever so slightly, as he released Astoria's right hand and held only her left. He slipped the ring onto her finger carefully as she watched over him. As he slipped the ring on, his eyes met hers once more and he said, "I give you this ring as a token of my love and of our marriage. I promise that, however hard or easy things may be, I will love you. Always."

Astoria smiled warmly and he smiled, struggling not to let out the slightest sigh of relief. He'd done it. He'd remembered his vows.

"And now Astoria, if you will," the official encouraged.

Astoria cleared her throat. She hadn't spoken a word to Draco since the ceremony had began. She reached out and took his hands in hers as he had done, maintaining eye contact the whole while. When she spoke her voice was soft.

"I, Astoria Greengrass, take you, Draco Lucius Malfoy to be my husband. I promise to cherish every day with you as if it is my last. I promise to comfort you when you most need it and go to any length to shield you from harm. I will respect you, always, and my love for you will never, ever fade."

Draco had listened intently, savouring every single word as she spoke. He wanted this moment etched in his brain for the rest of his life.

She looked up at Blaise who hurried back over with Draco's ring before returning to his seat. Astoria carefully placed the ring onto Draco's finger and looked back up into his eyes.

"I give you this ring, not only as a token of our marriage, but of my dedication to you. Whatever life throws at us, we will fight it together. And I will always, always love you."

The vows were over. Astoria had noticed how intently Draco had watched her as she'd spoken. It was as though, for the first time, it was finally dawning on him how much she loved him. He smiled at her sheepishly, and she smiled back as the pair of them waited for the official to speak.

"I must ask if anyone with us knows of any reason why these two people should not be bound by marriage here today."

Draco had expected to feel nervous at this part but he didn't. He looked around at Blaise who winked at him, then turned back to his beautiful... wife. Wow.

The silence lasted for a few seconds before the official said. "In that case, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

Draco stepped forward slightly, towards Astoria. He brought his hand up and lay it gently on her face, rubbing her cheek with his thumb and he looked right into Astoria's eyes before resting his forehead on hers. The two of them allowed their eyes to fall closed as their lips met softly in their first kiss as a married couple. Draco felt his heart soar and cheers and clapping erupted from every single guest present. When the pair eventually came apart and smiled to each other and then turned to face everyone, grinning as their walk-out music began to play.

Draco offered his arm to Astoria. "Mrs Malfoy," he said. Astoria's heart leapt at the very words. She was Mrs Malfoy. She could hardly believe it was true. She looked up at Draco and linked her arm through his, smiling all the while, as the guests all rose to their feet.

Astoria and Draco slowly made their way back down the aisle as a married couple, beaming from ear to ear. Astoria was sure that her face was going to ache by the end of the day. But she wouldn't care if it did. Or if every single muscle in her body ached at the end of the day. All she cared about was that she was Mrs Astoria Malfoy. Now and forever.


	33. Thirty Two: Astoria Malfoy

CHAPTER THIRTY TWO: _Astoria Malfoy_

It was traditional for the guests to gather at the wedding reception of a witch and wizard ahead of the newly married couple, in order for the couple to make their first grand entrance together and so, naturally, this was what happened at Draco and Astoria's wedding.

There were many more guests gathered in Hampton Manor Hotel grand hall than there had been in the gardens for the ceremony, and this was mostly due to Draco's mother who was unable to refrain herself from inviting a few well connected people to her son's wedding. Draco hadn't wanted her to do so at first but then he decided that, as it were to be the happiest day of his life, he probably wouldn't care.

Just under an hour after the ceremony had ended, Draco and Astoria mentally prepared themselves in one of the upper corridors for their entrance, which would lead them down the grand staircase into the hall with all eyes on them.

"I feel as though I'm going to trip!" Astoria fretted as Draco vainly checked his hair in a mirror.

Draco chuckled. "The hardest bit is over. All we have to do now is walk down some stairs. How worried can you be about walking down some stairs?"

Astoria looked at him apprehensively and he caught her doing so in the reflection. He turned around to face her, and cupped her face with his hand.

"Stop worrying about everything being perfect and just enjoy it," he advised her. She smiled up at him and he noticed her visually relax at his words. They spent a few silent moments simply looking at each other.

"My god, you look so, so beautiful," Draco said.

Astoria glanced down shyly then looked back up at him and said "And I've never seen you looking so dapper, Malfoy."

Draco smirked. "Err, the Malfoy thing doesn't really wash now, seeing as I can do it back to you. Malfoy."

Astoria laughed as Draco cockily raised his eyebrows. Their eyes connected for a couple of seconds before they were locked in a heated kiss, Draco's hand finding the back of Astoria's neck, assuring that she could not escape. When they eventually broke apart, their breathing was slightly heavier than it had been previously.

"Shall we go down?" Draco asked regretfully, checking his watch.

Astoria nodded. Part of her was very much looking forward to the reception. The other part just wanted to take Draco by the hand and lead him straight to the bedroom. But she knew that part would come later so she'd just have to wait. They were staying another night in a Hampton Manor suite (together, this time!) before beginning their honeymoon travels the following day.

Draco and Astoria appeared at the top of the stairway and all the guests congregated at the bottom, all looking up in anticipation, eager to congratulate the newlyweds. There were a good eighty or so people there, now. Draco's eyes sought his mother, who was standing at the front of the bunch beaming proudly. Then he scanned the room for Blaise and Daphne, who were stood together next to the bannister. Blaise had an arm around Daphne's shoulder, with Zila balanced on his other.

Draco grinned to his mate and shot him a wink although he felt an emotional pang inside seeing Zila. His mind was cast, for a brief second, to thoughts of his own daughter and how different things could have been if she were there. But he couldn't think about that right now. Today of all days he and Astoria would be happy.

The pair made their way gracefully down the stairs, arm in arm. Astoria didn't trip, as she'd feared and they were greeted with many kisses, hugs and handshakes once they reached the bottom.

The afternoon passed swiftly; the three course meal that everyone sat down for was absolutely delicious. There wasn't a single scrap of food remaining on the silver plates which were scattered up and down the several long tables.

After the meal came the speeches. Blaise, as best man, went first. He talked about a few memories he had of Draco from school, then he'd gone on to say how good he and Astoria were for each other. The usual, really. Everyone had raised a toast to the happy couple and then it was Draco's turn. He rose from his seat at the high table, between Astoria and Blaise, consciously aware of eighty or so pairs of eyes on him. He'd never had such a big audience for a 'Malfoy speech'. He cleared his throat.

"Right, I'll try and make this quick. I don't want Blaise and Ad chanting at me, or anything like that!" Everyone laughed. "Okay. I haven't got anything written down so this is, erm, straight from the heart, I guess." Astoria was looking up at him, proudly, from her seat, smiling from ear to ear. "Firstly I'd like to thank our three beautiful bridesmaids. Caitlyn-"

Draco leaned over to catch sight of Caitlyn near the end of the high table. "Caitlyn, you look stunning, little lady. Check out that dress and those flowers in your hair. Don't you look like a princess? Thank you for being a bridesmaid for us. And Zila Rose..."

Zila was sat on her mother's knee. Daphne, who was only one seat away from Draco, passed Zila up to Draco who smiled as he held her in his arms. There were a few 'aww's from around the room. "My perfect little god daughter, who really doesn't have a clue what's going on right now."

Zila gripped Draco's hand tightly and said "Da-co" right on queue. More laughter. "This little girl's like an angel. Look at that cheeky face." Draco grinned. "What an amazing bridesmaid she's been." Draco kissed the top of her head before handing her back to her mother.

"And, Daphne. I guess I can call you my sister now, right?" Daphne grinned up at Draco and nodded. "You look absolutely beautiful today. We've been friends for so many years I've lost count. And now we're family, you lucky thing! Thanks for sticking with me, like a true friend and thank you for believing in me." Daphne rose from her seat again to give Draco a quick kiss on each cheek.

"Now, Blaise," Draco said, looking down at his best friend on his right. "My best man, my best friend, my brother. I couldn't have got through many of these years without you. Thank you so much for everything you've done for me. From the bottom of my heart, man." Blaise stood and they embraced each other in a rather manly manner for a split second. "And hurry up and get this one down the aisle, because I wanna be a best man while I've still got these dashing good looks," Draco joked. Much laughter echoed around their company as Blaise rolled his eyes, though there was a smile on his face.

"I can't go on without saying a few words for my mother. My wonderful mother," Draco said, looking at his mum who was seated in the chair next to Blaise. "God, I'm gunna get ribbed for this. I already get called 'mummy's boy'" Draco jested. "Mum, thanks for sticking by me through every decision I ever made. Some of the things I've done I could not have done without you and you helped make me the person I am today. So thanks for that."

Narcissa stood, teary eyed, and hugged her son tightly. She muttered words of love and encouragement in his ear as he kissed her on the cheek, then she sat back down again.

"To every guest in this room, I just want to say thank you for joining Astoria and I on this day. It means a lot to both of us that you could all be here. And finally, my beautiful wife, Astoria Malfoy." Draco looked down at Astoria, who was already welling up as his mother had done.

"Sorry to all you ladies out there, but this girl sat right here is the most beautiful girl in this room... In my life. Today marks the fifth anniversary of the day we first became a couple and I can't tell you how much this girl has done for me since that day. If I stop for a second and try to imagine my life without her, then things could've been very, very different for me. She's helped me through so much and she's made me a better person. She's the most amazing person I know and not only for putting up with me every day! This is the first day of our new lives together and, as far as I'm concerned, this'll last until the very end." Astoria wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. "So everyone, if you could join me in raising your glasses to my beautiful wife. The only one I truly need. Astoria."

Draco raised his glass and every single person in the room followed suit. Astoria stood and flung her arms around Draco's neck and hugged him so tightly. She never wanted to let go. Today was just perfect. The pair of them shared a tender kiss as the room burst into applause, and they resumed their seats.

That evening, Draco noticed how time really flew by when you were surrounded by the people you love. He'd taken a moment to sit alone at the bar and was admiring Astoria, who looked positively glowing as she chatted to her friends across the other side of the room, from afar when Goyle took up the seat next to him. Weirdly, they hadn't been alone in each others' company since they were about seventeen years old.

Goyle's beady eyes met Draco's and a wonky smile appeared on his face.

"You look happy," he said, simply.

Draco smiled at his one-time best pal's words. He didn't really know how to respond.

"I never thought you would we getting married when you was still a kid," Goyle went on.

"Goyle, we're not kids anymore," Draco pointed out. "Look at me, I'm a manager at Nimbus. I've got a wife. Look at Daphne and Blaise," Draco said, waving an arm in their general direction. "They've got a child. Look at yourself, you've got -" Suddenly Draco broke off, not having a clue where he was planning on going with this. What_ did_ Goyle have? He didn't have a clue. Now he just looked a complete knob.

"I guess you guys got lucky, Malfoy. I ain't got nothing," Goyle said with painful honesty.

Draco winced at his friends' words. He felt a twinge of guilt, thinking back to the way he used to treat Goyle at school. Goyle wasn't a bad person, he was just a bit... Well, stupid.

"It might seem like that now," Draco tried to save the conversation. "But good things come to those who wait, my friend." He gave Goyle a friendly clap on the back.

Goyle smiled at Draco again. "You was always gunna have it all, Draco. I knew that right from the start. It's something in your eyes."

It was then that Draco decided that he'd tell his friend something that not many people knew. It was worth it, if it would give him hope for himself.

"Mate, seriously, I don't have it all." Goyle's eyes surveyed him questionably. "I love my job, I love my girl. But the one thing I want more than anything is a child, Greg. Me and Astoria, we were having a girl. A while back now. She died." Goyle's mouth hung open in shock. "I didn't think we'd ever get through it but we did. And I would do anything to have my little girl here today."

"Draco, I'm sorry. That's dead horrible."

Draco nodded in agreement. "But. We'll try again one day and hopefully things will work out better next time. We'll wait, because good things come to those who wait," Draco reiterated his point and smiled sadly at his friend. "And anyway, I had nothing after the war, mate, and I decided to change that for myself. So, whatever it is that you want, you go out there and you get it. Okay?"

Goyle considered Draco's words before smiling again. "Thanks, Draco. You always was the smart one of us three."

Draco laughed as he watched Goyle get up and plunder back across the dance floor to where his family were. Well, that was his good deed for the day done.

As the night got later, Astoria and Draco passed their first dance without any glitches. Draco had kept it as short and sweet as possible without disappointing everyone. Draco and Astoria made sure to speak to every single guest and thank them for coming. They made sure everyone was having a good time, and more importantly, that everyone's drinks kept being topped up. By the time the clock struck midnight, everyone was well and truly tipsy, Astoria and Draco probably more so than everyone else. At around half twelve they decided to retire to their suite.

After several minutes of tipsily wandering up and down one of the hotel corridors a giggling Draco and Astoria eventually found the door to their suite. Draco fumbled around with the key and once he managed to get the door open the pair rushed in, hand in hand. Draco closed the door firmly behind them. They stood for a few seconds, allowing their eyes to adjust to the darkness. The only source of light was coming from the crack underneath the door and a few dim fairy lights in the garden way below. Draco stood with his back leaning against the door, feeling a little light-headed and breathless. Astoria giggled wildly, as she always did after a few drinks and slowly Draco's heavy breathing slowly quietened. Then a silence hung over them in anticipation of what was to come next.

Astoria slipped off her shoes and made her way over to Draco, stopping right before him. Her eyes still shone, even with the little amount of light there was. He ran his fingers lightly down her arms and his touch made her shiver. Still. After five years. They made their way slowly towards the bed, Draco standing behind Astoria. With one quick, non-verbal spell, her hair was let down loose and he gently moved it over one of her shoulders, exposing her bare neck. He planted a soft kiss there before slowly undoing the zip on her dress, which ran from the base of her neck to the small of her back. Her breathing was shallow. She couldn't wait for her husband to make love to her.

Draco eased the dress off of her shoulders, and let it drop to the floor. Another simple spell, and it was hanging elegantly from the outside of the wardrobe. Draco wrapped his arms around Astoria, who now stood in just her underwear. She stood patiently, as he left a trail of kisses down her neck and along her shoulder, before turning her around to kiss her lips.

She groaned against his mouth softly as he kissed her, her eyes drifting shut. His hands caressed her sides lovingly before he made to begin removing his own clothes. The suit jacket went before Astoria began to undo his shirt buttons one by one, each time revealing a tiny bit more of his gorgeously pale body. The shirt fell to the floor and she made quick work of his belt, his trousers quickly joining his discarded shirt. He stood in front of her in his boxers, allowing her eyes to drink him in. He was already unyielding.

Astoria traced her tongue hungrily along her bottom lip. She was hoping that tonight would be like their first time all over again. Their lips found each others' once more, only now it didn't feel soft and loving. It felt like fire. Astoria took a tight grip on Draco's hair as he firmly grasped her bum. They were kissing like they never had before - it had gone beyond passionate.

As they moved, Draco toppled backwards onto the bed, pulling Astoria down on top of him. He reached around, unhooking her bra with ease and casting it aside, leaving her completely exposed. He strained upwards, taking one of her nipples roughly into his mouth and causing her breath to hitch.

She tugged blindly, impatiently, at the waistband of his boxers. Draco chuckled at her eagerness to remove his last item of clothing.

"You're going to have to try harder than that," he warned her. She couldn't see the smirk playing across his lips but she damn well knew it was there. She muttered a quick spell and Draco's underwear vanished. Before he even had time to realise what she'd done, her mouth was around him.

"Shit," Draco moaned. He collapsed back down, his hand gripping her hair in encouragement. She'd caught him completely off guard as intended. "Oh, Ri. Ri, fuck. You get better at that every time," Draco moaned, huskily.

Suddenly she switched positions, keeping her mouth at his cock but presenting him with herself. Draco groaned hungrily, before teasing her with his tongue. Her legs almost gave way. She'd always been extra sensitive against the warmth of his mouth. They went on like this for a while before Draco just couldn't wait any longer.

"Ria I need to make love to you. Now."

Though she was still tipsy, she could detect the sheer desperation in his voice. It was time to give him what he asked for.

She switched their position again and slowly sunk herself down onto him.

"Oh, god!" Draco yelled, his hands scrabbling around as the pleasure took a complete hold of his body. Astoria took things slowly at first, easing herself up and down, before position herself on her feet, legs bent at the knees, so she could make love to her husband properly.

Draco stared at her in wonderment. As amazing as her body was, it was her face he was looking at. He was wide-eyed and had a faintly joyous look written across his face. He loved watching the faces she pulled every time his cock brushed her most sensitive spot. She was the most beautiful thing in the world.

Astoria had amazing stamina. She kept going for a while, the two of them moaning, yelling, screaming each others' names.

"Dra-Draco," Astoria panted, breathlessly. "Did you... charm the room? Every - everyone must be able to... to hear us."

Draco took the opportunity to scoop her up and turn her onto her back, positioning himself between her legs.

"I took care of it," he whispered in her ear. "So feel free to scream as loud as you like when I give you my best." And with that, he thrust his full length inside her. Over and over, he just kept on going. He didn't know where all this energy had come from but he was certainly grateful. Astoria was screaming his name with practically every thrust he gave her.

"Wow, Draco!" she panted after twenty minutes of him relentlessly giving her all he had. "Aren't you... aren't you tired."

Draco breathed heavily. "No but I... I think I'm gunna come pretty soon."

"Mmm," Astoria moaned with delight.

Draco took a finger and began eagerly rubbing Astoria, wanting them to come at the same time. He could always tell when she was close, and a couple of minutes later he'd brought her to that stage with ease.

"Draco I - I'm going to come for you any second," she warned him.

He didn't have enough time to respond. He suddenly felt like there was an explosion somewhere in his lower abdomen and his balls tightened. "Ohhh, Astoria," he groaned in a deep voice as he began to shake more violently than she had ever seen. Seeing him lose control like that sent her over the edge, too.

"Draco!" she screamed, as they clung to each other tightly. Draco was still shaking as Astoria clawed at his back. He could feel her tightening on his cock as she came and he loved it.

Once Draco's heart rate steadied, he slowly eased himself out of her. Looking down he noticed that he was covered in her arousal.

"Oh, god, Astoria, look what you've done to me," he muttered, his voice husky.

She started mumbling some excuse, feeling a little embarrassed until he told her "That's so sexy. I love it."

The pair of them eventually made their way to the bathroom to clean up, and then collapsed back down onto the bed, Astoria cuddled up to Draco, both looking up at the ceiling.

"Wow," she whispered breathlessly before giggling.

"Whoever said sex became boring after marriage was soooo completely wrong," Draco announced. "Because that was fucking amazing. Look," he said, taking her hand and placing it on his chest. "My heart won't stop banging on my ribs."

Astoria giggled again as she nuzzled into Draco's neck, keeping her hand resting on his heartbeat. Draco smiled to himself just before Astoria spoke softly through the darkness.

"Draco. I feel so safe when I'm in your arms."

He smiled once again. The words he loved to hear more than any others.

"You _are_ safe in my arms, beautiful," he whispered back. "The two of us have had enough pain to last a lifetime. There's no way I'd let anyone or anything hurt you ever again."

Astoria made a contented little noise as Draco kissed the top of her head.

"Goodnight, Astoria," Draco said, softly.

"Goodnight, Draco," she whispered back.

Cuddled up so close, each couldn't see the other smiling in the darkness. They were happy. Draco and Astoria Malfoy were happy.


End file.
